Diamond Heist Help Needed!
May 6, 2009 1:01 AM   Subscribe

Diamond Heist Filter: I'm writing a crime story and I could use some technical info so things sound realistic -- do you know gems or security systems or African languages?

The first thing I'm trying to find out is how much the stolen diamonds in the story could be worth. I understand that the value would be affected by many variables, I'm just looking for a guide. If you were offered a million dollars worth of uncut diamonds of varying quality and size, how big a package would you expect that to be?

The second thing I'm looking for is a technical term for a device one would use to disable/crack a keypad alarm system. Do those thingys actually exist or are they just a figment of cinematic imagination?

And, uh, I don't suppose anyone speaks either Lingala, or Luganda, or any other Central/West African language? Obscure is fine. I'm looking for a translation for anything like the following dialogue:

"I don't remember. What did you want me to say?"
"Don't worry. Just pretend to kick him."
"Thanks for hiring us. I hope this was scary enough."
posted by xz to Grab Bag (18 answers total)
 
Maybe this isn't what you want to hear, and perhaps I'll be modded for writing this, but if I was reading a story about a diamond heist, I would really like it not to be about uncut diamonds, not a million dollars worth of uncut diamonds, not with a key character from Africa, and not breaking into a safe. It would make an interesting read to steal something else, to not get that something else out of the safe, and for the key character not to be african.

Some stories change it around so that the diamonds have to be put back in the safe.

The book could be based flu-resistant pig smuggling Mexican farmers. How could would that be? :)
posted by devnull at 1:31 AM on May 6, 2009


s/How could/How cool/
posted by devnull at 1:32 AM on May 6, 2009


Response by poster: it sounds like a traditional story, but it isn't, devnull. it's about greed and it's just built around a traditional idea. the real thieves in the story aren't the Africans. and, as it turns out, the diamonds aren't even diamonds.
posted by xz at 1:37 AM on May 6, 2009


In that case - looking forward to it!
posted by devnull at 1:45 AM on May 6, 2009


In terms of the technical details Wired's account of the recent diamond heist in Antwerp might make interesting preparatory reading (it was discussed in the blue). Wired also did an interesting article on progress in artificial diamonds a few years ago.

The first article should help to give you some ideas of the physical size of the haul. It also has details on how alarm systems were defeated. It might give you some idea of values.
posted by rongorongo at 1:59 AM on May 6, 2009 [1 favorite]


Be aware that the many, many duffel bags that were filled in the Antwerp heist were not filled only with diamonds, but with large quantities of gold and silver and other precious metals and certificates and other elements of wealth.
posted by disillusioned at 2:53 AM on May 6, 2009


Best answer: Ok a friend of mine runs a shop in Antwerp, and is a de Beers sightholder (i.e., someone who is allowed to purchase stones directly with de Beers).

Most of her transactions are roughly $10M and up. I recall her mentioning the boxes she gets from de Beers (containing her allotment of uncut diamonds) is a somewhat larger than a cigar box, maybe twice the size. This came up in the context of getting me asking her how she got her stones back to Antwerp from London (where the sight takes place); she takes them carry on, not a problem. I bounced her an email but she's currently in Africa and according to her OOO unreachable.

So $1M uncut could conceivably be a very small package. And since $1M ain't what it used to be (even in Africa, I've worked down there) maybe you'd like to up your numbers to something that would be both meaningful and motivating?

I can't do any of the Bantu based languages, but if it helps in Afrikanns we'd have

Ek kan dit niet onthou nie Wat wil jy dat ek se
Geen probleem. Doe asof je hom een skop geef
Ek wil jou bedank voor ons in diens neem Ek hoop dit was angstig genoeg.

This is very very rough, and I'd welcome correction from anyone more current in the language (and wouldn't mind seeing either Lingala, or Luganda myself, fascinating languages to listen to).

