Learning to love the singing fat ladies

January 16, 2009 10:54 AM

Mr 26.2 is going with me to the opera next week. I love opera, but he's never been or heard much. How can I help him to enjoy the performance?

It's the San Diego Opera's performance of Tosca [Warning: Music]. We have great seats. This will be my first time seeing the San Diego Opera.

If it helps, Mr 26.2 is a wonderful singer. He's a foreign movie and film noir fan. He doesn't speak Italian, but he's fluent in Spanish and may be able to piece together some of the words. We've got a few shots at this since he's agreed to see 3 performances with me this year. It would be awesome if he really enjoyed them instead of just being there as my arm candy.

posted by 26.2 to media & arts (17 comments total)

Perhaps you could rent a DVD of the opera so that he'd be familiar with the plot and music beforehand? After you go to the live performance, you could compare the singers, the productions, etc.
posted by Bromius at 11:02 AM on January 16

Make sure he's familiar with the story before you go. Even if he spoke Italian, it's still harder to follow an opera anyway, and knowing what's going on helps tremendously.
posted by crickets at 11:07 AM on January 16 [1 favorite]

I am not a fan of opera, and know little to nothing about it. So, I'll put myself in your husband's shoes. Obviously, I have no idea what his personality is like, but if I was in his shoes, here's what I would want:

Tell me a brief synopsis of the plot, or better, point me to a website or book that has these points. Then, during the performance, don't try to explain anything unless I ask. For me, nothing is more irritating than being at a performance or movie, and having someone coach me through it, or tell me I "really have to see this part." Let him experience it at his own level of understanding. Perhaps before going in, you can ask him what level of info-sharing he wants.

After the performance is the time to discuss the subtleties and plot twists, and sub-texts.

Then, let him like it or not like it. His agreement to see 3 performances is great. He may learn to love it during this year. Or, he may just be going to support your interests, and may end up just enduring the performances, which is fine also. Being arm candy for someone you love is a noble task.

I'm more of a movie buff, and I have certain films that I want all my friends to see, and get very frustrated when they just don't get it, and if I could only explain it all to them, then they would see what a fantastic film this is, and... and... yeah, that gets old really fast.
posted by Fuzzy Skinner at 11:09 AM on January 16 [2 favorites]

Jeer if you like, but the scene in Pretty Woman where Gere takes Roberts to a performance of La Traviata [La Traviata! Get it?!] struck me as written by someone who must really like opera. I liked the spirit of its advice, which was - as I recall it - not to worry much about the words being sung or even the plot they're (slowly) advancing. [Let's be honest: Neither are why anyone loves opera.] Just focus on the sounds produced by the music and the singing and see if they affect you in someplace you may not have known you had. And, if he's an admirer of athletic performance, he might have the additional appreciation of watching high-level professionals [I'm guessing the San Diego might be the opera world's equivalent of AAA baseball team] demonstrating their hard-won skills. [As Renee Fleming reminds us: opera singers have to physically build the very "instrument" of which they're then demanded to become virtuoso "players".]
posted by Joe Beese at 11:12 AM on January 16 [1 favorite]

I'm guessing the San Diego might be the opera world's equivalent of AAA baseball team

This reminds me of the Baltimore Opera's ad campaign when I lived there in the 90s : "The Baltimore Opera, it's not as bad as you think." They weren't really bad, but they had too much world-class competition nearby at Wolftrap and the Kennedy Center to deal with.

To answer your question, a lot of it depends on your husband's personality. I would try to get him the synopsis of the plot like everyone else said, and then let him enjoy the show.

It's great of him to go with you, however. Not everyone's lucky enough to have a partner who will do that.
posted by overhauser at 11:27 AM on January 16 [1 favorite]

I love Opera and the SD company looks like a good one. You're really lucky.

As others have said, it's good to know the plot going in. Most opera houses (all the ones I've been to.) Will have a plot synopsis in the handbill. So, getting there a few minutes early should give him enough time to read through it. Alternatively the little guides on the SDO website should be enough. You don't have to know more than the general outline.

If you have a really good stage manager and production, the costumes and set will be absolutely beautiful. Prompt him to pay attention to how the scenery changes to match the mood and feel of the scene. In a good Opera hoouse a forest is never just a forest. As I think of it opera is really a multimedia experience there is more to its beauty than bel canto (though, of course, that's the big attraction).

My other piece of advice is to show him a comedy. I find those much easier to enjoy for a first timer. I've never seen Don Quixote, but if that's not a comedy then SDO doesn't seem to have any this season, that's a shame. However, Rigolleto is abosolutely fantastic. It's one of my favorites. It's classic opera (with a capital "O"), with intrigue, plots, betrayal, loss and tragedy. A gem, truly. You have to take him to that one!
posted by oddman at 11:34 AM on January 16

He doesn't speak Italian, but he's fluent in Spanish and may be able to piece together some of the words.

Note that supertitles are in use at the Civic Theatre, as they are at most opera houses these days.
posted by Johnny Assay at 11:40 AM on January 16 [2 favorites]

I'm not a huge fan, but Mrs Mars is actively pursuing a career as an opera singer. So, I get to see a *lot* of opera. Here's what I've found helps me to get the most enjoyment:
Don't listen to the opera before hand. The music is the best part of the experience so leave that to be a surprise. Instead get to know the plot of the opera very well. Break it down act by act. Here is a good synopsis.
That way, when the opera is running, and he's starting to get restless, he'll have a good idea of exactly where in the story you are, and when the next act break is likely to be. Your program will have a shorter version of the synopsis, so he can use this to remind himself of the plot points.
Keep some mints or small candy on hand. It's nice to have something discreet to munch on.
Get up and walk around during the act breaks. Get a glass of champaign.
Tosca's got a great villain, so try to get into the emotions of the thing. Hate the smug bastard. Cheer when he gets what's coming to him.

