Make tangly hair less tangly/velcroey & more slippery?
May 21, 2017 4:39 PM Subscribe
How can I make my tangly/velcroey hair very very slippery and untangly? (I'd rather not use silicones, which is what most detangling sprays seem to be mostly composed of, because I think they do actually make my hair more birds-nest-y after a couple of days.)
My hair has always been tangly. I don't use any heat on it (I let it air-dry). I use conditioner every time I wash it. Still, it's tangly. (It does have split ends in it, but trimming the ends doesn't get rid of the ones that are at different heights.) I'm not practised at braiding, but still, I think the way my hair is has something to do with how hard I find braiding. My hair is a bit velcroey and likes to stick together (and it was like that even when I had hair too short to put in a ponytail and with no split ends). (So split ends may possibly be making it worse but they are not the whole story.) When I'm holding the three braiding-strands (after detangling!) apart close to my head, they are trying to join together again at the bottom of the hair.
I'd really love if I could make my hair less tanglesome, even when I'm not trying to braid it.
I really want to do French braids, and I can't really manage decent-looking normal braids.
My hair has always been tangly. I don't use any heat on it (I let it air-dry). I use conditioner every time I wash it. Still, it's tangly. (It does have split ends in it, but trimming the ends doesn't get rid of the ones that are at different heights.) I'm not practised at braiding, but still, I think the way my hair is has something to do with how hard I find braiding. My hair is a bit velcroey and likes to stick together (and it was like that even when I had hair too short to put in a ponytail and with no split ends). (So split ends may possibly be making it worse but they are not the whole story.) When I'm holding the three braiding-strands (after detangling!) apart close to my head, they are trying to join together again at the bottom of the hair.
I'd really love if I could make my hair less tanglesome, even when I'm not trying to braid it.
I really want to do French braids, and I can't really manage decent-looking normal braids.
Try conditioners containing Cetyl Alcohol, Stearyl Accohol, or Cetearyl Alcohol at the top of the ingredients list. I know "alcohol" sounds drying but those three are actually lubricants.
Aussie Moist, Aussie Moist 3 Minute Miracle, and Herbal Essence conditioner formulations for dry hair are good sources of these ingredients. They are common ingredients so you should have no trouble finding a conditioner with these alcohols listed as the first ingredient after water, and no silicones.
Consider trying techniques used on curly natural hair for Black or mixed-race women, who are seriously the world leaders in hair verbs like "moisturizing", "detangling", and "eradicating dryness". YouTube has tons of great videos.
Also, use less shampoo, or even no shampoo (look up co-washing) and experiment with doing that sometimes- shampoo roughs up your hair.
Whenever your hair is wet, rub a little conditioner through the length after rinsing, and leave it in there like a styling product. Avoid the scalp if your roots tend to get flat.
posted by pseudostrabismus at 4:55 PM on May 21, 2017 [3 favorites]
Aussie Moist, Aussie Moist 3 Minute Miracle, and Herbal Essence conditioner formulations for dry hair are good sources of these ingredients. They are common ingredients so you should have no trouble finding a conditioner with these alcohols listed as the first ingredient after water, and no silicones.
Consider trying techniques used on curly natural hair for Black or mixed-race women, who are seriously the world leaders in hair verbs like "moisturizing", "detangling", and "eradicating dryness". YouTube has tons of great videos.
Also, use less shampoo, or even no shampoo (look up co-washing) and experiment with doing that sometimes- shampoo roughs up your hair.
Whenever your hair is wet, rub a little conditioner through the length after rinsing, and leave it in there like a styling product. Avoid the scalp if your roots tend to get flat.
posted by pseudostrabismus at 4:55 PM on May 21, 2017 [3 favorites]
they are trying to join together again at the bottom of the hair.
This is a hallmark of curly hair. The number of people who think they don't have curly hair but do is surprising. Do the curly hair test. If you have curly hair and start drying it correctly, it will stop velcroing and be able to hang in its natural locks. Using Be Curly or olive oil or whatever to lock it from the bottom helps hugely. (I just use solid coconut oil these days.)
See if this helps at all!
posted by DarlingBri at 4:56 PM on May 21, 2017 [8 favorites]
This is a hallmark of curly hair. The number of people who think they don't have curly hair but do is surprising. Do the curly hair test. If you have curly hair and start drying it correctly, it will stop velcroing and be able to hang in its natural locks. Using Be Curly or olive oil or whatever to lock it from the bottom helps hugely. (I just use solid coconut oil these days.)
