Liar, Liar... PANTS ON FIRE!
March 6, 2006 1:52 AM Subscribe
[bust-a-liar filter] Help me bust a liar - I need some info on having a shattered pelvis.
A "friend" has told me that she has a shattered pelvis. Normally I wouldn't think anything of it, and send flowers... but this is coming at the end of a long long long trail of lie after lie, and quite honestly, I'm ready to call her on this last one: she's told me that she shattered her hip in a work accident. I'm curious to know stuff that I'm having trouble finding on the net about experiences. Things like:
exactly how serious is a shattered pelvis? Are we talking serious like, "i broke my back and now cannot move for at least 2 months" serious or "i broke my leg and can navigate around somewhat efficiently in a wheelchair or if needbe, crutches" serious?
how long does it take to heal - I suppose all cases could be different, I'm just looking for a ballpark here.
how long until you can walk? (again, ballpark)
I know it might sound like I'm being callous, but I'm really not - at least I don't think. I'm just curious to see if what she's told me so far is even somewhat in the ballpark with the truth. If it is, I'll leave it alone. But if she's lied even a little bit to get sympathy or attention, I will call her on it.
Thanks in advance!
A "friend" has told me that she has a shattered pelvis. Normally I wouldn't think anything of it, and send flowers... but this is coming at the end of a long long long trail of lie after lie, and quite honestly, I'm ready to call her on this last one: she's told me that she shattered her hip in a work accident. I'm curious to know stuff that I'm having trouble finding on the net about experiences. Things like:
exactly how serious is a shattered pelvis? Are we talking serious like, "i broke my back and now cannot move for at least 2 months" serious or "i broke my leg and can navigate around somewhat efficiently in a wheelchair or if needbe, crutches" serious?
how long does it take to heal - I suppose all cases could be different, I'm just looking for a ballpark here.
how long until you can walk? (again, ballpark)
I know it might sound like I'm being callous, but I'm really not - at least I don't think. I'm just curious to see if what she's told me so far is even somewhat in the ballpark with the truth. If it is, I'll leave it alone. But if she's lied even a little bit to get sympathy or attention, I will call her on it.
Thanks in advance!
Response by poster: This is part of what I've been told so far:
She has a shattered pelvis and 8 broken ribs.
She was put into the hospital yesterday when it happened and she's being released tomorrow.
She made some noise about being laid up in a hospital bed and wanted to go "check out the hospital".
And according to our phone call earlier, she was hiding out in the nurse's lounge in a wheelchair.
posted by damnjezebel at 2:11 AM on March 6, 2006
She has a shattered pelvis and 8 broken ribs.
She was put into the hospital yesterday when it happened and she's being released tomorrow.
She made some noise about being laid up in a hospital bed and wanted to go "check out the hospital".
And according to our phone call earlier, she was hiding out in the nurse's lounge in a wheelchair.
posted by damnjezebel at 2:11 AM on March 6, 2006
I was hit by a car when I was in First Grade or Kindergarden. I'm not even sure how old that would be, as I have no kids of my own to judge school ages by. Anyway, it was a low speed hit, and it only fractured my pelvis. I don't remember too of the early recovery process, but my mother always tells stories to GF's and the like, so I've heard it enough that I get bored. ;)
I was in shock for a week or so and didn't move. They didn't move me around, and were hours away from putting me in a full body cast when I finally moved myself. I'm guessing that this is a child thing though, as I've never heard of an adult going into shock for a week over a broken/shattered/fractured pelvis.
I was very rarely moved during the first few weeks. The nurses were not allowed to change my sheets or move me without a doctor present. The one nurse that attempted to do so, picked me up, and I let out a blood curdling scream so loud the doctor ran in from a ways down the hall. Never saw that nurse again for my stay. I don't remember that, nor do I associate any pain with the experince. I'm unsure if they put me on anything. I had a high pain tolerance even as a kid, and in a pervious burn accident had to have skin peeled off my legs (like a banana) and didn't scream. Just the teary eyed lip trembling thing. So I'm guessing this pain must have been pretty bad.
I was in the hospital for roughly a month. I was on crutches for 3 months. Which was basically all summer. The only activity I could do was swim. I'd probably half those times for adults. I believe the doctors were being overly cautious, as children tend to do stupid stuff and re-injur themselves. I'm guessing the last month I could have gone without them, but they kept me on them to slow me down so I wouldn't aggravate the injury.
