How does one make the transition between "college student" and business professional" without being wasteful?

September 6, 2008 9:22 PM

How does one make the transition between "college student" and business professional" without being wasteful?

My cousin recently took a nice job out west- something that is career-worthy. She's still living like a college student (ie: computing while sitting on the floor, instinctively buying cheaper things because they're cheap, etc).

How can she move from that "college student" mindset without being wasteful with her money?

posted by DonSlice to work & money (23 comments total)

I guess I'd want to know why she should move from that mindset, because I don't understand the problem. To me, the state of being known as "business professional" depends on how one conducts themself at work, not at home.

Is she unhappy living like a college student?
posted by zippy at 9:32 PM on September 6, 2008

"Business professional" weren't her words, they were mine. It's more a question of "how does she go from buying cheap items to 'get by' and start buying more permanent items of quality without wasting her money?"
posted by DonSlice at 9:36 PM on September 6, 2008

She'll move on once her peer group moves on; it doesn't happen overnight. For now, she should get reasonably good classic work clothes and shoes and be sure she shows up on time, clean and ready everyday.

Beyond that, who cares if she is extra frugal? As long as she's putting that extra money away intelligently, it's great that she's being frugal.

If you're looking for some quick ways to make her place more homey (maybe things the family could kick in for) basics are:
Kitchen/dining table and four-six chairs
Bedframe and mattress
Enough presentable dishes (incl at least cheap wineglasses) to entertain a few people
Enough kitchen prep basics that she can make a meal to entertain (good pot, good pan, cutting board, good knife, colander, a couple of kitchen towels, whatever else comes to mind)
Couch or other living room furniture to entertain
Lamps as needed
Bookcases and dressers/hangers for the closet rather than just piles on the floor
Curtains, area rugs, houseplants are the next level.

On preview, are you asking for names of stores she should be shopping at?
posted by LobsterMitten at 9:36 PM on September 6, 2008

The first thing a business professional learns is "don't fix what ain't broke."
posted by Class Goat at 9:40 PM on September 6, 2008

i still live like a college student, 4 years out of school. nothing wrong with that, if it saves money.
I'm going back to school full-time next year so I need to stay frugal.
Let her be. Just because some people don't buy into consumerism doesn't mean they are not successful in their fields.
posted by spacefire at 9:41 PM on September 6, 2008

I agree with LobsterMitten... she'll move 'on' when her peer group moves on. It's unbelievable how your friends' habits influence your behavior.
posted by sandmanwv at 9:44 PM on September 6, 2008

Last summer I finished school, and coincidentally enough took a nice job out West, something that is career-worthy. It turns out that it's not gonna be my career, *fingers crossed* law school next year, but that's not the point.

I'm currently in a mix of living still like a college student and being wasteful, so I think I'm all set up for explaining this one. First of all, the most important thing you didn't mention: what kind of place is she living in? If it's a furnished apartment, or shared spaces, then it's actually quite reasonable not to buy many expensive things: why get a nice _____ that doesn't match with the place she'll be living for a while?

If, like me, she's in a semi-furnished place (my situation was that my bedroom/bathroom is unfurnished, the kitchen/living room is done), then the best way has been to realize that I'm going to own these objects for quite a while. For example, when I bought my bookshelf, I made sure that the back was solid wood, not that crappy particleboard shit (Which is my #1 advice for house-furnishing).

Secondly, she'll have to learn that, well, she can buy things she thinks she needs. Being a little impulsive with small purchases might be enough to get into the mindset without going into terrible debt, e.g. I bought a decanter because I thought "Hey, people come over and I like scotch!" $30, but I would never have bought it in school because, well, that's a week of food.

And Nthing both the fact that as long as she works professionally, she'll be fine (which is an interesting transition in its own right, but never mind that), and that she'll slowly move on with her friends. My two old housemates are now international grad students [I go 4,000 km and still end up being the closest to home, that's so not cool], so in some ways I feel as if I've been the one having to 'grow up' first. It just kind of happens, nothing to worry about.
posted by Lemurrhea at 10:03 PM on September 6, 2008

It happens in time; I'm not sure it's something that should be actively pursued.

The realization that ”holy cow, I don't have to buy the cheapest [whatever] — I can afford nice stuff now!” is one that you need to sort of arrive at on your own, and on your own schedule. And only if you want to.

I'm going to generalize a little based on my own experience and that of my friends/colleagues: I think what does it for a lot of people is being around people who are no longer in the college-student mindset. It's your surroundings and people you interact with on a daily basis that drive most people's idea of what's normal.

