The Funky Mole Panic Dance
March 5, 2014 8:06 AM Subscribe
Browsing MetaFilter the other day, like normal, when I come across a link to this
. Interesting, informative read -- also: terrifying
. I've got tons of funky moles, and reading this jolted me into action. Long story short: I've booked an appointment with a Dermatologist, and now I can't get out my head. Please help me get out of my head.
So I've always been "moley." With my pale skin and Irish heritage, carrying around a constellation of moles has always been seen as the default in my family. As a teen, I even had a couple worrisome spots removed -- all coming back from the lab as benign, thankfully. After my teenage years, I kind of forgot about my skin entirely. The moles on my skin were just a genetic quirk, as far as I was concerned. Like the color of my hair or my height. I'm 31 now, and nothing's really changed. Same unsightly moles. Some are slightly irregular, but they've always been that way.
For whatever reason, though, reading the story linked to above paralyzed me with fear. What was a shrug on Monday has now become an obsessive fixation. I almost wish that I never clicked on the link, to be honest. Suffice it to say, I called up a local dermatologist and booked an appointment for this coming Monday. Now I'm just waiting. Studying my moles in the mirror and waiting. Pacing the floors and gnashing my teeth and ... waiting. "Is this melanoma?" I ask myself. "It looks like the pictures I've seen online."
Here's my question:
Do you have any strategies for dealing with crippling, soul-sucking Hypochondria? Everything else in my life has been "put on hold," so to speak, until I can get to the Doctor.
I know that I've done all that I can do at this point. I also understand that -- let's face it -- we're all terminal in the grand scheme of things. I get that. I've just never felt this kind of proximity to my own mortality. It's tough to process. Any thoughts/philosophies/stories from people who have been in a similar situation would be a balm to my soul right now. Thanks, everyone.