My grandfather shattered his pelvis about 10 years ago. I was 1500 miles away, so I don't know the full details. He was in the hospital for quite some time, atleast 2 weeks. I'm sure he was in a wheelchair and did some rehab, and ended up walking with a cane. He's still gracing us with his wise presence, but he uses a walker these days.
Your friend is just cooking up a good one. BTW, Wikipedia shows a symptom of a hip fracture being 'Usually so severe the patient is unable to walk.'
posted by Phynix at 2:24 AM on March 6, 2006
I was in shock for a week or so and didn't move. They didn't move me around, and were hours away from putting me in a full body cast when I finally moved myself. I'm guessing that this is a child thing though, as I've never heard of an adult going into shock for a week over a broken/shattered/fractured pelvis.
I was very rarely moved during the first few weeks. The nurses were not allowed to change my sheets or move me without a doctor present. The one nurse that attempted to do so, picked me up, and I let out a blood curdling scream so loud the doctor ran in from a ways down the hall. Never saw that nurse again for my stay. I don't remember that, nor do I associate any pain with the experince. I'm unsure if they put me on anything. I had a high pain tolerance even as a kid, and in a pervious burn accident had to have skin peeled off my legs (like a banana) and didn't scream. Just the teary eyed lip trembling thing. So I'm guessing this pain must have been pretty bad.
I was in the hospital for roughly a month. I was on crutches for 3 months. Which was basically all summer. The only activity I could do was swim. I'd probably half those times for adults. I believe the doctors were being overly cautious, as children tend to do stupid stuff and re-injur themselves. I'm guessing the last month I could have gone without them, but they kept me on them to slow me down so I wouldn't aggravate the injury.
My grandfather shattered his pelvis about 10 years ago. I was 1500 miles away, so I don't know the full details. He was in the hospital for quite some time, atleast 2 weeks. I'm sure he was in a wheelchair and did some rehab, and ended up walking with a cane. He's still gracing us with his wise presence, but he uses a walker these days.
Your friend is just cooking up a good one. BTW, Wikipedia shows a symptom of a hip fracture being 'Usually so severe the patient is unable to walk.'
posted by Phynix at 2:24 AM on March 6, 2006
On preview: Call said hospital and ask for her room number so you can deliver flowers. When they say they have no patient by that name, call her on it then. ;) BTW, she'll probably tell you she gave you the wrong hospital name. If you are aggravated about that, call the other area hospitals and ask for the same. Only takes a few minutes.
posted by Phynix at 2:27 AM on March 6, 2006
posted by Phynix at 2:27 AM on March 6, 2006
How exactly did she claim this happened?
It seems to me that something that would break 8 ribs and shatter your pelvis must be a pretty large (torso sized) object falling on you, or a pretty serious car accident.
Here's a blog about a guy recovering from a skydiving accident that shattered his pelvis and fractured some vertebrae. I imagine that to shatter your pelvis would likely require fracturing some vertebrae or ribs unless it's an incredibly localized injury.
A sports illustrated swimsuit model suffered a shattered pelvis and went through months of rehab.
A cyclist shattered his pelvis and recovered in less than two months, according to this article, but he's also in athletic shape and it's still worded as if it's miraculous he recovered that fast.
While it's an offhanded note from a page related to colon health, this woman mentions her husband recovered from a shattered pelvis and went back to work in 18 months.
A common thread in all the shattered pelvis stories I could google was injuries to other parts of the body. It sounds like a very serious injury and I have a hard time believing someone would be released from the hospital after just a day or two if they shattered their pelvis and broke 8 ribs.
IANAD, but sending someone home with 8 broken ribs and a shattered pelvis seems like a recipe for a punctured lung and other complications. I definitely see something fishy in this story.
posted by twiggy at 2:46 AM on March 6, 2006
It seems to me that something that would break 8 ribs and shatter your pelvis must be a pretty large (torso sized) object falling on you, or a pretty serious car accident.
Here's a blog about a guy recovering from a skydiving accident that shattered his pelvis and fractured some vertebrae. I imagine that to shatter your pelvis would likely require fracturing some vertebrae or ribs unless it's an incredibly localized injury.
A sports illustrated swimsuit model suffered a shattered pelvis and went through months of rehab.
A cyclist shattered his pelvis and recovered in less than two months, according to this article, but he's also in athletic shape and it's still worded as if it's miraculous he recovered that fast.
