Seeking sensational sensation play toys
October 3, 2024 5:13 AM Subscribe
Hi green gang. My special naked friend and I are gonna do some blindfolded sensation play. Please help me treat her to a deluxe and varied sensation buffet!
We are a cishet couple. I am M52 and she is F52. I am the blindfolder. Neither of us has very much experience with kink. I proposed this after she said that she said she was excited about giving up control -- this seemed like a good place to start with that sort of thing, a very shallow end experience. She was quite receptive! It's going to be a good time, I think, we're pretty excited about it.
Here are some of the sensation toys I've been thinking of. Are there any here that you would urge caution about? Can you suggest any more? Ideally toys will work silently, without noise, unless hearing is the sense being targeted. (or maybe we could add earplugs?)
Regular household objects that can be repurposed would be awesome so I don't have to buy stuff.
fake fur mittens
wartenburg pinwheel
clothespins / nipple clamps
massage-oil candles
handheld fans for cool goosebumpy breezes.
frozen sponges in ziplock bags (like an ice cube but less messy and lasts longer)
feather duster
silk scarf or handkerchief
rubber bands, for snapping
makeup brush or other soft brush (suggestions?)
hand warmer (chemical or electrical)
hot stones (how to warm them?)
fragrant oils for scenty play (I worry about exposure to delicate bits tho. maybe infuse some cotton balls?)
balloons or other hair-raising static electricity rich surface (ideas? balloons are clumsy and noisy)
tuning fork (these can feel nice to the touch)
plain ol vibrators (not silent alas)
thank you everyone and have a sexy day!
We are a cishet couple. I am M52 and she is F52. I am the blindfolder. Neither of us has very much experience with kink. I proposed this after she said that she said she was excited about giving up control -- this seemed like a good place to start with that sort of thing, a very shallow end experience. She was quite receptive! It's going to be a good time, I think, we're pretty excited about it.
Here are some of the sensation toys I've been thinking of. Are there any here that you would urge caution about? Can you suggest any more? Ideally toys will work silently, without noise, unless hearing is the sense being targeted. (or maybe we could add earplugs?)
Regular household objects that can be repurposed would be awesome so I don't have to buy stuff.
thank you everyone and have a sexy day!
frozen sponges in ziplock bags (like an ice cube but less messy and lasts longer)
Other people's opinion may vary I guess but please don't touch me with a wet plastic bag. This is such a gross and unpleasant feeling for me that I physically cringed and stopped reading your list. Sorry.
posted by phunniemee at 5:41 AM on October 3 [11 favorites]
Other people's opinion may vary I guess but please don't touch me with a wet plastic bag. This is such a gross and unpleasant feeling for me that I physically cringed and stopped reading your list. Sorry.
posted by phunniemee at 5:41 AM on October 3 [11 favorites]
To gently warm things, place them in bowl of hot water for five to ten minutes depending on how well they conduct heat. Dry things off with a towel if you don’t want them wet, or warm them inside a bag - silicone baggies like stashers are good for things that need to stay body safe.
Please do not apply essential oils directly to the skin, even non-delicate parts. Put cotton balls or rounds into closed containers with some scents for them to absorb ahead of time, then take them out when desired and store them back in the container when you’re done. Scent can make powerful emotions happen and you want a way to quickly stop the scent if needed. If scentplay works well for you both on future occasions you can scent fabric items like cushions, scarves, ribbons, rope, etc, by popping them ahead of time into a storage container with the scent. This is basically what lavender sachets in dresser drawers do.
I would avoid clothespins. They are usually not well made and can be unexpectedly rough. Get actual clamps if that’s something you’ve discussed and she is up for trying.
Don’t forget taste. A small piece of dark chocolate melts in a very specific way when held still on the tongue which can be quite an experience. Being fed small morsels is a big exercise in trust. Try something light and crispy, like popcorn, something cold and sweet like a frozen grape, something warm and rich like buttery toasted bread with cinnamon. Little single bites. Keep cool water nearby and make sure she has some afterwards at the very least.
posted by Mizu at 5:45 AM on October 3 [2 favorites]
Please do not apply essential oils directly to the skin, even non-delicate parts. Put cotton balls or rounds into closed containers with some scents for them to absorb ahead of time, then take them out when desired and store them back in the container when you’re done. Scent can make powerful emotions happen and you want a way to quickly stop the scent if needed. If scentplay works well for you both on future occasions you can scent fabric items like cushions, scarves, ribbons, rope, etc, by popping them ahead of time into a storage container with the scent. This is basically what lavender sachets in dresser drawers do.
