I'm so tired.
August 25, 2013 5:22 PM Subscribe
How do I improve my nutrition and overall well-being in these circumstances?
I'm a nursing mom to an 11 month old and a 23 month old. I'm the primary breadwinner in the family and don't have much available time off.
I don't get much sleep at night, I have an IUD that is causing me to bleed 3 weeks out of every month (which is not helping my milk supply) and finally, my baby has so many food allergies that my diet is very restricted (no milk, wheat, eggs, soy, nuts, shrimp, banana, coconut or beef, and we're still doing testing to determine the remaining allergy culprits).
I live an hour from the nearest city and decent medical care, so I've been having trouble getting time to see my midwife about the IUD issues, esp. given the time I have to take off to get my sons to their various doctor and allergist appointments.
I am EXHAUSTED. Bone weary. It's tough to stay on top of everything I need to get done, I am struggling to feed my family of 5 given the disparate tastes and allergy issues of everyone in the house, I am resorting to whatever junk food is available and contains the fewest allergens (I keep eating things with soy in them because it's damned near impossible to find prepackaged foods that don't contain it, even if they're allergy friendly in every other respect) and I'm mainlining caffeine even though the effects are minimal at this point.
I have found a couple of extremely helpful cookbooks and am slowly getting things together to make some allergy friendly meals ahead, but I keep falling off the wagon when it's the end of the day and I have hungry people demanding food. "Falling off the wagon" means whatever take out is minimally dangerous. I have some supplements but avoid my multivitamins because something in them (I think zinc) makes me nauseated.
What do I do to improve my health in this situation? Are there tests I need to ask my doctors about? What supplements are actually useful and not just junk? I need advice and I think I need to hear from someone who's been in a similar situation. My body has a lot of demands on it and I need to know how to fuel it.
I'm a nursing mom to an 11 month old and a 23 month old. I'm the primary breadwinner in the family and don't have much available time off.
I don't get much sleep at night, I have an IUD that is causing me to bleed 3 weeks out of every month (which is not helping my milk supply) and finally, my baby has so many food allergies that my diet is very restricted (no milk, wheat, eggs, soy, nuts, shrimp, banana, coconut or beef, and we're still doing testing to determine the remaining allergy culprits).
I live an hour from the nearest city and decent medical care, so I've been having trouble getting time to see my midwife about the IUD issues, esp. given the time I have to take off to get my sons to their various doctor and allergist appointments.
I am EXHAUSTED. Bone weary. It's tough to stay on top of everything I need to get done, I am struggling to feed my family of 5 given the disparate tastes and allergy issues of everyone in the house, I am resorting to whatever junk food is available and contains the fewest allergens (I keep eating things with soy in them because it's damned near impossible to find prepackaged foods that don't contain it, even if they're allergy friendly in every other respect) and I'm mainlining caffeine even though the effects are minimal at this point.
I have found a couple of extremely helpful cookbooks and am slowly getting things together to make some allergy friendly meals ahead, but I keep falling off the wagon when it's the end of the day and I have hungry people demanding food. "Falling off the wagon" means whatever take out is minimally dangerous. I have some supplements but avoid my multivitamins because something in them (I think zinc) makes me nauseated.
What do I do to improve my health in this situation? Are there tests I need to ask my doctors about? What supplements are actually useful and not just junk? I need advice and I think I need to hear from someone who's been in a similar situation. My body has a lot of demands on it and I need to know how to fuel it.
Response by poster: Baby wakes up 2-5x a night (I'd hoped he would sleep better after we eliminated so many foods from our diet, but no) and I live with their dad but he is not terribly helpful or supportive.
posted by annathea at 5:32 PM on August 25, 2013
posted by annathea at 5:32 PM on August 25, 2013
Do you have to nurse? If you are doing it primarily because of the health benefits for your kids, how much benefit are they really getting if you're not getting proper nutrition yourself? An 11-month old and a 23-month old don't even need formula -- you can go directly to milk for the 23-month old, and whatever the doctor recommends for your 11-month old.