While it's an offhanded note from a page related to colon health, this woman mentions her husband recovered from a shattered pelvis and went back to work in 18 months.
A common thread in all the shattered pelvis stories I could google was injuries to other parts of the body. It sounds like a very serious injury and I have a hard time believing someone would be released from the hospital after just a day or two if they shattered their pelvis and broke 8 ribs.
IANAD, but sending someone home with 8 broken ribs and a shattered pelvis seems like a recipe for a punctured lung and other complications. I definitely see something fishy in this story.
posted by twiggy at 2:46 AM on March 6, 2006
Nobody with 8 broken ribs and a shattered pelvis would be released from any responsible hospital in one day. With that much skeletal damage, on a weekend admission, I think they'd still be observing for internal injuries, and the orthopedic docs would just be getting in from the weekend, to put together a surgical reconstruction plan for treating the pelvic injuries. Depending on the severity and number of breaks of the pelvic girdle, and whether these were fractures, crushing injuries, or shearing force injuries involving the legs and hip joints, she could be in for lots and lots of surgery and rehab. If she's saying she's being released today, I doubt the problems are as drastic as she's told you, but a person claiming those kind of injuries fraudulently is pretty sick in other ways, IMHO.
IANAD, but I have had both hip joints completely replaced (femur head and socket) due to AVN. Surgery and rehab to the stage of walking short distances with a walker or canes was about 4 months, but I had both joints replaced, one week apart, and this was a pretty extensive amount of surgical trauma, and I basically had to learn to walk all over again from scratch. I was in the hospital for about a month, and the rest was home based recovery, physical therapy, and outpatient services. 3 months after surgery to have enough leg control to drive, etc. No fun at all. Big life whump.
posted by paulsc at 3:08 AM on March 6, 2006
IANAD, but I have had both hip joints completely replaced (femur head and socket) due to AVN. Surgery and rehab to the stage of walking short distances with a walker or canes was about 4 months, but I had both joints replaced, one week apart, and this was a pretty extensive amount of surgical trauma, and I basically had to learn to walk all over again from scratch. I was in the hospital for about a month, and the rest was home based recovery, physical therapy, and outpatient services. 3 months after surgery to have enough leg control to drive, etc. No fun at all. Big life whump.
posted by paulsc at 3:08 AM on March 6, 2006
I know someone who was hit by a car and endured having her pelvis broken into what the doctors described as "several pieces", as well as plenty of more minor fractures and much bruising. She was in hospital for months, had to have a lot of physiotherapy following several operations and more recently required a hip replacement. Just anecdotal evidence, and I suppose it depends on how to define "shattered", but someone with a broken pelvis isn't walking in a couple of days, according to my limited experience.
posted by normy at 3:13 AM on March 6, 2006
posted by normy at 3:13 AM on March 6, 2006
And according to our phone call earlier, she was hiding out in the nurse's lounge in a wheelchair.
See, that's suspicious, I think. Why would it be called the nurse's lounge if they let patients in there. Sounds to me like she's pretending she's so popular with them, they offered to let her use it. Yeah, sure!
posted by b33j at 3:31 AM on March 6, 2006
See, that's suspicious, I think. Why would it be called the nurse's lounge if they let patients in there. Sounds to me like she's pretending she's so popular with them, they offered to let her use it. Yeah, sure!
posted by b33j at 3:31 AM on March 6, 2006
This is very suspicious. First of all, unless her job is NASCAR driving or she fell off a building, "shattering" a pelvis and fracturing 8 ribs is not a common workplace injury. And it's generally not just an overnight admission to the hospital. It would take months to get over this (many of which might be at a rehab facility or at home).
posted by drpynchon at 3:45 AM on March 6, 2006
posted by drpynchon at 3:45 AM on March 6, 2006
Response by poster: You guys have basically confirmed what I was thinking - she's a pathological liar. She's gone as far as to have a "Friend" email me, saying that she was in the hospital. That was the final straw.
Drpynchon - she works for a popular beverage company in Houston. She claims that she was - and I quote - "accidentally run over by a runaway forklift". I actually spit out my COKE (possible hint as to beverage company) and laughed out loud. I mean, yeah ok even if it was true, it's not too funny. But come on - a runaway forklift?
When I said something like, "wow, you could possibly be set for life!", she made a comment like, "No, I'm having to pay for my own hospital bills." I'm not a terribly smart person, but I'd think that if it happens on their watch at their facility, they would DEFINITELY pay just to make sure there's not a lawsuit.
