Feel like I'm going to lose my marbles!
November 2, 2012 2:28 PM Subscribe
How do I plan for or learn to cope with huge changes in my life this year that include graduating university, getting married, moving cross country? (sorry long!!)
posted by snowysoul to human relations (3 answers total) 3 users marked this as a favorite
I'm in a time of what feels like (and is!!) huge transition and its leaving me anxious and feeling extremely unsettled with what's next I'm finally in the last year of my studies at university in Environmental science and indigenous studies and will be graduating in the spring", "and getting married about 2 weeks after I graduate in May. Due to the job market where we live now in Ontario for my partner D (he's trained as a teacher) and the fact that I love the Arctic we're thinking of moving to the NWT, Yukon, Nunavut or other northern region where we could both hopefully find work. I specialized with a scientific background and skillset that includes working with Indigenous communities on research and environmental issues.
I'm struggling to figure out what I need to do to make this all happen, with wedding planning, finding a job, and other things on top of a full time school schedule while retaining some amount of sanity! My partner is fully supportive of me and my anxiety, and has been great about making sure the things we need to do get done (especially with wedding planning). We've both been upfront that this is something that we are doing together and planning together as a team (which is frustrating when family and friends like to pester ME about wedding planning and assume he's not a part of the process). We both have agreed that moving is the best thing for us, finding a teaching job in Southern Ontario right now is next to impossible and we both have significant student loans that would make it difficult to stick around here and wait for the slim possibility of D getting onto a supply list.
I just started working with a therapist on CBT.
Trying to find work is tough, I don't exactly know where we would like to go and I'm really not sure when I should be starting to apply for jobs when I won't be available till June. On top of that, we're both trying to find work somewhere that would suit us both (with some comprise), but I'm worried one of us will find a great job and the other won't be able to find work at all or won't find what I'm interested in pursuing as a career.
I'm really struggling to feel engaged in life and stay the course as it is when everything seems to be changing and moving. I really just would like to be finished with school, start working and moving on with the next thing. On the other hand, the idea of moving far away from my support networks and best friends is terrifying. I'm having a really hard time with it now, and am worried with how I will cope with things as my last year comes to an end.
So my question is, do you have any advice on how I better cope with this huge amounts of changes without losing all my sanity? Is there anyway I could plan for next year (I'm a planner, D is definitely not). How do I stay engaged and grounded in my life here as it is now while at the same time trying to figure out what to do next? Any advice, stories, or resources would be greatly appreciated. I oscillate between being happy and excited about getting married, wanting to rip my hair out with stress, and crying.
tl;dr: I'm graduating university in the spring, getting married and then moving cross country and am having trouble coping with it all with my anxiety disorder. What can I do to cope better?