Looking for a funny quote mocking Calvin Coolidge

January 1, 2022 5:11 PM

I'm trying to source a remembered slam on American president Calvin Coolidge and am striking out. To paraphrase from memory: in honor of George Washington's achievements, we erected a shining monument straight up into the sky. For president Coolidge and his lack of achievements, we should instead dig a hole down into the Earth so deep there needs to be guard rails to keep people from falling in.

Does this ring a bell for anyone?

Googling isn't working. I thought the lines were from Allen's Only Yesterday (on MetaFilter, previously) but can't find it there.

posted by doctornemo to Law & Government (6 answers total)

Here is a discussion of 'silent Cal' which begins by noting that there is no memorial to Coolidge in D. C., that he is the last President without a library, and mentions a number of jokes about his fecklessness, but doesn’t say anything about holes in the Earth.

Except indirectly perhaps, in pointing out that Coolidge inherited the family property and business started by his grandfather, which was a lime kiln, and that probably means a pit where lime was mined, very possibly on the Coolidge property.
posted by jamjam at 7:53 PM on January 1, 2022 [1 favorite]

Best answer: There's a quote from "The Aspirin Age" cited here :

“The Washington Monument pierces 555 feet into the sky to symbolize the greatness of George Washington’s contribution to his country. Calvin Coolidge’s monument could be a hole dug straight down into the ground to commemorate all the things he failed to do for his country.”
posted by paperback version at 10:42 PM on January 1, 2022 [7 favorites]

This doesn't relate to your question except tangentally. First person says, "Oh, I just heard that Calvin Coolidge died." The second person, "How can they tell?"
posted by tmdonahue at 6:07 AM on January 2, 2022 [3 favorites]

You might contact the Calvin Coolidge Presidential Library at Forbes Library in Northampton MA (where Coolidge was once mayor) and ask the archivist.

https://forbeslibrary.org/coolidge/
posted by epanalepsis at 6:33 AM on January 2, 2022

Not to be a pedant, but the quip in tmdonahue's comment is from the incomparable Dorothy Parker, if anyone is interested
posted by ivanthenotsoterrible at 9:12 AM on January 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

Response by poster: THAT IS IT!, paperback version! Thank you.

A related book to Allen's.
posted by doctornemo at 10:06 AM on January 2, 2022