gift for the wife

November 19, 2008 9:49 AM

LoveMyWifeFilter: My wife and I are about to have our first child and I want to get her something special. What are your ideas?

Our first child is expected to arrive on December 15th. There is a good chance that the baby will be born close to Christmas. I don’t want this gift to be a Christmas gift or necessarily baby related. I really want to get her something special to show her how much I love her and how proud I am of how she handled this pregnancy (we have a tough pregnancy history).

I am looking for any ideas regardless of whether they are expensive or cheap, hand made or bought. I thought about jewelry with the birthstones of the three of us or an album of pictures of her through out the pregnancy (I took one picture of her belly each week). Although these are good ideas, I don’t think they really capture what I am looking for.

I would love to hear what others have done for their partners in the same situation or what you would like if you knew a gift was coming your way.

Thanks!

posted by birdlips to human relations (15 answers total)

I don't have any specific suggestions for you, but the very nice thing you're looking to do is actually a trend with a name (a terrible name, but a name nonetheless) - google "push presents" for ideas from the media and places trying to sell you stuff.
posted by ferociouskitty at 10:15 AM on November 19, 2008 [1 favorite]

I think jewelry is a great idea. I would want a present given in this spirit to last a long time.

Another possibility is something like a gift certificate for a massage and half-day at the spa, to be redeemed something like 3 or 6 months after the baby comes. But that gift is more like "I know things are about to get super-hectic" than like "I love you so much and am so proud of you."
posted by salvia at 10:16 AM on November 19, 2008

Well, my wife wanted all the things she wasn't supposed ot have when she was pregnant...

wine
sushi
lunchmeat
soft serve ice cream
etc

Maybe a gift basket with the things she has missed?
posted by ian1977 at 10:18 AM on November 19, 2008

Jewelry, unless she's really a tomboy and would never wear it. In that case, go with ian1977's suggestion.
posted by desjardins at 10:30 AM on November 19, 2008

Check out this previous post
posted by rmless at 10:31 AM on November 19, 2008

I think a very nice framed, matted portrait of her pregnant would be in the spirit of what you are trying to do. Something to hang on the wall in a place of pride--not a photo album.

Also, a handwritten note expressing how you feel about her and this moment in your life is perfect all on it's own and a keepsake in itself.

I personally find expensive jewelry a little "cold" and impersonal for an emotional present, but I know that 99.99% of women would disagree with me. Maybe if you are artistic, you could design a piece of jewelry with a jewelry designer? That makes it a little more personal.

Good luck with the birth!
posted by tk at 10:35 AM on November 19, 2008 [1 favorite]

wow, I had no idea there was a term for this. I learned something new today :D
posted by birdlips at 10:36 AM on November 19, 2008

birdlips, congratulations!

Dec. 15th is my due date as well!

One of the best gifts I was given at my shower was a gift from my aunt. It's a really, simple but beautiful bracelet that says "Mom" on it. It was such a great gift and I intend on wearing it on my way home from the hospital. Really, I almost cried when I opened it I found it so thoughtful and incredible. So, if you're going with jewelry, I think something like that would be great.

I also recommend setting her up with some massages. If my husband booked or got me a gift certificate for a massage, I would be over the moon. I would get her one before the baby comes and one for the first month after the baby is here. Look for a massage therapist who works specifically with prenatal and/or postpartum women as they will likely be the best for her right now.

A nice romantic dinner out before the baby comes would also be very nice, or even a romantic dinner at home. Something to just spend some time together where it really is the two of you for one of the last times.

The last thing I would suggest is surprising her with a great bath at home when she comes home from work. In all seriousness, run a warm (not hot!!!) bath, fill it with bubbles or her favorite body wash, light some candles, get some nice soothing music playing and serve her some sparkling juice/cider, tea or something she likes to drink and then snuggle her in a really comfy bathrobe and slippers, put on her favorite movie and just hang out for awhile together.

(And just in case, should my husband swing by this AskMe, *HINT*)
posted by zizzle at 10:48 AM on November 19, 2008

My wife saw a family member wearing a necklace with two of these Helen Ficalora charms on it, one with the initial of the new baby's name and the other the MOM charm, and immediately fell in love with it; I got her both charms when our daughter was born in March, and she's totally over the moon about the necklace. She gets lots of comments on it, too, and our daughter LOVES playing with the charms when my wife is holding her.

Just a thought; it worked out great in this household. :)
posted by delfuego at 11:20 AM on November 19, 2008 [1 favorite]

A gift-certificate for 10 hours of baby-sitting?
posted by peewinkle at 11:23 AM on November 19, 2008

Charm bracelet charm bracelet charm bracelet - if you look at my AskMe answer history, I know I say this a LOT, but I think it's such a fabulous present. Giving her a charm bracelet with a new baby birthstone charm, or an initial charm (if you know what you will name your baby), or a big, round womanly pearl, or some other thing, and then you can add to it for lots of different occasions. If your baby is a girl baby you should buy one for her, too.
posted by ersatzkat at 11:35 AM on November 19, 2008

Charm bracelet is a great idea. Look into Pandora beads if she isn't into the jangly kind of charms. These are charm beads that you can buy for special occasions and customize into a beautiful keepsake. I also have the Helen Ficalora charms on a necklace and get comments on it EVERY day. I wish I could say my husband bought it but I got it as a me present!! My first baby's birthstone was pearls so my hubby got me a pearl bracelet as a gift. One of the most special things I own. You are a thoughtful partner to be putting so much thought into this and are going to be a great Dad!! Best of luck!!
posted by pearlybob at 11:57 AM on November 19, 2008

In my experience, it was nice to know that my husband appreciated the effort that went into the actual labor, but also that he recognized that even with the new identity of "mother" I was still the same person. So while I did receive beautiful jewelry, he also made sure that I took time for myself post-partum; sent me to a coffee shop, bought me a book etc. It was the little things he did and said that were worth the most. But don't get me wrong; the jewelry and the spa treatments were aces too.
posted by Mrs. Green at 2:17 PM on November 19, 2008 [1 favorite]

My grandmother died recently and going through her things I found a letter that my grandfather had written her after the birth of my mother. I never met my grandfather but it was so sweet to see him through the letter. It was very heartfelt and loving, acknowledging past difficulties and promising his commitment to her and to their child. My friend who translated the letter with me almost started crying and expressed to her husband how much she'd love something like that. Now I'm so grateful to have it too.
posted by Salamandrous at 8:30 PM on November 26, 2008

For those that many be interested in an update.

I took the advice of a few people in here. I Wrote her a letter on long lasting cotton paper, got her a full day at a spa and finished off with a sushi lunch (something she was craving the entire time).

She loved it and she was very grateful.

Our pregnancy went well and the baby is healthy!

Thanks!
posted by birdlips at 9:01 AM on January 7, 2009