Acne scarring and online dating
February 27, 2013 5:27 PM Subscribe
It doesn't show up in pictures. I don't want to make a big deal out of it, but don't want it to seem like I'm trying to hide something. What should I do?
posted by mermily to human relations (25 answers total) 5 users marked this as a favorite
I have some acne scarring, which I would call mild but noticeable maybe? This will sound weird, but I don't feel like I have a solid objective opinion of how pronounced it is - I feel like a basically attractive person depending on the given person's taste, but I wonder if my scars are much more obvious than I feel they are when I look in the mirror. Like maybe I sort of edit them out? Anyway, this is part of the problem in deciding how much to disclose about it; I'm not sure how bad it is.
Anyway, it doesn't appear in much of any photo, except maybe if I were to take one 4 inches from my cheek with my head tilted toward the light. I signed up for an online dating website and unexpectedly met someone I seem to really click with on the online sense anyway and who seems into everything. It seems we have a similar sense of the world and I'm excited to meet him. I've tried to be honest in my photos and my weight, etc. is accurate but I'm not sure if he'll be turned off because of my skin. To a certain degree, I feel it wouldn't be the end of the world if he just had a taste for someone with nicer skin, but what I worry about is someone feeling that I was deliberately trying to deceive them, or hide something about my appearance. I really like and respect the person from what I know of him so far. The idea of writing something about my skin in my profile crossed my mind, but I feel like whenever you put a big "hey you should know this about me!" thing like that out there, it makes it into even a bigger deal than what it is?
I hadn't actually thought too much about it until we decided to meet a few days ago, and now I'm feeling a bit finicky. Anyway, has anyone dealt with this issue? Have you met someone and been disappointed in this, or have you decided to mention it or not mention it beforehand? I just wanted to see if I could get some feedback.