Is there any consensus about tipping on bottles of wine?

February 23, 2023 7:50 AM

My two brothers and I are going on an epic steakhouse outing to Ruth’s Chris, where the Cabernets run from about $140-$250 a bottle. A sommelier rather than a waiter will be uncorking and serving 2 or 3 bottles to us, and I’ll be footing the bill. My standard tip is 20%, rounded up, and I was wondering if I should apply that same percentage to the wine, or is it ok not to?
posted by BadgerDoctor to Food & Drink (19 answers total)

One opinion, from the Washington Post food critic (from 2011): "I tip as I normally do, which is a little more than 20 percent on the pre-tax total. It gets trickier ... the more you shell out for a bottle. On a $100 bottle of wine, I'd stay with a tip of 20 percent, given the thought and the extra service that typically accompanies such purchases. (Think cellaring, decanting, upgraded stemware, etc.) But if I were to buy a second bottle at roughly the same price, I'm not sure I would continue to tip the same amount. I would certainly factor in a gratuity, but probably not as much a 20 percent. The tipping would depend, in part, on how much effort I think the staff is expending on my behalf (and whether I shared a taste of the wine in question)."
posted by Mr.Know-it-some at 7:56 AM on February 23, 2023

I tip 20%, every time, full stop. If I can afford a $250 bottle of wine, I can afford a $50 tip. If that breaks my budget, I'll order a cheaper bottle of wine.
posted by dorothy hawk at 8:06 AM on February 23, 2023 [25 favorites]

That meal is going to run you probably $1000-$1500, so a 20% tip will be $200-$300. If you wanted to give a lower tip on your wine, let's say 10%, you'd be lowering the overall tip by somewhere between $28 and $75 depending on price of bottle and how many you get.

Is it worth it to save $75 on a $1500 meal? My dude, you're already buying a $1500 meal. Just tip the full 20%.
posted by Special Agent Dale Cooper at 8:08 AM on February 23, 2023 [24 favorites]

It would never occur to me to tip separately for different aspects of the same meal.
posted by AndrewInDC at 8:22 AM on February 23, 2023 [12 favorites]

The one thing that will inevitably follow you through life is a rep for being a bad tipper. People are still saying this about Michael Jordan thirty years later, and imo this is more than fair. And, yes, they will say this about you if you just try to save $75 on a $1500 meal. Especially in that case.
posted by ivanthenotsoterrible at 9:09 AM on February 23, 2023 [2 favorites]

Pre-pandemic, you might have been able to get away with differential tipping, but now, you tip 20%+ on your tab, full stop.
posted by yellowcandy at 9:16 AM on February 23, 2023

I would tip on the full bill, not separating out the wine separately, and choose a less expensive wine accordingly if tipping on a more expensive one would be a hardship.
posted by Stacey at 9:27 AM on February 23, 2023 [3 favorites]

Why not source your own wine and pay the corkage fee?
posted by dum spiro spero at 12:30 PM on February 23, 2023 [1 favorite]

If you can afford the item, you can afford the 20% or however much you normally tip.

Would you adjust your tip% if you got wagyu instead of Salisbury steak? The server is doing the same work.

Yes, the american tipping system is completely nuts. But varying from the accepted custom will get you labeled a cheapskate. There are (a very few) tip free restaurants you can patronize if you dont like the current system.

Another thing to take under consideration is your personal tipping policy on inexpensive items. To be a complete hypocrite about everything i've just said above, i will scale my tips way up for inexpensive things. $2 beer? If i'm paying cash at a dive bar they are getting more than $2.40. $3 or $4 instead.

