I'm unhappy, and I'm planning to leave this city as soon as I can get things straightened out.
I've been there a year, and it wasn't easy to get the job. I started out as a temp, and am now on my third temp contract with them. I don't get benefits, but they treat their employees well (ie: they paid me over the two-week holiday).
It's been a great learning experience, and I discovered the field of Communications, which I want to pursue. It's really been an ideal entry level job for me.
I started out as Administrative Assistant, and then when both the admin assistant and the Executive assistant quit, they told me I would be performing both functions (see my previous questions
). I was not really interested in the Executive assistant job, but I didn't have a choice. Now they still haven't hired another admin help person, and it's been 5 months. At first, I liked having both jobs because I felt valued by the organization, and I was never bored. But when crunch times come, I have trouble coping. I'm starting therapy soon.
I really do like the job and the environment, but I've been finding it hard to deal with all the uncertainty of the seemingly endless temp contracts. Plus, I have a very sensitive personality. I'm introverted and I need to be left alone in order to get my work done. Since I am the receptionist, that is not possible. I have been doing a good job of getting everything done on time, but my mental health is suffering. I tend to be a "giver" rather than a "taker". Which means, I always say yes when someone asks for help. And, I sacrifice my mental health in order to get the work done, but at the same time have a lot of trouble speaking up for myself.
Lastly, the HR lady is very abrasive and it's like a personality clash with me. Imagine a hockey defenceman (her) working with a lamb (me). Her office is right beside the reception desk so I have to interact with her all day long. Yes, I know I need to learn how to deal, but in this situation there is nothing I can do since she is in a much higher position than me. She seems to be trying to impose as much of her will on the organization as possible, so she has a lot of power. So in that case, speaking up for myself is a moot point because she will just impose her will either way. My actual supervisor rarely speaks to me because he is too busy, and I don't feel comfortable opening up to him.
I don't see this as a long term job like I once did, even though some aspects of it are so wonderful. One thing that is scaring me is they are making all the staff go on a retreat and stay in a hotel together for 24 hours. This is a nightmare for me, and seems like a total waste of money. That's taking place the third week of March. I'm also applying for grad school this year in a different city (the one I want to settle in).
I might be freaking out because I had a terrible day yesterday and called in sick today and feel guilty about that. The bad day was triggered by me having to organize lunch and take minutes for the senior staff meeting yesterday. Adding that on to my regular tasks pushed me over the edge, and I was unable to smile at the visiting staff members.
1) Should I quit before the retreat in March? It seems like the honest thing to do since the point of the retreat is to have some sort of "group therapy" session for staff, and if I don't intend to stay why would I participate?
On the other hand, it kind of sucks for me to have to quit early just for that reason. I need to save as much as I can before moving to another city and/ or going to grad school.
It seems like March would be a logical time to quit, but I don't know if I'll have time to find another job before then. So on the other hand, it seems like a stupid thing to quit in March.
For what it's worth, the current temp contract I'm on goes until April 31.
2) I really really ( ie with a burning passion- see my question
from 10 months ago) want to live in the other city. Trust me when I say that. I know what I want.
Is this a good enough reason to leave my job? Ie: when I go for my next job interview and they ask me "why are you leaving your current job", can I say: for the purposes of relocating to the city I intend to settle in?
Lastly, I foresee someone coming on here to tell me that one year is not long enough to stay in a job, and that because I'm from the Millenial generation, I can't commit to anything. I've already thought about that, and I see it in a different light. The more one commits oneself to things that are unfulfilling but safe, the easier it is to forget what fulfillment feels like. Please respect this point of view when you answer the question.
Also, please trust me when I say I've been putting my heart into this job. I don't want to give the impression that I'm trying to flake out on it.