Bed Me
October 11, 2022 1:19 PM Subscribe
I'm moving to a new home in a few months, and a relative has very generously offered to buy me a new bed as a housewarming gift! How do I choose a frame and mattress that will last me for, hopefully, many years to come?
This is a big milestone for me (just turned 30 and bought my own place) and a meaningful gift from my relative. For the longest time I've been sleeping on various IKEA Malms with second-hand mattresses and they've been Okay, I Guess - I'd like to choose carefully and find something that really works that I'll be able to keep with me for a long time.
Frames:
I like wood frames/headboards with simple, clean lines. Does solid wood matter for a bed frame? I like the idea of solid wood, but even at the 2-3k price range many of the mass-produced frames from Crate & Barrel, Article, etc are veneered MDF. (Going custom with a local builder would be at least double that price; I'm not sure I'd be comfortable asking that of my relative unless I was absolutely sure I wanted it). I could see myself eventually refinishing a solid wood table, for instance, but a bed frame I'm not as sure.
Mattresses:
How do I figure out what kind of mattress I like? My mattress strategy up until now has been "whatever's free/cheap, on the firmer side please", and I don't think I've ever had strong opinions about any mattress (or futon, or pull-out bed, or couch) I've slept on. Is it actually possible to figure out your mattress preferences by lying on a bunch at the mattress store, or will this be a trial-and-error process extending over a longer period of time?
This is a big milestone for me (just turned 30 and bought my own place) and a meaningful gift from my relative. For the longest time I've been sleeping on various IKEA Malms with second-hand mattresses and they've been Okay, I Guess - I'd like to choose carefully and find something that really works that I'll be able to keep with me for a long time.
Frames:
I like wood frames/headboards with simple, clean lines. Does solid wood matter for a bed frame? I like the idea of solid wood, but even at the 2-3k price range many of the mass-produced frames from Crate & Barrel, Article, etc are veneered MDF. (Going custom with a local builder would be at least double that price; I'm not sure I'd be comfortable asking that of my relative unless I was absolutely sure I wanted it). I could see myself eventually refinishing a solid wood table, for instance, but a bed frame I'm not as sure.
Mattresses:
How do I figure out what kind of mattress I like? My mattress strategy up until now has been "whatever's free/cheap, on the firmer side please", and I don't think I've ever had strong opinions about any mattress (or futon, or pull-out bed, or couch) I've slept on. Is it actually possible to figure out your mattress preferences by lying on a bunch at the mattress store, or will this be a trial-and-error process extending over a longer period of time?
I was skeptical of direct to consumer furniture brands (since you can't try things out in person), but the Floyd bed frame (https://floydhome.com/products/the-bed-frame) is really much nicer than I expected.
Mattresses are impossible to decide on without trial and error. I got one from sleeponlatex.com and decided I wanted a firmer one, and they came and took the other one away. It was pretty easy although I had two mattresses in my apartment for a few days while I waited for someone to show up and take the old mattress away. No idea what they do with that mattress, but I think the latex is recyclable.
posted by dis_integration at 2:05 PM on October 11, 2022
Mattresses are impossible to decide on without trial and error. I got one from sleeponlatex.com and decided I wanted a firmer one, and they came and took the other one away. It was pretty easy although I had two mattresses in my apartment for a few days while I waited for someone to show up and take the old mattress away. No idea what they do with that mattress, but I think the latex is recyclable.
posted by dis_integration at 2:05 PM on October 11, 2022
I agree that trial and error is the only way I have successfully chosen a mattress. We tried a Tuft and Needle for a while and it wasn't for us, but the "return" policy was to give it to a local charity and they refunded us upon seeing a copy of the donation receipt. Felt less wasteful than a lot of other product returns...
posted by primethyme at 2:31 PM on October 11, 2022
posted by primethyme at 2:31 PM on October 11, 2022
I have a glorious platform bed with drawers. It is giant (California King) with 6 drawers on each side. It is fancy bed made artisanally out of real eco-friendly wood, that I got from a friend for free -- I am sure it cost thousands of dollars originally. Having said that, I love that type of bed. My son has a twin size version from Gothic Cabinet Craft -- not sure if you are anywhere near NYC, but if you are in the tri-state area, worth checking out.