Above all, don't take it too seriously. If you don't like a singer, whisper to your hubby, that tenor really sucks and looks like a water buffalo stuffed into a suit. You're there to enjoy yourself. Too many people view going to the opera like going to a funeral.
posted by Eddie Mars at 11:42 AM on January 16 [1 favorite]

I agree with both the advice to get the plot beforehand and with Joe Beese. Meaning, let him become familiar with the plot so that while you are there he can just enjoy it (or not) for the beauty of the music and the whole experience.

Tosca is beautiful and dramatic and sad. E lucevan le stelle (at the end just before SPOLER!!!! she falls into the Tiber) is one of my favorite, uh, songs ever (opera or otherwise). If Mr. OP appreciates the arts, I bet he'll enjoy it. Or not.
posted by Pax at 11:45 AM on January 16

If you don't like a singer, whisper to your hubby, that tenor really sucks and looks like a water buffalo stuffed into a suit.

Eeek - no. Well, I mean - save that for intermission. Do NOT even try to whisper during the performance. It's extremely rude, and opera houses and symphony concerts are one place where your fellow audience members WILL tell you to "SHH!"

William Berger has some books out that are really good introductions to the major opera composers. "Puccini Without Excuses", "Verdi With a Vengeance," and "Wagner Without Fear." He gives a brief biography of the composer, summaries of all their main works, along with notes about things like which arias are the most famous, things to look for in a production, some opinions about different recordings, etc. They'd be great reading for your hubby if he starts to take more interest in opera-going.
posted by dnash at 12:45 PM on January 16

I've been to one opera, and the abject misery of this experience had nothing to do with the music itself, but with the fact that I was jammed into an uncomfortable seat in an overheated opera theater. It was bad. It was so bad the heat in cramped conditions put me into a semi-sleeping state, which apparently also involved snoring. It was so bad we left during the first intermission. So I guess my advice is "dress comfortably."
posted by infinitywaltz at 12:58 PM on January 16

I've only been to the opera once (while I was in high school, when we were studying Madame Butterfly), and I was led to understand that there are usually surtitles.
posted by minus zero at 1:15 PM on January 16

I like the recommendation of picking a comedy over a tragedy (and since he's agreed to three, then hopefully he'll get a taste of some operatic comedy, which is a very easy way to make someone a believer in opera). For an example of why this is a useful introduction to opera, check out this clip of Natalie Dessay in "La Fille Du Regiment" by Donizetti. Not only is it amazing singing, but it's just really good comedic acting. It's very accessible. (On review, it appears that you'll have to go elsewhere for comedy! San Diego apparently is not a fan of comedy. Opera is serious business!)

If he's a singer himself, then reading up on the demands of the roles will help him appreciate the performance more. The clip above shows Dessay bouncing around the stage in acrobatic fashion while still performing ridiculously well. She's also notorious for doing a brilliant job with the crazy scene in "Lucia di Lammermoor."

Which is, all of course, to say: Make sure you're seeing a good production with people in appropriate roles for them. That might sound hard to do, but a bit of research will go a long way. If I were going to see San Diego this season, I'd be most interested in seeing Denyce Graves and Anthony Dean Griffey (Don Quijote and Peter Grimes, respectively) - but those are just two people I've heard applauded who I'd like to see perform myself.

You might also want to find out any of the quirky things about opera first to vet them. It may seem like splitting hairs, but I HATE countertenors, so when I went to see a production of Handel's "Julio Cesare," I was really bothered by the countertenor singing all evening. Since you know what is coming up, you might share some of the clip with Mr. 26.2 and see if anything strikes him as particularly awful or interesting.
posted by greekphilosophy at 1:16 PM on January 16

I should clarify, I HAVE seen Anthony Dean Griffey - in 2008 at the Philadelphia production of "Fidelio" - and he was very good, even if the role wasn't particularly suited for him, and even if the production values of the performance overall were...bad. It sounds like San Diego wont have that problem though after reading about their setting of Peter Grimes. Philadelphia used dollar store banners and old pillow cases for their props and costumes. I was not impressed - but my negative reaction should not reflect poorly on Mr. Griffey at all.
posted by greekphilosophy at 1:23 PM on January 16

I would try and play before hand one or two of the most famous songs from Tosca ahead of time for him, that way when they do it he'll recognize the song and appreciate it a bit more (and understand what it's about). When I first saw Turandot I got very excited when nessun dorma came on and I had no idea what it was about until I saw the show. Similarly, maybe try and see some other very famous ones like Barber of Seville or the Marriage of Figaro or Don Giovanni, those are famous for a reason.

I'd nth comedies, which are generally easier to get into. Also, Puccini is a good choice for first timers.
posted by Large Marge at 5:13 PM on January 16

I bemusedly skimmed the intellectual parsing of this question but didnt see the obvious answer. Opera glasses. Boys love binoculars. Spring a pair on him by surprise just as the curtain goes up. Guaranteed he will enjoy the show...and not just because he has a close up of the heroines impressively heaving bossoms.
posted by Muirwylde at 5:28 PM on January 18

Thanks to everyone for the advice. He had a really good time.

We did review the story of the first 2 acts, but not the final ending. I'd forgotten all about the supertitles since I ignore them entirely, but he said that they were occasionally useful to him. We also attended the pre-show lecture given by the Opera's Director of Education which was pretty useful.

Oh and next time, I'm totally getting him some opera glasses.

Thanks again!
posted by 26.2 at 10:50 AM on January 29