Oh well, just another one of her lies. Now I just have to figure out what I'm going to say because I know that if I don't plan it out, I'll just go off on her from fifty different directions and lose my focus.
Thanks for giving me evidence, guys. =)
posted by damnjezebel at 4:06 AM on March 6, 2006
Drpynchon - she works for a popular beverage company in Houston. She claims that she was - and I quote - "accidentally run over by a runaway forklift". I actually spit out my COKE (possible hint as to beverage company) and laughed out loud. I mean, yeah ok even if it was true, it's not too funny. But come on - a runaway forklift?
When I said something like, "wow, you could possibly be set for life!", she made a comment like, "No, I'm having to pay for my own hospital bills." I'm not a terribly smart person, but I'd think that if it happens on their watch at their facility, they would DEFINITELY pay just to make sure there's not a lawsuit.
Oh well, just another one of her lies. Now I just have to figure out what I'm going to say because I know that if I don't plan it out, I'll just go off on her from fifty different directions and lose my focus.
Thanks for giving me evidence, guys. =)
posted by damnjezebel at 4:06 AM on March 6, 2006
Here's some advice on how to deal with a pathological liar:
Don't.
Anything you say she'll twist around in a useless attempt to cover her lies. So, just tell her you know she lies, and that she has a problem, and you think she needs a therapist. Then walk away. Don't call, don't hang out, don't email, don't answer her calls.
She needs to realize that there is a consequence to her actions, and that is losing friends.
posted by Phynix at 4:22 AM on March 6, 2006
Don't.
Anything you say she'll twist around in a useless attempt to cover her lies. So, just tell her you know she lies, and that she has a problem, and you think she needs a therapist. Then walk away. Don't call, don't hang out, don't email, don't answer her calls.
She needs to realize that there is a consequence to her actions, and that is losing friends.
posted by Phynix at 4:22 AM on March 6, 2006
but a person claiming those kind of injuries fraudulently is pretty sick in other ways, IMHO.
Agreed. I'd also suggest that a person so hell-bent on "defrauding" someone who's only doing it to garner sympathy (if that's all there is to it) has, themselves, a problem.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 4:48 AM on March 6, 2006
Agreed. I'd also suggest that a person so hell-bent on "defrauding" someone who's only doing it to garner sympathy (if that's all there is to it) has, themselves, a problem.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 4:48 AM on March 6, 2006
Here's some advice on how to deal with a pathological liar:
Don't.
Agreed.
She likes to lie, and you don't like getting lied to. I'd solve this one by ignoring her until such time as she voluntarily said "I'm so sorry that I was full of shit."
posted by I Love Tacos at 5:50 AM on March 6, 2006
Don't.
Agreed.
She likes to lie, and you don't like getting lied to. I'd solve this one by ignoring her until such time as she voluntarily said "I'm so sorry that I was full of shit."
posted by I Love Tacos at 5:50 AM on March 6, 2006
As another option, if you decide not to call her on the lies, why not get a little fun out of her by baiting her just a little by asking specific questions about her stories. Not enough so that it looks like you're calling her on it, just enough so that you can enjoy seeing her dancing to invent new stuff on the fly. Something along the lines of, "So, how did the forklift run away?" "Was the driver hurt?" "Did it stop when it hit you, or did it keep on going and hit something else?" Ask all questions in an absolutely fascinated tone of voice. Sit back and enjoy as the story gets weirder and weirder. Ask more questions the next day and watch her contradict herself.
posted by JanetLand at 6:59 AM on March 6, 2006
posted by JanetLand at 6:59 AM on March 6, 2006
Or how about calling her place of work and asking about the accident? At least then, you can get an idea of if there's even any basis for her claims. "Oh her? She smashed her foot under a crate yesterday...."
posted by Atreides at 7:05 AM on March 6, 2006
posted by Atreides at 7:05 AM on March 6, 2006
Concur with Herr Doktor. I'm three months away from my own doctorate, and have treated similar patients in ICU's and am currently medically treating a patient with a sacrum with several comminuted fractures. He didn't move for a week, and his legs were stuck in the "frog-leg" position, which jams all of the iliosacral structures together so they can't move, because movement=PAIN in that situation. We're treating his pain with 120mg of methadone (ex-heroin user, previously on methadone; this is above the maximum daily dose of 100 mg/day).