Of course its a contentious topic in a group. I've had to slip my server an extra tip to make up for a cheap group before.
posted by TheAdamist at 12:49 PM on February 23, 2023

I'm not going to weigh in with my personal views - but I do want to say that this is genuinely a disputed question, in the broader world, and the unanimity you are getting here is not representative. There definitely are many people who believe it is totally fine and normal not to tip on, or to tip a smaller percentage on, expensive bottled wine.
posted by kickingtheground at 1:01 PM on February 23, 2023 [12 favorites]

If you want to be the kind of person who buys expensive wine in restaurants, be the kind of person who tips well. To be performatively affluent and cheap is...not a good look.
posted by praemunire at 5:07 PM on February 23, 2023 [1 favorite]

I’ve worked in a couple fine dining places and have never heard of tipping any less on wine. It’s part of your meal. If the tip would be too much, order a cheaper wine or some other drink. This is not a place to skimp - if anything, since you’re getting a somm and not just a waiter, most would tip more
posted by Miko at 5:50 PM on February 23, 2023

I’ll also disagree with the above commenter who says this isn’t a settled matter. To the extent that’s true, it’s because almost everyone will tip on the full bill, and staff will expect a minimum of 15-20%, but some people think they shouldn’t have to, and of course staff have to live with what they get. That’s not a reason to skimp.
posted by Miko at 6:06 PM on February 23, 2023 [1 favorite]

Would you adjust your tip% if you got wagyu instead of Salisbury steak?

I absolutely tip less when I order more expensive dishes. I tend to think of it as tipping more when I order less expensive things, but it's mathematically the same. That generally means more than 20 percent when I don't order any drinks, and 30+ percent if I'm in a diner/dive kind of place.

I sometimes go to expensive restaurants but never order expensive bottles of wine. I don't know what the waiter or sommelier would expect, but again just pointing out the math: A 15% tip on a $500 bill is more than a 20% tip on a $250 bill. Yes, serving that expensive bottle of wine is additional work, but not that much extra. In other words: Thank you, BadgerDoctor. Whatever you tip, you're still subsidizing my (low or no alcohol) fine dining experiences.
posted by Mr.Know-it-some at 7:09 PM on February 23, 2023 [3 favorites]

You don’t tip on the work, you tip on the cost of the product. That’s calculated over time to produce a certain income level for the tipped staff, and unsettling pulls down the average.
posted by Miko at 7:32 PM on February 23, 2023

You plan to pay the waitstaff $250 instead of $300/$350 for what is at most one hour of actual service they're providing to you plus ~two hours tops of being on call. That is *not* an exploitative wage, lol. A lot of people confuse social pressure for ironclad rules, or liberal guilt for morality, but you don't have to suffer the same confusion. Tip amounts are discretionary. You're fine.

And I don't think you have to worry about a loss of reputation unless you really are Michael Jordan. Your tip isn't some kind of atrocity that's genuinely worthy of public outrage (though this fact won't protect you if you're famous enough to be tweet-shamed, alas). Practically speaking I bet your face isn't memorable enough for someone to remember to spit in your steak when you return two years later or whatever.
posted by MiraK at 12:45 PM on February 28, 2023 [1 favorite]

That is *not* an exploitative wage, lol.

Isn’t this field dependent? If you went into corporate law where the norm
Is a billable hour at $450, and somebody decided to try paying you only $350, you’ve been exploited because you provided service, skill, talent and reputation at the higher level. The fact that tips are left to the discretion of payers doesn’t mean there aren’t norms. People who work in the places have built their expectations on a certain average, and screwing with it fucks with their household budget. They have costs for their work (uniform cleaning, tipping out, student debt for their training, maybe a long commute and other things they’ve committed to In anticipation of their good pay at a high end place) and they can’t short on those.

A tip isn’t gravy. It’s a person’s wages.
posted by Miko at 8:19 PM on March 1, 2023 [1 favorite]

If the wait staff have provided their billable hourly rate to you in advance, OP, you should definitely pay that amount or else not use their services. Otherwise you're good. If the wait staff are making their household budgets contingent upon you ordering the expensive wine and tipping 20% on it, not leaving room for the possibility that you might bring a personal bottle for example, that's entirely on them.
posted by MiraK at 5:17 AM on March 2, 2023 [1 favorite]

Waitstaff make their personal budgets on an average take. When you behave in a way different from the norm, you impact the average.

A corkage fee makes up about 50% of the absence of the percentage tip on a $300 bottle of wine, mitigating any hit to the average (that's why it's charged).
posted by Miko at 8:44 AM on March 2, 2023