Family gathering with language challenges!
April 29, 2023 8:35 PM Subscribe
Going to go to a small family gathering, celebrating an elderly parent. Trouble is two of the attendees don't do English well, and some of the others don't do the mother language well at all. We all plan to sit at one table, the eight of us. How best to encourage communication, connectedness and warmth in this setup?
We all get along together there are no political or other tricky issues to stick handle. There are different age groups as well - teenagers, middle-aged folks and seniors.
We all get along together there are no political or other tricky issues to stick handle. There are different age groups as well - teenagers, middle-aged folks and seniors.
Place the the two non-English speakers between the best bilingual speakers, with the English only members on the other sides of the bilingual members.
posted by hworth at 10:55 PM on April 29, 2023 [5 favorites]
posted by hworth at 10:55 PM on April 29, 2023 [5 favorites]
I am in this situation often- what's helpful is having people willing to translate anything key, or any jokes that have gotten a big laugh, and who are happy to speak to me in the languages we share.
posted by Braeburn at 12:10 AM on April 30, 2023 [1 favorite]
posted by Braeburn at 12:10 AM on April 30, 2023 [1 favorite]
Small whiteboards and markers & erasers - writing / pictures can be easier. Also works if the environment is loud and people can't hear.
posted by inexorably_forward at 12:58 AM on April 30, 2023
posted by inexorably_forward at 12:58 AM on April 30, 2023
what's helpful is having people willing to translate anything key, or any jokes that have gotten a big laugh, and who are happy to speak to me in the languages we share.
Yeah, basically everyone consciously doing their best to help everyone feel included. So for example English-speaker tells story directly to non-English speaker, making eye contact with non-English speaker, knowing they can count on both-language speaker to translate. Eye contact helps a lot with making things feel inclusive, ime.
If some of the younger attendees maybe aren't so practiced at being an active guest/host, or if they don't know the people whose language they don't speak all that well, I'd do some prep work with them beforehand, telling stories about their relatives, talking with them about the language barrier, thinking with them about how it might feel from the elderly members' side, and (if they're open to it) maybe teaching them some short key phrases in the other language. If they haven't spent much time at all in contexts where people are speaking languages they don't understand and are open to it, I'd try to teach them how to actively listen and look for words they can figure out, or see how much they can understand without understanding.
Can you do some form of slideshow on elderly parent's life?
That's a nice idea, and if the teens are open to it then pictures of their recent activities might also be nice for the elders and help the teens feel included.
posted by trig at 3:08 AM on April 30, 2023 [2 favorites]
Yeah, basically everyone consciously doing their best to help everyone feel included. So for example English-speaker tells story directly to non-English speaker, making eye contact with non-English speaker, knowing they can count on both-language speaker to translate. Eye contact helps a lot with making things feel inclusive, ime.
If some of the younger attendees maybe aren't so practiced at being an active guest/host, or if they don't know the people whose language they don't speak all that well, I'd do some prep work with them beforehand, telling stories about their relatives, talking with them about the language barrier, thinking with them about how it might feel from the elderly members' side, and (if they're open to it) maybe teaching them some short key phrases in the other language. If they haven't spent much time at all in contexts where people are speaking languages they don't understand and are open to it, I'd try to teach them how to actively listen and look for words they can figure out, or see how much they can understand without understanding.
Can you do some form of slideshow on elderly parent's life?
That's a nice idea, and if the teens are open to it then pictures of their recent activities might also be nice for the elders and help the teens feel included.
posted by trig at 3:08 AM on April 30, 2023 [2 favorites]
Bring a pad of blank paper and some pens so people can draw illustrations for each other. Then you'll also have the drawings as a souvenir of the gathering.
posted by Pallas Athena at 5:44 AM on April 30, 2023
posted by Pallas Athena at 5:44 AM on April 30, 2023
My ex's parents didn't speak any English. I bought them a pack of Jenga and it was a huge hit. Yelling and laughing at tiny wooden blocks transcends language! Bring a tablecloth, too, or put some fabric like tea towels or a scarf on the table around the tower- helps the blocks not be so loud when they fall.
posted by nouvelle-personne at 5:45 AM on April 30, 2023 [1 favorite]
posted by nouvelle-personne at 5:45 AM on April 30, 2023 [1 favorite]
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posted by praemunire at 10:49 PM on April 29, 2023 [1 favorite]