Resources for adult children of (deceased) parent with chronic illness?
February 14, 2024 1:25 PM   Subscribe

I am looking for resources (online or support groups, books, websites, etc.) to help me work through trauma and related issues from growing up with and caring for a parent with a chronic illness.

I grew up with a parent who developed a dramatically bad case of Rheumatoid Arthritis in midlife, and I'm trying to get some perspective on the entire disease process and how it affected and continues to affect me. I was a primary caretaker (as a child and adult), had real difficulties with boundaries, suffered from compassion exhaustion, probably have PTSD, etc.
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (2 answers total) 4 users marked this as a favorite
 
Maybe orthagonal, but I'm Glad My Mom Died, by Jennette McCurdy, touches on some of this--her mother had cancer, as well as mental health issues, and McCurdy ended up being responsible for too much at a young age. WBUR story. The book includes her experiences with therapy and coming to an understanding of what happened.
posted by MonkeyToes at 2:57 PM on February 14 [3 favorites]


It's a bit academic, but Forced to Care by Evelyn Nakano Glenn is good (in the sense that also encompasses "will invoke fury") on the social side of caretaking, particularly if you were socialized female. I'd also suggest looking for resources for parentified children if you haven't been using that term.

r/CaregiverSupport on Reddit is pretty active, but can be rough going if you're not in the right headspace or hit the wrong post at the wrong time. It is emphatically not a space for care recipients, which can make for added difficulty if you're in the not uncommon situation of having been both.
posted by LadyInWaiting at 3:35 AM on February 15 [2 favorites]


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