How do you handle the background stress of a potential layoff?
January 2, 2024 1:00 PM Subscribe
I'm in the position, like I'm guessing most people in my milieu, of getting laid off early this year, let's say at least 1 in 4 chance. It's been low-level stressful since I've had this realization. How do you go about living/working/etc with this cloud over your head? bucket of text below but you can ignore and just answer the question here.
I've been extremely lucky to have worked at roughly the same place for 13 years (there was an acquisition by a large company), and for other than a month or so last spring, I have not even contemplated potentially being laid off (nor in my prior 3 years of employment-- I sat out most of the great recession in grad school). Since then I've been thinking about it more and more, my sleep has been affected, my eczema is acting up, I got some cold sores in my mouth and I think it will start affecting work performance too.
There's some wrinkles that have affected my thinking (the part I really need to tell my therapist) that have made my thinking very ambivalent, and even more stressful:
I have a several year safety net on one hand but on the other hand, our family is growing by one during mid year and anticipating some nice-unstressed paternity leave. On another hand, I have a degree of influence (at least it seems) of not being laid off (I work in consulting, I am hitting the bench, the expectation is that I hustle and network, but my skills are fairly general and my network is having same issues finding projects and already getting laid off). On another hand, I actually want to get another job, but I find it hard to be motivated to find another one (next askmefi). On one hand I've never had much adversity/had to hustle (see several year safety net, sitting out great recession). On the last hand, there are rumors that I may have some job protections due to my upcoming leave (but I don't want to ask, these things are held tightly and seem to have lots of leeway).
I've been extremely lucky to have worked at roughly the same place for 13 years (there was an acquisition by a large company), and for other than a month or so last spring, I have not even contemplated potentially being laid off (nor in my prior 3 years of employment-- I sat out most of the great recession in grad school). Since then I've been thinking about it more and more, my sleep has been affected, my eczema is acting up, I got some cold sores in my mouth and I think it will start affecting work performance too.
There's some wrinkles that have affected my thinking (the part I really need to tell my therapist) that have made my thinking very ambivalent, and even more stressful:
I have a several year safety net on one hand but on the other hand, our family is growing by one during mid year and anticipating some nice-unstressed paternity leave. On another hand, I have a degree of influence (at least it seems) of not being laid off (I work in consulting, I am hitting the bench, the expectation is that I hustle and network, but my skills are fairly general and my network is having same issues finding projects and already getting laid off). On another hand, I actually want to get another job, but I find it hard to be motivated to find another one (next askmefi). On one hand I've never had much adversity/had to hustle (see several year safety net, sitting out great recession). On the last hand, there are rumors that I may have some job protections due to my upcoming leave (but I don't want to ask, these things are held tightly and seem to have lots of leeway).
Potential layoffs are so so so stressful. My company went through huge layoffs last year and the information was leaked, so everyone knew what was coming for months before hand. It was incredibly difficult.
The best way to handle the stress for me was planning. Think about what you'll do if you get laid off, who will you call, how will you reign in spending, etc. Check out job listings, get familiar with companies you might like to work at. Figure out if you have any skill gaps and think about how you might fill them. Just having a solid plan that you can refer to when you start spiraling on getting laid off can be somewhat comforting. It fills in part of the unknown.
Personally, I really tried to avoid spending too much time figuring out what my personal chances of being laid off were. It was never helpful and usually only served to increase my stress. And at the end of the day, you probably have zero control over the outcome. It's just like an act of God; if it happens, it happens.
posted by TurnKey at 1:32 PM on January 2 [1 favorite]
The best way to handle the stress for me was planning. Think about what you'll do if you get laid off, who will you call, how will you reign in spending, etc. Check out job listings, get familiar with companies you might like to work at. Figure out if you have any skill gaps and think about how you might fill them. Just having a solid plan that you can refer to when you start spiraling on getting laid off can be somewhat comforting. It fills in part of the unknown.