See if this helps at all!
posted by DarlingBri at 4:56 PM on May 21, 2017 [8 favorites]
Seconding DarlingBri - I have wavy hair that was treated as straight for most of my life and this is exactly how my hair is if I don't bother to wash/dry it like it's curly.
posted by Amanda B at 5:03 PM on May 21, 2017
posted by Amanda B at 5:03 PM on May 21, 2017
A couple of times I went and got a keratin treatment, which does exactly what you want.
posted by showbiz_liz at 5:23 PM on May 21, 2017
posted by showbiz_liz at 5:23 PM on May 21, 2017
I have curly hair. Using Devacurl products, specifically the NoPoo and the daily conditioner, dramatically changed the texture of my hair for the better. Even if you don't have curly hair, you might try a non-sudsing "nopoo" to keep frizz down. As a few people have suggested, treating your hair like it's curly may help. It is a very gentle approach. Here's a link to the Curly Girl method.
posted by bluespark25 at 5:50 PM on May 21, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by bluespark25 at 5:50 PM on May 21, 2017 [1 favorite]
I also use solid coconut oil for this. My hair will start to mat within a couple days of not being washed, it's very dry. I've tried all kinds of stuff and coconut oil is cheap and easy and it works.
I do sometimes use the the Curly Girl stuff but the conditioner is almost too de-tangling, it makes my hair feel weird. I've found that Shea Moisture conditioner and coconut oil works great. If you buy them at Sally Beauty they have an instore coconut based co-wash in a white tub that's magical- it cleans well but conditions too. On the rare occasion I need to shampoo my hair I do use the Curly Girl Low or No Po, whichever I have on hand.
posted by fshgrl at 7:35 PM on May 21, 2017 [2 favorites]
I do sometimes use the the Curly Girl stuff but the conditioner is almost too de-tangling, it makes my hair feel weird. I've found that Shea Moisture conditioner and coconut oil works great. If you buy them at Sally Beauty they have an instore coconut based co-wash in a white tub that's magical- it cleans well but conditions too. On the rare occasion I need to shampoo my hair I do use the Curly Girl Low or No Po, whichever I have on hand.
posted by fshgrl at 7:35 PM on May 21, 2017 [2 favorites]
Reducing how many split ends you develop by caring for your hair more gently will help your hair be less velcro-y. Use a wide toothed comb instead of a brush, never pile it into your scalp and "scrub" it when shampooing, detangle from the bottom up, oil your ends before shampooing, use protective styles and a satin pillowcase or sleep cap.
If this is primarily a styling problem for you, (ie you want it to change because you want to braid), remember that slippery hair is much harder to style than clingy hair; slippery hair tends to just slip out of things like braids. Try braiding your hair while it's damp with a little conditioner or mousse in it for manageability.
Personally, I've always needed to continually, gently detangle my hair with my fingers while braiding, as the bottom wants to clump together, and I think that's pretty normal; after a while it becomes second nature to seperate the strands while you braid them.
Braiding hair is a different motor skill than braiding three pieces of string, since you're working with thousands of strands at once, that might all have different plans. Keep practicing. I've been braiding my own hair for about 20 years and I still get fucky looking, frustrating braids sometimes.
posted by windykites at 7:46 PM on May 21, 2017 [2 favorites]
If this is primarily a styling problem for you, (ie you want it to change because you want to braid), remember that slippery hair is much harder to style than clingy hair; slippery hair tends to just slip out of things like braids. Try braiding your hair while it's damp with a little conditioner or mousse in it for manageability.
Personally, I've always needed to continually, gently detangle my hair with my fingers while braiding, as the bottom wants to clump together, and I think that's pretty normal; after a while it becomes second nature to seperate the strands while you braid them.
