My worst nightmare has become true: I've turned 30! What now?
April 9, 2008 12:51 PM   Subscribe

My worst nightmare has become true: I've turned 30! What now?

Just yesterday I was an 18-year kid old full of dreams and hope; e.g. being rich at 22, which of course didn't happen.

Now I'm a 30 y.o. fart with a good job, a cute 23 y.o. girlfriend, know 22 countries, have a decent life, some nice savings, but I'm still not satisfied. I feel there's something missing in my life, don't know whether it's personal or professional-wise.

I finished college, am going for an MBA, I'm even writing a (technical) book! I'm not interested in planting trees or having kids at this time, therefore I'll take as many suggestions to what to do with my life from now on.

Talk amongst yourselves.
posted by dcrocha to Human Relations (9 answers total)

This post was deleted for the following reason: You don't appear to have an actual question here, other than "am I awesome or what?" Askme is for solving problems, not patting yourself on the back. -- cortex

 
So lemme get this straight.....you are dating a woman 7 years younger than yourself...you have traveled to 22 foreign countries.....you have a secure job....you seem to have some ambition for the future. My advice is to stop whining and appreciate the blessed life you live. FWIW, I am turning 30 next month.
posted by gnutron at 12:56 PM on April 9, 2008


Maybe you need a girlfriend who you can describe as “interesting” rather than just “cute.”
posted by bondcliff at 1:01 PM on April 9, 2008 [12 favorites]


Flagged. Chatfilter.

And to answer the question: Learn something hard. Really hard, that will take years and years to perfect.

Croissants. Difficult. Really. Start now.
posted by rtha at 1:05 PM on April 9, 2008


As a 37 year old guy, I can tell you my 30s have been WAY BETTER than my 20s. I would never have predicted that.
posted by punkfloyd at 1:06 PM on April 9, 2008


30 is a baby. Take a free online course (like MIT open courseware or something) on a subject that you don't know much about.
posted by Burhanistan at 1:08 PM on April 9, 2008


If everyone else I know is any indication, have your 30 crisis in a few months. Go through a breakup in which you realize your previous ideal has no bearing on where you want your life to be, consider changing careers, move to a new city, stop giving a crap what people think and quit bragging about your life while bemoaning how old 30 feels on the internet.
posted by Gucky at 1:09 PM on April 9, 2008 [4 favorites]


You feel like there's something missing from your life, but you don't know what it is. Your post suggests that to the extent that you have thought of goals, you have either accomplished those goals or are working towards them. So whatever it is that is missing must lie outside of the universe of things you already know you want to do. Thus, my first piece of advice is to do something you do NOT want to do with as open a mind as possible. For example, you say you're not interested in "planting trees." Have you ever done it? Are you involved in any activities that bring you close to nature? Are you involved in any activities that help the community or the less fortunate? Perhaps you should start by finding such an activity and committing to do it for several months. Remember, not wanting to do it is not enough to indicate that this activity is definitely not going to provide you with an experience or hobby that makes the "something missing" feeling go away, so don't be deterred.

My next piece of advice is to do something that leaves you totally indifferent. I can't possibly know what this would be for you -- maybe a math class, if you don't care about math? A cooking class? Find random lists of things that you can do in your spare time, because you're not likely to think of something like this yourself. Same principle as before.

Finally, consider that the problem is not, as has been laughingly suggested, that something is actually missing. Perhaps the problem is that you feel as though something is missing, when nothing is. If you decide that this is likely to be the case, then try to examine where that feeling is coming from. Have you had to struggle until now, and suddenly don't know what to do when you're not having to overcome difficulties? Do you feel like your life doesn't conform to society's expectations? Are you bored by your job, your partner, or your use of your free time? Etc.

I hope that future posters will be a little more sensitive than the first two. The feeling that the poster describes is very common, and it does not make him a bad person or an object for ridicule.
posted by prefpara at 1:10 PM on April 9, 2008 [2 favorites]


What are you doing for anyone but yourself? Serving food or helping with the rent at a shelter? YOu are no longer a teenager, maybe it is time to look outward instead of inward.
posted by Cranberry at 1:10 PM on April 9, 2008


Learn to crochet. Meditate. Do yoga. Wear sunscreen. Be kind to young children, the elderly, and small animals. Reread your questions before clicking post. Learn some humility. Step back and take a look at yourself. Sheesh.
posted by Daddy-O at 1:11 PM on April 9, 2008


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