Personally, I really tried to avoid spending too much time figuring out what my personal chances of being laid off were. It was never helpful and usually only served to increase my stress. And at the end of the day, you probably have zero control over the outcome. It's just like an act of God; if it happens, it happens.
posted by TurnKey at 1:32 PM on January 2 [1 favorite]
Best answer: I work for a large company doing consulting and noticed a huge drop off in sales around June/July and things kind of went downhill from there. I think companies were expecting a recession and killed Q3/Q4 spending. I noticed as things got desperate so did we: chasing things outside of our normal domain, etc. that said it’ll take sometime for H2 2023 numbers to come out and Q1 budgets to open up. Think of it this: how long did they take to train you and network yourself internally at a large company (eg people know to come to you for things) vs finding someone to replace you. At some big companies they simply won’t care after a certain point after seeing you on the bench report after report.
I feel like my life is in limbo, I found some comfort in throwing myself into sales and pitches, trying to do whatever I can to make my bosses life easier. I’m very vocal about what I accomplished. Really it turns into selling yourself internally which makes hustling/networking a lot easier if you have to hit the job market. Theres a certain belief that being on the bench means you’re not doing anything and it is way more stressful than working 10-12 hour consulting days in my opinion. Sort of like the beginning of Apocalypse Now where he needs to get back on the jungle and loses it. Plus if you’re at a good company (mine isn’t great but we’re hopefully improving), and you work on pitches they should help polish up your resume. Like literally give you a copywriter. Theyre trying to sell you too.
I also set events throughout the day marked as private. That way you can keep to a schedule don’t go overboard. I spent a lot of time polishing up internal tools, pitch decks, so when I’d do that or I set time aside for that I’d mark it even if I couldn’t bill for it. A lot of more junior people go on the bench and are quiet or play video games. That’s fine for a bit and if you just got benched I’d have a frank side conversation with your boss about taking some time in the afternoons for the first few weeks or whatever. The good thing about consulting is that people understand the ebb and flows.
posted by geoff. at 1:41 PM on January 2 [2 favorites]
I feel like my life is in limbo, I found some comfort in throwing myself into sales and pitches, trying to do whatever I can to make my bosses life easier. I’m very vocal about what I accomplished. Really it turns into selling yourself internally which makes hustling/networking a lot easier if you have to hit the job market. Theres a certain belief that being on the bench means you’re not doing anything and it is way more stressful than working 10-12 hour consulting days in my opinion. Sort of like the beginning of Apocalypse Now where he needs to get back on the jungle and loses it. Plus if you’re at a good company (mine isn’t great but we’re hopefully improving), and you work on pitches they should help polish up your resume. Like literally give you a copywriter. Theyre trying to sell you too.
I also set events throughout the day marked as private. That way you can keep to a schedule don’t go overboard. I spent a lot of time polishing up internal tools, pitch decks, so when I’d do that or I set time aside for that I’d mark it even if I couldn’t bill for it. A lot of more junior people go on the bench and are quiet or play video games. That’s fine for a bit and if you just got benched I’d have a frank side conversation with your boss about taking some time in the afternoons for the first few weeks or whatever. The good thing about consulting is that people understand the ebb and flows.
posted by geoff. at 1:41 PM on January 2 [2 favorites]
(For those not in consulting being on the bench is a special place in hell. You’re kind of expected to jump on calls at a given notice and at the same time have nothing to do. It is sort of like freelancing without the reward and also without knowing if/when you’ll get assigned to anything. I can only compare it to friends or my dad when layoffs were going on when I was a kid. He still got up, went to work everyday. Sales might’ve been down but he still had something to do everyday. In billable companies, especially large agencies you need to beg borrow or steal hours to make it look like you’re somewhat utilized.)
posted by geoff. at 1:47 PM on January 2
posted by geoff. at 1:47 PM on January 2
I recommend really starting to manage your stress actively - work out, plan in leisure like a walk at lunch or something fun on weekends, and connect with friends and family as much as you can (if you have other little ones, play with them at a park or other active fun-ish things.) Enjoy time with your partner (congratulations!) Do the things that remind you who you are outside of your work.
posted by warriorqueen at 1:55 PM on January 2 [1 favorite]
posted by warriorqueen at 1:55 PM on January 2 [1 favorite]
So I am a mostly "glass half empty" person. Assume you will be getting laid off. Start finding your next job now. Plan for the worst case, and then if it isn't, YAY!
