Thinking about moving, when is enough, enough?
April 2, 2011 8:58 PM Subscribe
Roommate/Renting Filter: Should I stay or should I go? I've rented room in a nice neighborhood for 3 years. I'm sick of my roommate and I want to be more social. Advice/opinions needed. (long version within)
posted by Polgara to human relations (10 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
Okay, so I've rented a room in a house for the past couple of years. When I moved in, there were two roommates, one of which was the owner. Since then, the other roommate moved out and the other is never home because she works all the time. This has worked out well for us in the past as I work the day shift and she does the night shift. The past year or so, when I do see her she has become increasingly negative, to the point where everyone word out of her mouth is something wrong with the world, her job, whatever. This is starting to bug me.
The other part of this is that when I moved here the house didn't look the best but was okay. The stairs are bare and unfinished, the living room and dining room are not used as to a point where they are dusty and filled with junk. I have been trying to be more friendly and social in general with others and would love to have people over, or at least feel comfortable letting them in, which I don't right now. Even if I did, if one thing was out of place or anything, my roommate would go into a whole passive aggressive tirade about it which I would have to hear for weeks.
The rent here is okay, not the cheapest and not the most expensive, but it has a big space for my dog. I'm conflicted as I'm wondering if I'm just overreacting or if I should actually move. I really feel this point as if I'm trapped in this room.
So, my questions are: Am I being irrational about inviting people over? Am I overreacting or being too picky? I could just entertain in my room, but it's kinda small and I'm in my 30's. Would it seem weird to entertain in a room when you're older?
I have to stay around a certain budget for rent purposes until next year when I can graduate, so if I did move, it would likely be with roommates again. With this roommate, I know she won't steal my things or throw drunken keggers, but with new roommates, that's all up in the air. Is it worth the uncertainty?
Lastly, if I did move, my dog has separation anxiety and in the past has chewed some things, which I have always paid for. Would this make it hard for me to find a new roommate?
As much as I appreciate the "talk to your roommate" advice, I've done that once before and she stopped for a while and then went back to being negative. She has told me I could have people over but then talks negatively about it after they leave. Talking to her is not an option.
Sorry for the length. I appreciate any comments or advice, but truthfully, I'm going out of my mind, here:)