As your sister starts to spend more time with people who have nice apartments and furniture and all the other trappings of a ”business professional's” lifestyle, I suspect she'll probably start to feel like upgrading. (Or maybe she'll decide she doesn't want to / care, in which case bravo for her.)

At any rate, it's not a process I would try to rush or nudge along, if I were you; it's something that'll happen on its own, and really the slower the better. I can't see any real long-term downside to having cheap furniture and living uber-frugally for a few more years, but getting even a little overwhelmed with the feeling of having money can lead to decades of consumer debt. (And I know people who did just that, right out of college. Ouch.)

Also, the income and buying-power bump experienced by new college grads when they get their first ”real job” is, percent-wise, the biggest that most people experience in their lifetime. And if perceived wealth is basically income over expenses, it's also the ”richest” that most people will ever feel. That feeling stops when your expenses increase to match your income, IMO.

Anyway, to bluntly answer your question, hanging out with people who are in the same career track but a few years removed from college will probably spur your cousin into realizing her options.
posted by Kadin2048 at 10:15 PM on September 6, 2008 [1 favorite has favorites]

I think you've got the wrong idea. Buying into consumerism isn't going to make anybody happy, and spending is the worst possible way to plan for the future.

I'm eight years out of school and I still buy cheap stuff. I put lots of my pay into my 401k, save even more as IRAs and cash, and still when I plug the numbers into retirement calculators everything says I'll be poor if I ever stop working. Then I look at my neighbors with their nice cars and nice furniture and credit card debt and dismal savings, and it just doesn't add up.
posted by croutonsupafreak at 10:21 PM on September 6, 2008

I'm having trouble figuring out how buying cheaper things means she is wasting her money.
posted by rhizome at 10:22 PM on September 6, 2008

I'm having trouble figuring out how buying cheaper things means she is wasting her money.

Well, it depends on how exactly she is buying things cheaper. If we're talking quality, then a lot of cheaper things don't last as long and end up being more expensive. Take shoes, for example - you can buy really cheap ones, but they'll fall apart quickly and you'll waste money replacing them all the time. And you won't even get the benefit of nice shoes for all that money you spend. If you just buy nice shoes to begin with they'll last a long time and maybe even save you money in the long run.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 10:41 PM on September 6, 2008 [1 favorite has favorites]

But then again, I think it's good to invest in higher-quality non-cheap products when necessary but not spend a lot of money on useless status-upgrade stuff. Spending money for a car with better MPG? Good. Spending money for a car that looks prettier than your friend's? Stupid.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 10:44 PM on September 6, 2008

For everyone who says 'yay buy the cheapest things', it sounds to me like the issue is about buying the best *value*, even if it costs more at the moment. So, spending a little extra money on shoes that will last five years rather than one, or buying furniture that won't break if you sit down on it too hard. Or buying food that will keep you healthy and energetic rather than 10-cent ramen.

That's a bit harder, and it seems to me that a lot of it comes from being around people who also consider that reasonable. The rest of it comes from just starting to think about long-term consequences - "I'm going to take this furniture with me when I move" vs. "I'll probably move across the country and buy new stuff rather than ship it". Some of that even doesn't come until you start to notice those consequences - the $10 backpack that fell apart within a year vs. the $30 backpack that has lasted for six years and is still sturdy, the way the screws came out on the cheap lawn furniture and it collapsed, etc. Probably the most helpful thing you can do is point it out to her in those cases.
posted by Lady Li at 10:46 PM on September 6, 2008 [2 favorites has favorites]

If she's like most people in that phase of life, she'll probably be moving around a lot. Less stuff means cheaper and quicker moves.

Why buy a bunch of "permanent" stuff if the situation is temporary?

Pay off debt, save for future, don't starve. Beyond that? Meh.
posted by Sys Rq at 11:07 PM on September 6, 2008

If I am anything to go by, she won't.

But I am still using tack from my first horse, which I bought when I was 14. Some of it was used at the time. There are a few things from high school, mostly vintage cocktail dresses, that I still wear.

But I have always been able buying well-made things and taking care of them.

And with things going the way the seem to be going, perhaps spending is not the best idea...
posted by Lesser Shrew at 11:36 PM on September 6, 2008

Less stuff means cheaper and quicker moves.

Furthermore, stuff gets damaged in moves. I think it's still a good idea to own cheap stuff if you don't think you'll be living somewhere for more than a couple of years.
posted by grouse at 1:16 AM on September 7, 2008

You can buy nice, quality, used things for cheap on Craigslist. Once you stop caring about "new", an entire magical world of fanciness opens up to you.