I would avoid clothespins. They are usually not well made and can be unexpectedly rough. Get actual clamps if that’s something you’ve discussed and she is up for trying.
Don’t forget taste. A small piece of dark chocolate melts in a very specific way when held still on the tongue which can be quite an experience. Being fed small morsels is a big exercise in trust. Try something light and crispy, like popcorn, something cold and sweet like a frozen grape, something warm and rich like buttery toasted bread with cinnamon. Little single bites. Keep cool water nearby and make sure she has some afterwards at the very least.
posted by Mizu at 5:45 AM on October 3 [2 favorites]
Instead of a frozen sponge in a plastic bag, wrap a bag of frozen peas/corn in a face towel.
Feather duster is good if you can get one, but cheaper is just feathers which you can get from a craft store.
Honey powder can be nice to brush on - external use only.
Spiked massage roller.
posted by plinth at 7:41 AM on October 3
Feather duster is good if you can get one, but cheaper is just feathers which you can get from a craft store.
Honey powder can be nice to brush on - external use only.
Spiked massage roller.
posted by plinth at 7:41 AM on October 3
The note about a spiked massage roller made me think that a cold stone face roller might work for the feeling of cold without gross wetness being involved. Like you could put a stone face roller in the fridge or freezer for a while and bring it out when it's time.
posted by limeonaire at 8:16 AM on October 3 [1 favorite]
posted by limeonaire at 8:16 AM on October 3 [1 favorite]
Also, it's possible this kind of play can get boring if it's just one unexpected "hey what does this feel like" after another. Think about the narrative of what you want to try and how to connect it to other kinds of touches. What leads naturally to trying something else? What got a better response than you thought that you might want to come back to? Is what she wants just to give up control sensorily, or is it possible she also wants to experience an element of force or similar? Part of setting the scene could also be in what your persona is or how you talk to her (e.g., more dominant), if talking is part of it, or how you move her body or position yourself. Or you might discover movements that she likes that don't involve objects whatsoever, like tickling or using feet. I guess I would caution you not to overprepare by buying or procuring a whole lot of objects y'all might or might not like when "giving up control" can also be achieved in no-cost ways.
posted by limeonaire at 8:26 AM on October 3 [9 favorites]
posted by limeonaire at 8:26 AM on October 3 [9 favorites]
I'm seconding limeonaire a bunch. A few thoughts:
What surfaces will you use for her to sit, lay, or lean on? Do you have some different options? Hard, firm, and soft? Can you have some pillows available so she can comfortably stay in different positions?
Could you keep some towels or sheets in the freezer, and keep some warm (in an oven or clothes dryer), to drape on her or to have her lie upon?
What actions can you do with your bare or gloved hand? Fingernails can scritch slowly or quickly, lightly or deeply. Ahead of time, you could exfoliate and moisturize one hand but not the other, for contrast effects.
A footrub with multiple different kinds of lotion/body butter can be neat! As you pause to switch to a different substance, she might think that you're about to move on to another action, but then you surprise her by staying with the feet. You could precede it with a warm foot soak in a little bucket with some Epsom salts.
Might she enjoy having her hair brushed? She'd probably have to sit up and take the blindfold off and keep her eyes closed, so preparing for that would be good.
If your household owns any lipstick or other makeup, you could possibly use it to write on her, which would give her the added suspense of not knowing what you've written till after the blindfold comes off.
posted by brainwane at 9:09 AM on October 3 [2 favorites]
What surfaces will you use for her to sit, lay, or lean on? Do you have some different options? Hard, firm, and soft? Can you have some pillows available so she can comfortably stay in different positions?
Could you keep some towels or sheets in the freezer, and keep some warm (in an oven or clothes dryer), to drape on her or to have her lie upon?
What actions can you do with your bare or gloved hand? Fingernails can scritch slowly or quickly, lightly or deeply. Ahead of time, you could exfoliate and moisturize one hand but not the other, for contrast effects.
A footrub with multiple different kinds of lotion/body butter can be neat! As you pause to switch to a different substance, she might think that you're about to move on to another action, but then you surprise her by staying with the feet. You could precede it with a warm foot soak in a little bucket with some Epsom salts.
Might she enjoy having her hair brushed? She'd probably have to sit up and take the blindfold off and keep her eyes closed, so preparing for that would be good.