If you're the primary breadwinner, you should enlist their dad to take them to all the appointments. Or if you have family around who you trust more, get them to go to the appointments. You can request that the doctor write up a summary of the recommendations.
For preparing family meals, maybe have a variety of things available (precut fresh vegetables and fruits, plain rice and pasta, cheese, some sauces?) rather than having everybody eat the same thing.
And you need to prioritize your own medical issues -- make that appointment about the IUD. Don't make the excuse that you're so busy with the kids that you can't take care of yourself. If you don't take care of yourself, who will be able to take care of them?
posted by chickenmagazine at 5:43 PM on August 25, 2013 [10 favorites]
If you're the primary breadwinner, you should enlist their dad to take them to all the appointments. Or if you have family around who you trust more, get them to go to the appointments. You can request that the doctor write up a summary of the recommendations.
For preparing family meals, maybe have a variety of things available (precut fresh vegetables and fruits, plain rice and pasta, cheese, some sauces?) rather than having everybody eat the same thing.
And you need to prioritize your own medical issues -- make that appointment about the IUD. Don't make the excuse that you're so busy with the kids that you can't take care of yourself. If you don't take care of yourself, who will be able to take care of them?
posted by chickenmagazine at 5:43 PM on August 25, 2013 [10 favorites]
Your health is a symptom, not a cause, of this situation. The real issue to me is that the father of your kids is not carrying his weight, and you are being both parents and breadwinner and can't anymore.
You are super woman, and I want to shout from the rooftops about how awesome you are. This is one of those instances where you need to put your oxygen mask on first so your children can get what they need, because at this rate you're going to burn out and then you'll be in more dire straights than you are now. And it won't be your fault! So I say that your partner needs to get with it, or maybe even get out and send you substantial child support so you can afford a nanny to help you with your load. Do you have it in you to fight the father of your children for the support he owes you and your kids? Or could you write back and elaborate on the nature of your relationship with this guy and let us know what you're working with?
posted by These Birds of a Feather at 5:46 PM on August 25, 2013 [13 favorites]
You are super woman, and I want to shout from the rooftops about how awesome you are. This is one of those instances where you need to put your oxygen mask on first so your children can get what they need, because at this rate you're going to burn out and then you'll be in more dire straights than you are now. And it won't be your fault! So I say that your partner needs to get with it, or maybe even get out and send you substantial child support so you can afford a nanny to help you with your load. Do you have it in you to fight the father of your children for the support he owes you and your kids? Or could you write back and elaborate on the nature of your relationship with this guy and let us know what you're working with?
posted by These Birds of a Feather at 5:46 PM on August 25, 2013 [13 favorites]
If it helps, it's likely the iron in your multi making you nauseous. You can get multivitamins without iron. On the other hand, if you're bleeding three weeks out of four, you probably desperately need iron to keep from feeling fatigued. If you make it to the doctor/midwife (and you should!) ask for blood tests as well-- it will let you know what vitamins and minerals you're low on. With a restricted diet, lots of blood loss, and poor sleep, it would be amazing if you *weren't* fatigued. I am definitely in favor of breastfeeding, but I think this might be a really good time to evaluate the health of your whole family, and think about whether there's an alternative solution that will help all of you to a healthier place.
posted by instamatic at 5:55 PM on August 25, 2013
posted by instamatic at 5:55 PM on August 25, 2013
Yeah, props for being so bad-assed.