Don't discourage her frugality. It's a virtue.
posted by the jam at 1:52 AM on September 7, 2008

nth'ing pretty much what everyone else is saying. I made that mistake, and thanks to credit, I'm still literally paying for it today, 10+ years later. I did a good job, that got me raises, and I thought 'cool, now I can afford a bigger apartment, nice furniture, nice car, etc.' Ended-up living at the edge of my means. Anytime anything unexpected came-up, I'd need to use credit, which is an evil quicksand of doom. Should have just put the money away and kept living simply for a few years. I finally realized the err of my ways and downsized on all fronts, but the debt still lingers.
posted by hungrysquirrels at 3:46 AM on September 7, 2008 [1 favorite has favorites]

MYOB.

If her biggest financial issue is buying cheap stuff that might wind up costing a little more in the long term, she's doing better than 80% of the country right now.
posted by toomuchpete at 8:44 AM on September 7, 2008

Part of being an adult is figuring out your own style: hers might not be yours. If she's happily, gainfully employed, don't criticize! That's an awesome place to be right after university. There is a downside to the Sam Vimes Boots Theory of course, but as other MeFites have pointed out, there are upsides, too. Once upon a time people got all kinds of help feathering their nest in the form of wedding presents, but times change. Maybe the two of you could go to consignment shops or check out things from craigslist. When she finds something she likes, go halves or get it for her as a christmas / birthday present -- as long as it is something she likes, not just you. If you find something cool together, it'll become valuable down the line not because of its price, but from the memories of how you two found it. Who knows, maybe she could help you find some great bargains for yourself.
posted by woodway at 11:24 AM on September 7, 2008

As your disposable income rises, so too will your spending habits shift. Peer group changes and new needs (I'm in a new city, I have new friends, and I want to have them over to my apartment) will drive much of it.

I think it's important to attempt to be aware of your spending changes as you go through this sort of life-shift; be aware of what you value, and what you think really increases your quality of life. As disposable income rises it's really common for spending to rise disproportionately, as you go from being reluctant to spend money at all to realizing that you can, and then over-extending yourself.

If you like food, increase your food budget. If you like clothes, find a few nice things you couldn't have afforded in the past and treat yourself. I think it's important not to impulse shop (especially on big things... one of my dumbest purchases ever was a big beautiful computer desk that looks okay, but really didn't make a whole lot of practical sense) but to be more open to the possibility of making larger purchases, which can be a strange mental hurdle. I still have a lot of trouble justifying something like a $400 camera lens, even if it's no longer that much money. One neat trick is to make yourself save for things; I have a monthly budget that lets me live very comfortably, and when I want things i think are excessive, it comes from earnings above and beyond that budget, and I have to put a sum equal to what I spend into an investment vehicle. This makes sense to me because I'm not on a salary, but something similar should work for anyone.


It's important to be aware of money, and not be stupid with it, but I think it's just as important to be willing to use it as a tool to increase your quality of life. Find out what little things make you happy, and be willing to spend more on them.


Craigslist/good second-hand furniture stores are very much your friend for that kind of thing.
posted by cmyr at 11:45 AM on September 7, 2008

She'll move on when she's ready and when her peer group does. But, really, it doesn't make a lot of sense to buy things of lasting value when you're starting out. She'll probably move a few times and it doesn't make sense to make an investment in furniture under those conditions. It may not even make sense to make an investment in cutlery or dishes and the like. Also, if she ramps up her lifestyle, she may have a hard time adjusting if she goes through a job loss. It would make more sense for her to build up an emergency fund, funds for furniture/computer/decor, wardrobe and so on.

This week, I gave away two really nice dressers I bought not long after college. I also gave away a great mattress. That's because they really don't make sense for the home I'm in now. I can get more value out of my home with furnishings that fit the space better. I kind of wish I'd bought cheap furniture back then, so that I wouldn't be giving away solid wood dressers now. I'm too pressed for time to have people come look at them and so a charity will benefit.
posted by acoutu at 1:41 PM on September 7, 2008

Honestly, I'd try to maintain a frugal (if not college-student) lifestyle as long as possible. The less you jack up your spending each time your income increases, the more money you'll save, and the more freedom you'll have. The confidence and freedom that comes from having lots of money saved can outweigh the pleasure you'd get from spending the money and having a nicer lifestyle. And be careful when you choose the people you associate with -- whether they are big spenders or savers, whichever one they are, you'll tend to become like them.
posted by lsemel at 5:50 PM on September 7, 2008