Help for Cat Siblings Please!

May 21, 2024 3:08 PM

My friend is at her wits' end. Read on if you know about tricky cat situations.

A little over a year ago, my friend adopted 2 kittens, Griffey and Gracie (sorry I do not have a photo for the cat tax!). They are brother and sister. They used to get along really well and play all the time, spend time together a lot, etc. Then maybe a month or so ago, my friend took Gracie to the vet b/c she thought she had swallowed a string (she was fine). Ever since they brought her back from the vet, all hell has broken loose. Griffey is super dominant and aggressive toward Gracie apparently b/c she smells different now. They can't be in the same space in the apartment. My friend often works from home, but not always, so it's hard to keep them separated without relegating them each to a small room, or one to a small room and the other to have use of the whole house. The situation is extremely, extremely stressful for my friend she is sleeping on the couch now. Any advice/suggestions? The vet suggested some things like separating them that will take time, but she's given it a lot of time. They may have tried Feliway. They are also hoping to see a behavioral specialist but haven't yet.

posted by bookworm4125 to Pets & Animals (5 answers total)

DO continue to use Feliway. The thing to accomplish here is for their individual smells to mingle. Your friend can do this by going back and forth, petting one cat, then the other, back again, back again, etc., not washing hands between. Also try using a hand towel in that process. Focus on the cheek areas. Also if they sleep on something, swap that back and forth between them. You especially want to get the Griffey's scent on Gracie. After a day or two, open the door a crack, let them check each other out. Repeat until things go better. This is pretty typical post-vet visit behavior and the problem may be that your friend has simply separated them without doing this kind of reintroduction process.
posted by beagle at 3:22 PM on May 21 [3 favorites]

In a similar situation, I smeared a favourite cat treat on one cat's head and the other licked it off and then just kept on grooming after that.
posted by Acari at 5:12 PM on May 21 [3 favorites]

Has taking Griffey to the vet been tried? Even if it's to just go sit in his carrier for a bit?
(If not, and I was dealing with what your friend is, I'd be tempted to explain and ask the vet if I could just borrow a bit of floor space for an hour, if Griffey didn't need a checkup or shots or something.)
posted by stormyteal at 7:00 PM on May 21

It can help to wash them, one after another. Just damp wash clothes to wipe them all over so they are fairly wet and then release them next to each other. They strongly dislike this experience and will seek comfort and grooming, and they’ll both smell of the same pet shampoo at that moment.
posted by dorothyisunderwood at 8:03 PM on May 21 [3 favorites]

When our sibling cats got into an ongoing turf war that we think was triggered by displaced aggression from a raccoon prowling about, it was inadvertently fixed by a vet visit. We took them to the vet in separate carriers and then they were so stressed out by the vet they smooshed themselves in a single carrier at the vet office and were fine thereafter.

When one of our cats went in for emergency abdominal surgery and came back smelling like hospital and medicine and walked all weird because of the cone and drugs, his sibling hissed at him / fled from him for over a week. What seemed to help was a) using a bit of gabapentin to calm down the hissy cat b) rubbing scent soakers all over the hospital returnee, like the towel the hissy cat was using as a nap zone. The weirdest thing I did I put the fabric cone collar on my head and rubbed it around and wore it like a hat for an hour so it would smell like me and then put it on the cat.
posted by spamandkimchi at 10:22 PM on May 21 [5 favorites]