How can I become a better progressive?
February 15, 2013 4:45 PM Subscribe
I am not as good of a person as I would like to be. Is there anything like a social justice life coach to help me figure out how? Probably not. I don't want a therapist, because even though I hate myself, I want to be a better person rather than a happier one. Plus, and this is why I need to not talk to my friends about it, it's really gross to whine about how it's so hard for me as a privileged person to deal with the fact that I can never be a good or trustworthy friend. I read a lot of blogs, and while I have improved, I also cry over what a worthless creep I am and that is gross, useless and also no fun either. Not terrible like actually suffering, but I don't like it and it interferes with my ability to have friends what with how annoying I am. So: no life coach ( I think), no bothering friends, blogs aren't perfect, what do I do?
posted by WhathaveIdonenow? to Human Relations (34 answers total) 13 users marked this as a favorite
For instance, even though I have become more liberal over time, the rest of the world has become more liberal more quickly. I thought for quite a while that it was good that I was a feminist and supported gay marriage. With feminism's history of racism and transphobia, can I really call myself a feminist without essentially telling trans people and POC that I don't care about them? One of the things I struggle with the most is a quote saying that gay marriage is a form of racism. Every person I have showed it to agreed, even white lesbians. Now, I don't think that gay marriage is the most important issue facing the GLBT community, never did, but I can't bring myself to believe it's wrong for married gays to appear or be portrayed in public, even if other forms of love are just as valid. I always get stuck on "but such and such isn't inherently bad, it's just over-represented". And I can see the problems with that outlook, but I STILL can't be disgusted at married gays for being hegemonic, and I feel that I need to. I do romanticize marriage a bit, even if it's not at all for me. And I feel like I'm not part of the GLBT community (is it okay to call it that? That doesn't cover everything) because even though I always thought I was bisexual, I am straight-leaning and don't date. I think when I first realized it, that made me bi, but now it just makes me straight and ugly.
TL;DR: I used to think I was a pretty good person but now I feel like Rush Limbaugh or something. And even though it's gross for a privileged privileged princess to whine about how haaaarrrd it is to be a terrible white bitch, I hate myself and I don't want to hurt anyone. These are some of the people I care about the most.
I know how annoying I am and that's why I didn't send this in an e-mail to someone I know.