I've recently been planning on trying out buckwheat galletes (like crêpes) and I haven't gotten around to it yet but I noticed that the package of buckwheat flour (which is not actually a kind of wheat, that's just the name) says that it's gluten-free, so maybe that will fit your no-wheat requirement? The internet makes it sound like nearly any sort of filling is fine and they're eaten with anything from savory to sweet... so I figure it will be a good way to get rid of leftovers for me, and perhaps something that will be flexible enough to accommodate your dietary restrictions while still satisfying the rest of your family.
posted by XMLicious at 5:58 PM on August 25, 2013
I've recently been planning on trying out buckwheat galletes (like crêpes) and I haven't gotten around to it yet but I noticed that the package of buckwheat flour (which is not actually a kind of wheat, that's just the name) says that it's gluten-free, so maybe that will fit your no-wheat requirement? The internet makes it sound like nearly any sort of filling is fine and they're eaten with anything from savory to sweet... so I figure it will be a good way to get rid of leftovers for me, and perhaps something that will be flexible enough to accommodate your dietary restrictions while still satisfying the rest of your family.
posted by XMLicious at 5:58 PM on August 25, 2013
Response by poster: Not to threadsit, but I'm not nursing the 23 month old anymore, and given the nature of his allergies it IS important that I continue nursing the 11 month old for as long as possible (hence the AskMe - I would stop nursing if I felt it would help, but for his health I need to continue).
posted by annathea at 6:04 PM on August 25, 2013
posted by annathea at 6:04 PM on August 25, 2013
When you say you're trying to satisfy everyone's allergies and tastes, do you mean you're making separate allergenic and non-allergenic meals? If so, would it be easier to simply make everything with the appropriate allergy restrictions, and everyone who doesn't like it can deal?
There's you, dad, the two babies, who is the fifth person? Are they old enough to start helping you with tasks?
Dad really needs to get in line. I don't know what the relationship is between the two of you, but if there is one it's time for a Come-to-Jesus moment. If there isn't one, then it's worth asking what he's contributing to the household and whether things would be easier without him.
posted by Anonymous at 6:49 PM on August 25, 2013
There's you, dad, the two babies, who is the fifth person? Are they old enough to start helping you with tasks?
Dad really needs to get in line. I don't know what the relationship is between the two of you, but if there is one it's time for a Come-to-Jesus moment. If there isn't one, then it's worth asking what he's contributing to the household and whether things would be easier without him.
posted by Anonymous at 6:49 PM on August 25, 2013
Best answer: Have you considered:
- Get a crock pot, and make a huge batch of beans every weekend - soak them on Thursday or Friday night, rinse and cook them the next day; it's actually fine to add salt when you start them cooking. Consider using nutritional yeast (more vitamins) if that's within your diet.;
- Get a big rice cooker, and make a huge batch of rice to go with that, brown, white, basmati, wild, whatever. I love the wild rice blend one can sometimes find in bulk;
- Roast a bunch of whole beets (full of iron) on a big cookie sheet on the weekend (you can just wash them, poke them with a fork, then stick them in the oven until they're done, like potatoes). After roasting them (this will be messy), let them cool, then slip off the outer skins. Slice and put in containers to eat later. Bonus points if you can put some kind of citrus in with them, like orange slices - the citric acid helps with iron absorption.
Get a week's worth of individual containers, and put a meal's worth of rice and beans _together_ in the containers, possibly with some spinach.
Huge batch of food, inexpensive, filling, (full compliment of amino acids), easy to reheat. You can eat the beets cold if you want.
You'll probably have more energy if you can wean yourself off the caffeine (I realize this is impossible, but I thought I'd mention it). Some caffeinated drinks can impede the absorption of vitamins, also.
--
Re: vitamins - You might absorb them better if you take them separately rather than all together in one big multivatimin. Not a vitamin expert, but maybe worth looking into if you have a chance.
