Yes, you found my Tylenol PM. I have been found out.
January 15, 2010 8:49 AM Subscribe
Why do people snoop in other people's medicine cabinets?
I had a friend over last night and while he was in the bathroom, I heard a huge crash as stuff dropped into the sink and rolled on the floor. "Wow, I'm busted!" was how he laughed it off when he came out. My medicine cabinet has a faulty shelf and when he was snooping, it collapsed and everything came crashing down.
This mystifies me. I've never snooped in anyone's medicine cabinet, and the thought would never have occurred to me. I don't know what in the world I would expect to learn about someone from their medicine cabinet -- conduct some kind of Rohrschach analysis based on their choice of toothpaste? And yet, asking around today, nearly everyone has said that snooping in the bathroom cabinet is as old as the hills, and how could I not this? Please enlighten me. I don't get it.
I had a friend over last night and while he was in the bathroom, I heard a huge crash as stuff dropped into the sink and rolled on the floor. "Wow, I'm busted!" was how he laughed it off when he came out. My medicine cabinet has a faulty shelf and when he was snooping, it collapsed and everything came crashing down.
This mystifies me. I've never snooped in anyone's medicine cabinet, and the thought would never have occurred to me. I don't know what in the world I would expect to learn about someone from their medicine cabinet -- conduct some kind of Rohrschach analysis based on their choice of toothpaste? And yet, asking around today, nearly everyone has said that snooping in the bathroom cabinet is as old as the hills, and how could I not this? Please enlighten me. I don't get it.
It's one of the least physically intrusive, slightly sneaky, ways you can spy into someone's life. Since it's a medicine cabinet, people might have... medicine.. in there. Like blood pressure or heart medication. Antidepressants. Stimulants. Viagra. Birth control pills. Hemorrhoid cream. Teeth whitening strips. Cosmetics that could be masking any number of things. Anti-aging creams. Rogaine.
Any number of things that treat or cover up easily hidden conditions or preferences.
posted by mikeh at 8:54 AM on January 15, 2010
Any number of things that treat or cover up easily hidden conditions or preferences.
posted by mikeh at 8:54 AM on January 15, 2010
To see if you have any good prescription meds (i.e. vicodin, xanax) and steal them. Not accusing your friend of that motive of course, but it's widespread.
posted by bunnycup at 8:54 AM on January 15, 2010 [2 favorites]
posted by bunnycup at 8:54 AM on January 15, 2010 [2 favorites]
People are just plain old nosy, and the bathroom is often the only place in someone's house where you can snoop without getting noticed/caught.
posted by Metroid Baby at 8:55 AM on January 15, 2010 [5 favorites]
posted by Metroid Baby at 8:55 AM on January 15, 2010 [5 favorites]
People don't respect your privacy as much as they ought to, basically.
posted by aught at 8:56 AM on January 15, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by aught at 8:56 AM on January 15, 2010 [1 favorite]
"Ohhhh, this completely extroverted person has an anxiety disorder!"
"Ew, fennel-flavored toothpaste. What a hippie."
"Hmm, what is this thing OH MY GOD IT'S A MENSTRUAL CUP AND IT'S BEEN INSIDE HER COOCH GETITOFFGETITOFF"
"Condoms? You mean he's actually getting some, or he just THINKS he can?"
Same reason we snoop anywhere. We want to learn more about a person than they have told us. Maybe that can help us understand them better. (Or maybe we're just nosy, awful gits. your choice.)
posted by Madamina at 8:56 AM on January 15, 2010 [11 favorites]
"Ew, fennel-flavored toothpaste. What a hippie."
"Hmm, what is this thing OH MY GOD IT'S A MENSTRUAL CUP AND IT'S BEEN INSIDE HER COOCH GETITOFFGETITOFF"
"Condoms? You mean he's actually getting some, or he just THINKS he can?"
Same reason we snoop anywhere. We want to learn more about a person than they have told us. Maybe that can help us understand them better. (Or maybe we're just nosy, awful gits. your choice.)
posted by Madamina at 8:56 AM on January 15, 2010 [11 favorites]
I avoid this by not having a medicine cabinet. I've often thought that I needed a stunt medicine cabinet that had, say, four diaphragms, an enema bag and Family Size bottles of klonopin and Maalox. I don't snoop in strangers cabinets but I've definitely looked in ones belonging to family members or close friends when I was looking for something. Like, i don't think of it as "off limits" space, just "where the toothpaste might be". There is a lot you can learn from someone's medicine cabinet, though in most situations if you're already in their house you'd know some of this stuff anyhow. So you might learn
- whether they use "hippie" products or Big Brand Name products
- if they've got digestive issues or are afflicted by other maladies
- what prescription medications they're taking [which can lead to a whole host of other possibly unwarranted assumptions]
- what birth control they use, possibly
- whether their non-live in partner shares bathroom space with them
- what some of their grooming preferences are [eyelash curler, nose-hair drimmer, toenail clippers, blackhead remover]
- what their general approach to spending money on toiletries is [is this high end stuff or low end stuff?]
- what their general approach to cleaning out the medicine cabinet is [is there a lot of old ganky stuff in there?]