In terms of mattresses, I remembered a particularly comfortable AirBnB experience, emailed the host, and asked what that mattress was, and bought the same one. I already knew that I don't like foam mattresses, and that I like mine on the firm side. If you have literally no preferences, you will probably have to do some trial and error -- or maybe you would be happy with any mattress!
posted by virve at 2:39 PM on October 11, 2022 [1 favorite]
In terms of mattresses, I remembered a particularly comfortable AirBnB experience, emailed the host, and asked what that mattress was, and bought the same one. I already knew that I don't like foam mattresses, and that I like mine on the firm side. If you have literally no preferences, you will probably have to do some trial and error -- or maybe you would be happy with any mattress!
posted by virve at 2:39 PM on October 11, 2022 [1 favorite]
My dad likes his Thuma a lot, and he’s a woodworking nerd. I have an upholstered Article one that’s pretty good. The Floyd’s fastener-free assembly didn’t appeal to me at all.
I’m liking the Leesa hybrid more than the plain Leesa I had before, and I liked that one too. If you’re in or near a largeish town or bigger a lot of the mattress-in-a-box companies will have spots you can try them out. I think Leesa mattresses are at Crate and Barrel or West Elm or something.
posted by supercres at 2:44 PM on October 11, 2022
I’m liking the Leesa hybrid more than the plain Leesa I had before, and I liked that one too. If you’re in or near a largeish town or bigger a lot of the mattress-in-a-box companies will have spots you can try them out. I think Leesa mattresses are at Crate and Barrel or West Elm or something.
posted by supercres at 2:44 PM on October 11, 2022
I was once in this situation, and I ended up getting a bedframe from Room & Board. The frame was fairly affordable compared to others I saw and since it's all steel construction, including the slats, it's still solid and squeak-free fifteen years down the line. (It disassembles to move but it's still pretty heavy, so if you move a lot, take that into account.)
In some major cities, Casper has brick-and-mortar stores where you can make an appointment to take a nap. We did that to figure out what firmness level we liked, and ended up buying the Casper model that Costco carried.
posted by fifthpocket at 2:49 PM on October 11, 2022
In some major cities, Casper has brick-and-mortar stores where you can make an appointment to take a nap. We did that to figure out what firmness level we liked, and ended up buying the Casper model that Costco carried.
posted by fifthpocket at 2:49 PM on October 11, 2022
If you love the idea of solid wood and don't mind finishing it, you might like KDFrames. You'd only have to finish the outside parts, not the slats. My partner has one and it's pretty dang solid and ADDITIONALLY you can get these add on legs that boost up the height enough to fit storage bins underneath.
posted by foxfirefey at 2:51 PM on October 11, 2022
posted by foxfirefey at 2:51 PM on October 11, 2022
Response by poster: Oops, forgot to mention - I am located in Canada, and many US direct-to-consumer web companies don't ship large items like bed frames up here 🙃 Something to consider when recommending specific products, though I appreciate general insights as well! (or maybe recommendations for an inexpensive freight forwarder.. I do like that Thuma bed frame)
posted by btfreek at 3:08 PM on October 11, 2022
posted by btfreek at 3:08 PM on October 11, 2022
Six years ago I bought a custom solid walnut bedframe from a small seller in Tennessee. (Etsy shop. Website.) It is superb. An heirloom. I cannot recommend it more highly.
posted by minervous at 3:49 PM on October 11, 2022
posted by minervous at 3:49 PM on October 11, 2022
Whatever you do, don't get a mattress that can ruin your house. Lots of foam mattresses use fiberglass as a flame retardant...if you take off the cover, or if the cover fails, it will explode fiberglass particles all over your home.
I had no idea about this until I asked how a coworker's recent move went, and she was like oh it was fine until the MATTRESS EXPLODED. Seriously you can Google news stories about this, it's nuts. Anyway, if you get a foam mattress, check the specs carefully and hard pass on anything with fiberglass.
Personally, I like an extra firm mattress, which is something I found out gradually but probably could have made a reasonable guess at if I had paid much attention to it. Is your current mattress real soft and squashy, or do you have a very squashy couch? Spend a night on that and take note of how your body feels, particularly your back. Then, spend a night sleeping on the floor. (Obviously move your pillows and bed clothes down, the point is to sleep on a very firm surface, not to shiver on the hardwood.) Me? My back feels so much better sleeping on the floor than the couch. Extra firm mattress is just best for my back. YMMV, but that's one way to at least note a preference at an extreme.
posted by phunniemee at 3:54 PM on October 11, 2022
I had no idea about this until I asked how a coworker's recent move went, and she was like oh it was fine until the MATTRESS EXPLODED. Seriously you can Google news stories about this, it's nuts. Anyway, if you get a foam mattress, check the specs carefully and hard pass on anything with fiberglass.
