How to balance a PhD waitilist with PhD acceptance?
March 31, 2010 9:05 AM Subscribe
How do I balance my waitlisting to a wonderful PhD program with not messing up my acceptance to a great PhD program?
I got into wonderful PhD program at "Helicopter University" two months ago; I was told I am at the top of the waitlist for even more wonderful PhD program at "Spaceship University" this week. If I were accepted to Spaceship, I would go there, but Helicopter is great and I don't want to hurt my relationship with them during the waiting-to-hear-about-the-waitlist process, and I don't want to lose that spot if a spot at Spaceship never opens.
I have let Helicopter know that I am waiting to hear back from another program and do not want to make a final decision until I have a definitive accept/reject from all the programs I applied to. I thought it was polite to let them know why I'm keeping them on hold, but I didn't suggest that I preferred the anonymous other program to their program.
My worry is that a spot at Spaceship will not open up until the Great April 15th Deadline or even shortly afterwards. How do I go about keeping myself available for a possible spot at Spaceship without losing my spot at Helicopter in the event no Spaceship-spot opens?
I'm considering asking Helicopter for a short extension the acceptance deadline ONLY if it gets near April 15th and I haven't heard from Spaceship (of course, I'll also contact Spaceship again about my chances around that time). I'm not sure if they'll want to allow a deadline extension, though; I've had their acceptance letter for two months and they'll want to start contacting waitlist people for my spot around the 15th, if not before. On the other hand, I assume many schools make their 4/15 deadline somewhat permeable, as there is probably a great deal of accepting/rejecting/spots opening up on that day, so maybe Helicopter will be willing to grant me a few grace days if asked about it beforehand?
- Any ideas on wording such a request to Helicopter to extend their deadline so that I don't burn my bridges?
- Any other ideas for solving this problem?
For you non-applicants, April 15th is when you have to accept an offer of admission by or you lose the offer; if you accept an offer of admission and then break it, it's VERY BAD, the schools share this information, and schools sometimes retract their funding offers (so you end up with bad professional karma and no funding anywhere). I'm offered funding by Helicopter (and would be if Spaceship makes room for me), so accepting one offer and then breaking it isn't an option, even if I felt morally okay with doing that (I don't).
I got into wonderful PhD program at "Helicopter University" two months ago; I was told I am at the top of the waitlist for even more wonderful PhD program at "Spaceship University" this week. If I were accepted to Spaceship, I would go there, but Helicopter is great and I don't want to hurt my relationship with them during the waiting-to-hear-about-the-waitlist process, and I don't want to lose that spot if a spot at Spaceship never opens.
I have let Helicopter know that I am waiting to hear back from another program and do not want to make a final decision until I have a definitive accept/reject from all the programs I applied to. I thought it was polite to let them know why I'm keeping them on hold, but I didn't suggest that I preferred the anonymous other program to their program.
My worry is that a spot at Spaceship will not open up until the Great April 15th Deadline or even shortly afterwards. How do I go about keeping myself available for a possible spot at Spaceship without losing my spot at Helicopter in the event no Spaceship-spot opens?
I'm considering asking Helicopter for a short extension the acceptance deadline ONLY if it gets near April 15th and I haven't heard from Spaceship (of course, I'll also contact Spaceship again about my chances around that time). I'm not sure if they'll want to allow a deadline extension, though; I've had their acceptance letter for two months and they'll want to start contacting waitlist people for my spot around the 15th, if not before. On the other hand, I assume many schools make their 4/15 deadline somewhat permeable, as there is probably a great deal of accepting/rejecting/spots opening up on that day, so maybe Helicopter will be willing to grant me a few grace days if asked about it beforehand?
- Any ideas on wording such a request to Helicopter to extend their deadline so that I don't burn my bridges?
- Any other ideas for solving this problem?
For you non-applicants, April 15th is when you have to accept an offer of admission by or you lose the offer; if you accept an offer of admission and then break it, it's VERY BAD, the schools share this information, and schools sometimes retract their funding offers (so you end up with bad professional karma and no funding anywhere). I'm offered funding by Helicopter (and would be if Spaceship makes room for me), so accepting one offer and then breaking it isn't an option, even if I felt morally okay with doing that (I don't).
Be sure to call the admissions office at Spaceship university and explain your situation. Occasionally someone already knows your status and will let you know immediately. They get these calls all the time from stressed-out applicants.
if you accept an offer of admission and then break it, it's VERY BAD, the schools share this information, and schools sometimes retract their funding offers (so you end up with bad professional karma and no funding anywhere).
Wait, what? Is that true? I have never heard of this happening. I've only heard that many schools understand if you get an opening at a school with a better fit. This, too, happens quite often during the waitlisting period, which is why some people won't find out they've been accepted/denied from the waitlist until as late as May.
posted by zoomorphic at 9:29 AM on March 31, 2010 [1 favorite]
if you accept an offer of admission and then break it, it's VERY BAD, the schools share this information, and schools sometimes retract their funding offers (so you end up with bad professional karma and no funding anywhere).