If you live in a world where this sort of stuff isn't really a big revelation [i.e. I already know my friend takes XYX medication] then yeah it's no big deal. Some people are more private about their bathrooms than others. I grew up in a family with one shared bathroom, so I assumed the bathroom was public space. For people who grew up in a setting where there was a master bath off the main bedroom, they may be much more accustomed to the bathroom being private space.
posted by jessamyn at 8:59 AM on January 15, 2010
- whether they use "hippie" products or Big Brand Name products
- if they've got digestive issues or are afflicted by other maladies
- what prescription medications they're taking [which can lead to a whole host of other possibly unwarranted assumptions]
- what birth control they use, possibly
- whether their non-live in partner shares bathroom space with them
- what some of their grooming preferences are [eyelash curler, nose-hair drimmer, toenail clippers, blackhead remover]
- what their general approach to spending money on toiletries is [is this high end stuff or low end stuff?]
- what their general approach to cleaning out the medicine cabinet is [is there a lot of old ganky stuff in there?]
If you live in a world where this sort of stuff isn't really a big revelation [i.e. I already know my friend takes XYX medication] then yeah it's no big deal. Some people are more private about their bathrooms than others. I grew up in a family with one shared bathroom, so I assumed the bathroom was public space. For people who grew up in a setting where there was a master bath off the main bedroom, they may be much more accustomed to the bathroom being private space.
posted by jessamyn at 8:59 AM on January 15, 2010
It's also possible he actually WASN'T snooping, and was just looking for asprin or something because he had a bit of a headache. Yeah, he could have asked you outright, but I know that sometimes when I'm visiting my parents and find myself in the same circumstances, I often find it's easier to just look for the asprin myself rather than ask my mother where it is and then have to wait for her to finish whatever she may be doing and then come in and hunt for it. In this case, the "ooh, busted" may just be a nervous laughing acknowledgement that he is aware of what this situation looks like.
(Although, the last time I went looking for asprin at my parents' without asking, I stumbled across a bottle of Astroglide, and so now I ALWAYS ASK MOM TO LOOK FOR THINGS FOR ME BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO RUN INTO THAT AGAIN.)
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 8:59 AM on January 15, 2010 [7 favorites]
(Although, the last time I went looking for asprin at my parents' without asking, I stumbled across a bottle of Astroglide, and so now I ALWAYS ASK MOM TO LOOK FOR THINGS FOR ME BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO RUN INTO THAT AGAIN.)
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 8:59 AM on January 15, 2010 [7 favorites]
The fact that this kind of snooping is even borderline acceptable is why I've been forced to sanitize my medicine cabinet. Now it's a careful arrangement of innocuous OTC bottles and contact lens paraphernalia.
Idea makes me sick, really, but amro has it. Also several others, but again I'm thrown by the air of acceptance for the practice.
posted by tigrrrlily at 8:59 AM on January 15, 2010 [2 favorites]
Idea makes me sick, really, but amro has it. Also several others, but again I'm thrown by the air of acceptance for the practice.
posted by tigrrrlily at 8:59 AM on January 15, 2010 [2 favorites]
I think humans are hard-wired to be curious. We want to discover that which is not immediately apparent. Looking in someone's medicine cabinet is a really easy way to do this which is (usually) harmless and undetectable. I doubt your friend had any malicious intent or was trying to dig up "dirt" on you. Most likely he was just scratching some psychological itch.
I've done this myself in the past, and as soon as the cabinet was open I thought "hmm, it looks just like mine -- why did I do that, anyway?" It was just a spur-of-the-moment thing that I hadn't planned to do and didn't really have a reason for. And afterward I was as baffled about the action as any onlooker would've been.
I agree with everyone suggesting putting very personal things in other locations. I also don't look in people's cabinets anymore because in retrospect it was very snoopy and rude. But at the time it happened basically unthinkingly and I assume it's the same for others besides weird me.
posted by The Winsome Parker Lewis at 9:03 AM on January 15, 2010 [3 favorites]
I've done this myself in the past, and as soon as the cabinet was open I thought "hmm, it looks just like mine -- why did I do that, anyway?" It was just a spur-of-the-moment thing that I hadn't planned to do and didn't really have a reason for. And afterward I was as baffled about the action as any onlooker would've been.
I agree with everyone suggesting putting very personal things in other locations. I also don't look in people's cabinets anymore because in retrospect it was very snoopy and rude. But at the time it happened basically unthinkingly and I assume it's the same for others besides weird me.
posted by The Winsome Parker Lewis at 9:03 AM on January 15, 2010 [3 favorites]
In hopes of finding some creepy-crawly secrets.
In an effort to assure themselves that everyone else has creepy-crawly secrets, as they do.
posted by A Terrible Llama at 9:05 AM on January 15, 2010 [6 favorites]
In an effort to assure themselves that everyone else has creepy-crawly secrets, as they do.
posted by A Terrible Llama at 9:05 AM on January 15, 2010 [6 favorites]
I'm thrown by the air of acceptance for the practice.