Personally, I like an extra firm mattress, which is something I found out gradually but probably could have made a reasonable guess at if I had paid much attention to it. Is your current mattress real soft and squashy, or do you have a very squashy couch? Spend a night on that and take note of how your body feels, particularly your back. Then, spend a night sleeping on the floor. (Obviously move your pillows and bed clothes down, the point is to sleep on a very firm surface, not to shiver on the hardwood.) Me? My back feels so much better sleeping on the floor than the couch. Extra firm mattress is just best for my back. YMMV, but that's one way to at least note a preference at an extreme.
posted by phunniemee at 3:54 PM on October 11, 2022
If your space is small I LOVE having the ikea Malm bed that lifts up for storage underneath, as big as possible, with a fancy mattress. I guess it’s not as fancy as some bed frames, but it means I have way less visible clutter and somewhere to hide out of season clothing so my closet has more space. It makes my whole room seem much more zen and pleasant.
posted by nouvelle-personne at 3:54 PM on October 11, 2022
posted by nouvelle-personne at 3:54 PM on October 11, 2022
I was suspicious of organic latex mattresses until I tried one. It's fabulous. Don't dismiss something just because it's unfamiliar. Try a bunch of mattresses!
posted by cleverevans at 4:01 PM on October 11, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by cleverevans at 4:01 PM on October 11, 2022 [1 favorite]
recommendations for an inexpensive freight forwarder.. I do like that Thuma bed frame
(Feel free to Memail me if you'd like any free help with this, if the location in your profile is correct, and you have the means/will to transport it back over the border.)
posted by supercres at 4:34 PM on October 11, 2022 [3 favorites]
(Feel free to Memail me if you'd like any free help with this, if the location in your profile is correct, and you have the means/will to transport it back over the border.)
posted by supercres at 4:34 PM on October 11, 2022 [3 favorites]
I recommend you start by figuring out what kind of bed base you want and then select a mattress to complement it.
The options you have are:
Sprung divan - the most expensive option, comfortable but not always the most attractive looking. Many upmarket divans have two separate sides so you can choose to have one side of the bed be firmer than the other.
Solid slatted base - this can be a good option when paired with the right mattress, firm support, difficult to break and provides good ventilation.
Sprung slatted base - these have a bit more give, but the slats have to be thin enough to bend which makes them a lot more fragile. If someone jumps up and down on this kind of base there is a good chance of breaking it. Many Ikea beds have this.
Platform base - these are flat solid, strong and easy to manufacture, but they give zero ventilation to the mattress so I don't recommend them for a sprung mattress. They might work well with a foam mattress.
For any of these bed frame types look at how the corners are held together, are they really solid and can the bed be easily dis-assembled when moving house?
If you are choosing a slatted base, pay attention to the space between the slats, you want enough to provide ventilation but not such wide gaps that the mattress springs can fall into the gaps.
Does solid wood matter for a bed frame?
Not for comfort, but solid wood will wear and last longer. Don't discount antique beds, if you can find one the right size the build quality can blow away anything modern just pair it with a modern mattress.
When it comes to the mattress, be aware that many 'no-turn' mattresses only have topping layers on one side so they will have a much shorter lifespan than a traditional double-sided mattress. Then you just have to choose between natural fillings or plastics.
posted by Lanark at 5:02 PM on October 11, 2022 [1 favorite]
The options you have are:
Sprung divan - the most expensive option, comfortable but not always the most attractive looking. Many upmarket divans have two separate sides so you can choose to have one side of the bed be firmer than the other.
Solid slatted base - this can be a good option when paired with the right mattress, firm support, difficult to break and provides good ventilation.
Sprung slatted base - these have a bit more give, but the slats have to be thin enough to bend which makes them a lot more fragile. If someone jumps up and down on this kind of base there is a good chance of breaking it. Many Ikea beds have this.
Platform base - these are flat solid, strong and easy to manufacture, but they give zero ventilation to the mattress so I don't recommend them for a sprung mattress. They might work well with a foam mattress.
For any of these bed frame types look at how the corners are held together, are they really solid and can the bed be easily dis-assembled when moving house?
If you are choosing a slatted base, pay attention to the space between the slats, you want enough to provide ventilation but not such wide gaps that the mattress springs can fall into the gaps.
Does solid wood matter for a bed frame?
Not for comfort, but solid wood will wear and last longer. Don't discount antique beds, if you can find one the right size the build quality can blow away anything modern just pair it with a modern mattress.