That being said, I hadn't figured out what was going to happen, when I figured out that was I going to be laid off. Then Dues Ex Machina, so I didn't really have to. Good luck. You've got this.
posted by Windopaene at 2:53 PM on January 2 [1 favorite]
That being said, I hadn't figured out what was going to happen, when I figured out that was I going to be laid off. Then Dues Ex Machina, so I didn't really have to. Good luck. You've got this.
posted by Windopaene at 2:53 PM on January 2 [1 favorite]
You make plans, that's all you can do. Configure your exit routes and how to use them NOW before you need them.
You have outlined basically three likely paths here: you get laid off, you get another job, or you maybe get spared from layoffs for now. Make a plan for what you're going to do for 1 or 3, and you go ahead and start the prep work for 2 now so that when you decide to start looking at least lightly passively you have your resume shiny and your references lined up and have taken care of any low-hanging accomplishments you can tack on (training, certs, etc) before it's showtime.
You should be contemplating being laid off all the time. You should always know what your plans A, B, and probably C are at any given moment. To me, also a billable consultant for 20 years, this isn't a particularly stressful set of circumstances at any one moment because it's ALWAYS a possibility, and you were just living deep in the comfort zone.
Once you start your lightly passive job search, you may find you don't actually have to discover all that much motivation, that the prospect of greener pastures (probably with something new and interesting to do, and probably for more money) will draw you into it. You should probably get that going before all your coworkers hit the market in the layoff.
posted by Lyn Never at 3:06 PM on January 2 [2 favorites]
You have outlined basically three likely paths here: you get laid off, you get another job, or you maybe get spared from layoffs for now. Make a plan for what you're going to do for 1 or 3, and you go ahead and start the prep work for 2 now so that when you decide to start looking at least lightly passively you have your resume shiny and your references lined up and have taken care of any low-hanging accomplishments you can tack on (training, certs, etc) before it's showtime.
You should be contemplating being laid off all the time. You should always know what your plans A, B, and probably C are at any given moment. To me, also a billable consultant for 20 years, this isn't a particularly stressful set of circumstances at any one moment because it's ALWAYS a possibility, and you were just living deep in the comfort zone.
Once you start your lightly passive job search, you may find you don't actually have to discover all that much motivation, that the prospect of greener pastures (probably with something new and interesting to do, and probably for more money) will draw you into it. You should probably get that going before all your coworkers hit the market in the layoff.
posted by Lyn Never at 3:06 PM on January 2 [2 favorites]
my sleep has been affected, my eczema is acting up, I got some cold sores in my mouth and I think it will start affecting work performance too
Agreed with the poster above that these are not low-level stress responses, but actually your body responding in a very visceral and uncomfortably tangible way. I recommend the book Burnout, that talks through why our bodies respond to stress the way it does (including the brain) and what can be done to help alleviate that stress.
...there are rumors that I may have some job protections due to my upcoming leave (but I don't want to ask, these things are held tightly and seem to have lots of leeway)
I don't know what state you're in, but the protections afforded by family leave is NOT something to ask your company about, because they may give you an answer that is couched in a very specific way to make you think you're absolutely fine, which you very well may not be. Also, never show them your cards. Instead, look into your state's labor laws as well as any federal laws that might come into play. As sad as it is, your company does not have your best interests in mind and will have no qualms acting accordingly. I'm not saying this to create more stress, but rather to nudge you a bit out of what might be your comfortable 13-year lull in terms of job safety. And to give you the sense of a bit more control in your hands. Knowing your state's labor laws and job protection rules is *vital* when it comes to times of possible layoffs.