Basically, the bathroom is an ill-defined space because it's where you keep seriously private stuff, yet on the other hand, assuming you only have one bathroom, it's a place that even near-strangers visiting your home must be allowed to enter. I'd never snoop in someone's bedroom but would always consider their living-room bookshelves, perhaps even living-room cupboards, fair game. The medicine cabinet sits awkwardly in the middle.
posted by game warden to the events rhino at 9:06 AM on January 15, 2010 [2 favorites]
Basically, the bathroom is an ill-defined space because it's where you keep seriously private stuff, yet on the other hand, assuming you only have one bathroom, it's a place that even near-strangers visiting your home must be allowed to enter. I'd never snoop in someone's bedroom but would always consider their living-room bookshelves, perhaps even living-room cupboards, fair game. The medicine cabinet sits awkwardly in the middle.
posted by game warden to the events rhino at 9:06 AM on January 15, 2010 [2 favorites]
I've heard of people putting marbles in their medicine cabinet before having guests over in order to catch a snoop, and I am too afraid of something like that happening to actually sneak a peak. But I'd LOVE to.
I'm always curious about what people are like in private. People hide so much of themselves socially, even with close friends sometimes, and I'm always curious about what actually lies behind the mask. Not in a malicious way... I mean, it might be comforting to discover that a very together-seeming friend has Monistat and zit cream in her cabinet just like everybody else... but mostly it's just fun to get a peek behind the social facade.
I also enjoy looking at the less private stuff my friends leave out on the bathroom counter or open shelves... bath stuff, makeup, perfume. It's just kind of fun to know what they use that is the same, and what is different.
posted by Serene Empress Dork at 9:10 AM on January 15, 2010
I'm always curious about what people are like in private. People hide so much of themselves socially, even with close friends sometimes, and I'm always curious about what actually lies behind the mask. Not in a malicious way... I mean, it might be comforting to discover that a very together-seeming friend has Monistat and zit cream in her cabinet just like everybody else... but mostly it's just fun to get a peek behind the social facade.
I also enjoy looking at the less private stuff my friends leave out on the bathroom counter or open shelves... bath stuff, makeup, perfume. It's just kind of fun to know what they use that is the same, and what is different.
posted by Serene Empress Dork at 9:10 AM on January 15, 2010
Apparently, lots of people are really nosy about weird things. I was also really surprised to find that this is really, really common. In fact, many articles I've read on planning parties in your home caution you to hide / remove anything from your medicine cabinet that you do not want guests to see (Real Simple was one that recommended this).
It surprised me to learn this because I always considered myself a little TOO nosy -- I mean, one of my favorite things to do is look at photos of people's living spaces in Flickr. I love both seeing how people decorate and the kind of stuff they have. But medicine cabinets? Who gives a shit? Apparently lots of people.
The only places I have gone through medicine cabinets is when I'm visiting relatives / friends and staying overnight and need something and they aren't around to ask. Otherwise, I'd always ask.
I don't tend to edit what I keep in my bathroom's medicine cabinet or under the sink. If someone is fascinated with my tampons and dental floss, well...whatever. I keep all prescription and OTC medication in a cabinet in the kitchen anyway, which I thought was where everyone kept it.
I really, really doubt the intent is to steal prescription meds, btw.
posted by tastybrains at 9:15 AM on January 15, 2010
It surprised me to learn this because I always considered myself a little TOO nosy -- I mean, one of my favorite things to do is look at photos of people's living spaces in Flickr. I love both seeing how people decorate and the kind of stuff they have. But medicine cabinets? Who gives a shit? Apparently lots of people.
The only places I have gone through medicine cabinets is when I'm visiting relatives / friends and staying overnight and need something and they aren't around to ask. Otherwise, I'd always ask.
I don't tend to edit what I keep in my bathroom's medicine cabinet or under the sink. If someone is fascinated with my tampons and dental floss, well...whatever. I keep all prescription and OTC medication in a cabinet in the kitchen anyway, which I thought was where everyone kept it.
I really, really doubt the intent is to steal prescription meds, btw.
posted by tastybrains at 9:15 AM on January 15, 2010
I never knew that this was a common practice until I saw it used as a stunt on Candid Camera. They filled up a fake medicine cabinet with hundreds of marbles, which immediately and noisily fell out as soon as someone opened the door. Years ago a friend of mine confided "Do you know that Debbie has four boxes of Summer's Eve in her medicine cabinet? Do you think she has a problem of some sort?" "What were you doing in Debbie's medicine cabinet?" I asked. "Um, I needed a Q-Tip." (BTW, experts recommend that you don't keep your prescription meds in the bathroom, as the steam and moisture could harm them.)
posted by Oriole Adams at 9:15 AM on January 15, 2010
posted by Oriole Adams at 9:15 AM on January 15, 2010
Sometimes I'm just looking for a bit of air freshener so as to not disturb the other guests; the host should have left it out.
posted by troybob at 9:21 AM on January 15, 2010
posted by troybob at 9:21 AM on January 15, 2010
No idea, but this entire phenomenon fascinates me, as I do not use the medicine cabinets in my apartment at all. Rather, my desk and bathroom counters pretty much are covered with any meds I'm regularly taking and products I'm using, since to do otherwise risks me forgetting to take them / use them or not be able to find them.