Hope this helps!
posted by Mutant at 3:34 AM on May 6, 2009


Response by poster: thanks mutant! that's helpful. ideally, in my story, it's more like $8M worth of diamonds, but i wasn't sure if that was "duffel bags" or a box. i'll read that wired story tomorrow, rongorongo.

thanks also for the afrikaans. not ideal, but better than nothing.
posted by xz at 4:11 AM on May 6, 2009


As a story teller, you'd be much better off using story telling techniques to communicate your booty's worth. In addition to leaving it up to the audiences' imagination, you do not date your story based on what, in the future, may be an insignificant amount of money. (For instance, you reference a million in diamonds--to a thief, that's nothing. Why? Because a thief only gets dimes on the dollar for stolen goods so a million in diamonds is $200k to a thief. Not really worth the effort or the time.)

It's much more effective to use suggestion:

MAN #1
Do you know what those diamonds would be worth?

MAN #2
I took the job, didn't I?

Or whatever... that makes the value of the diamonds be whatever the value the viewer/reader thinks they're worth to take a similar risk. That's your ideal amount and it's going to be different for everybody. Throw in some crazy high specific amount and you run the risk of embarrassing yourself--go too low and the viewer doesn't believe the story.

Same goes with your box: "He couldn't believe so valuable a booty could fit into a box he could effortlessly hold in his hands." The box dimensions again will rest on the reader's imagination and will not date your story as the value of diamonds fluctuates.

As for the name of your security thingy... again, you're worrying needlessly.

Tom approaches the door. It's got a 9-digit, 4-letter display and a slot on the bottom. He slides a white plastic card into the slot. A rainbow-colored ribbon cable runs from the card to a box in his hand. The box has a toggle-switch. Tom throws the switch. The machine comes to life, sending a series of numbers across the keypad's display.

No one cares what it's called. In fact, if you find out what it's called it's very likely this will happen:

Tom slides the whirlygig into the keypad...

And your reader wonders what the fuck a whirlygig is, immediately being taken out of the action.

Lastly, as a side note, in the film Way of the Gun, there's a point where the kidnappers ask for a ridiculous amount of money (I don't remember the figure, but lets say $20M) in small unmarked bills. To which the handler replies, "That'd weigh about 1.5 tonnes" or some such thing, revealing the ignorance of the kidnappers. I thought it was a pretty funny scene.
posted by You Should See the Other Guy at 5:29 AM on May 6, 2009


Best answer: The second thing I'm looking for is a technical term for a device one would use to disable/crack a keypad alarm system. Do those thingys actually exist or are they just a figment of cinematic imagination?

In short, it depends on the details of the alarm system, and your willingness to accept a bit of artistic license.

Suggestion 1: In some books security systems have 'manufacturer override' codes, a code known to the manufacturers which deactivates the alarm just like the owner's code does. So someone with this information (perhaps a secret government agent) can break into a house, deactivate the alarm, do whatever they want, then reactivate the alarm just as if they knew the alarm code.

Do real world security systems have such codes? Hard to know, but it would be a believably claim for the purposes of your story.

Suggestion 2: If it's just an alarm with a sounder box, like some people have at home, someone can get up to it with a ladder and a drill, drill a hole in the box, and fill it with injected, expanding foam insulation. Result: Sounder will not sound.

Suggestion 2b: If it's a solar-powered wireless alarm sounder, a bit of duct tape over the solar panels and it won't have the power to sound. I've seen solar-powered wireless alarms where the sounder hasn't functioned, and there has been no indication of this on the control panel.

Suggestion 3: If it's an alarm system which can be remotely monitored/which can automatically call the police (something like BT Redcare) they will detect things like cutting the telephone lines - but if you trigger a few false alarms by leaving windows open and similar, the police will stop coming out.

Suggestion 4: If the alarm system has a remote disarm key fob, it could run on the KeeLoq encryption system, which has security problems; a knowledgeable person could make a duplicate key fob. But they might have to dramatically follow someone with a key fob around, gathering data ready for their attack.

Suggestion 5: If it's a security system with on-site guards monitoring it, if a sensor regularly raises false alarms they tend to ignore it; or if most of their people are busy responding to another incident, it will take them a while to send someone to check the alarm out.

