A slight under-understanding of Tinder
June 3, 2014 9:08 AM

I am having trouble understanding how matches are formed. If I am bisexual and it shows me pictures of people of both genders, does that mean or imply those people are interested in people of my gender, or does it just randomly show men and women when both are selected? Is the pool of people I am shown a pool of people who already said they liked me first and then people who haven't been asked only after those people? Does it ever show me a picture of someone who has already specifically said they don't like me? And along the same lines, does it sometimes (as it seems) show me a bunch of people who haven't yet had the opportunity to thumbs up or thumbs down me, and if they do thumbs me up, will it then tell me and them we matched at the same time? Thank you. Postscript: Also - why so many matches and so few people initiating conversation?
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (5 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
Yes, it should show you only people who have indicated that they are into your gender. I'm a straight man, though, so I occasionally get pictures of men. I assume they have selected that they are a woman. I'm not entirely sure there.

And yes, someone has to rate first. Sometimes it's you, sometimes it's the other person. If someone has already given you a thumbs up and you then do the same, that's when you get the "You've Got a Match!" message. Otherwise you wait until the other person rates you...and if they give you a thumbs down, you never no.

As for so many matches, so few people initiating conversation, it seems that some people carpet bomb with likes and then do quality control afterwards. In other cases, it's both people staring at their phone wondering why the other person didn't say hi first.
posted by inturnaround at 9:27 AM on June 3, 2014


Well it *has* to show you people who haven't thumbs-upped you or thumbs-downed you yet, sometimes, because SOMEONE has to make the first move, right? If you thumbs-up someone who has already thumbs-upped you, you both get notified immediately (though the other person might not be on their phone right that second so they won't necessarily see it right away).

I don't know whether it shows you photos of people who have already turned you down; if I were engineering it, I might not bother showing you people who've already turned you down but if, say, you were a moderately attractive person, I would show you mostly moderately attractive people and a few super-hotties; I might not even bother showing your profile to those super-hotties.

I'm guessing they tweak the algorithms frequently. They want to keep you looking and swiping! So they need to give you fun, attractive profiles to look at but also presumably they want you to match up enough so that you don't feel ignored.
posted by mskyle at 9:35 AM on June 3, 2014


  1. if i am bisexual and it shows me pictures of people of both genders, does that mean or imply those people are interested in people of my gender, or does it just randomly show men and women when both are selected?
  2. You should be seeing people who are into your gender.
  3. is the pool of people i am shown a pool of people who already said they liked me first and then people who haven't been asked only after those people?
  4. It's a pool of people who already like you mixed with people who have not expressed a preference yet, as far as I can tell.
  5. does it ever show me a picture of someone who has already specifically said they don't like me?
  6. I don't know. I know I am shown photos all the time of people I've already turned down.
  7. and along the same lines, does it sometimes (as it seems) show me a bunch of people who haven't yet had the opportunity to thumbs up or thumbs down me, and if they do thumbs me up, will it then tell me and them we matched at the same time?
  8. basically whenever you match up, everyone gets notified.
  9. why so many matches and so few people initiating conversation?
  10. Same reason people pass up opportunities in person: Fear of rejection.

posted by Medieval Maven at 10:06 AM on June 3, 2014


anecdote: I have a male friend who uses tinder and recently figured out that he had somehow set his gender to female, so, that happens.
posted by dpx.mfx at 10:37 AM on June 3, 2014


1, It will only show you people who select that they like your gender.
2, Yes, people who like you come up first.
3, I don't know, I would think so though, people who you see again that you have already turned down have reset their account, and according to the system it is a new profile.
4, Yes it will show you people who have not seen you yet, if you say yes and they come along later and say yes you will be notified.
5, Tinder - It's just a numbers game, Say hi!
posted by krisb1701d at 2:39 AM on June 4, 2014


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