If your household owns any lipstick or other makeup, you could possibly use it to write on her, which would give her the added suspense of not knowing what you've written till after the blindfold comes off.
posted by brainwane at 9:09 AM on October 3 [2 favorites]
I would suggest maybe not nipple clamps this time out, unless your partner has worn them before. Depending on the nipples and the clamps involved, the line into pain play may be a lot closer than you think.
Like Mizu’s suggestion for warming things, you can also chill things in a bowl of water and dry them. For me, though, part of the fun of ice cubes is the trail of water as they melt and I’d happily lie on a towel if mess was a concern. (Also, your list doesn’t have a gentle rough texture, like terrycloth, so you might add a washcloth or hand towel in to play with.)
I would generally suggest against long-lasting temperature tools or ones you have to supervise closely for safety, like candles, for your first time - if the two of you are just learning what you like and how you communicate in these scenarios, go easy on yourselves. Oil or lotion can also be warmed by immersing the bottle in hot water.
Paint brushes are generally cheaper than makeup brushes, so I’d go to the craft store and try some on your inner wrist. But for a big fluffy brush, you’d want a powder or blush brush, and drugstore brand would be fine.
As an alternative to earplugs, you could do earbuds or headphones with music or ambient sound.
posted by Hark! A Sock Puppet at 9:12 AM on October 3 [1 favorite]
Like Mizu’s suggestion for warming things, you can also chill things in a bowl of water and dry them. For me, though, part of the fun of ice cubes is the trail of water as they melt and I’d happily lie on a towel if mess was a concern. (Also, your list doesn’t have a gentle rough texture, like terrycloth, so you might add a washcloth or hand towel in to play with.)
I would generally suggest against long-lasting temperature tools or ones you have to supervise closely for safety, like candles, for your first time - if the two of you are just learning what you like and how you communicate in these scenarios, go easy on yourselves. Oil or lotion can also be warmed by immersing the bottle in hot water.
Paint brushes are generally cheaper than makeup brushes, so I’d go to the craft store and try some on your inner wrist. But for a big fluffy brush, you’d want a powder or blush brush, and drugstore brand would be fine.
As an alternative to earplugs, you could do earbuds or headphones with music or ambient sound.
posted by Hark! A Sock Puppet at 9:12 AM on October 3 [1 favorite]
To build on hair brushing, there are SO MANY interesting sensory experiences around hair and hairbrushes!
- gathering the hair for brushing? Tug a little, or pull tight at the scalp, gauge response -> exposing bare neck for other play!
- on the downstroke, let the bristles brush the skin and gauge response -> use the bristle side on other parts!
- if it's a nice wooden brush or paddle shaped, flip to the other side and let it glide over the skin, as a break from the bristle-side.
- if it's a solid brush (not a vented brush), it can be used on your own skin or hand to make marvelously thwacky sounds, gauge response -> try on your partner (gently!)
If she's excited about giving up control, but wary of real restraint, you can always put her hands where they'd be if you tied them, and tell her to keep them there, on her own.
Please have a conversation about consent, checking in, and use of red/yellow/green and/or thumbs up/down/timeout* to signal ongoing consent and feedback. Empowered kind is hot!
*In particular I like using a referee's T hands to pause, but not stop, what's happening and trigger a check-in.
posted by ApathyGirl at 1:59 PM on October 3 [4 favorites]
- gathering the hair for brushing? Tug a little, or pull tight at the scalp, gauge response -> exposing bare neck for other play!
- on the downstroke, let the bristles brush the skin and gauge response -> use the bristle side on other parts!
- if it's a nice wooden brush or paddle shaped, flip to the other side and let it glide over the skin, as a break from the bristle-side.
- if it's a solid brush (not a vented brush), it can be used on your own skin or hand to make marvelously thwacky sounds, gauge response -> try on your partner (gently!)
If she's excited about giving up control, but wary of real restraint, you can always put her hands where they'd be if you tied them, and tell her to keep them there, on her own.
Please have a conversation about consent, checking in, and use of red/yellow/green and/or thumbs up/down/timeout* to signal ongoing consent and feedback. Empowered kind is hot!
*In particular I like using a referee's T hands to pause, but not stop, what's happening and trigger a check-in.
posted by ApathyGirl at 1:59 PM on October 3 [4 favorites]
Peeled grapes
posted by DeepSeaHaggis at 2:48 PM on October 4
posted by DeepSeaHaggis at 2:48 PM on October 4
You are not logged in, either login or create an account to post comments
Go Ask Alice
posted by snuffleupagus at 5:30 AM on October 3 [2 favorites]