Wait, what? Is that true? I have never heard of this happening. I've only heard that many schools understand if you get an opening at a school with a better fit. This, too, happens quite often during the waitlisting period, which is why some people won't find out they've been accepted/denied from the waitlist until as late as May.
posted by zoomorphic at 9:29 AM on March 31, 2010 [1 favorite]
For you non-applicants, April 15th is when you have to accept an offer of admission by or you lose the offer; if you accept an offer of admission and then break it, it's VERY BAD, the schools share this information, and schools sometimes retract their funding offers (so you end up with bad professional karma and no funding anywhere). I'm offered funding by Helicopter (and would be if Spaceship makes room for me), so accepting one offer and then breaking it isn't an option, even if I felt morally okay with doing that (I don't).
Are you sure about all of this? Explain the situation to Spaceship University. Ask Spaceship University what they would expect you to do. Because they probably wouldn't mind if you broke you "commitment" (not really a commitment!) to Helicopter University and went there.
posted by deanc at 9:34 AM on March 31, 2010
Are you sure about all of this? Explain the situation to Spaceship University. Ask Spaceship University what they would expect you to do. Because they probably wouldn't mind if you broke you "commitment" (not really a commitment!) to Helicopter University and went there.
posted by deanc at 9:34 AM on March 31, 2010
My guess is that Helicopter would not be offended to know that you are waiting specifically to hear from another institution where you are at the top of the waitlist. (Just waiting to hear from everyone makes you sound potentially unkeen on Helicopter, and callous towards waitlisted applicants; but these details make you sound like a person in an understandable dilemma.) In wording your request to Helicopter, it probably wouldn't hurt to repeat what you've said here about how Helicopter is great and you'd be happy to go there and you don't want to act rudely towards them. And you could also frame your request as a request for advice, since they're surely more familiar with options for handling this situation than you are. If you feel shy admitting you prefer another program, you might construe that preference as if based on some factor unrelated to Helicopter's self-esteem (e.g. Spaceship is in the southwest, where the climate better suits your pet armadillo's needs). I would also make sure Spaceship knows the precise dimensions of your situation; they may also have advice.
posted by feral_goldfish at 9:56 AM on March 31, 2010
posted by feral_goldfish at 9:56 AM on March 31, 2010
if you accept an offer of admission and then break it, it's VERY BAD, the schools share this information, and schools sometimes retract their funding offers (so you end up with bad professional karma and no funding anywhere
Depends on the type of program that you're going to. Very true in my department, because professors actively recruit incoming students who they want to work with and get pretty annoyed when they go back on their word and go elsewhere. Though it's not so much an issue of not getting the funding that you were promised as being moderately blacklisted by people who are influential in the field. This is only the case for students who reply definitively that they are going to one school and then end up going to another--uncertainty is certainly acceptable, as long as you haven't made any promises to anyone.
Who you should talk to about this varies by school, for me it would be the graduate program coordinator, but as long as you're honest--that you got onto a waitlist for another program and want to see how things pan out before making a final decision, a few days' extension should not be a big deal. Also recommend calling Spaceship in a week or two to see what they can tell you--they should be pretty forthcoming and willing to help you out.
posted by _cave at 10:00 AM on March 31, 2010
Depends on the type of program that you're going to. Very true in my department, because professors actively recruit incoming students who they want to work with and get pretty annoyed when they go back on their word and go elsewhere. Though it's not so much an issue of not getting the funding that you were promised as being moderately blacklisted by people who are influential in the field. This is only the case for students who reply definitively that they are going to one school and then end up going to another--uncertainty is certainly acceptable, as long as you haven't made any promises to anyone.
Who you should talk to about this varies by school, for me it would be the graduate program coordinator, but as long as you're honest--that you got onto a waitlist for another program and want to see how things pan out before making a final decision, a few days' extension should not be a big deal. Also recommend calling Spaceship in a week or two to see what they can tell you--they should be pretty forthcoming and willing to help you out.
posted by _cave at 10:00 AM on March 31, 2010
I am a professor and think that miriam is 100% right.
Congratulations!
posted by sesquipedalian at 10:03 AM on March 31, 2010
Congratulations!
posted by sesquipedalian at 10:03 AM on March 31, 2010
If you are really at the top of the waitlist, the odds of hearing before Apr. 15 are extremely good I'd say (though it might be only a few days before).
the schools share this information, and schools sometimes retract their funding offers (so you end up with bad professional karma and no funding anywhere).
FWIW I've never heard of this happening in my field or in related ones. Are you sure this is really something that happens in your field?
posted by advil at 10:09 AM on March 31, 2010
the schools share this information, and schools sometimes retract their funding offers (so you end up with bad professional karma and no funding anywhere).
FWIW I've never heard of this happening in my field or in related ones. Are you sure this is really something that happens in your field?
posted by advil at 10:09 AM on March 31, 2010
When you're tactfully requesting an extension from Helicopter, and (as miriam says they might) they ask what wait-list you're waiting on, one thing that could come off as rude is the assumption that everyone knows that Spaceship is a better school than Helicopter. You don't want to imply that of course anyone at Helicopter would rather be at Spaceship if they could, you want to say something about what a great opportunity Spaceship is for you, as a match for your particular interests, without saying anything negative about Helicopter. For example, I'm very excited about their [specialty] program; I've been reading about the research of Professor Spaceman since high school, so working in that department is something I can't pass up if it's still an option (notice I didn't say I had a contact in the Spaceman lab, but if it's true you can say it).
