Please take my whisky!

January 27, 2015 4:39 PM

I have a couple of unopened bottles of whisky that I don't want. No one I have asked wants them. Normally I use Craigslist to give away stuff I don't want anymore, but listing alcohol is against the TOS for both Craigslist and Freecycle. I have also heard that food banks don't accept alcohol. I hate throwing away perfectly good stuff. Does anyone know of somewhere I can donate them, or any other way to legally find them a good home?
posted by insoluble uncertainty to Grab Bag (33 answers total)

Have you been invited to any super bowl parties this weekend? Show up with a bag of chips and your bottles of whisky. Leave with a belly full of chips.
posted by phunniemee at 4:42 PM on January 27, 2015 [25 favorites]

Are you in Australia? Shouldn't be hard to get rid of. If you're in Melbourne, I'll take them.
posted by Athanassiel at 4:44 PM on January 27, 2015 [2 favorites]

If you disclosed your location, I'm pretty sure you could find a Mefite willing to take them off your hands.
posted by sparklemotion at 4:44 PM on January 27, 2015 [11 favorites]

Serious ideas:
- take them to work and raffle them with proceeds going to a charity of your choice.
- donate them to a local community group as a prize.
- donate them to an organisation that does baking things that need the odd dose of whisky (church group, CWA, similar).

Honestly though, all you'd have to do in Australia is leave them on the kerb with a note saying: "free to good home".
posted by Athanassiel at 4:47 PM on January 27, 2015 [5 favorites]

Neighbors? Officemates?
posted by erst at 4:48 PM on January 27, 2015

Do you use facebook? Either just post a status saying you want to give them away, or search for a group called " buy sell trade" or similar and join that.
posted by the agents of KAOS at 4:49 PM on January 27, 2015 [1 favorite]

Mod note: Folks, unless the OP updates to specifically request a volunteer, please don't do that here.
posted by restless_nomad (staff) at 4:52 PM on January 27, 2015 [1 favorite]

Do you have a favorite non-profit in your area that does events with alcohol? You could donate them for those events, particularly if they're open bar without a bartender type of situations (who might bring the alcohol themselves).
posted by barchan at 4:55 PM on January 27, 2015

I was going to make the same suggestion as barchan -- give them to a non-profit that hosts events from time to time. This will work better if they know who you are; even though they're unopened many people will feel weird about accepting consumables from a complete stranger.
posted by Nerd of the North at 5:06 PM on January 27, 2015

It might be useful to know why no one wants these. Unless you're running with a non-drinking crowd, there's usually some adventurous soul willing to try free alcohol. Or a baker who can use them for flavor purposes in rum cakes, etc. But truly awful whiskey, esp homebrews, may be best served down the drain.
posted by beaning at 5:07 PM on January 27, 2015 [3 favorites]

I second beaning. Unless you hang out with a crowd of teetotalers, the fact that no one you've asked wants them makes me wonder whether they're bottom-shelf. Could you let us know the brand(s)?
posted by brianogilvie at 5:13 PM on January 27, 2015

When I needed to give away alcohol I just posted about it on Facebook, and some of my friend volunteered to take it off my hands.

Another option to consider would be to wrap it up and give it as a thank you gift to someone who does you a favour of some kind.
posted by jacquilynne at 5:17 PM on January 27, 2015

Save them for that occasion when somebody does you a big favor, and you want to say thanks. Nothing says it like booze!
posted by computech_apolloniajames at 5:19 PM on January 27, 2015 [1 favorite]

Response by poster: I am totally happy to give it to a mefite if that is OK with the mods. (I assume there is a good reason that listing alcohol is banned on other sites, so I understand if they are not OK with this). It is two 750 ml bottles of regular Jameson whisky, and I live in the SF bay peninsula. Memail me if you want more info.

Some more info:
- I don't have any coworkers because I am self-employed (otherwise I would just leave it on the break room table or something).
- My friends are more of the beer & wine types, so no takers.
- I don't use Facebook, and I would prefer to find a way to get rid of it without reaching out to people I don't see that often just to ask them if they want some whisky.
posted by insoluble uncertainty at 5:31 PM on January 27, 2015

Serious answer: have a Mefi meetup.
posted by MexicanYenta at 5:34 PM on January 27, 2015 [22 favorites]

Are any of the beer and wine types academics? Send the bottles with them to work. Some grad student or professor will be happppppy to take them off your hands. :)
posted by joycehealy at 6:09 PM on January 27, 2015

Check your memail.
posted by rtha at 6:13 PM on January 27, 2015 [4 favorites]

I was going to make the same suggestion as barchan -- give them to a non-profit that hosts events from time to time.