I never snoop like this, but I have done a visual survey of any bathroom I've been inside of in another person's home, just to see what is there. Usually a response to being bored on the toilet though.
posted by strixus at 9:28 AM on January 15, 2010
I never snoop like this, but I have done a visual survey of any bathroom I've been inside of in another person's home, just to see what is there. Usually a response to being bored on the toilet though.
posted by strixus at 9:28 AM on January 15, 2010
I'm thrown by the air of acceptance for the practice.
I think this is not okay. But I know lots of people do it.
posted by grouse at 9:35 AM on January 15, 2010
I think this is not okay. But I know lots of people do it.
posted by grouse at 9:35 AM on January 15, 2010
Because they are nosy and have no manners? I wouldn't mind someone looking in my bathroom cabinets if they had a legitimate reason (i.e., they were looking for a new roll of toilet paper) but if anyone was caught snooping like your friend I'd never invite him to my home again.
posted by orange swan at 9:39 AM on January 15, 2010 [2 favorites]
posted by orange swan at 9:39 AM on January 15, 2010 [2 favorites]
I want to n troybob's response; I sometimes look for products that aren't immediately apparent in the bathroom in the medicine cabinet or the undersink cabinets but that I'd like to use for hygenic purposes.
posted by arimathea at 9:44 AM on January 15, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by arimathea at 9:44 AM on January 15, 2010 [1 favorite]
My apartment has a built-in vanity with a sink in the master bedroom. As a result, I keep nearly all personal products there, and my bathroom is nearly empty: towel, washcloth, soap, shampoo, hand soap, hand towel, toilet paper. The medicine cabinet in the bathroom is completely empty. Even common things such as toothbrush, deodorant, comb, nail clippers, razor, aspirin, etc., are at the bedroom vanity, let alone prescription meds.
It amuses me to think what guests who don't realize I have a bedroom vanity must think about my lifestyle, doubly so if they snoop in the medicine cabinet, drawers, etc.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 9:47 AM on January 15, 2010
It amuses me to think what guests who don't realize I have a bedroom vanity must think about my lifestyle, doubly so if they snoop in the medicine cabinet, drawers, etc.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 9:47 AM on January 15, 2010
I really, really doubt the intent is to steal prescription meds, btw.
I've had prescription meds stolen out of my bathroom enough times that I no longer keep them there. I had to move them out of the hall closet near the bathroom, too. YMMV.
posted by Pufferish at 9:50 AM on January 15, 2010
I've had prescription meds stolen out of my bathroom enough times that I no longer keep them there. I had to move them out of the hall closet near the bathroom, too. YMMV.
posted by Pufferish at 9:50 AM on January 15, 2010
Hmmm, one might do this in the medicine cabinet of, say, a potential love interest, to see if there are signs of a rival for his or her attention?
Not that I've ever done such a thing.
Nope. Not me. Never.
posted by chez shoes at 9:52 AM on January 15, 2010 [1 favorite]
Not that I've ever done such a thing.
Nope. Not me. Never.
posted by chez shoes at 9:52 AM on January 15, 2010 [1 favorite]
At my house? They'd be looking for an invitation to GTFO.
I would give them shit for being nosy, and then ask them what they thought they were doing. I would ahve to assume they were looking to steal prescription drugs.
If they're looking for nsaids or something, they can ask. (Besides, our nsaids are in the kitchen.)
posted by TomMelee at 10:03 AM on January 15, 2010 [1 favorite]
I would give them shit for being nosy, and then ask them what they thought they were doing. I would ahve to assume they were looking to steal prescription drugs.
If they're looking for nsaids or something, they can ask. (Besides, our nsaids are in the kitchen.)
posted by TomMelee at 10:03 AM on January 15, 2010 [1 favorite]
I wouldn't call it snooping.
If there is a door, I will open it. If it's a window, I'll look through it. If it's a box, I'll look in it.
Just my nature.
posted by blue_beetle at 10:05 AM on January 15, 2010 [4 favorites]
If there is a door, I will open it. If it's a window, I'll look through it. If it's a box, I'll look in it.
Just my nature.
posted by blue_beetle at 10:05 AM on January 15, 2010 [4 favorites]
If they're putting it in that cabinet, they don't care if you see it.
posted by Zambrano at 10:06 AM on January 15, 2010 [4 favorites]
posted by Zambrano at 10:06 AM on January 15, 2010 [4 favorites]
I always have the urge to snoop, but don't. The fact that you shouldn't do it, but it's pretty harmless (if you're not planning on stealing anything) and the fact that you're unlikely to get caught...it's kind of appealingly naughty.