Youg goal is to be polite, but not persuadable. It's a tough skill, but one you'll need forever. Good luck!
posted by aimedwander at 10:19 AM on March 31, 2010
Youg goal is to be polite, but not persuadable. It's a tough skill, but one you'll need forever. Good luck!
posted by aimedwander at 10:19 AM on March 31, 2010
Helicopter knows the score. Just be tactful and sure as shit don't tell em' you're waiting on Spaceship.
Kudos.
(also, aimedwander is on point. A lot of folks don't realize that at the doctoral level, fit matters a lot more to your eventual success than a "good brand")
posted by solipsophistocracy at 12:56 PM on March 31, 2010
Kudos.
(also, aimedwander is on point. A lot of folks don't realize that at the doctoral level, fit matters a lot more to your eventual success than a "good brand")
posted by solipsophistocracy at 12:56 PM on March 31, 2010
You don't have to explain. Everybody knows this game and no one holds it against a strong applicant. Asking for a couple of extra days politely won't cost you the offer or mess anything up. They can say no, however, and if they have a strong waitlist too, they might.
Spaceship has to tell you by the 15th anyway, really they do.
It's very unlikely you'd be formally blacklisted for declining an offer you had earlier accepted, although it could potentially be reputation-damaging. I've seen it happen with no consequences that lasted for more than a year or two.
posted by fourcheesemac at 2:01 PM on March 31, 2010 [1 favorite]
Spaceship has to tell you by the 15th anyway, really they do.
It's very unlikely you'd be formally blacklisted for declining an offer you had earlier accepted, although it could potentially be reputation-damaging. I've seen it happen with no consequences that lasted for more than a year or two.
posted by fourcheesemac at 2:01 PM on March 31, 2010 [1 favorite]
Spaceship can accept you with funding afterwards, and then you need a note from Helicopter saying it is okay that you get funded by Spaceship instead. This is entirely permissible, and sometimes works out. (I mean, it's not like Helicopter desperately wants to fund someone who wants to leave.) I did know someone who, in a position much like yours, accepted Helicopter, then accepted Spaceship, then lost funding from *both* of them. This is, I grant, rare, but it's possible. (I do not know what happened the next year, if they even applied again.)
posted by jeather at 2:50 PM on March 31, 2010
posted by jeather at 2:50 PM on March 31, 2010
As I often find myself saying on Ask MeFi this time of year, I run a Ph.D. admissions program in the sciences at a research I university. If a student we'd accepted was on the waitlist at a program that was clearly a better fit for them, clearly higher-ranked, whatever, I would be completely fine with them waiting until April 15 at 4:59pm to give me a final answer, if need be.
You should also feel totally free to tell the admissions chair at Helicopter your situation. This is much more useful to me than when a student just doesn't tell me anything. No one will be offended.
posted by escabeche at 7:16 PM on March 31, 2010
You should also feel totally free to tell the admissions chair at Helicopter your situation. This is much more useful to me than when a student just doesn't tell me anything. No one will be offended.
posted by escabeche at 7:16 PM on March 31, 2010
Yeah, I've been DGS and admissions chair, and otherwise always involved in all this stuff, and it's just business. Honesty is always reputation enhancing even when the news is hard to deliver.
And hey anonymous, congratulations and welcome to the business. If your field is like mine at all, it was an even more competitive year than usual, with more applications from stronger people and with fewer fellowships to offer across all the fields and schools I know. To have at least one funded offer from a great place is really something. Potentially to have another from what seems an even better place is a real accomplishment. And that means you'll do fine at either program in the long run.
posted by fourcheesemac at 7:26 PM on March 31, 2010
And hey anonymous, congratulations and welcome to the business. If your field is like mine at all, it was an even more competitive year than usual, with more applications from stronger people and with fewer fellowships to offer across all the fields and schools I know. To have at least one funded offer from a great place is really something. Potentially to have another from what seems an even better place is a real accomplishment. And that means you'll do fine at either program in the long run.
posted by fourcheesemac at 7:26 PM on March 31, 2010
This thread is closed to new comments.
This is not an unusual request, and the department head should understand that your decision is a big deal in your life. He or she may well tell you that a grace period is not a possibility, but I would be very, very surprised if he or she held it against you.
You may find, however, that the head of the department will ask for specifics. I was surprised to learn that asking an admitted student about other offers he or she has received is de rigeur. In that case, be frank. By the time an academic gets to be a professor, he or she has been rejected, waitlisted, and toyed with often enough to know that one has to look out for one's own interests very aggressively. Tackling this problem tactfully, pragmatically, and with confidence actually reflects very well on you.
So congratulations and good luck. Be tactful and you'll be fine.
posted by miriam at 9:26 AM on March 31, 2010 [1 favorite]