Looking for resources on teaching consent

November 26, 2014 9:16 AM

I'm looking for resources, not just articles, about teaching "consent" and body awareness and boundaries for kids at all ages and stages.

Ideally, it would be great if it was in the form of a lesson plan or curricula. I'd really like to know specific ways to phrase the complicated social dance around "consent." I've started talking to my daughter about respecting other people when they don't want you to touch their bodies. And how she doesn't need to let anyone else touch her body if she doesn't want to. And that, even if she's wrestling with her friends, she should ask first. And when someone says, "stop," that you have to stop. I try to model that as well when we are rough-housing or tickling. If she says, "Stop!" I stop. Even if two seconds later she says, "more!" And I occasionally make a point of saying, "stop!" during rough-housing so that I can follow up with a little lesson about boundaries.

She's 4 and I have been thinking more and more about how this conversation matures and feeling a bit at a loss. I think it would be helpful for my friend group and for my husband to have a real resource that explains about teaching consent, bodily autonomy, respectfulness, etc..

posted by amanda to Education (7 answers total)

This blog post is quite moving. It inspired my own thoughts and work in early childhood with children 0-6. I hope it proves interesting and useful.
posted by maya at 9:27 AM on November 26, 2014 [3 favorites]

There's a kids book called My Body Is My Own which was on Oprah a few years ago. I thought the author had made a lesson plan for it but can't find the link now.
posted by spunweb at 10:24 AM on November 26, 2014

The Healthy Sex Talk: Teaching Kids Consent Ages 1-21 is not a curriculum, but it does at least provide concrete suggestions and talk about how to keep expanding the conversation as your kids grow up.
posted by jaguar at 10:25 AM on November 26, 2014 [1 favorite]

It's actually called My Body Belongs to Me. There's also a kids book called I Said No! about respecting others private parts.

Both have lesson plans for adults to do w kids, and a guide on talking about consent in a way that doesn't freak out the kid.
posted by spunweb at 10:26 AM on November 26, 2014 [2 favorites]

I'm not sure if it's exactly focused on what you're looking for, but I've heard lots of absolutely wonderful things about Kid Power (I know about it because it's run by a friend of a friend).
posted by you're a kitty! at 10:57 AM on November 26, 2014

The Canadian Red Cross has a well-regarded program called Be Safe!. It is aimed at kids 5-9 years old. There's an educators' kit for purchase, but there's also a free online course for parents. I'm not sure if you have to be in Canada to access it--it doesn't say you do, but you have to create an account.

From the course description:

Be Safe! is a personal safety program for children ages five to nine. This short information session provides parents and caregivers with high level information about the philosophy of Be Safe! and the contents of the new Be Safe! Kit. The Be Safe! kit includes everything needed to deliver the program in a positive, child-friendly and non-threatening way that incorporates cultural and family diversity.

“Keeping Our Kids Safe” is a handy downloadable booklet for parents which also offers great information on healthy relationships, technology safety and accessing supporting resources.

There's a prerequisite general overview course called RespectED that you have to take first, and it's also free.
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 11:18 AM on November 26, 2014 [1 favorite]

My first thought is using animals.. they are pretty good at communicating touches they love and hate.
posted by tanktop at 2:19 AM on November 27, 2014 [1 favorite]