Old wisdom = be careful not to take too much iron. New wisdom = only a few people have the hereditary condition that makes them at risk for iron poisoning. Ask your Dr. about this if you haven't heard it before.
posted by amtho at 6:52 PM on August 25, 2013 [1 favorite]
- Get a crock pot, and make a huge batch of beans every weekend - soak them on Thursday or Friday night, rinse and cook them the next day; it's actually fine to add salt when you start them cooking. Consider using nutritional yeast (more vitamins) if that's within your diet.;
- Get a big rice cooker, and make a huge batch of rice to go with that, brown, white, basmati, wild, whatever. I love the wild rice blend one can sometimes find in bulk;
- Roast a bunch of whole beets (full of iron) on a big cookie sheet on the weekend (you can just wash them, poke them with a fork, then stick them in the oven until they're done, like potatoes). After roasting them (this will be messy), let them cool, then slip off the outer skins. Slice and put in containers to eat later. Bonus points if you can put some kind of citrus in with them, like orange slices - the citric acid helps with iron absorption.
Get a week's worth of individual containers, and put a meal's worth of rice and beans _together_ in the containers, possibly with some spinach.
Huge batch of food, inexpensive, filling, (full compliment of amino acids), easy to reheat. You can eat the beets cold if you want.
You'll probably have more energy if you can wean yourself off the caffeine (I realize this is impossible, but I thought I'd mention it). Some caffeinated drinks can impede the absorption of vitamins, also.
--
Re: vitamins - You might absorb them better if you take them separately rather than all together in one big multivatimin. Not a vitamin expert, but maybe worth looking into if you have a chance.
Old wisdom = be careful not to take too much iron. New wisdom = only a few people have the hereditary condition that makes them at risk for iron poisoning. Ask your Dr. about this if you haven't heard it before.
posted by amtho at 6:52 PM on August 25, 2013 [1 favorite]
Best answer: IANAD but it sounds like you may be anemic from the bleeding. This happened to me and I remember that bone-tired weariness too well - and I didn't have two babies and an unhelpful partner to deal with!
Seconding what someone said above about iron - the pills made me nauseous when I first started taking them, but it got better after a few days. Taking them with food helped.
One thing about dietary sources of iron - the iron in vegetables (ie, leafy greens) is not very bio-available. Greens are fine as a source of iron if you're healthy, but if you are anemic, you'll be much better off with sources from animal protein (in addition to pills, of course). Chicken (especially dark meat) is almost as good a source of iron as beef, and if you can stomach chicken liver, it's the best.
Can you get the dad to watch the kids for a few hours while you go to the doctor (not the midwife, unless she's acting as your OB-GYN?)? If that's out of the question, what about a friend or a babysitter? I agree with the others that it sounds like there are other issues here, but it's going to be hard to deal with anything else until you get your health sorted out. If you are anemic, you should be able to get at least one cause of the exhaustion sorted out fairly easily by taking iron pills and figuring out another form of BC.
posted by lunasol at 7:02 PM on August 25, 2013 [1 favorite]
Seconding what someone said above about iron - the pills made me nauseous when I first started taking them, but it got better after a few days. Taking them with food helped.
One thing about dietary sources of iron - the iron in vegetables (ie, leafy greens) is not very bio-available. Greens are fine as a source of iron if you're healthy, but if you are anemic, you'll be much better off with sources from animal protein (in addition to pills, of course). Chicken (especially dark meat) is almost as good a source of iron as beef, and if you can stomach chicken liver, it's the best.
Can you get the dad to watch the kids for a few hours while you go to the doctor (not the midwife, unless she's acting as your OB-GYN?)? If that's out of the question, what about a friend or a babysitter? I agree with the others that it sounds like there are other issues here, but it's going to be hard to deal with anything else until you get your health sorted out. If you are anemic, you should be able to get at least one cause of the exhaustion sorted out fairly easily by taking iron pills and figuring out another form of BC.
posted by lunasol at 7:02 PM on August 25, 2013 [1 favorite]
I found that taking vitamins at night helped with the nausea.
posted by maxg94 at 7:19 PM on August 25, 2013
posted by maxg94 at 7:19 PM on August 25, 2013
Caffeine binds to iron and significantly reduces absorption for many people (I am routinely rejected for blood donation if I have my morning coffee, despite not being anemic in general.) My only other suggestion is if you have a church or community center in your area-- see if there's a mothers' group or childcare pool. Someone from a local support group would at least be able to watch the kids while you go to an appointment, and some people trade dinners or lunches (you feed the entire group's kids on Wednesday, someone else takes them the rest of the week.) Trickier with allergies but still feasible.
posted by blnkfrnk at 8:23 PM on August 25, 2013 [2 favorites]
posted by blnkfrnk at 8:23 PM on August 25, 2013 [2 favorites]
Best answer: Okay. You are amazing. So amazing.