8 broken ribs sounds like a recipe for flail chest, an emergency that generally requires intubation and mechanical ventilation. Generally the force required to break that many ribs, or alteratively, a combination of multiple broken ribs in multiple places, involves significant damage to the underlying structures, e.g. lungs and heart, and possibly aorta, vena cava, esophagus, diaphragm, etc. Suffice it to say that that many broken ribs would probably preclude that person talking to you, due to her being intubated and sedated. Never mind tooling around in a wheelchair with a broken pelvis. Egad!
In order for us to more thouroghly analyze her psychiatrically, we need more information. What is your relationship to her? Is there any conceivable reason she would "need" to have had a major accident (i.e., sympathy (secondary gain for those in the trade), or an excuse to get out of some obligation (primary gain), or perhaps a history of psychosis, like paranoia). Either way, sounds like trouble.
posted by gilgul at 7:16 AM on March 6, 2006
8 broken ribs sounds like a recipe for flail chest, an emergency that generally requires intubation and mechanical ventilation. Generally the force required to break that many ribs, or alteratively, a combination of multiple broken ribs in multiple places, involves significant damage to the underlying structures, e.g. lungs and heart, and possibly aorta, vena cava, esophagus, diaphragm, etc. Suffice it to say that that many broken ribs would probably preclude that person talking to you, due to her being intubated and sedated. Never mind tooling around in a wheelchair with a broken pelvis. Egad!
In order for us to more thouroghly analyze her psychiatrically, we need more information. What is your relationship to her? Is there any conceivable reason she would "need" to have had a major accident (i.e., sympathy (secondary gain for those in the trade), or an excuse to get out of some obligation (primary gain), or perhaps a history of psychosis, like paranoia). Either way, sounds like trouble.
posted by gilgul at 7:16 AM on March 6, 2006
This person is doing this to get something, maybe attention, maybe as diversion for some transgression, whatever. If you want to keep her in your life, you may be able to address the need and ignore the lies. People I've been around who do this tend to be narcissists, and I generally minimize their presence in my life, for my own health. They'll suck you dry. If you succeed in nailing her on the lie, you'll become demonized, and she'll spend a lot of energy attacking you.
posted by theora55 at 7:22 AM on March 6, 2006 [1 favorite]
posted by theora55 at 7:22 AM on March 6, 2006 [1 favorite]
Here's some advice on how to deal with a pathological liar:
Don't.
Yes. Or you confront them. This depends on how much of a friend you consider her, of course. But being a pathological liar is a psychological condition (negatively affecting the liar as well as the lie-ees) more than it is just an annoying habit to others, IMO.
I've dealt with more than one pathological liar in my life, one of which was a good and true friend, aside from his neverending confabulations. I chose to go the above route and ignore his implausible stories: they get tiring and it gets easier to "deal" with (passively) after a while - you just roll your eyes, sigh, and share knowing, resigned looks with other people in on his games.
Surely enough, in time I simply lost a friendship, and he just went on to screw other people over with his little white space operas.
Later, hopefully having learnt from this experience, when I had to sit through another PL-er's ready-for-Hollywood life story, I simply flung him a direct "So, why are you a pathological liar, anyway?". Admitted, this was more of an acquaintance than a friend, it was just the two of us and I had had a few beers, but this (unsurprisingly) shocked the hell out of him. I'm not too close to this person, and I can't tell whether he has mended his ways, but I felt I had done a good thing that night. He sure as hell doesn't do it around me anymore.
Too many pathological liars tend to live in their own bubbleverse, unaware of or disregarding the possibility that people *are* on to them, and are mentally shaking their heads in disbelief every time they speak. How can you blame them if people never speak up?
So please, don't dismiss this option straight away.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 7:45 AM on March 6, 2006
Don't.
Yes. Or you confront them. This depends on how much of a friend you consider her, of course. But being a pathological liar is a psychological condition (negatively affecting the liar as well as the lie-ees) more than it is just an annoying habit to others, IMO.
I've dealt with more than one pathological liar in my life, one of which was a good and true friend, aside from his neverending confabulations. I chose to go the above route and ignore his implausible stories: they get tiring and it gets easier to "deal" with (passively) after a while - you just roll your eyes, sigh, and share knowing, resigned looks with other people in on his games.
Surely enough, in time I simply lost a friendship, and he just went on to screw other people over with his little white space operas.