A doctor one told me that you shouldn't keep any drugs of any kind in the medicine cabinet. The warmth and humidity is bad for them. Mine is full of face scrubs, hair stuff, cotton balls, and tattoo goo.
posted by JoanArkham at 10:07 AM on January 15, 2010
A doctor one told me that you shouldn't keep any drugs of any kind in the medicine cabinet. The warmth and humidity is bad for them. Mine is full of face scrubs, hair stuff, cotton balls, and tattoo goo.
posted by JoanArkham at 10:07 AM on January 15, 2010
Nthing stealing meds, I've seen it happen. Jim Carroll did it in his "Basketball Diaries."
posted by Melismata at 10:10 AM on January 15, 2010
posted by Melismata at 10:10 AM on January 15, 2010
Best answer: For my last birthday, a couple of buddies got me a giant dildo as a joke. I delight in keeping it in the medicine cabinet and closely monitor friends' expressions as they exit the bathroom.
posted by Skot at 10:23 AM on January 15, 2010 [24 favorites]
posted by Skot at 10:23 AM on January 15, 2010 [24 favorites]
I'm bored and twitchy. Not that I purposefully snoop for things, but I will let my eyes wander around and try to find something to focus on besides what I'm doing. If the cabinet door is open, I'll look. I'll look at what's on the counter.
Also, sometimes people (of my acquantince) put the extra toilet paper in the cupboard under the sink and if the roll runs out, well, I can't exactly leave and go ask them to get it for me.
I assume people in my bathroom will look, because people are curious. So when I clean for company, I straighten the cupboard and cabinet too.
posted by sandraregina at 10:24 AM on January 15, 2010
Also, sometimes people (of my acquantince) put the extra toilet paper in the cupboard under the sink and if the roll runs out, well, I can't exactly leave and go ask them to get it for me.
I assume people in my bathroom will look, because people are curious. So when I clean for company, I straighten the cupboard and cabinet too.
posted by sandraregina at 10:24 AM on January 15, 2010
I snoop when I need medications and it will be embarassing to both parties to discuss it (just finished dinner at your party, and now I need something to handle my upset stomach).
posted by holyrood at 10:31 AM on January 15, 2010
posted by holyrood at 10:31 AM on January 15, 2010
Don't keep medicine in your "medicine cabinet". Yes, people snoop. Yes, people take yummy yummy painkillers or amphetamines or whatever.
But beyond that a bathroom is pretty much the worst place in your home to keep medication. Wildly fluctuating humidity levels? What could possibly go wrong!
posted by Justinian at 10:41 AM on January 15, 2010
But beyond that a bathroom is pretty much the worst place in your home to keep medication. Wildly fluctuating humidity levels? What could possibly go wrong!
posted by Justinian at 10:41 AM on January 15, 2010
I don't know what in the world I would expect to learn about someone from their medicine cabinet -- conduct some kind of Rohrschach analysis based on their choice of toothpaste?
well, surely many people have things in their medicine cabinet more "private" than toothpaste. In fact, many people leave their toothpaste out on the sink, but might have more embarrassing products in the cabinet. The kind of products that have cringeworthy commercials, for instance - viagra or hemorrhoid cream or herpes meds or rogaine or douches or enemas or lube or, probably anything related to sex, or genital/ass problems, basically, can be considered embarrassing in some circles. And if it's embarrassing to be seen, then nosy people consider it exciting to see.
Some people are simply not nosy - they would honestly rather not know. Some people have a nosy side that they have successfully quieted because they think it's polite to leave people some privacy. Some people are not nosy because their circle of friends is very open and very little is considered embarrassing, so there's very little to be nosy about (though in most circles there is still something that embarrasses, though it may be something very different from traditional sources of shame). And some people just want to know what lies hidden, and bathroom habits are an easily accessible and traditionally embarrassing source.
posted by mdn at 10:46 AM on January 15, 2010
well, surely many people have things in their medicine cabinet more "private" than toothpaste. In fact, many people leave their toothpaste out on the sink, but might have more embarrassing products in the cabinet. The kind of products that have cringeworthy commercials, for instance - viagra or hemorrhoid cream or herpes meds or rogaine or douches or enemas or lube or, probably anything related to sex, or genital/ass problems, basically, can be considered embarrassing in some circles. And if it's embarrassing to be seen, then nosy people consider it exciting to see.
Some people are simply not nosy - they would honestly rather not know. Some people have a nosy side that they have successfully quieted because they think it's polite to leave people some privacy. Some people are not nosy because their circle of friends is very open and very little is considered embarrassing, so there's very little to be nosy about (though in most circles there is still something that embarrasses, though it may be something very different from traditional sources of shame). And some people just want to know what lies hidden, and bathroom habits are an easily accessible and traditionally embarrassing source.
posted by mdn at 10:46 AM on January 15, 2010
Nthing theft of prescription meds like Vicodin. I have heard of drug seekers going to real estate open houses just to snoop through medicine cabinets.
posted by Daddy-O at 10:53 AM on January 15, 2010
posted by Daddy-O at 10:53 AM on January 15, 2010
(aside to holyrood:) Whenever a certain hypothetical irresponsible person is about to leave for a few days, she tends to grab whatever meds bottle is handy and dump whatever she'll need inside that. (unless she's flying, that is). Labels are a bitch to scrape off, but then she's been taking these pills for years, there's no chance of a mix-up. For her, that is.