When it comes to the mattress, be aware that many 'no-turn' mattresses only have topping layers on one side so they will have a much shorter lifespan than a traditional double-sided mattress. Then you just have to choose between natural fillings or plastics.
posted by Lanark at 5:02 PM on October 11, 2022 [1 favorite]
I like to read in bed, and would quite like an upholstered headboard. I currently have an antique bed from the 1930s that I refinished, and use several pillows. Most antique beds are double size.
posted by theora55 at 5:57 PM on October 11, 2022
posted by theora55 at 5:57 PM on October 11, 2022
Oh boy, I just spent a LOT of time choosing a new bed and it was totally worth it, although expensive. Vispring It has some unusual features that you're not going to find normally: It's flippable AND all their mattresses are warrantied for 30 years. But mainly, it's just heavenly to sleep on! For the base, I bought one on Amazon that's solid, looks good and will probably last a long time. Good luck. Mattress shopping is a challenge! As an aside: My daughter bought one called Intellibed that's also expensive but she loves it.
posted by lois1950 at 6:29 PM on October 11, 2022
posted by lois1950 at 6:29 PM on October 11, 2022
Stay away from foam mattresses / beds in a box. I subbed to r/mattress when we were looking, haven’t unsubbed, and routinely see complaints about them sagging in no time, getting hot, etc etc.
and go for a properly constructed hybrid mattress - ie pocket coils (the more the better) with a topper. These are getting harder to find but they exist. For convenience’s sake, go to your local Bay or Sleep Country when they have a sale, research the models, try them out in the store. We both have bad backs, and we’re happy with the firm Serta Perfect Sleeper. Beautyrest and Kingsdown are decent brands too, I hear (both are on sale right now at Sleep Country).
Must reiterate, get as many pocket coils as you can afford. That’s the secret to firm support and pressure relief.
posted by cotton dress sock at 7:00 PM on October 11, 2022 [2 favorites]
and go for a properly constructed hybrid mattress - ie pocket coils (the more the better) with a topper. These are getting harder to find but they exist. For convenience’s sake, go to your local Bay or Sleep Country when they have a sale, research the models, try them out in the store. We both have bad backs, and we’re happy with the firm Serta Perfect Sleeper. Beautyrest and Kingsdown are decent brands too, I hear (both are on sale right now at Sleep Country).
Must reiterate, get as many pocket coils as you can afford. That’s the secret to firm support and pressure relief.
posted by cotton dress sock at 7:00 PM on October 11, 2022 [2 favorites]
Not all composite woods are the same - the cores can be of varying densities and veneers can be of different thicknesses and qualities. I’ve been very happy with my bed frame from EQ3 and find their furniture more solidly made than Crate & Barrel (and a lot more solidly made than West Elm) at a similar price point. (Bonus: it’s a Canadian company!)
posted by A Blue Moon at 7:41 PM on October 11, 2022 [2 favorites]
posted by A Blue Moon at 7:41 PM on October 11, 2022 [2 favorites]
EQ3 has some stunning eco friendly house wears, is Canadian and lasts really well. EQ3 has stores you can visit.
Article is also Canadian and has pretty solid quality as well (online only though)
posted by larthegreat at 1:58 AM on October 12, 2022
Article is also Canadian and has pretty solid quality as well (online only though)
posted by larthegreat at 1:58 AM on October 12, 2022
I saw your update re freight, but I have to +1 the Thuma bed in case figuring out the freight thing seems worth it to you. The bed frame is designed using the same lincoln log-style principles as a sturdy Victorian bed that I moved around from house to house for several decades: There is no hardware to mess with when you assemble it. The various pieces all slat together, which is not only easy but also good for beds that experience a lot of... motion. Suuuuuuper sturdy. I hope and expect to have this bed for the rest of my life. It came with a removable foam piece that operates as a low headboard. At first I thought I'd swap it for a custom headboard, but now I love it. Perfect for reading in bed.
Mattresses are so subjective. I use and love foam mattresses, even though I'm a menopausal woman with hot flashes. I have chronic back pain at L5-S1 that feels better after sleeping on this mattress. I'll never go back to spring mattresses. Coils, bah. I think our latest one is a Leesa but we've also had luck with ordering a random foam mattress from Wayfair for a guest bed. One last bonus about foam mattresses is that they fold a bit for moving, which can be a boon if you live in an old house with narrow staircases or other openings.
posted by ImproviseOrDie at 5:24 AM on October 12, 2022
Mattresses are so subjective. I use and love foam mattresses, even though I'm a menopausal woman with hot flashes. I have chronic back pain at L5-S1 that feels better after sleeping on this mattress. I'll never go back to spring mattresses. Coils, bah. I think our latest one is a Leesa but we've also had luck with ordering a random foam mattress from Wayfair for a guest bed. One last bonus about foam mattresses is that they fold a bit for moving, which can be a boon if you live in an old house with narrow staircases or other openings.
posted by ImproviseOrDie at 5:24 AM on October 12, 2022
I just bought this frame from a relatively small manufacturer called Akron Street. It looks like they ship to Canada. The bed is solid wood, beautifully made, and has a great weight to it. Its slats are the springy kind (like Ikea's I believe), but they could easily be subbed out for stiffer ones.
