Yay or nay: breastfeeding during pregnancy?
September 9, 2018 12:29 PM Subscribe
Asking for a friend: Is it a good idea for a healthy woman to breastfeed one baby while pregnant with the second? Prefer science, but anecdata is ok too.
Friend's family-planning goal is to have a second child very close in age to the first, who's currently a few months old.
The Baby:
Baby is very healthy: has consistently been 95th percentile for weight / height / head circumference since birth, sleeps well, and has hit all physical and cognitive milestones a few weeks ahead of schedule.
Baby has been exclusively breastfed on demand - approx 5 oz every 3 hours.
The Mother:
She'll be 40 and healthy.
Her first pregnancy went well- nausea but very little vomiting, and anemia fatigue that hugely improved with iron infusions.
She takes vitamins, is reasonably active at a healthy weight, and eats well.
She has a good breastmilk supply, easily pumping 4-6 oz in one session per day, in addition to feeding her huge baby on demand all day & night.
The pregnancy plan:
Stockpile frozen breastmilk.
Start Baby Led Weaning at 5-7 months (based on Baby's interest and physical coordination).
Gradually taper calories from breastmilk by introducing... what? Formula? Cow milk? Cereal mixed with frozen breastmilk?
Get pregnant when Baby is enjoying solids, maybe at 7-8 months old.
The 2-babies plan:
When pregnant, continue to nurse Baby1 for comfort, perhaps just at night
Gradually wean Baby1 a few months before Baby2 is born.
Nurse Baby2 exclusively until they've established a healthy weight & milk supply.
Occasionally tandem nurse Baby1 for comfort for another year.
The questions:
1. Is this a good plan?
2. When weaning, what should she feed Baby1 to help taper breastmilk calories?
3. Will breastfeeding a few ounces a day harm the developing fetus?
Friend's family-planning goal is to have a second child very close in age to the first, who's currently a few months old.
The Baby:
Baby is very healthy: has consistently been 95th percentile for weight / height / head circumference since birth, sleeps well, and has hit all physical and cognitive milestones a few weeks ahead of schedule.
Baby has been exclusively breastfed on demand - approx 5 oz every 3 hours.
The Mother:
She'll be 40 and healthy.
Her first pregnancy went well- nausea but very little vomiting, and anemia fatigue that hugely improved with iron infusions.
She takes vitamins, is reasonably active at a healthy weight, and eats well.
She has a good breastmilk supply, easily pumping 4-6 oz in one session per day, in addition to feeding her huge baby on demand all day & night.
The pregnancy plan:
Stockpile frozen breastmilk.
Start Baby Led Weaning at 5-7 months (based on Baby's interest and physical coordination).
Gradually taper calories from breastmilk by introducing... what? Formula? Cow milk? Cereal mixed with frozen breastmilk?
Get pregnant when Baby is enjoying solids, maybe at 7-8 months old.
The 2-babies plan:
When pregnant, continue to nurse Baby1 for comfort, perhaps just at night
Gradually wean Baby1 a few months before Baby2 is born.
Nurse Baby2 exclusively until they've established a healthy weight & milk supply.
Occasionally tandem nurse Baby1 for comfort for another year.
The questions:
1. Is this a good plan?
2. When weaning, what should she feed Baby1 to help taper breastmilk calories?
3. Will breastfeeding a few ounces a day harm the developing fetus?
Whether or not she is able to maintain sufficient supply--and whether she'll still be comfortable nursing during the pregnancy or tandem nursing--is entirely individual and difficult to predict. I have a friend with 3 under 5. She nursed through her second pregnancy and tandem nursed, developed strong nursing aversion while pregnant with the third and weaned the older two. The few times they nursed after the birth of the third, she felt wildly uncomfortable.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 1:20 PM on September 9, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 1:20 PM on September 9, 2018 [2 favorites]
I could second everything Catseye said but as a mom of two a year apart, right when I thought "God, I'm so glad breastfeeding is going well since everything else is on fire" my baby hadn't gained weight at his 3mo well baby check and that's how I found out I was pregnant with #2 and that I might have been making some kind of liquid that kept #1's diapers normal but it didn't contain any actual nutrients.
So if the plan is to wait until baby is eating some solids or transitioning to other liquid sources of calories, that's a good idea, based on my experience.
(Baby #2 had no competition for breastmilk and was just as fat and roly poly as breastfed babies tend to be)
posted by annathea at 1:21 PM on September 9, 2018 [5 favorites]
So if the plan is to wait until baby is eating some solids or transitioning to other liquid sources of calories, that's a good idea, based on my experience.
