In the "what would you do?" category
June 30, 2024 8:33 AM Subscribe
Well, yesterday was a waste of gas and moisturizer. I got shown up at a reading by
an obnoxious audience member.
All but one person got up and left after the person preceding me finished.
That was bad enough, but about 1/3 through my reading someone ran up to the organizer (about 10-15 feet from me) and began an animated extended conversation. I'm easily distracted, but was determined to be professional and FOCUS. At some point, the organizer dragged her away and I finished. Thank G/d there's always one person listening and engaged.
Several things went through my mind -- put the microphone down, stop and stare, bring her the microphone "since you have so much to share" (Slam poet Derrick Brown once yelled "shut up" at a rude audience member at and it seemed to work) but I ended up focusing as hard as I could. Now I can't stop anyone's rudeness, but the organizer could, and did ..... eventually.
*Sigh* If they knew how hard it was to do this.
-Some would say get out of it if you can't handle it, except I believe I was made for this. I've been good, but sometimes go into deer in headlights mode.
-I believe it was on the organizer, who moved, but not soon enough.
Say you've performed, how do you handle rude and/or disruptive audience members? Or do you just accept that people are rude.
All but one person got up and left after the person preceding me finished.
That was bad enough, but about 1/3 through my reading someone ran up to the organizer (about 10-15 feet from me) and began an animated extended conversation. I'm easily distracted, but was determined to be professional and FOCUS. At some point, the organizer dragged her away and I finished. Thank G/d there's always one person listening and engaged.
Several things went through my mind -- put the microphone down, stop and stare, bring her the microphone "since you have so much to share" (Slam poet Derrick Brown once yelled "shut up" at a rude audience member at and it seemed to work) but I ended up focusing as hard as I could. Now I can't stop anyone's rudeness, but the organizer could, and did ..... eventually.
*Sigh* If they knew how hard it was to do this.
-Some would say get out of it if you can't handle it, except I believe I was made for this. I've been good, but sometimes go into deer in headlights mode.
-I believe it was on the organizer, who moved, but not soon enough.
Say you've performed, how do you handle rude and/or disruptive audience members? Or do you just accept that people are rude.
I stop speaking, and look at the person making the disruption. I breathe slowly and deeply to regulate myself. When they stop talking, I say " thank you" while maintaining eye-contact, with a neutral-to-warm tone. Then continue talking.
If the disruptive person only realized their disruption due to someone else pointing it out, I thank the helper with a slightly warmer tone.
Your experience was crummy and unfair. Do what you need to do to regulate yourself and make sure that the audience who is there gets a good read from you.
posted by Sauter Vaguely at 10:19 AM on June 30 [3 favorites]
If the disruptive person only realized their disruption due to someone else pointing it out, I thank the helper with a slightly warmer tone.
Your experience was crummy and unfair. Do what you need to do to regulate yourself and make sure that the audience who is there gets a good read from you.
posted by Sauter Vaguely at 10:19 AM on June 30 [3 favorites]
When you are a teacher or speaker, assume ownership and allow yourself some arrogance. Not really arrogance, but definitely a sense of control. Side discussion, look at them and say, politely, Could you move that discussion to the lobby, please? I've done some teaching, it took me a bit to realize the class/ audience assumed I was an expert, expected me to be in charge. Take yourself seriously; it helps others take you seriously. I believe I was made for this is a great position to have; you've got this.
posted by theora55 at 10:30 AM on June 30 [33 favorites]
posted by theora55 at 10:30 AM on June 30 [33 favorites]
Can only chime in with my own experience over 30 years in front of various audiences, usually <5>
I learned to do that RIGHT AWAY and not just keep on hoping they'll shut up, because that emboldens the rude. Pounce on it straight away. Usually when I set the example, others got the point.
Only one time in all the years did I have a blatant repeat offender. He was a senior executive with the client firm I was working for, way above my pay grade. After several interruptions I stopped, called a five minute break, beckoned the guy into the corridor, and told him if he didn't stop interrupting me, I would kick him out. I didn't have the authority to do that, but he acceded, and the rest of the session went without further incident. YMMV.
posted by charris5005 at 6:44 PM on June 30 [2 favorites]
I learned to do that RIGHT AWAY and not just keep on hoping they'll shut up, because that emboldens the rude. Pounce on it straight away. Usually when I set the example, others got the point.
Only one time in all the years did I have a blatant repeat offender. He was a senior executive with the client firm I was working for, way above my pay grade. After several interruptions I stopped, called a five minute break, beckoned the guy into the corridor, and told him if he didn't stop interrupting me, I would kick him out. I didn't have the authority to do that, but he acceded, and the rest of the session went without further incident. YMMV.
posted by charris5005 at 6:44 PM on June 30 [2 favorites]
You are not logged in, either login or create an account to post comments
There are other ways to deal with it, of course. But to me, it's the best way to deal with the problem while keeping the room neutral to positive.
posted by merriment at 9:32 AM on June 30 [6 favorites]