Later, hopefully having learnt from this experience, when I had to sit through another PL-er's ready-for-Hollywood life story, I simply flung him a direct "So, why are you a pathological liar, anyway?". Admitted, this was more of an acquaintance than a friend, it was just the two of us and I had had a few beers, but this (unsurprisingly) shocked the hell out of him. I'm not too close to this person, and I can't tell whether he has mended his ways, but I felt I had done a good thing that night. He sure as hell doesn't do it around me anymore.
Too many pathological liars tend to live in their own bubbleverse, unaware of or disregarding the possibility that people *are* on to them, and are mentally shaking their heads in disbelief every time they speak. How can you blame them if people never speak up?
So please, don't dismiss this option straight away.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 7:45 AM on March 6, 2006
I completely agree with Phynix's advice. Its sad to say, but from what i've seen, dealing with a big time pathalogical liar is just more trouble than its worth; even with a close friend. "suck you dry" sounded like a good description.
posted by yeahyeahyeahwhoo at 7:48 AM on March 6, 2006
posted by yeahyeahyeahwhoo at 7:48 AM on March 6, 2006
Here's some advice on how to deal with a pathological liar:
Don't.
Agreed.
As the ex-wife of a pathological liar, I have to agree as well. I haven't spoken to my ex-husband in five years and I'm still finding out things he's lied about.
(IRS: We can't approve your payment plan because you didn't file a return in 1999.
Me: What do you mean? I prepared the return, gave it to my then-husband to mail, and he said he did... oh.)
posted by Shoeburyness at 7:51 AM on March 6, 2006
Don't.
Agreed.
As the ex-wife of a pathological liar, I have to agree as well. I haven't spoken to my ex-husband in five years and I'm still finding out things he's lied about.
(IRS: We can't approve your payment plan because you didn't file a return in 1999.
Me: What do you mean? I prepared the return, gave it to my then-husband to mail, and he said he did... oh.)
posted by Shoeburyness at 7:51 AM on March 6, 2006
I see you've caught on already, but I'll just chime in to call BS on the "shattered pelvis" as well, having known a friend who achieved one of those. It's not an overnight-at-the-hospital kind of injury. I've heard it described as "feeling like your body is coming apart" and it would be accompanied by much trauma to the surrounding soft tissue. The surgery to repair it would be fairly major. The day after, one would be under constant care, not rolling out of the hospital. My aforementioned friend was walking gingerly after months of therapy, and the pain was still significant.
I broke a femur and was hospitalized for 4 days. Sutures required care, body functions needed monitoring, they began baby steps of physical therapy, etc. With all the painkillers, muscle relaxants, anticoagulants, antibiotics and whatnot after major surgery, they keep a close eye on you for a while.
Also - industrial forklifts are almost unbelievably heavy. Getting "run over" would probably result in pelvis shards and jellied internal organs squirted all over the warehouse floor.
posted by Tubes at 8:02 AM on March 6, 2006
I broke a femur and was hospitalized for 4 days. Sutures required care, body functions needed monitoring, they began baby steps of physical therapy, etc. With all the painkillers, muscle relaxants, anticoagulants, antibiotics and whatnot after major surgery, they keep a close eye on you for a while.
Also - industrial forklifts are almost unbelievably heavy. Getting "run over" would probably result in pelvis shards and jellied internal organs squirted all over the warehouse floor.
posted by Tubes at 8:02 AM on March 6, 2006
Time to show her the thread.
posted by klangklangston at 8:18 AM on March 6, 2006
posted by klangklangston at 8:18 AM on March 6, 2006
Adding a BS call on the pelvis/ribs thing. In both cases you won't be sitting around in a wheelchair. I've cracked a rib a time or two and that's no walk in the park. Eight broken and it would hurt like hell to move, leave alone get out of bed without help, of that I have little doubt.
"Shattered" pelvis is a massive injury. Sure as hell taking a seat shortly after it happened is out of the question.
People who make up stories like this have some diminished sense of self worth and have to come up with this stuff in order for them to elevate themselves in your eyes. I've learned that it's best to just walk away - the same as you'd do with a drug addict or whatever. Life's too short for you to have to deal with this, leave alone enabling this sort of psycho nonsense.
Maybe she can write a book about her injuries, call it A Million Little Pieces or something.
posted by Elvis at 8:38 AM on March 6, 2006
"Shattered" pelvis is a massive injury. Sure as hell taking a seat shortly after it happened is out of the question.