You shouldn't have to do this all by yourself, though, and if your partner isn't helping you, say, put the baby back to sleep at night, then he needs to step up. It's totally reasonable of you to expect that he clean, cook, and take the kids to appointments. I see from your previous questions that the fifth person in your house is likely your 4 year old stepson. Girl, no wonder you are exhausted.
Would it be possible to throw some money at this problem? Maybe you could get a professional cleaner to take some of the chore load off, or a babysitter so that you can get some peace. Maybe you can hire someone to cook some allergen-free meals. I know that sometimes self-care feels less important than, well, everything, but you truly cannot be the best parent while you're not at your best self.
Please go see the doc about that IUD as soon as possible, and have a frank talk with them about how you're feeling. But really, I think the solution to your problem is to slow down. Your body is telling you that this pace is unsustainable.
posted by woodvine at 8:36 PM on August 25, 2013
You shouldn't have to do this all by yourself, though, and if your partner isn't helping you, say, put the baby back to sleep at night, then he needs to step up. It's totally reasonable of you to expect that he clean, cook, and take the kids to appointments. I see from your previous questions that the fifth person in your house is likely your 4 year old stepson. Girl, no wonder you are exhausted.
Would it be possible to throw some money at this problem? Maybe you could get a professional cleaner to take some of the chore load off, or a babysitter so that you can get some peace. Maybe you can hire someone to cook some allergen-free meals. I know that sometimes self-care feels less important than, well, everything, but you truly cannot be the best parent while you're not at your best self.
Please go see the doc about that IUD as soon as possible, and have a frank talk with them about how you're feeling. But really, I think the solution to your problem is to slow down. Your body is telling you that this pace is unsustainable.
posted by woodvine at 8:36 PM on August 25, 2013
Get the IUD out. Soonest. Someone in my life had one in, and it was a counterfeit, and it caused MASSIVE HEALTH PROBLEMS. Try again in a year or so when the kid is off the milk.
posted by Slap*Happy at 8:43 PM on August 25, 2013 [1 favorite]
posted by Slap*Happy at 8:43 PM on August 25, 2013 [1 favorite]
Go to the doctor, tell her/him your symptoms, and have some blood tests done to check for iron-deficient anemia, thyroid problems, etc.
posted by Jacqueline at 10:16 PM on August 25, 2013
posted by Jacqueline at 10:16 PM on August 25, 2013
Just reading your post made ME tired, but thinking about anything else that could be making you more tired... have you had your thyroid levels checked?
posted by CrazyLemonade at 10:32 PM on August 25, 2013
posted by CrazyLemonade at 10:32 PM on August 25, 2013
Best answer: Uggh. I feel for you. I'm a breastfeeding mama to a 24-month-old with multiple food intolerances. I had blood tests done recently for vitamins and minerals, thyroid etc. and came up low in calcium (dairy-free), magnesium, and iron stores. Supplementing now, but it's taking weeks to recover, and getting no better sleep in the meantime. Hubby has food intolerances too, so we just make the whole house a nut-, dairy-, nightshades-, strawberry- free space (sounds so simple when stated like that, huh!). I have a small store of dark chocolate handy for cravings; and chai prepared using rice milk for beverage requirements. Some unperishables like rice snacks kept in the cupboard for when cooking is too much. I've started making soups from scratch (Southern hemisphere = wintertime here), and freezing them in batches. There is literally 1 meal in our tourist town that's made in a restaurant (chicken curry of all things) that covers all allergy bases - so that's my other go-to when cooking gets too much. What I have learned is that the more well-cared-for mama (me) is = much smoother day all round for everyone; but it's hard to remember, and even harder to enforce.
