Do I throw away a half-bottle of maple syrup?

May 10, 2012 2:08 PM

Throw away or keep? A Maple Syrup love story.

Hey all,

My boyfriend and I broke up about two weeks ago. It was a mutual breakup, no hard feelings, slight sadness, but the overall knowledge that this was the right decision for us (it was a long distance relationship for a while). Anyway, I kept a bottle of Log Cabin pancake syrup for when we'd make pancakes for breakfast during his weekend visits (this is not a euphemism). He prefers the fake stuff over the real, grade A Vermont Maple Syrup that I savor on my pancakes! So, as such, I have about half a bottle left and am not sure what to do with it (save throwing it in the garbage). Part of me is saying. "But what if someday we get back together and he wants pancakes and I've thrown away perfectly good Log Cabin syrup???" The other part of me says, "omg, throw it away, psycho."

Thoughts?

L

posted by LemonGardot to human relations (26 answers total)

"omg, throw it away, psycho."
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 2:09 PM on May 10, 2012 [47 favorites]

Throw it.
posted by mleigh at 2:10 PM on May 10, 2012

Host a pancake brunch for some Log Cabin syrup-loving friends?
posted by cranberrymonger at 2:14 PM on May 10, 2012 [1 favorite]

When you throw it away, do it in a ceremonious manner.
posted by wryly at 2:15 PM on May 10, 2012

Because there's really no such thing as "perfectly good Log Cabin syrup" and its only possible use is in the unlikely event that you get back together with your boyfriend and he comes over for a weekend visit and he craves pancakes, you should throw it away, you psycho.

I mean, what, is this like the last bottle of Log Cabin syrup on the planet or something? If you need more, get more. Right now it's just taking up space in your fridge, mind, and heart.
posted by MoonOrb at 2:18 PM on May 10, 2012 [3 favorites]

If you do get back together, think how exciting it will be to go to the store and buy some more of his favorite syrup. Throw it out.
posted by Rock Steady at 2:19 PM on May 10, 2012 [1 favorite]

'tis thrown! Thanks, friends :).
posted by LemonGardot at 2:24 PM on May 10, 2012 [3 favorites]

He prefers the fake stuff over the real, grade A Vermont Maple Syrup that I savor on my pancakes!

Many would argue you should throw both out and get grade B syrup, as it's the truly good stuff.
posted by cjorgensen at 2:25 PM on May 10, 2012 [18 favorites]

Toss it. If you get back together, you can renew the awesomeness of the relationship with a spiffy new bottle of syrup.

The other option is to throw a pancake brunch soon.
posted by rmd1023 at 2:25 PM on May 10, 2012

He prefers the fake stuff over the real, grade A Vermont Maple Syrup that I savor on my pancakes!

I see you've already made your decision, but I was going to urge you to throw it out, and console yourself with the knowledge that your taste is far superior to his.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 2:26 PM on May 10, 2012 [1 favorite]

You know what? Keep it in the fridge for a while. Just because "throw it away" is so clearly the answer here that I feel like you're not really ready to hear it. That's OK, though, it's just one condiment. If you need to hang onto it for awhile for sentimental reasons, just do it. Then throw it away, because gross.
posted by emumimic at 2:27 PM on May 10, 2012 [1 favorite]

Well, look at it like this: if if if you ever were to get back together, you would not want to start it with the emotional equivalent of a half-empty and stale bottle of Log Cabin syrup that had been hiding in the back of the pantry. New start, new pancakes, new syrup.

In the more likely scenario, you'd be letting stale syrup from an old relationship take up room in your house and life.
posted by Uniformitarianism Now! at 2:28 PM on May 10, 2012 [2 favorites]

I've actually done research on this, and as a matter of fact there is no such thing as "perfectly good" Log Cabin syrup. It's all HFCS and related (depending on the variety); I don't even think they make a single variety with actual maple syrup. It's garbage, pace those who prefer it.
posted by rhizome at 2:28 PM on May 10, 2012 [1 favorite]

Just drink the maple syrup, you fool.
posted by dekathelon at 2:29 PM on May 10, 2012 [2 favorites]

Make muffins, then throw them at him!

Seriously, though, make muffins, and share them with friends.
posted by spunweb at 3:01 PM on May 10, 2012 [3 favorites]

Step 1. Throw out Log Cabin syrup.

Step 2. Finish Grade A maple syrup, 'cause you're not made of money.

Step 3. Replace with Grade B maple syrup, which is actually better (read: more maple-y goodness) despite the confusing grade--which refers to its old skool use as a substitute for white sugar, and hence "lower" grades are actually more flavorful.

Step 4. PANCAKES!
posted by iminurmefi at 3:18 PM on May 10, 2012 [6 favorites]

"But what if someday we get back together and he wants pancakes and I've thrown away perfectly good Log Cabin syrup???"

Honey, no.
posted by i_am_a_fiesta at 3:31 PM on May 10, 2012 [12 favorites]

grade b is better than grade a. weird, i know, but that's how it is.
posted by mantid at 4:50 PM on May 10, 2012

Throw it away to a soundtrack of this song, or similar.

Then, yes, buy some Grade B syrup and don't look back!
posted by apricot at 4:52 PM on May 10, 2012 [1 favorite]

Burn it in a bonfire.
posted by easy, lucky, free at 5:43 PM on May 10, 2012

Get rid of the fake syrup. I highly doubt it costs that much money. He can buy another bottle of Log Cabin maple syrup. And, if the possibility of ever getting back together becomes reality, then you can buy another bottle of maple syrup. It's not like it's gold or something!

But, if you have any of his other belongings then I'd suggest putting them in a box and mailing them to his place.
posted by livinglearning at 5:57 PM on May 10, 2012

But what if someday we get back together and he wants pancakes and I've thrown away perfectly good Log Cabin syrup?

I suppose you'll be out a couple bucks and someone will need to swing by Save-a-lot for a new bottle?
posted by pecanpies at 6:06 PM on May 10, 2012

Make your own fake stuff if you need it again. It's a simple syrup with artificial maple flavoring added.
posted by COD at 6:24 PM on May 10, 2012

grade b is better than grade a. weird, i know, but that's how it is.

Grade B is more concentrated than grade A. I don't think that makes it "better"; each is better suited to particular applications.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 7:27 PM on May 10, 2012

Are you hoping to get back together? Maybe my life is a little too much like a notorious Alanis Morissette song, but I think you're more likely to get back together if you do throw away the Log Cabin Syrup.

Also Log Cabin Syrup is disgusting.
posted by telegraph at 8:11 PM on May 10, 2012

Hi, I'm the person who comes in to point out that this wasn't really about the syrup. This is about being aware that all thoughts that start with "but what if someday we get back together" are counterproductive. Congratulations on making baby steps towards moving on.
posted by nanojath at 8:50 PM on May 10, 2012 [3 favorites]