People who make up stories like this have some diminished sense of self worth and have to come up with this stuff in order for them to elevate themselves in your eyes. I've learned that it's best to just walk away - the same as you'd do with a drug addict or whatever. Life's too short for you to have to deal with this, leave alone enabling this sort of psycho nonsense.
Maybe she can write a book about her injuries, call it A Million Little Pieces or something.
posted by Elvis at 8:38 AM on March 6, 2006
Wait, I'm sorry, I just realized it was "run over by a forklift," an accident which happened to a neighbor of mine. He was in the hospital for weeks and never worked again - the accident having shattered his pelvis.
I think of the pain he and his family went through, even now, years later, and how your friend is using the same claim to what is by appearances attention whoring, and I'm offended.
posted by Elvis at 8:42 AM on March 6, 2006
I think of the pain he and his family went through, even now, years later, and how your friend is using the same claim to what is by appearances attention whoring, and I'm offended.
posted by Elvis at 8:42 AM on March 6, 2006
Send her a link to this video.
She's a liar. I had a pelvic fracture and was in the ICU for two days, discharged from the hospital after five, and on crutches for two months. I lost two pints of blood in the surgery to screw me back together.
posted by adamrice at 8:43 AM on March 6, 2006
She's a liar. I had a pelvic fracture and was in the ICU for two days, discharged from the hospital after five, and on crutches for two months. I lost two pints of blood in the surgery to screw me back together.
posted by adamrice at 8:43 AM on March 6, 2006
The fact that she's talking about hiding out in the nurses's lounge makes me think of Munchausen syndrome, where one of the things patients do is suck up to hospital personnel. She may not even be in the hospital, as you idicate, but having the staff be all sympathetic to her and treating her as a "Special" patient may be something she fantasizes about.
Having dealt with people like this before, I agree with everyone else who's said "stay away."
posted by Biblio at 8:45 AM on March 6, 2006
Having dealt with people like this before, I agree with everyone else who's said "stay away."
posted by Biblio at 8:45 AM on March 6, 2006
Could this be an example of Histrionic Personality Disorder?
posted by Araucaria at 11:03 AM on March 6, 2006
posted by Araucaria at 11:03 AM on March 6, 2006
An old girlfriend of mine broke her pelvis (falling off a roof) -- from the x-ray, clearly more serious than being treated and released in 24 hours.
posted by fourstar at 12:22 PM on March 6, 2006
posted by fourstar at 12:22 PM on March 6, 2006
Response by poster: goodnewsforthesane - at one point, I did consider her to be a really good friend. But over the last year, she's turned into this lying WHORE (yes, that's harsh - but I despise liars. moving on). I have no idea what triggered it... or maybe she really was lying this whole time and I just happened to start catching her in lies. They've ranged from stupidly small (lying about not showing up for a girls-night-out because her tooth hurt, and another friend caught her at a club with a guy) to somewhat larger (concocting an entire relationship with a guy that works at a car dealership here, when in fact they never dated AND oh yeah, she found out she's a lesbian and... yeah, it's kinda like that).
gilgul - I've known her for about 3 years or so. I wouldn't call her one of my best friends, but she's up there. Or, at least she was. She has absolutely nothing to gain by lying - not a stitch. I treat all of my friends equally; if she would actually show up to stuff that SHE suggested, we'd probably be better friends. But the reality is, she'll say "Oh, I'll be in town this weekend - let's go see a movie late on Sunday before I leave" and either I won't get a phone call or she'll claim she has a hot date and can't visit. By this point, I'm used to it.
JanetLand - that's totally what I'm going to do the next time I talk to her. Why? I got nothin' else goin' on. =)
Araucaria - Your link was amazingly dead on. That's her to a T. Now, I do have to say that up until a year or so ago, none of that was even remotely true. None of us knows what happened to make her act so dramatically differently. She acts as if everything is ok.
Update: She called me this morning and woke me out of a dead sleep to tell me "she's ok". Apparently, her shattered pelvis isn't bothering her that much, so she got to go to the cafeteria and eat. And........ she's asked me to drive down to houston this weekend and hang out with her. I started to ask more questions (thanks for the hint, JanetLand) and unfortunately, she had to go right then.
