Suggestions on how to forget forgetting?
December 13, 2013 11:48 AM Subscribe
I have a tendency to automatically dissociate from/"forget" things that are stressful or anxiety-provoking. How can I better focus on these scary things so that I can better address and resolve them?
posted by rhooke to Health & Fitness (11 answers total) 21 users marked this as a favorite
There are plenty of things that can cause stress in life, and somewhere along the line (in childhood, my therapist reasonably suggests) I learned some coping strategies that are not effective in resolving and thereby reducing said stress. As the short question outlined, when faced with a stressful situation or choice, my default approach seems to be to avoid it. This avoidance often takes the form of just... forgetting about the situation.
As you may imagine, this has wreaked no small amount of havoc in my life, making it difficult to pursue hobbies or my artistic practice (failure is stressful!), has impeded me furthering my career (rejection is scary!), and even disrupts my making important decisions and contributions in my relationship.
Through the aforementioned therapy and related introspection, I've come to understand some things about this strange phenomenon (how it developed, what purpose it served, and perhaps why it is self-perpetuating) but that doesn't provide me with much practical knowledge of how to improve it!
Other than further addressing this with my therapist and trying to keep lists and appointments in my calendar (though those are only useful if I remember to look at them!), does anyone have any suggestions as to how I might learn to put this harmful old strategy aside and thereby be better able to engage with the exciting and challenging parts of my life?