posted by metaphorical at 10:40 PM on August 25, 2013
posted by metaphorical at 10:40 PM on August 25, 2013
If you have some spare cash, getting a professional cook (or just a really good friend who can cook well and gets your allergy issues) to first cook you two weeks worth of meals by your guidelines and put a bunch in your freezer for emergency days, then put together maybe 20 solid dinner recipes that work on your nutritional restrictions. My family does vegan fasting twice a week for religious reasons, and it was super annoying until we built up a bunch of good easy vegan recipes everyone liked. I know it sounds boring, but if you have 20 good recipes, you can rotate often enough that you'll be looking forward to the next time Curried Pumpkin Soup comes round. Put them on your phone or write them on a laminated index card with the shopping list on the back so you can grab a couple to go to the market.
And I know moms in your shoes who have weaned their kids. There are great allergy-friendly formulas out there for 11 month olds. If you really need breastmilk, you could look for a breastmilk bank or someone else with allergies who is nursing and would be willing to donate to your child.
You need at least one good night's sleep every week. I know how hard that is with toddlers, but at least once a week should be doable. I got my husband to do night feeds once a week while I slept in, sometimes in another room so I couldn't hear her yelling for me.
Find things to drop. Paper plates and cups instead of washing dishes. Let your garden go to seed. Give up on reading books and only watch sitcoms. Baby gets an hour of Elmo every evening. Cut corners on as much as you can opt out of so you have time to go for walks, eat decent food and sleep and recover from exhaustion.
posted by viggorlijah at 6:41 AM on August 26, 2013
And I know moms in your shoes who have weaned their kids. There are great allergy-friendly formulas out there for 11 month olds. If you really need breastmilk, you could look for a breastmilk bank or someone else with allergies who is nursing and would be willing to donate to your child.
You need at least one good night's sleep every week. I know how hard that is with toddlers, but at least once a week should be doable. I got my husband to do night feeds once a week while I slept in, sometimes in another room so I couldn't hear her yelling for me.
Find things to drop. Paper plates and cups instead of washing dishes. Let your garden go to seed. Give up on reading books and only watch sitcoms. Baby gets an hour of Elmo every evening. Cut corners on as much as you can opt out of so you have time to go for walks, eat decent food and sleep and recover from exhaustion.
posted by viggorlijah at 6:41 AM on August 26, 2013
Best answer: I had to eliminate wheat, dairy and soy while breastfeeding, so I know a little bit of where you are. It is crazy hard. My go-to tips:
- oatmeal.
- tacos for all. rice, beans, chicken/lamb/turkey/pork, cut vegetables, cheese for the non allergic. corn tacos or just in a bowl.
- chicken soup with rice.
- chicken salad with no-soy mayo.
But my best tip of all is SOAP.COM. Especially their "Vine" division. You can order your diapers, paper towels, soap, etc... and tons of specialty groceries like rice pasta, no-additive sauce, the aforementioned no-soy mayo and other dressings, cereals, granola bars, rice milk, canned beans, etc. Free shipping after $35, and the prices are good for my area.
posted by xo at 8:13 AM on August 26, 2013
- oatmeal.
- tacos for all. rice, beans, chicken/lamb/turkey/pork, cut vegetables, cheese for the non allergic. corn tacos or just in a bowl.
- chicken soup with rice.
- chicken salad with no-soy mayo.
