I'm afraid of finishing grad school, before I start it!
June 30, 2017 7:05 AM Subscribe
In the fall I'll be entering a professional graduate program. I'm excited about it and I think that it makes sense for me. I'll be entering a relatively competitive field but I already have pretty good experience from my past education, current experience, some decent connections. Despite this, I am *already* getting anxiety about the job search that is bound to follow finishing this degree. How can I best deal with this?
I know, I feel silly for being anxious about something that's a couple years away. I think it stems from the fact that I had a really AWFUL experience finding my first job after completing my undergrad. 7 years ago, I received my degree in a relatively "useless" field and spent the 2 following years basically... doing nothing, I guess I was somewhat depressed. I worked here and there in retail, but nothing solid.
I ended up enrolling in a diploma course at a local community college, finished it and got a job in my current field (about 6 mos. after graduating with the diploma). I've been in that position for almost 3 years now. I'll still be working here part-time as I complete my masters program. I know the situation I'm in now is completely different from when I got my BA. Those 2 years were really rough and terrible, so I am afraid that the same thing will happen again when I finish this program. I know it (probably) won't, but it just makes me doubt myself.
I feel embarrassed by those 2 "wasted" years of my life and really regret not choosing something more "useful" when I was an undergrad, that would have made it easier for me to find a job after finishing university. I know I can't change that now, but those feelings are still lingering with me. How do I get over this and forget these feelings and just move ON and pursue my grad degree with a sense of confidence?
I know, I feel silly for being anxious about something that's a couple years away. I think it stems from the fact that I had a really AWFUL experience finding my first job after completing my undergrad. 7 years ago, I received my degree in a relatively "useless" field and spent the 2 following years basically... doing nothing, I guess I was somewhat depressed. I worked here and there in retail, but nothing solid.
I ended up enrolling in a diploma course at a local community college, finished it and got a job in my current field (about 6 mos. after graduating with the diploma). I've been in that position for almost 3 years now. I'll still be working here part-time as I complete my masters program. I know the situation I'm in now is completely different from when I got my BA. Those 2 years were really rough and terrible, so I am afraid that the same thing will happen again when I finish this program. I know it (probably) won't, but it just makes me doubt myself.
I feel embarrassed by those 2 "wasted" years of my life and really regret not choosing something more "useful" when I was an undergrad, that would have made it easier for me to find a job after finishing university. I know I can't change that now, but those feelings are still lingering with me. How do I get over this and forget these feelings and just move ON and pursue my grad degree with a sense of confidence?
Start hammering those connections now for opportunities to get hands-on experience in the field. Begin working looking now for a part-time entry level job that is at least adjacent to the field you will be working in, and once you find one, take it and quit your current job. As NoraCharles says, once you are in your program, start looking for jobs you might be interested in doing once you graduate and start scheduling "informational interviews" with people who hire for those jobs and let them know you will be looking for something in their field once you graduate. Try and tie any projects you might be doing in your program into real world problems, and discuss them with your connections in the field who have those problems. When your project is done, send them a copy.
If you can tell us what the program/field is (you can use the Contact Form at the bottom of the page and a Mod will post your update in the thread) we will probably have more specific examples of things you can do now/soon to begin positioning yourself for an easy job search when you graduate.
posted by Rock Steady at 7:43 AM on June 30, 2017 [1 favorite]
If you can tell us what the program/field is (you can use the Contact Form at the bottom of the page and a Mod will post your update in the thread) we will probably have more specific examples of things you can do now/soon to begin positioning yourself for an easy job search when you graduate.
posted by Rock Steady at 7:43 AM on June 30, 2017 [1 favorite]
Don't dismiss your concern out of hand, actually. Emotions like fear aren't the enemy. They exist to communicate important things to us.
Depending on the field and whether you are paying out of pocket or not, grad school isn't always the best career move, especially a terminal master's degree.
Perhaps that is what your fear is communicating?
posted by Stewriffic at 8:21 AM on June 30, 2017
Depending on the field and whether you are paying out of pocket or not, grad school isn't always the best career move, especially a terminal master's degree.
Perhaps that is what your fear is communicating?
posted by Stewriffic at 8:21 AM on June 30, 2017
As far as not regretting "wasting" two years of your life...what things happened during that time period you were happy about? People you met? Things you experienced? Insights you had about yourself? Would you be where you are today if you hadn't spent those two years figuring stuff out?
I spent some years in a grad program beyond the point that I was happy or certain I would stay in that field. I'm gearing up to go back to school in another field now, and sometimes I regret how much time I spent not doing my current trajectory. However, when I think about what I would have missed out on (friendships, life experience, self assurance, wisdom that comes from just being alive), I realize that even though in some respects I wasted time career-wise, it wasn't wasted time. Maybe that kind of framing can help you, too.
posted by Illuminated Clocks at 9:51 AM on June 30, 2017 [2 favorites]
I spent some years in a grad program beyond the point that I was happy or certain I would stay in that field. I'm gearing up to go back to school in another field now, and sometimes I regret how much time I spent not doing my current trajectory. However, when I think about what I would have missed out on (friendships, life experience, self assurance, wisdom that comes from just being alive), I realize that even though in some respects I wasted time career-wise, it wasn't wasted time. Maybe that kind of framing can help you, too.
posted by Illuminated Clocks at 9:51 AM on June 30, 2017 [2 favorites]
There are two kinds of worry: helpful worry, where it lets you know that there is a future problems that you need to prepare for now and unhelpful worry where it ties you up with anxiety without doing you any practical good.
Use the helpful part of the worry to figure out what you can do in the next few years to increase your chance of getting a job later. Two very important rules: WRITE it down and make sure your plan includes very specific action items and which ones need to be work on now (David Allen's Getting Things Done taught me a lot about this.) The problem is that if you don't write it down or you don't get very specific the action and a realistic time line, the whole list of things starts floating widely in your head and you will feel constantly on edge about not doing more without any clear sense of what you have actually done already and what "more" even looks like.
Once you have a clear plan, then every time you get anxious just check your plan. Does it still look good? If not, what do you need to add or change? (Be specific, have time line for it and add it to the plan) Then stop worrying!!! If your plan is on track then you tell yourself firmly you have done what you can, time to stop thinking about it. Planning and doing are OK, directionless worry is not.
posted by metahawk at 6:07 PM on June 30, 2017 [1 favorite]
Use the helpful part of the worry to figure out what you can do in the next few years to increase your chance of getting a job later. Two very important rules: WRITE it down and make sure your plan includes very specific action items and which ones need to be work on now (David Allen's Getting Things Done taught me a lot about this.) The problem is that if you don't write it down or you don't get very specific the action and a realistic time line, the whole list of things starts floating widely in your head and you will feel constantly on edge about not doing more without any clear sense of what you have actually done already and what "more" even looks like.
Once you have a clear plan, then every time you get anxious just check your plan. Does it still look good? If not, what do you need to add or change? (Be specific, have time line for it and add it to the plan) Then stop worrying!!! If your plan is on track then you tell yourself firmly you have done what you can, time to stop thinking about it. Planning and doing are OK, directionless worry is not.
posted by metahawk at 6:07 PM on June 30, 2017 [1 favorite]
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Good luck!
posted by NoraCharles at 7:12 AM on June 30, 2017 [2 favorites]