As for the mattress we just bought, it's not working out so well. It illustrates the problem of ordering online - it is a Saatva Classic, well reviewed and beloved all over the place from what I can tell, but it is both too bouncy and too soft for my partner and I (both long-time futon sleepers). So far we are constantly waking each other up when rolling over because the mattress wiggles (subtly but noticeably) whenever one of us moves. And it's now on the floor while we try it out, as the springy slats of the bed-frame make the wiggle-bounce and softness even worse. We're currently giving it a try a little bit longer, but I suspect we're heading for a return.
In summary: I nth the need to either lay on a mattress before buying, or be prepared to use the company's return option. (If you live in a somewhat small town like I do, finding quality and relatively sustainably-made mattresses to lay on is not so simple).
I'm also unpleasantly aware that our former "cheap futon on a cheap frame it'll be fine" setup was actually better for my partner and me than the "new, high quality, well-researched and thoughtfully chosen" setup that we just selected. I'm afraid I'm not sure what to offer you from this particular discovery, other than to not be swayed by mattress hype, and to keep in mind as you explore that the newfangled fancy option isn't always the best option...
posted by marlys at 6:49 AM on October 12, 2022
As for the mattress we just bought, it's not working out so well. It illustrates the problem of ordering online - it is a Saatva Classic, well reviewed and beloved all over the place from what I can tell, but it is both too bouncy and too soft for my partner and I (both long-time futon sleepers). So far we are constantly waking each other up when rolling over because the mattress wiggles (subtly but noticeably) whenever one of us moves. And it's now on the floor while we try it out, as the springy slats of the bed-frame make the wiggle-bounce and softness even worse. We're currently giving it a try a little bit longer, but I suspect we're heading for a return.
In summary: I nth the need to either lay on a mattress before buying, or be prepared to use the company's return option. (If you live in a somewhat small town like I do, finding quality and relatively sustainably-made mattresses to lay on is not so simple).
I'm also unpleasantly aware that our former "cheap futon on a cheap frame it'll be fine" setup was actually better for my partner and me than the "new, high quality, well-researched and thoughtfully chosen" setup that we just selected. I'm afraid I'm not sure what to offer you from this particular discovery, other than to not be swayed by mattress hype, and to keep in mind as you explore that the newfangled fancy option isn't always the best option...
posted by marlys at 6:49 AM on October 12, 2022
I bought a wool mattress three years ago, and I love it so much. It's sprung, so both pleasingly firm but not hard, and wool is great at staying cool in the summer and warm in the winter. Alas, mine is a UK only brand (herdy.com), but I definitely recommend wool mattresses.
posted by In Your Shell Like at 8:03 AM on October 12, 2022
posted by In Your Shell Like at 8:03 AM on October 12, 2022
My partner bought a Woodforms bed from Circle Furniture in 2019, and it is gorgeous--clean lines + solid wood--and will only improve as it ages. Like the Thuma, you'd have to find a way to get it across the border, but it might be worth it.
posted by dizziest at 9:01 AM on October 12, 2022
posted by dizziest at 9:01 AM on October 12, 2022
I looked at the Thuma and waffled between it and the tall bed from Tatamiroom. I ended up going with the Tatamiroom bed and I LOVE IT. You can buy drawers to go under it and it is super solid.
posted by zoetrope at 9:19 AM on October 12, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by zoetrope at 9:19 AM on October 12, 2022 [1 favorite]
Oh, since you are in Canada you might be interested in Quagga, a company I looked at pretty closely when bed shopping. It was out of stock at the time, but I really wanted their Rustic bed frame.
posted by zoetrope at 2:47 PM on October 20, 2022
posted by zoetrope at 2:47 PM on October 20, 2022
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The legs are beautiful, as is the way the joinery fits together. It doesn't squeak and basically I set it up and it works.
I got a leesa foam mattress for it, and have another bed with a leesa hybrid foam mattress.
I find mattress buying exceptionally hard, we took a leap with the leesa and it's worked out fine. For a while I made notes at all hotels/guest experience about the mattresses, but I don't think it helped in the end. Often a memory foam mattress topper can make a less-than-perfect mattress work until you get another.
posted by typetive at 1:53 PM on October 11, 2022 [4 favorites]