Seeking Info on a Simple But Complicated Process
March 1, 2012 12:21 PM Subscribe
What are some good resources, forums, practical information, and general discussion about pursuing artificial insemination?
I am seriously considering this route, and it is of course a complicated course of action. I am curious about cost (of insemination-related procedures, rather than general healthcare), the methods of finding a highly-educated donor (and whether the cost would be too prohibitive), experiences of single mothers who chose this path, etc. I want to do my research now, so I can be prepared to establish some control over my potential parenthood, should I choose that route. I'd love some specific/personal recommendations rather than relying on google's results.
Feel free to memail me as well, if there is specific information that you would rather share privately.
This option has always been in the back of my head, but as my other options feel less ideal, I am now becoming more and more open to and enthusiastic about it. Any good leads on places to seek information would be incredibly helpful.
I am seriously considering this route, and it is of course a complicated course of action. I am curious about cost (of insemination-related procedures, rather than general healthcare), the methods of finding a highly-educated donor (and whether the cost would be too prohibitive), experiences of single mothers who chose this path, etc. I want to do my research now, so I can be prepared to establish some control over my potential parenthood, should I choose that route. I'd love some specific/personal recommendations rather than relying on google's results.
Feel free to memail me as well, if there is specific information that you would rather share privately.
This option has always been in the back of my head, but as my other options feel less ideal, I am now becoming more and more open to and enthusiastic about it. Any good leads on places to seek information would be incredibly helpful.
Response by poster: Also, I saw this thread, which helps, but some newer resources would be great as well. Many thanks!
posted by teslateslatesla at 1:28 PM on March 1, 2012
posted by teslateslatesla at 1:28 PM on March 1, 2012
I'd join Single Mothers By Choice. I was a member for a year, now considering joining again. I found the support really great there, both from women who had been or were currently going through the process as well as those who were thinking about it.
The various sperm banks will range in price. California Cryobank is one of the more pricey ones but they have a pretty wide variety of donors. I used European Sperm Bank for my one and only (so far) IUI and I would use them again should I ever go that route again. Some people I know used Xytex, Fairfax, or Sperm Bank of California, though there are other banks as well. Most of the banks' websites should let you run a search and sort the results by whether the donors have a college education or not (most of the ones I encountered did or were currently in college).
If you have any specific questions, don't hesitate to memail me!
posted by medeine at 3:50 PM on March 1, 2012 [1 favorite]
The various sperm banks will range in price. California Cryobank is one of the more pricey ones but they have a pretty wide variety of donors. I used European Sperm Bank for my one and only (so far) IUI and I would use them again should I ever go that route again. Some people I know used Xytex, Fairfax, or Sperm Bank of California, though there are other banks as well. Most of the banks' websites should let you run a search and sort the results by whether the donors have a college education or not (most of the ones I encountered did or were currently in college).
If you have any specific questions, don't hesitate to memail me!
posted by medeine at 3:50 PM on March 1, 2012 [1 favorite]
I second the SMC recommendation. The ladies on the forum are an excellent resource.
The Choice Moms site by Mikki Morrissette has excellent information regarding the process, fertility, etc. For example, someone put together a spreadsheet that looks at costs and options for the various sperm banks; it's from 2008 so it's a bit out of date but still fairly reliable. They also have a forum but the software the mailing list moved to sucks so I stopped reading that group.
For experiences, there are a number of books. I liked Louise Sloan's Knock Yourself Up: No Man? No Problem: A Tell-All Guide to Becoming a Single Mom. Mikki Morrissette's Choosing Single Motherhood: The Thinking Woman's Guide is also good.
Feel free to memail me too.
posted by bluesapphires at 1:12 PM on March 2, 2012
The Choice Moms site by Mikki Morrissette has excellent information regarding the process, fertility, etc. For example, someone put together a spreadsheet that looks at costs and options for the various sperm banks; it's from 2008 so it's a bit out of date but still fairly reliable. They also have a forum but the software the mailing list moved to sucks so I stopped reading that group.
For experiences, there are a number of books. I liked Louise Sloan's Knock Yourself Up: No Man? No Problem: A Tell-All Guide to Becoming a Single Mom. Mikki Morrissette's Choosing Single Motherhood: The Thinking Woman's Guide is also good.
Feel free to memail me too.
posted by bluesapphires at 1:12 PM on March 2, 2012
I was given recommendations to read Mikki Morrissette's Choosing Single Motherhood: The Thinking Woman's Guide which I found to be quite good as well as Helping the Stork: The Choices and Challenges of Donor Insemination by Carol Frost Vercollone, Heidi Moss, Robert Moss.
While Helping the Stork isn't written for single women in particular the authors make an effort to be inclusive of all kind of families. (It came out of Heidi & Robert Moss' own experiences with going the donor route so it's kind of 'couple focused' in some ways.) I found it helpful to work through some of my thoughts around donor issues (known donor, anonymous donor, open ID donor) that I wouldn't necessarily have done as much thinking about without the book.
posted by machine at 1:30 PM on March 2, 2012
While Helping the Stork isn't written for single women in particular the authors make an effort to be inclusive of all kind of families. (It came out of Heidi & Robert Moss' own experiences with going the donor route so it's kind of 'couple focused' in some ways.) I found it helpful to work through some of my thoughts around donor issues (known donor, anonymous donor, open ID donor) that I wouldn't necessarily have done as much thinking about without the book.
posted by machine at 1:30 PM on March 2, 2012
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posted by needs more cowbell at 1:14 PM on March 1, 2012