Besides therapy, would a life coach help?
March 21, 2010 8:12 AM Subscribe
i grew up in a home where asking an innocent question such as, "why" resulted in verbal or physical abuse ("why are you so stupid", "don't ask why", and if I did, a hand or a fist would come at me). no surprise that i've also come to realize that I am SO much more insecure than I thought I was. now that I look back, I see that i've never asked the right questions at work, with doctors, or anything like that. My brain would shut down and I would just nod and agree to what I was being told only to think about what happened much later and realize that I should have asked this or that or responded in a certain way. My thought/response patterns have been pretty consistent throughout my life (sad, I know, as I'm nearing 40) and I desperately want to work on communicating better. I struggle to figure out how to say things "nicely" or in a way that's effective as opposed to what often times is more harsh/rude/ineffective.
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (15 answers total) 12 users marked this as a favorite
As a mother of a two-year old and with recent issues at work which is where this realization occurred, I know if I could find some guidance in learning to change my thought process in these situations so that I think more clearly / quickly and speak up like I would with my husband and siblings and not find myself being taken advantage of over and over or just completely blown off because my slow "reflexes" lost the opportunity to speak up. I am extremely hard on myself and don't take to making mistakes well at all - I end up hating myself and struggle with myself to stop these thoughts. I desperately need guidance... a lot of it. Besides therapy, would a life coach help? I'd like to be able to have someone whom I can contact to help me with my day to day issues and concerns. Anyone btdt? have referrals / suggestions? I work in NYC. TIA!