Did I have a mini-stroke in my sleep? Should I go to the ER or a walk-in clinic for temporary vision loss in mainly one eye even though my vision is back? Will the doctors think I'm wasting their time?
First of all, I apologize in advance if this post is inappropriate in any way or if I post too much information. I'm not thinking rationally or coherently at the moment. I'm scared.
I hate having to do this but I'm linking this
post so I don't have to explain these unrelated details any more than I have to. Hopefully it gives you enough background information to know why I can't simply make a doctors appointment and why I need to figure out if going to the ER is really necessary before actually going. That's assuming I can go...
Below are excerpts from my journal attempting to explain in detail what happened that morning:
October 14, 2010
I’ve been having blurry vision in my right eye since waking up this morning. I was unable to read the clock from my bed but I managed to calm down and semi-convince myself that maybe blurriness is common when you first wake up. I then tested both eyes to see if I could read the closed captioning on my TV and I was unable to read the text at all with my right eye. I could see my way to the bathroom but I could barely focus my eyes. I went back to my room, tested my eyes again with the TV and a book, and the fear slowly began to intensify as I was starting to realize I’ve been up long enough (about 20 minutes) and I’ve never not
been able to read a book with my right eye before. As a matter of fact, I tested both eyes yesterday for no real reason except that I’m random and weird (I like to watch objects shift left to right when I open and close each eye). Both eyes were fine. I am near-sighted but I’ve always been able to read a digital clock 4 feet away. I also don’t remember ever waking up in the past and not being able to read my clock immediately*.
The blurriness in my one good eye appears to be subsiding as I’m typing this. It’s not as bad now.
I keep hoping all of this is a coincidence and I just slept on my right eye or something.
There’s some good news though. The whooshing, heartbeat sound in my left ear is less intense and not as consistently disruptive as it was yesterday. There’s also a lot less “pressure” in my head and ears this morning much to my relief**. I don’t know what that means. But the silence is nice. The reduced vision, not so much.
*Update (October 15): I was able to read the clock as soon as I got up this morning.
**Update (October 15): The “pressure” was back shortly after writing that entry. My ears and head feel sort of like I’m standing upside down and the blood is rushing to my head in a heartbeat-like rhythm. Sometimes I can “hear” a high frequency heartbeat-like rhythm in my ears not like the lower frequency pulsatile tinnitus I've been experiencing these last 2 or so months.
October 14, 2010
It’s been over an hour since my last entry. I can see more clearly now with both eyes open. The right eye, while still obviously blurrier than the other, isn’t as bad as it was initially. I’m able to comfortably read the clock and read a book with my left eye, so that’s a relief. I think it’s almost back to normal.
October 15, 2010
Thanks to searching Metafilter AskMe and more googling, I found out sudden temporary vision loss could be a sign of a mini-stroke. I talked to my mother about this yesterday for three or so minutes and she suggested (after I mentioned high blood pressure as one of the possible reasons for the pulsatile tinnitus) the vision loss could be weight-related high blood pressure and it should go away if I continue to exercise and eat less. She didn’t seem concerned at all once I mentioned it could have been a mini-stroke. As I continued to explain my symptoms I noticed she was no longer paying attention to me and was checking for Farmville items on her Facebook.
I’m surprised she didn’t yell at me about bringing it up less than 24 hours before her trip. Whether she yells at me or ignores me, either way, I still feel immensely guilty about bringing it up, as well as disgusted and angry and hurt that both my parents don’t seem to care at all. Saying “I don’t believe what you’re describing is serious or real. I’m sorry you’re scared and I love you.” would have been better than this.
What's disappointing is my father was right at the table with me during our conversation and he didn’t say anything. Was he avoiding me too? I wasn’t talking directly to him, so I can only hope he never paid attention to what was being said to know it was a serious conversation. Maybe he really was zoned out or watching TV. I don’t know.
I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do. Should I not take it seriously and call myself a hypochondriac? Talk to my father about it while my mother is out of town and hope he takes it seriously enough to take me to a walk-in clinic? Should I go to the ER?
He may not take it seriously because my vision is fine now. Also, money is an issue.
It’s always an issue.
Then they immediately buy replacement TVs and my mother either uses her credit cards, our grocery money, and/or nags my father for money so she can go to her 25th (not exaggerating) rock concert to see the same sub-par band because she has a crush on the lead singer.
And yet I feel guilty.