I again agree with the poster above regarding how it feels getting laid off. Well...it sucks. But you will get through it, especially with a sizable safety net. I got laid off several years ago, and at the time was among the absolute worst things I could imagine happening to me personally. But after it did happen (alongside about 80 of my colleagues), it was like...wow, ok, the terrible thing I was scared of happeing, actually happened. Now I'm on the other side. And I re-assessed, took stock of the situation, and moved forward. And was told by a very wise acquaintance (who had a super cool and successful career full of twists and turns) that hey, it happens to almost everyone if you're in the workforce long enough.
Lastly, if I were you, I would do the following:
- Update your LinkedIn account (or start one if you haven't needed one til now) and brush way up on your resumé. If it's been 13 years, you may want to look into fresher ways to portray yourself in both. You don't want either one looking too dated.
- Have a trusted colleague or two look at both of the above for helpful criticism/suggestions.
- Start a list of former colleagues, current colleagues, friends etc that you can reach out to in case you lose your job. Your community and your network can be key – and sometimes help comes from the most unexpected sources.
- Start applying for stuff, if only to see what interest is out there, and to get practice interviewing. It's a skill for sure.
posted by Molasses808 at 3:22 PM on January 2 [2 favorites]
Agreed with the poster above that these are not low-level stress responses, but actually your body responding in a very visceral and uncomfortably tangible way. I recommend the book Burnout, that talks through why our bodies respond to stress the way it does (including the brain) and what can be done to help alleviate that stress.
...there are rumors that I may have some job protections due to my upcoming leave (but I don't want to ask, these things are held tightly and seem to have lots of leeway)
I don't know what state you're in, but the protections afforded by family leave is NOT something to ask your company about, because they may give you an answer that is couched in a very specific way to make you think you're absolutely fine, which you very well may not be. Also, never show them your cards. Instead, look into your state's labor laws as well as any federal laws that might come into play. As sad as it is, your company does not have your best interests in mind and will have no qualms acting accordingly. I'm not saying this to create more stress, but rather to nudge you a bit out of what might be your comfortable 13-year lull in terms of job safety. And to give you the sense of a bit more control in your hands. Knowing your state's labor laws and job protection rules is *vital* when it comes to times of possible layoffs.
I again agree with the poster above regarding how it feels getting laid off. Well...it sucks. But you will get through it, especially with a sizable safety net. I got laid off several years ago, and at the time was among the absolute worst things I could imagine happening to me personally. But after it did happen (alongside about 80 of my colleagues), it was like...wow, ok, the terrible thing I was scared of happeing, actually happened. Now I'm on the other side. And I re-assessed, took stock of the situation, and moved forward. And was told by a very wise acquaintance (who had a super cool and successful career full of twists and turns) that hey, it happens to almost everyone if you're in the workforce long enough.
Lastly, if I were you, I would do the following:
- Update your LinkedIn account (or start one if you haven't needed one til now) and brush way up on your resumé. If it's been 13 years, you may want to look into fresher ways to portray yourself in both. You don't want either one looking too dated.
- Have a trusted colleague or two look at both of the above for helpful criticism/suggestions.
- Start a list of former colleagues, current colleagues, friends etc that you can reach out to in case you lose your job. Your community and your network can be key – and sometimes help comes from the most unexpected sources.