In the US this would be problematic, and in some states would be very difficult to do legally w/r/t laws governing sales and serving laws for alcohol.
posted by desuetude at 6:34 PM on January 27, 2015

Take them out and leave it on the curb in front of your house. They'll be gone the next morning.
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 6:59 PM on January 27, 2015 [1 favorite]

Leaving 1500 ml of liquor on the curb is a truly terrible idea (no offense). Access to such a large amount of alcohol could really mess up someone who comes across it and is an alcoholic living on the street; never mind if a child or an animal got into it.
posted by threeants at 7:27 PM on January 27, 2015 [10 favorites]

Seconding the meetup idea.
posted by bleep at 7:31 PM on January 27, 2015

Donating to a nonprofit may or may not work depending on your state liquor laws. Where I am a nonprofit can't accept donated alcohol, no way, no how. Go with one of the extra-institutional suggestions.
posted by Miko at 8:06 PM on January 27, 2015

Even your friends who don't drink whiskey regularly may be happy to take a bottle for the liquor cabinet for the occasional needs (baking, eggnog, toddies) that come up. Assuming you have no takers there though, I would think your next door neighbor might be happy to have it.

Please don't leave it on the street. Better to pour it down the drain than leave it out for children, animals or vagrants to get into.
posted by fingersandtoes at 8:35 PM on January 27, 2015

Face it: no one you know wants them.

Abandoning them could harm your reputation, since anyone who notices you doing this will think you're an irresponsible person.

It's also reckless to leave anything glass on or near a sidewalk or street, since it's likely to shatter sooner or later, and then someone is likely to step on the shards.

The best thing you can do is to dump them down the drain and recycle the bottles. Even though you don't want to.

See "sunk costs fallacy."
posted by John Cohen at 11:03 PM on January 27, 2015 [1 favorite]

Best answer: Opened whiskey doesn't really go bad. Do you cook? Would you be comfortable using them as an ingredient for cooking?

I've had a pork roast that was covered in a whiskey glaze once that was just divine.

More ideas and recipes: Whiskey Cooking 1.
Whiskey Cooking 2.
posted by spinifex23 at 11:48 PM on January 27, 2015

Please don't leave them on the curb -- you don't want kids picking them up.
posted by tracicle at 4:11 AM on January 28, 2015

Best answer: I feel your pain. In my cabinet I have two bottles of low grade blended whiskey from as far back as 1978. However Jameson is far better than the stuff I have. Some options: Cooking: substitute what you have in any recipe that calls for Bourbon. This page has 10 recipes that look easy enough. BBQ or Smoking: soak some oak or apple in the whiskey for smoking on the grill. In fact why not buy a whole bunch of chunk wood and soak it, dry it, and give it as gifts to friends who BBQ. Find a recipe and make some whiskey/ Bourbon based BBQ Sauces, also to give as gifts.
posted by Gungho at 7:07 AM on January 28, 2015

Best answer: It'd take you a while to go through two bottles one whiskey cake at a time, but think how happy you could make your neighbors, mail carrier, clients...
posted by lakeroon at 7:56 AM on January 28, 2015

Best answer: I was able to exchange unopened bottles at a locally owned liquor store. Exchanged an abundance of vodka gifted to my father for whiskey and bourbon. Perhaps you could switch yours for wine or beer to keep around that your friends would enjoy.
posted by 6ATR at 9:10 AM on January 28, 2015

Hi insoluble uncertainty, I know someone on the peninsula that would put them to good use, if you are still looking. Check your memail.
posted by puellaeterna at 9:17 AM on January 28, 2015

Put a bow on them and give them to the garbage men as an appreciation gift. Garbage men in some Phila neighborhoods get these kinds of things around teh holidays.
posted by WeekendJen at 1:55 PM on January 28, 2015 [1 favorite]

I would offer it to a homeless person who seemed like they'd appreciate it, esp given that you're in SF. But I'm not puritanical about that sort of thing.
posted by zutalors! at 5:35 PM on January 28, 2015

Response by poster: Thanks for all the answers. A kind mefite took them off my hands, and now I even have some recipes for the opened bottle that I didn't bother trying to give away. So glad I didn't have to pour them down the drain!
posted by insoluble uncertainty at 10:53 PM on January 29, 2015 [1 favorite]