Combine this with some of the habits above, and your "embarrassing" upset stomach might be replaced by something Considerably More Hilarious.
posted by tigrrrlily at 10:54 AM on January 15, 2010
Combine this with some of the habits above, and your "embarrassing" upset stomach might be replaced by something Considerably More Hilarious.
posted by tigrrrlily at 10:54 AM on January 15, 2010
If someone went in my medicine cabinet and I found out, I would not invite them back to my house.
However, if someone said, "Hey, do you have any floss?" I would happily say, "In the medicine cabinet, second shelf," and let them look themselves.
I don't have anything in particular to hide, but I would find the uninvited looking in my cabinet an incredible invasion of my privacy, and I would never, ever do it at someone else's house. Heck, I don't go in my friends' refrigerators without permission.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 11:13 AM on January 15, 2010 [4 favorites]
However, if someone said, "Hey, do you have any floss?" I would happily say, "In the medicine cabinet, second shelf," and let them look themselves.
I don't have anything in particular to hide, but I would find the uninvited looking in my cabinet an incredible invasion of my privacy, and I would never, ever do it at someone else's house. Heck, I don't go in my friends' refrigerators without permission.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 11:13 AM on January 15, 2010 [4 favorites]
He was looking for goofballs.
posted by bunny hugger at 11:16 AM on January 15, 2010
posted by bunny hugger at 11:16 AM on January 15, 2010
I don't really believe that the medicine cabinet is off limits to guests. I assume that people may look in there for some lotion after washing their hands or some mouthwash before returning to the conversation. It's not like a locker or something. It's a small storage space above the sink where we keep things that we need to use while in the bathroom. No big deal.
posted by orme at 11:19 AM on January 15, 2010
posted by orme at 11:19 AM on January 15, 2010
I leave people's medicine cabinets alone, unless I'm a houseguest and they have offered the use of the medicine cabinet for storing my toiletries. Otherwise, it's none of my damn business.
On the other hand, I *do* peek behind people's shower curtains, particularly when I'm at a party, but that has more to do with a childhood filled with scary movies. You *have* to check behind the curtain, to make sure that you can use the toilet without being attacked by the knife-wielding psycho/anaconda/invasion of giant spiders. (Rich Hall even coined a Sniglet for it: Psychophobia -- the compulsion to check behind the shower curtain when using the bathroom at someone else's house, to make sure that a knife-wielding killer isn't hiding in the tub.)
posted by bakerina at 11:22 AM on January 15, 2010 [4 favorites]
On the other hand, I *do* peek behind people's shower curtains, particularly when I'm at a party, but that has more to do with a childhood filled with scary movies. You *have* to check behind the curtain, to make sure that you can use the toilet without being attacked by the knife-wielding psycho/anaconda/invasion of giant spiders. (Rich Hall even coined a Sniglet for it: Psychophobia -- the compulsion to check behind the shower curtain when using the bathroom at someone else's house, to make sure that a knife-wielding killer isn't hiding in the tub.)
posted by bakerina at 11:22 AM on January 15, 2010 [4 favorites]
I guess it matters who we're talking about. If it was one of my best-bud's, I'd think it was weird, but I'd go with it. If it was ANYONE else though, that would be uncool.
Seriously, you'd go to someone's house and use their mouthwash? Without saying anything? You'd assume that the white pills were aspirin and help yourself? You'd root around for lotion? Man yet again MF shows me that I've been riding a completely different train than lots of other people for a long, long time.
posted by TomMelee at 11:31 AM on January 15, 2010 [5 favorites]
Seriously, you'd go to someone's house and use their mouthwash? Without saying anything? You'd assume that the white pills were aspirin and help yourself? You'd root around for lotion? Man yet again MF shows me that I've been riding a completely different train than lots of other people for a long, long time.
posted by TomMelee at 11:31 AM on January 15, 2010 [5 favorites]
Response by poster: For the record, he totally copped to the snooping so there's no doubt about what he was doing. But he's really not a close friend, so the whole thing was extremely off-putting. Creeeeeepy.
I'm baffled at how commonplace this is. I'm a very curious person, and have had to restrain myself from reading people's email or journals when I really wanted to -- but the medicine cabinet thing just never struck me as anything remotely worth investigating.
posted by venividivici at 11:56 AM on January 15, 2010
I'm baffled at how commonplace this is. I'm a very curious person, and have had to restrain myself from reading people's email or journals when I really wanted to -- but the medicine cabinet thing just never struck me as anything remotely worth investigating.
posted by venividivici at 11:56 AM on January 15, 2010
I've looked in bathroom cabinets for Tylenol. I wouldn't just assume some unmarked pill was a painkiller and take it. Most over the counter pills have the brand name stamped on the side.
I've done this at really close friends' houses where it wasn't a big deal and I knew they wouldn't care.
However, I have also done it when I have had to stay overnight at houses where I am really, really uncomfortable and I didn't want to ask them for anything. Relatives. This was when I was younger and very anxious about making requests. So, maybe people are snooping because they need something and are afraid to ask.
When I have guests (for overnight stays--huge parties would be different), I tell them where they can find things and tell them they can help themselves. Bathroom cabinet included. The embarassing stuff gets stashed in a more private location.
posted by mmmbacon at 11:57 AM on January 15, 2010
I've done this at really close friends' houses where it wasn't a big deal and I knew they wouldn't care.