(Baby #2 had no competition for breastmilk and was just as fat and roly poly as breastfed babies tend to be)
posted by annathea at 1:21 PM on September 9, 2018 [5 favorites]
Anecdata: BLW doesn't really help with weaning in my experience. BLW is more about exploring the food, feeding purees is more about replacing calories from breastmilk with calories from food.
posted by gakiko at 1:24 PM on September 9, 2018 [8 favorites]
posted by gakiko at 1:24 PM on September 9, 2018 [8 favorites]
If she’s exclusively breastfeeding, her fertility may not return according to the schedule she’s set. I didn’t get a period for 13 months. When spacing pregnancies very close together, it’s not uncommon to have to switch your baby to formula in order for fertility to return so you can become pregnant with the second.
1. I agree the spacing is less than ideal - a full year between pregnancies would be healthier. Excellent nutrition will be important.
2. Breastmilk (including donor milk or purchased breastmilk) or formula needs to be the primary source of nutrition til one year of age.
3. No, it won’t. Later in pregnancy, in some women, nipple stimulation can cause contractions. If she’s at risk for premature labor or if there are other complications in her pregnancy this is something she would want to talk to her healthcare provider about.
posted by pecanpies at 2:33 PM on September 9, 2018 [6 favorites]
1. I agree the spacing is less than ideal - a full year between pregnancies would be healthier. Excellent nutrition will be important.
2. Breastmilk (including donor milk or purchased breastmilk) or formula needs to be the primary source of nutrition til one year of age.
3. No, it won’t. Later in pregnancy, in some women, nipple stimulation can cause contractions. If she’s at risk for premature labor or if there are other complications in her pregnancy this is something she would want to talk to her healthcare provider about.
posted by pecanpies at 2:33 PM on September 9, 2018 [6 favorites]
I did this (so just anecdata) but let me tell you, it really, really hurt for a long time (and I have freakishly tough nipples, breastfeeding never hurt for me, even when I first started.) My nipples were very sore, and if I wasn't so lazy/tired (weaning was tough for me) I would have quit. Just something to keep in mind!
posted by heavenknows at 3:01 PM on September 9, 2018
posted by heavenknows at 3:01 PM on September 9, 2018
Just some anecdata.. my 15 month old boy is allergic to cows milk, throws up all formula (hates the taste so he gags and then vomits) and is very behind on eating solids/purees. So if I couldn't keep pumping/breastfeeding now I'm not sure what he would eat. My plan was also to gradually wean after 6 months, but here we are. Not to be a debbie downer, but maybe think of a backup plan if the first baby ends up being more difficult than expected. Obviously things can come up at any age and there's no perfectly easy time to have a second kid. But I am so much more exhausted trying to feed my kid now than when he was a 6 month old and I couldn't imagine doing this while pregnant and I would be scared of losing my milk supply if pregnancy does indeed affect it. And yea, sore tender nipples while pregnant sounds like hell.
posted by never.was.and.never.will.be. at 8:58 PM on September 9, 2018
posted by never.was.and.never.will.be. at 8:58 PM on September 9, 2018
No scientific knowledge, but my first two are 15.5 months apart and the 2nd and 3rd are 12. 5 months apart. About 29 months for 3. My wife breast fed while pregnant. All three were thriving then and are thriving now 22 years later. My boys are both 6 feet tall and athletic and above average intelligence. My daughter is average size, much better looking than her parents and will be attending law school next year.
During their youth, they were rarely sick and always in the top 10% of whatever metrics the pediatrician was using.
Having said that, I think it took a toll on my wife long term. When we considered #4 for all of 2 minutes, she just said that she wanted her body back 4 years of being pregnant and/or breast feeding seemed to screw with her hormones. It also was a mental toll coupled with sleep deprivation. Her breasts and nipples were sore, very sore for 4 years. Not fun.
We had 3 in diapers for a while. Fwiw, I was often the default poop diaper changer bc I would see how much she had suffered and think a stinky diaper was easy compared to being pregnant and breast feeding.
Overall, and in hindsight, we are still very happy with the decision to have them so close together. They are close with each other yet very different personality wise. There was a high level of competitiveness between the boys. To this day they will compete with each other over anything. I think that is what I would keep an eye on if your friend has the 2nd right away and they are the same sex
posted by AugustWest at 9:45 PM on September 9, 2018
During their youth, they were rarely sick and always in the top 10% of whatever metrics the pediatrician was using.
