Help Me Help a Drunk Friend

December 22, 2009 3:03 PM

Where can I find drug and alcohol rehab and counseling here in San Diego with absolutely no funds.

I'm asking for a very dear friend who has had a rough couple of years and will soon be homeless and destitute without help.

He had a major injury at home, was laid off, has no health care and started drinking to replace his prescription pain meds. He's since wrecked his car while DUI and has to face those legal problems as well.

I really want to help but don't really know where to start. Talking with him now results in tears and denial. He's drinking 24/7 (vodka) and rarely sleeps. His family is tapped out financially.

Who should I call and what are other ways that I can help him out? It's just my non professional opinion, but considering that he can't even talk about things, let alone go try to get a job it seems like rehab might be his best option.

posted by snsranch to Health & Fitness (8 answers total)

Get your friend signed up for Mediaid if he's eligible (sounds like he is) so he can expand his health options. A brief search came up with the House of Metamorphosis which won't turn people away because of their inability to pay.

Of course, rehab doesn't really work until the person has hit bottom and admits that he has a problem. If he's fighting it, it won't work.

Hope that helps! Good luck.
posted by inturnaround at 3:14 PM on December 22, 2009

You could go to an AA meeting and ask them if they can do anything to help out.

Legend has it that alcoholics tend to respond better when "one of them" talks to them.
posted by krilli at 4:20 PM on December 22, 2009

seconding aa. ask your friend to put aside preconceptions and just go. to. one. meeting. the guiding principle of aa is to extend the hand of help where it's needed. that does not mean that they're going to give your friend money, a job, etc. but s/he will find people who have been in the same situation & worse and who figured out how to navigate out of that hole. bonus: drunks actually like other drunks. they refer them to employers, tip them off to housing opportunities (even when those are 'you can crash at my place tonight'), and generally will help in whatever capacity they can. added bonus: first timers look around and realize that getting clean & getting back on track IS possible. even a little bit of hope is priceless when you're staring at the bottom rung.

good luck to your friend & good vibes to you for wanting to help.
posted by msconduct at 4:30 PM on December 22, 2009

Response by poster: Hey, thanks folks. AA and House of Metamorphosis look like great places for me to ask questions to hopefully get something started for him.
posted by snsranch at 5:04 PM on December 22, 2009

For the San Diego specific, what about St Vincent de Paul/Father Joe's Villages? I double-checked, and not only do they have shelters and transitional housing, they also have chemical dependency programs. See here for more (a few more) details.
posted by librarylis at 6:03 PM on December 22, 2009

Please also note that AA and other 12-step meetings are often quite varied. E.g., this group meeting over here on that day will be quite different from another group meeting. The demographics are different, but it tends to have more to do with the "personality" of the meeting. So if the first one is a disaster, it may be the group or it may be AA :)

What I'm trying to say: Shop around. At least a little bit. Not too much.
posted by krilli at 6:31 PM on December 22, 2009

You may also try calling CRASH, which offers both outpatient and residential treatment options. Best of luck to your friend.
posted by vespertine at 2:34 AM on December 23, 2009

Response by poster: Thanks again, folks, there are many more options than I realized. I appreciate it!
posted by snsranch at 3:20 PM on December 23, 2009