However, I have also done it when I have had to stay overnight at houses where I am really, really uncomfortable and I didn't want to ask them for anything. Relatives. This was when I was younger and very anxious about making requests. So, maybe people are snooping because they need something and are afraid to ask.
When I have guests (for overnight stays--huge parties would be different), I tell them where they can find things and tell them they can help themselves. Bathroom cabinet included. The embarassing stuff gets stashed in a more private location.
posted by mmmbacon at 11:57 AM on January 15, 2010
OP is luckily that broken shelf is there. It alleviates the need to booby-trap your bathroom during parties. A common gag is to fill your cabinet with marbles or ping-pong balls, close the door, and pray someone gets nosy.
This article has way too much info about the habit, for snoopers and snoopees.
posted by spamguy at 12:03 PM on January 15, 2010
This article has way too much info about the habit, for snoopers and snoopees.
posted by spamguy at 12:03 PM on January 15, 2010
I think there is something beautiful about how people arrange things, and what they choose to buy. Maybe I am kidding myself or naive, but the few times I've looked behind bathroom mirrors it's a curiosity about what sort of face cream they use that I don't know about, and never about medication or hoping to find something embarassing.
I was on tour for several weeks and stayed on the floor and couches of various kind people, and it fascinated me that all these (like me) relatively poor artists and whatnot nevertheless had fancy shampoo (not hidden) or fancy soaps. I'm more curious about the ways people treat themselves than their hidden disorders.
posted by PersonAndSalt at 12:27 PM on January 15, 2010 [1 favorite]
I was on tour for several weeks and stayed on the floor and couches of various kind people, and it fascinated me that all these (like me) relatively poor artists and whatnot nevertheless had fancy shampoo (not hidden) or fancy soaps. I'm more curious about the ways people treat themselves than their hidden disorders.
posted by PersonAndSalt at 12:27 PM on January 15, 2010 [1 favorite]
I only snoop when I know the person well and expect them to have whatever it is I'm looking for or I am an (invited) extended guest at someone's place. I have looked in two medicine cabinets during my lifetime out of curiosity, and both were my best friends.
I did it for the very reason A Terrible Llama said -- to reassure myself that I'm not alone. It's a sad little thing to do, but I also fully expect people to do the same in my bathroom. It doesn't bug me. If there's something I really don't want someone to see in there, I put it under my bed or something.
I also do not let people I don't know in my apartment, no less my bathroom. It always creeps me out when people ask to use my bathroom (service people who are only going to be there maybe 30 minutes, friends of friends who are dropping me off), etc.
Journals and emails.. ehh, no not really. I value my privacy in those regards very highly so while sometimes I am incredibly curious, I would never want someone to do that to me. There's a girl my friends and I invite out of sympathy every once and awhile (she's an ex of a friend who no longer lives here), but whenever they get a text or are fidgeting on their phone or laptop, she is RIGHT THERE looking over their shoulder asking them what they're doing and "Oooh what is that icon!" "Who is firstName lastName?!"
I'm not sure where she ever got the idea that this was appropriate. That blatancy, to me, is far more invasive than secretly looking at my Tum, Tum-Tum Tums.
posted by june made him a gemini at 12:52 PM on January 15, 2010
I did it for the very reason A Terrible Llama said -- to reassure myself that I'm not alone. It's a sad little thing to do, but I also fully expect people to do the same in my bathroom. It doesn't bug me. If there's something I really don't want someone to see in there, I put it under my bed or something.
I also do not let people I don't know in my apartment, no less my bathroom. It always creeps me out when people ask to use my bathroom (service people who are only going to be there maybe 30 minutes, friends of friends who are dropping me off), etc.
Journals and emails.. ehh, no not really. I value my privacy in those regards very highly so while sometimes I am incredibly curious, I would never want someone to do that to me. There's a girl my friends and I invite out of sympathy every once and awhile (she's an ex of a friend who no longer lives here), but whenever they get a text or are fidgeting on their phone or laptop, she is RIGHT THERE looking over their shoulder asking them what they're doing and "Oooh what is that icon!" "Who is firstName lastName?!"
I'm not sure where she ever got the idea that this was appropriate. That blatancy, to me, is far more invasive than secretly looking at my Tum, Tum-Tum Tums.
posted by june made him a gemini at 12:52 PM on January 15, 2010
I'm baffled at how commonplace this is. I'm a very curious person, and have had to restrain myself from reading people's email or journals when I really wanted to -- but the medicine cabinet thing just never struck me as anything remotely worth investigating.
Maybe you, personally, are less exposed by your own medicine cabinet than in your own writings, so you find their writings interesting, but not their medicine cabinets?
As you've said, your medicine cabinet isn't a treasure trove of Secret Weirdness so you might assume other people's aren't, either.
Not saying your emails are. Just that there might be a connection.
posted by A Terrible Llama at 12:59 PM on January 15, 2010 [1 favorite]
Maybe you, personally, are less exposed by your own medicine cabinet than in your own writings, so you find their writings interesting, but not their medicine cabinets?