On one hand, I want to laugh my ass off at her, and say, "DUDE - why are you even lying? Seriously? What in the fuck do you have to gain by it??" and then on the other hand I just want cut ties and be done with it because she just exhausts me. I know being a friend is not all cupcakes and gummy bears, but being a friend to someone shouldn't be this hard.
posted by damnjezebel at 12:57 PM on March 6, 2006
gilgul - I've known her for about 3 years or so. I wouldn't call her one of my best friends, but she's up there. Or, at least she was. She has absolutely nothing to gain by lying - not a stitch. I treat all of my friends equally; if she would actually show up to stuff that SHE suggested, we'd probably be better friends. But the reality is, she'll say "Oh, I'll be in town this weekend - let's go see a movie late on Sunday before I leave" and either I won't get a phone call or she'll claim she has a hot date and can't visit. By this point, I'm used to it.
JanetLand - that's totally what I'm going to do the next time I talk to her. Why? I got nothin' else goin' on. =)
Araucaria - Your link was amazingly dead on. That's her to a T. Now, I do have to say that up until a year or so ago, none of that was even remotely true. None of us knows what happened to make her act so dramatically differently. She acts as if everything is ok.
Update: She called me this morning and woke me out of a dead sleep to tell me "she's ok". Apparently, her shattered pelvis isn't bothering her that much, so she got to go to the cafeteria and eat. And........ she's asked me to drive down to houston this weekend and hang out with her. I started to ask more questions (thanks for the hint, JanetLand) and unfortunately, she had to go right then.
On one hand, I want to laugh my ass off at her, and say, "DUDE - why are you even lying? Seriously? What in the fuck do you have to gain by it??" and then on the other hand I just want cut ties and be done with it because she just exhausts me. I know being a friend is not all cupcakes and gummy bears, but being a friend to someone shouldn't be this hard.
posted by damnjezebel at 12:57 PM on March 6, 2006
Forklift's definitely do not just "run away". There are usually a few different safety precautions, even for the more simple cherry picker type. Anything from a gas pedal, to a safety plate that is depressed from your body weight.
I call definite bullshit, even before you get into the medical details.
posted by jackofsaxons at 1:29 PM on March 6, 2006
I call definite bullshit, even before you get into the medical details.
posted by jackofsaxons at 1:29 PM on March 6, 2006
Forklift trucks have teeny tiny wheels about six inches in diameter in my experience. It'd be hard for anything bigger than a mouse to be "run over" by one, although I might just buy "knocked over". But their maximum speed is going to be about 15 MPH so it's very hard to imagine.
posted by AmbroseChapel at 1:56 PM on March 6, 2006
posted by AmbroseChapel at 1:56 PM on March 6, 2006
I think we should speculate about what happens when she gets called on it.
You surprise her out jogging, say, and ask "how come your pelvis recovered so quickly?" -- what will she say?
She may confess the whole thing and apologise for being so insane, but I don't know. It's more likely that she tries to trump all previous lies with a new and much bigger one. "I'm sorry I told you such crazy lies. I only do it because I'm a victim of satanic ritual abuse" or something.
posted by AmbroseChapel at 1:59 PM on March 6, 2006
You surprise her out jogging, say, and ask "how come your pelvis recovered so quickly?" -- what will she say?
She may confess the whole thing and apologise for being so insane, but I don't know. It's more likely that she tries to trump all previous lies with a new and much bigger one. "I'm sorry I told you such crazy lies. I only do it because I'm a victim of satanic ritual abuse" or something.
posted by AmbroseChapel at 1:59 PM on March 6, 2006
Speaking from my own experience with a pathological liar of an ex-lover, if you try to confront her about it, you're likely to get more attempts at manipulation, or more lies, and it's probably going to be frustrating, or disgusting. It's unlikely to really change anything for her - or you - at all.
Best just to walk away.
posted by dilettante at 5:00 PM on March 6, 2006
Best just to walk away.
posted by dilettante at 5:00 PM on March 6, 2006
Yeah--I've seen a shattered pelvix, pretty severe.
Not a treat-and-release in 24 hr. thing. She may have a fractured pelvis--not as severe (depending on the fracture).
Don't call her on it. It won't do you any good.
posted by 6:1 at 8:24 PM on March 6, 2006
Not a treat-and-release in 24 hr. thing. She may have a fractured pelvis--not as severe (depending on the fracture).
Don't call her on it. It won't do you any good.
posted by 6:1 at 8:24 PM on March 6, 2006
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by handee at 2:02 AM on March 6, 2006