- Start applying for stuff, if only to see what interest is out there, and to get practice interviewing. It's a skill for sure.
posted by Molasses808 at 3:22 PM on January 2 [2 favorites]
I've been in a similar situation to you (coming from academia, used to absolute job security, then job-hunting during a turbulent time for my industry). What really helped for me was talking to friends about the anxieties (which they often had as well), and co-working with them, particularly with friends who were going through similar things and working on similar things as me.
posted by Rich Text at 7:09 PM on January 2
posted by Rich Text at 7:09 PM on January 2
Find every record of training, every good review, award, etc., and take them home. Make copies for the work files. Work you really want to keep (and can legally keep), make copies. Copy useful contacts to your personal contacts list. Connect with old friends in your industry. Revive activity in professional organizations. Imagine that you are being laid off right now; what would you want to have remembered to document? Awards and attaboy emails are cheering when being laid off gets you down.
Ask people if they'll be a reference for you, just in case. or at least have that in mind.
People are now treated as a commodity. Maybe your project will get axed because it isn't as high a priority as another project; that's pure luck, no reflection on you. Maybe your manager's manager is terrible and didn't adequately protect your group. Maybe your manager doesn't get your style, maybe all sorts of stuff. But when big companies lay off big numbers of people, competence isn't really assessed in detail. Layoff ≠ fired for cause.
I got laid off. Company was doing layoffs every quarter, management was good at spending in good times, not good at actual managing. I was called in to meet with my manager, made it easy on him, it wasn't his fault. Got a bit of a package. Ask that any last payments be expedited; in Maine, you can't collect unemployment in a week you get a meaningful paycheck, including payout of vacation time. Companies can be shockingly bad at stuff like this. I was re-employed faster than I expected. Because I saw it coming, I had backed up data I wanted. Our former manager, also being laid off, gave us laptops that would have been discarded, nice.
Take care of yourself and team members. It's unpleasant and stressful and a part of modern life, and you'll be fine.
posted by theora55 at 7:17 PM on January 2
Ask people if they'll be a reference for you, just in case. or at least have that in mind.
People are now treated as a commodity. Maybe your project will get axed because it isn't as high a priority as another project; that's pure luck, no reflection on you. Maybe your manager's manager is terrible and didn't adequately protect your group. Maybe your manager doesn't get your style, maybe all sorts of stuff. But when big companies lay off big numbers of people, competence isn't really assessed in detail. Layoff ≠ fired for cause.
I got laid off. Company was doing layoffs every quarter, management was good at spending in good times, not good at actual managing. I was called in to meet with my manager, made it easy on him, it wasn't his fault. Got a bit of a package. Ask that any last payments be expedited; in Maine, you can't collect unemployment in a week you get a meaningful paycheck, including payout of vacation time. Companies can be shockingly bad at stuff like this. I was re-employed faster than I expected. Because I saw it coming, I had backed up data I wanted. Our former manager, also being laid off, gave us laptops that would have been discarded, nice.
Take care of yourself and team members. It's unpleasant and stressful and a part of modern life, and you'll be fine.
posted by theora55 at 7:17 PM on January 2
« Older Recently verified heated outdoor gathering spots... | First time freelancer and health insurance Newer »
You are not logged in, either login or create an account to post comments
What happens is that eventually you do get laid off and you find that the world does not end. It's the attempt to predict the future that drives you nuts. Once you're actually unemployed, the path gets pretty simple: find a new thing. After that, you have the inner security that The Bad Thing happened and you didn't die, so you're not on perpetual high alert about What If Bad Thing.
I work in an industry that has pretty constant churn, both voluntary and involuntary, so for my entire career the possibility of being out of work at any given time has always been floating there. I'll be honest, it never stops being low-level stressful. There's just a level of energy I always need to be giving to things like, "how are my savings, is this long-term commitment sustainable, do I have my resume and such up to date?" But at this point I've been through enough bad shit to know that whatever the next Bad Thing is, I'll muddle through it somehow.
Of course until then, you're spiraling out on trying to perfectly predict the future. So, how to stop that? If you're as well situated as you say, is it possible to train your brain to respond to the anxious thoughts with a quick mantra like "but I'm prepared for that" or "we'll cross that bridge when we get there"?
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese at 1:29 PM on January 2 [10 favorites]