But my best tip of all is SOAP.COM. Especially their "Vine" division. You can order your diapers, paper towels, soap, etc... and tons of specialty groceries like rice pasta, no-additive sauce, the aforementioned no-soy mayo and other dressings, cereals, granola bars, rice milk, canned beans, etc. Free shipping after $35, and the prices are good for my area.
posted by xo at 8:13 AM on August 26, 2013
Best answer: The best thing to improve your health will be to get help with child care, whether that's from your kids' dad, other family, or good friends. This is so you can find time to see a doctor about all the blood you are losing. While there, you can also ask to have your iron levels tested, or if there's anything else they should look at that would explain your level of exhaustion, beyond the fact that you're working several jobs.
On the food front, are you getting enough yourself? I lost too much weight when I was nursing and it took a bit to be at a healthy weight again. Try to put more oil or salad dressing on things you're eating, to make sure you're getting enough calories for energy and nursing. (And I don't know how affordable it is for you, but the grocery store sells a few kinds of cooked chicken and turkey, slices, strips, whole. I like it crumbled onto salad mix from the store.
Short list of the more calorie rich things you can eat in the hopes that some of it is inspiring:
chicken, turkey, pork, beans, hummus, rice, dried fruit, avocados, sunflower seeds, sunflower "butter", goat or sheep cheese?
Oatmeal might be a nice breakfast (I usually make some on the weekend and reheat on weekday mornings). If you want help brainstorming meal ideas, I'm happy to play by memail. (There are a lot of food restrictions in my extended family, so I do this often.)
posted by Margalo Epps at 3:53 PM on August 26, 2013
On the food front, are you getting enough yourself? I lost too much weight when I was nursing and it took a bit to be at a healthy weight again. Try to put more oil or salad dressing on things you're eating, to make sure you're getting enough calories for energy and nursing. (And I don't know how affordable it is for you, but the grocery store sells a few kinds of cooked chicken and turkey, slices, strips, whole. I like it crumbled onto salad mix from the store.
Short list of the more calorie rich things you can eat in the hopes that some of it is inspiring:
chicken, turkey, pork, beans, hummus, rice, dried fruit, avocados, sunflower seeds, sunflower "butter", goat or sheep cheese?
Oatmeal might be a nice breakfast (I usually make some on the weekend and reheat on weekday mornings). If you want help brainstorming meal ideas, I'm happy to play by memail. (There are a lot of food restrictions in my extended family, so I do this often.)
posted by Margalo Epps at 3:53 PM on August 26, 2013
Response by poster: I'm about to mark this as resolved, you all were enormously helpful and I've basically narrowed down the extremeness of this fatigue to anemia (with your help!). Thank you so much for your responses when I was in a very dark spot and wondering if I'd ever feel okay again.
posted by annathea at 12:15 PM on September 26, 2013 [1 favorite]
posted by annathea at 12:15 PM on September 26, 2013 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: Since this is still open, I wanted to post a follow-up almost one year on: I quit my full-time job last November and moved out of my ex's house in February. Youngest boy is still nursing 2x a day but steadily weaning, and only waking 1-2x a night. I found an amazing nanny in March and she has transformed my life. I used up my savings to take time off to be with my boys and work on a side business, then found a good job with remote hours last month.
I'm carrying a lot of extra weight from all the stress of the past two years but life has been steadily improving and I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. The boys are happy and healthy and I'm definitely happy! Working on healthy. Thank you all so much, I have re-read this thread so many times, esp. in those first few days after I moved out when we were stuck in a motel in the dead of winter trying to find a house to rent on short notice. Metafilter is amazing.
posted by annathea at 6:46 PM on July 23, 2014 [5 favorites]
I'm carrying a lot of extra weight from all the stress of the past two years but life has been steadily improving and I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. The boys are happy and healthy and I'm definitely happy! Working on healthy. Thank you all so much, I have re-read this thread so many times, esp. in those first few days after I moved out when we were stuck in a motel in the dead of winter trying to find a house to rent on short notice. Metafilter is amazing.
posted by annathea at 6:46 PM on July 23, 2014 [5 favorites]
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posted by decathecting at 5:28 PM on August 25, 2013