Setting up a Sex Blog

July 9, 2005 6:35 PM

What's the easiest and cheapest way to set up a sex blog?

I am female and find myself being extremely anxious in sexual situations to the point where I'd almost prefer not to be in them at all (even with partners I'm comfortable with). I'm not unexperienced, but feel that in order to overcome my crippling anxieties, I need to explore my sexual thoughts and feelings more fully.

I'm interested in writing stories, or preferably keeping a log of sexual fantasies and the voyuer in me wants to post this anonymously to the world wide web in blog format. There will be no dirty pictures, just dirty words.

I'm finding most the hosts I come across list "pornography" as something against their TOS and the adult friendly hosts I have found so far seem very difficult to work with.

Is there a cheap, easy and anonymous way I can start this blog without worrying that the site will be pulled for its content?

Alternatively, if I went with a mainstream host with the typical anti-pornographic stance, would I be able to get away with a sex/fantasy blog by toning down my content? If so, how much would it need to be toned down? It seems like I come across many blogs focused mainly on sexually explicit content and they're on mainstream hosts. Do they have a secret to getting away with it or are they playing Russian Roulette with their hosting services?

posted by anonymous to Computers & Internet (20 answers total)

It's not very likely that on a popular host (Blogspot, etc.) your blog will come to the attention of anyone capable of shutting it down. There's no secret to getting away with having an explicit blog on a mainstream host - you'll be a little fish in a very big pond and as long as you're not doing anything illegal, I really doubt you'll get into trouble.

(There's also the option of password-protecting your blog, which it doesn't seem like you want to do. You should keep a backup of your posts just to be on the safe side, but that applies to all blogs.)
posted by speranza at 6:51 PM on July 9, 2005

Stories and a log of your personal fantasies aren't "pornography," so you're in the clear as far as that matter is concerned.

Running down the link sidebar at (the now semi-abandoned) Daze Reader shows a whole bunch of similar sites with blogspot.com addresses. Some of those sites have been around for ages -- clearly the host isn't working against them.

I'm pretty sure you're being nervous about nothing. Start writing!
posted by majick at 6:52 PM on July 9, 2005

Here's Blogger's TOS.
posted by box at 6:57 PM on July 9, 2005

Do a Google search for some nasty words + "site:blogspot.com" and you'll see that everyone's doing it.
posted by johngoren at 7:12 PM on July 9, 2005

LiveJournal pretty much doesn't censor for content except for severe harassment or laws being broken. The sort of thing you mention is could be had for free there, would be welcome, and there are dozens of communities you could join devoted to bringing folks like you together.

I've had an LJ for a few years; they're dead easy to work with.
posted by ikkyu2 at 7:16 PM on July 9, 2005

There is only one way to do this properly, and that is Invisiblog
posted by phrontist at 8:09 PM on July 9, 2005

Start it wherever you want, but keep it backed up. The worst your hosting company can do is... stop hosting you.
posted by dagnyscott at 8:10 PM on July 9, 2005

Most hosting companies that prohibit "pornography" aren't doing so because they care about the content (the obvious exceptions being things like kiddie porn); they just don't want sites with excessive traffic, since that screws up their business model, and the typical porn site with pictures and movies and such is likely to have excessive traffic. A site like yours would be very unlikely to run afoul of their TOS.

With that said, I'd second the suggestion of LiveJournal. It sounds like you might find more value in a "community" blogging environment, where interaction between members is encouraged, than in just throwing your words out into the ether.
posted by bac at 8:23 PM on July 9, 2005

you might want to consider not blogging, but instead setting up a site at the Alt.Sex.Stores repository. And posting them to the associated newsgroups.
posted by dpx.mfx at 8:53 PM on July 9, 2005

Wow. Stores=stories. Sorry for the correction, but that's kind of a big difference.
posted by dpx.mfx at 8:58 PM on July 9, 2005

asstr.org hosts lots of erotic writers, so you might be able to get some hosting there.

Also, are you technicaly compitant enough to install blogging software yourself? You might want to just buy a .com and get 'regular' rather then blog hosting. one-hosting is pretty cheap and they allow porn ($83/year).
posted by delmoi at 9:23 PM on July 9, 2005

I'm a big fan of NearlyFreeSpeech.net

Not only do they allow adult content, but you pay $1 a gig of transfer. No monthly fees or anything. For a text-only site, I would be surprised if you have much more than a gig of traffic a month. You hosting bill for a year could be less than the cost of a pizza.
posted by lockle at 9:56 PM on July 9, 2005

go with blogspot. I wrote a sex blog for nearly a year there, it was fine.
posted by gaspode at 10:37 PM on July 9, 2005

Also, are you technicaly compitant enough to install blogging software yourself? You might want to just buy a .com and get 'regular' rather then blog hosting.

But then she'd have to choose between giving up being anonymous or breaking the law by using fake whois info (technically anyway, with almost no chance of enforcement). Also, there would be credit card info linked to the hosting account, so it would be (again, technically) traceable. With Blogger or one of the others, she could be pretty much 100% anonymous.
posted by letitrain at 10:38 PM on July 9, 2005

How about indecentblogging.com?
posted by jasper411 at 10:51 PM on July 9, 2005

But then she'd have to choose between giving up being anonymous or breaking the law by using fake whois info (technically anyway, with almost no chance of enforcement).

For ~$10, a domain proxy service will place their nice'n'legal contact info into your domain's WHOIS record. Problem solved. Of course, your identity would have to be released under subpoena, but anon isn't planning to break any laws anyway.

Anon, don't sweat the hosting issue much. Talking about sex issues is NOT equal to porn. Not remotely. See, for instance, Dr. Ruth, Dan Savage, Sue Johanson, etc.

Focus on the anonymity, and remember: archive.org is forever.
posted by nakedcodemonkey at 11:14 PM on July 9, 2005

remember: archive.org is forever.

Unless you use a robots.txt or ask them to remove stuff.
posted by grouse at 2:08 AM on July 10, 2005

You are somehow going to let us know about it, so we can read it, I hope, anon. Feel free to email me (us?) to let us know.
posted by filmgeek at 6:13 AM on July 10, 2005

i can't tell how public you want this to be, but i know a bunch of women with situations similar to yours who have semiprivate or private livejournals to record that kind of stuff, exploratory sex diary and stories stuff. if you're worried about who might see it, you can always filter entries as you choose--letting others read it, but not people you don't want to--and/or you can set up an account that's pretty anonymous in that you just choose a distant handle etc. you'll want to back up often, as others have mentioned.
posted by ifjuly at 7:58 AM on July 11, 2005

I know a bunch of folks who have very sexually oriented blogs on Blogger (one going back 2 years) and it has not been a problem. Assuming you will set up a blog, were's what I want to recommend.

Make sure you set up an email account and Blogger account totally separate from everything else in your life. If you need a Gmail invite, please write me. Leave out the identifying details such as geography. Don't post pictures. Also, depending on where your PC is, you will want to empty the browser cache on a regular basis, or password your screensaver.
posted by gleenyc at 10:22 AM on July 31, 2005