As you've said, your medicine cabinet isn't a treasure trove of Secret Weirdness so you might assume other people's aren't, either.
Not saying your emails are. Just that there might be a connection.
posted by A Terrible Llama at 12:59 PM on January 15, 2010 [1 favorite]
I think it has something to do with the thrill of doing something a little sneaky and getting away with it -- something you deep down know is naughty, but really doesn't hurt anyone.
Maybe this is just a matter of perspective, but to me the idea of a casual (or close) friend being tempted to read my journal is way more creepy than a casual friend being tempted to look in my medicine cabinet at a party.
And I have the same compulsion as bakerina to look behind the shower curtain because of a certain incident at a friend's house in high school that didn't involve psycho-killers (or anything else truly horrible) but was traumatic nonetheless.
posted by Brody's chum at 2:22 PM on January 15, 2010
Maybe this is just a matter of perspective, but to me the idea of a casual (or close) friend being tempted to read my journal is way more creepy than a casual friend being tempted to look in my medicine cabinet at a party.
And I have the same compulsion as bakerina to look behind the shower curtain because of a certain incident at a friend's house in high school that didn't involve psycho-killers (or anything else truly horrible) but was traumatic nonetheless.
posted by Brody's chum at 2:22 PM on January 15, 2010
It kind of confronts you. You wash your hands, you look at yourself in the mirror (etc.) and the that same mirror you're looking at is a little swinging door with things inside. I think people are just naturally curious, not necessarily looking to find your medications.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 2:45 PM on January 15, 2010
posted by Solon and Thanks at 2:45 PM on January 15, 2010
Seinfeld's "The Conversion" episode also discusses this issue.
posted by neworder7 at 3:25 PM on January 15, 2010
posted by neworder7 at 3:25 PM on January 15, 2010
I don't look in the cabinet, but if the shower curtain is pulled, I am compelled to check for bathers in the tub before I can pee.
Once I found a bathtub full of turtles whose home was being cleaned.
Once I found sufficient quantities of dead spiders to indicate they were the only householders to use the tub.
posted by Sallyfur at 7:47 PM on January 15, 2010 [1 favorite]
Once I found a bathtub full of turtles whose home was being cleaned.
Once I found sufficient quantities of dead spiders to indicate they were the only householders to use the tub.
posted by Sallyfur at 7:47 PM on January 15, 2010 [1 favorite]
I don't pay attention to the contents of my medicine cabinet (it's "what was on sale that week"), and so I don't really think about the contents of someone else's either - now that everyone mentions it I'm sure it would be interesting to see the value that different people put on different things, who uses what products and so on... but that's only interesting with strangers. And my friends are definitely not strangers.
Some people do big dinner parties, and I'd guess it's more relevant then - more appealing to look, since it gives you an insight into the private lives of these strangers who've cleaned up and polished everything so much for your arrival that you can't really see any humanity there, and more likely that someone else WILL look, either for that reason or because you can't know if someone has a drug problem.
posted by Lady Li at 11:12 PM on January 15, 2010
Some people do big dinner parties, and I'd guess it's more relevant then - more appealing to look, since it gives you an insight into the private lives of these strangers who've cleaned up and polished everything so much for your arrival that you can't really see any humanity there, and more likely that someone else WILL look, either for that reason or because you can't know if someone has a drug problem.
posted by Lady Li at 11:12 PM on January 15, 2010
I peek from time to time but never thought that people do it to steal meds. I thought the first person to suggest this was joking.
posted by saradarlin at 1:01 AM on January 16, 2010
posted by saradarlin at 1:01 AM on January 16, 2010
You'd have to be, to some extent or another, an addict to steal vicodin or whatever out of your friends' medicine cabinet. Casual drug users wouldn't do it. Of course, if you're the sort of person who pops a lot of pills, a lot of your friends probably are too, and you could probably just ask.
posted by DecemberBoy at 2:08 AM on January 16, 2010
posted by DecemberBoy at 2:08 AM on January 16, 2010
The only reason that I'd go into someone's medicine cabinet nowadays is if 1) I was visiting them overnight and needed something like aspirin or antacids and 2) it was the middle of the night and I didn't want to choose between waking them up and laying awake suffering. I've learned to keep this sort of thing in my dopp kit at all times, so it's largely a moot point. Occasionally I'll have to check the bathroom cabinets for toilet paper or something, but not often.
When I was younger, I was sort of fascinated with some of the things that I'd see in other people's bathrooms; I thought that a douche bag/nozzle combo was a hot water bottle with some sort of filter attachment on the other end of the hose before someone explained it to me. That actually discouraged my explorations, I think.
posted by Halloween Jack at 2:06 PM on January 18, 2010
When I was younger, I was sort of fascinated with some of the things that I'd see in other people's bathrooms; I thought that a douche bag/nozzle combo was a hot water bottle with some sort of filter attachment on the other end of the hose before someone explained it to me. That actually discouraged my explorations, I think.
posted by Halloween Jack at 2:06 PM on January 18, 2010
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by muddgirl at 8:51 AM on January 15, 2010