Having said that, I think it took a toll on my wife long term. When we considered #4 for all of 2 minutes, she just said that she wanted her body back 4 years of being pregnant and/or breast feeding seemed to screw with her hormones. It also was a mental toll coupled with sleep deprivation. Her breasts and nipples were sore, very sore for 4 years. Not fun.
We had 3 in diapers for a while. Fwiw, I was often the default poop diaper changer bc I would see how much she had suffered and think a stinky diaper was easy compared to being pregnant and breast feeding.
Overall, and in hindsight, we are still very happy with the decision to have them so close together. They are close with each other yet very different personality wise. There was a high level of competitiveness between the boys. To this day they will compete with each other over anything. I think that is what I would keep an eye on if your friend has the 2nd right away and they are the same sex
posted by AugustWest at 9:45 PM on September 9, 2018
Yeah, breastfeeding can really mess with your fertility. Just as a data point, I did not ovulate at all while breastfeeding. I'm 37 and age is pretty much a factor too.
posted by Jilder at 11:18 PM on September 9, 2018
posted by Jilder at 11:18 PM on September 9, 2018
Same - I didn't get my period back until 17 months postpartum (at age 39). But I did then, despite still breastfeeding.
I think I'd talk to a doctor and maybe also a nutritionist about the spacing and what vitamins to be taking.
Stockpiling milk is a good idea (though I know it's easier said than done).
posted by slidell at 12:32 AM on September 10, 2018
I think I'd talk to a doctor and maybe also a nutritionist about the spacing and what vitamins to be taking.
Stockpiling milk is a good idea (though I know it's easier said than done).
posted by slidell at 12:32 AM on September 10, 2018
Anecdata: Friend has four kids both pairs were born approximately 10 months apart. They're all fine healthy kids, but breastfeeding is also sometimes birth control by itself. Depends on the mother, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.
posted by koolkat at 2:46 AM on September 10, 2018
posted by koolkat at 2:46 AM on September 10, 2018
I just wanted to second August west. I have 2 boys 11 months apart and they are now 2 and 3... it’s been really hard. I’m not saying it won’t be worth it in the end but we were blissfully happy parents of a really cheerful baby thinking we were doing fantastic and then the second was high need and it’s been... yeah... really hard. So to answer your question, yes, this is a good plan. But your friend should definitely go into it with the knowledge it might turn out challenging.
posted by catspajammies at 3:01 AM on September 10, 2018
posted by catspajammies at 3:01 AM on September 10, 2018
Does she know if she's even ovulating? That would be my biggest concern, with whether she wants to continue breastfeeding or not as nothing but her personal preference.
posted by lydhre at 11:43 AM on September 10, 2018
posted by lydhre at 11:43 AM on September 10, 2018
This is pretty hard to predict, because of the variables already mentioned.
Anecdata: I got pregnant (not on purpose) with my second when my older child was 15 months old. I was 35 at the time, and had gotten my period back at around 10 months postpartum. I was still breastfeeding him about 4 times a day, and had planned on nursing him longer. I had terrible nipple pain from almost the moment I became pregnant, which progressed into aversions. It was so bad that I had to stop nursing when I was 20 weeks pregnant. I ended up nursing my second until he was about 2.5, and I have to say that 5+ years straight of pregnancy and nursing was tough on my body, especially being an older mom.
posted by apricot at 2:04 PM on September 10, 2018 [1 favorite]
Anecdata: I got pregnant (not on purpose) with my second when my older child was 15 months old. I was 35 at the time, and had gotten my period back at around 10 months postpartum. I was still breastfeeding him about 4 times a day, and had planned on nursing him longer. I had terrible nipple pain from almost the moment I became pregnant, which progressed into aversions. It was so bad that I had to stop nursing when I was 20 weeks pregnant. I ended up nursing my second until he was about 2.5, and I have to say that 5+ years straight of pregnancy and nursing was tough on my body, especially being an older mom.
posted by apricot at 2:04 PM on September 10, 2018 [1 favorite]
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2 - formula, or frozen breastmilk if she has a ton of that already
3 - no.
Lots of info on Kellymom here.
Anecdotally I know several people who’ve done this with a slightly bigger age gap, and the biggest issues were sore nipples during the first trimester, the older child going off breastmilk during the second half of pregnancy, and taking longer than planned to get pregnant due to breastfeeding reducing fertility.
posted by Catseye at 1:06 PM on September 9, 2018 [1 favorite]