Suggestion 6: Most high-tech encryption and security systems are still vulnerable to bribery, threats of physical violence, and/or sufficiently clever lying.
posted by Mike1024 at 5:44 AM on May 6, 2009


Be aware that the many, many duffel bags that were filled in the Antwerp heist were not filled only with diamonds, but with large quantities of gold and silver and other precious metals and certificates and other elements of wealth.

At current prices, and according to my calculations, US$1,000,000 of gold would weigh 34.5 kg (about 75 lbs, and the sort of weight where a fit man will want to get a good grip and check his posture before lifting) and have a volume of about 1.8 litres (about half a US Gallon, and the size of a large supermarket container of milk).

My point being: If you had a duffel bag full of gold, it would either be a very small duffel bag, or it would be a duffel bag that needed several people to lift it.
posted by Mike1024 at 6:03 AM on May 6, 2009


Best answer: I've got Swahili - it's spoken as a second or third language in a lot of Central African countries....

"I don't remember. What did you want me to say?"
"Don't worry. Just pretend to kick him."
"Thanks for hiring us. I hope this was scary enough."

"Sikumbuki. Unanitaka kusema nini?"
"Hakuna shida. Lakini kujifanya kumpiga."
"Tutakushukuru kutuajiri. Natumaini hii inawashtua ya kutosha." Alternately, you could say "Tutashukuru kutuajiri. Natumaini umeogopa ya kutosha." The first one is "I hope this scares you enough." and the second is "I hope you are afraid enough."
posted by ChuraChura at 8:09 AM on May 6, 2009


(INANSS? I'm not a native Swahili speaker - so if anyone needs to correct me, go for it!)
posted by ChuraChura at 8:10 AM on May 6, 2009


Oh, bother. Sorry - I should have read it over. It should say "Tunakushukuru" - sorry!
posted by ChuraChura at 8:13 AM on May 6, 2009


How'd you choose Luganda or Lingala? If you tell us the locale, we might be able to suggest a more accurate language.
posted by semacd at 10:22 AM on May 6, 2009


Response by poster: Thanks for the Swahili, ChuraChura; that's awesome to have. The reason I'm trying to avoid that particular language is that it is more likely an American would understand it. That's why I picked Lingala and Luganda. Two languages that a group of recent immigrants might reasonably have in common even if they didn't arrive together, and ones which it would be vastly unlikely an American would understand. Also, if you do check this post again; how would either of those last two options change if it was "scares them" or "hope she is afraid".

You Should See the Other Guy. uh. thanks. i'm glad you're a writer and have your own wonderful ideas. unfortunately, they have nothing to do with the project i'm working on. thanks for trying to be helpful, tho.

Mike1024; that's something to work with, thanks!

Semacd; the project is still in first draft and it's easy to change, but currently I was picturing the characters who speak this dialogue being from Uganda or the Congo. I know there are a ton of languages spoken in that part of Africa and any would work (or any language up through Central Africa around to the West). the whole point is that when the dialogue is first heard, no one understands what's being said and then, much later in flashback, when it's translated, the scene completely changes in meaning.
posted by xz at 3:55 PM on May 6, 2009


If they're Ugandan or Congolese, they'd almost definitely speak Swahili, if you can't get any Luganda or Lingala, and though Americans are certainly more likely to speak Swahili than Lingala or Luganda, it's still not the most common of languages (unless this is a concern with a character who'd be living in East or Central Africa ... then they'd probably have picked up at least a little).

"Tunakushukuru kutuajiri. Natumaini hii inawashtua ya kutosha" would stay the same for "I hope this scares them enough."

"I hope she is afraid" - "Natumaini yeye anaogopa."

Good luck!
posted by ChuraChura at 4:41 PM on May 6, 2009


The person who answered about the cigar sized box holding a million dollars of rough diamonds is correct. Of course, polished diamonds have even more value density, so a million dollars of them would take up significantly less space. When I was a diamond salesman, I used to travel all over the US (and world) carrying diamonds in a black leather pouch inside my pants. I would typically carry about a million dollars worth of goods. Of course, if your character is dealing in large "special" pieces of rough, then you could easily get a million dollars into a one big piece of rough (or one medium sized piece that is a fancy color).
posted by TruthAboutDiamonds at 3:41 AM on September 8, 2009


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