Braiding hair is a different motor skill than braiding three pieces of string, since you're working with thousands of strands at once, that might all have different plans. Keep practicing. I've been braiding my own hair for about 20 years and I still get fucky looking, frustrating braids sometimes.
posted by windykites at 7:46 PM on May 21, 2017 [2 favorites]
Oh, and avoid heat and never scrub it dry or turban your towel, instead wrap your hair in the towel "mother Mary style".
posted by windykites at 7:48 PM on May 21, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by windykites at 7:48 PM on May 21, 2017 [1 favorite]
A solid, cheap alternative to the DevaCurl products--with lots of slip and no silicones--is Suave Naturals (now called "Suave Essentials") tropical coconut conditioner. A hairdresser taught me an excellent tip for getting snaggles out in the shower: conditioner works like hand cream. You want to apply enough to your hair that it's been absorbed to the extent that your hands slip over the hair. So, flip your head over. Apply conditioner from tips of the hair up (you don't need to get the roots). If the hair still pulls or catches when you run your hands over it like you're running your hand over a ponytail, you haven't applied enough conditioner. Then you can brush your hair out with a Tangle Teezer or a wide toothed comb.
posted by Miss T.Horn at 7:49 PM on May 21, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by Miss T.Horn at 7:49 PM on May 21, 2017 [2 favorites]
I have used a lot of higher-end, expensive products, and by far the best one I have found is Uniq One by Revlon. You only need a little bit and your hair immediately detangles and feels lovely and slippery, and I can't tell I have product on my hair once it has dried. (And no silicones).
posted by nanook at 8:01 PM on May 21, 2017
posted by nanook at 8:01 PM on May 21, 2017
This was my hair and my holy grail product to get rid of tangles is Davines' Love Curly Cream. Difference is night and day.
posted by Marinara at 9:46 PM on May 21, 2017
posted by Marinara at 9:46 PM on May 21, 2017
I have this hair and like protein treatments, which I often leave in overnight. I also only heat style with a bonnet dryer if I have to heat style. Use way more conditioner than you think you should in the shower and comb through with a wide toothed comb. Wrap it in a microfiber towel or a linen towel after showering. Touching it as little as possible helps in general.
posted by sockermom at 11:15 PM on May 21, 2017
posted by sockermom at 11:15 PM on May 21, 2017
I highly recommend Ouidad's detangling double tooth comb. The right tools reduce split ends and breakage, which cuts down on the tangly feeling you're describing
posted by spunweb at 4:53 AM on May 22, 2017
posted by spunweb at 4:53 AM on May 22, 2017
I have wavy fine hair (but a lot of it) and this is a big problem. I just happened upon Eva-NYC Soften Up Conditioner at Costco and it is a dream! I can comb right through my hair after the shower without hammering it with product.
posted by getawaysticks at 5:30 AM on May 22, 2017
posted by getawaysticks at 5:30 AM on May 22, 2017
I have very long, tangley hair, which I used to pretty much wear up constantly as it would become so knotty when it was down, and amazingly painful to brush.
The Tangle Teezer brush + silicone free hair care (I use Redken All Soft if I'm feeling flush, Aussie when I'm broke) has been LIFE CHANGING.
My hair hardly tangles at all now, and I really think it's the Tangle Teezer that's made the difference- I keep one in my bag at all times and can easily and painlessly brush out small knots before they get out of hand.
posted by Dwardles at 11:58 AM on May 22, 2017
The Tangle Teezer brush + silicone free hair care (I use Redken All Soft if I'm feeling flush, Aussie when I'm broke) has been LIFE CHANGING.
My hair hardly tangles at all now, and I really think it's the Tangle Teezer that's made the difference- I keep one in my bag at all times and can easily and painlessly brush out small knots before they get out of hand.
posted by Dwardles at 11:58 AM on May 22, 2017
My hair has become more like yours as time has gone by. For me, I think perimenopause has something to do with it.
One thing that helped me is putting more conditioner on than I think I need, and putting it on all over, not just the ends of hair.
I do use a product with dimethiconol, not dimethicone. (Davines's Oi Oil.) It's still not water soluble, but used sparingly, it doesn't build up as quickly or as badly as other silicones, and it helps make my hair more like how it used to be.
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 5:16 PM on May 22, 2017
One thing that helped me is putting more conditioner on than I think I need, and putting it on all over, not just the ends of hair.
I do use a product with dimethiconol, not dimethicone. (Davines's Oi Oil.) It's still not water soluble, but used sparingly, it doesn't build up as quickly or as badly as other silicones, and it helps make my hair more like how it used to be.
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 5:16 PM on May 22, 2017
Response by poster: Just to clear up some things:
* I pretty much exclusively use my Tangle Teezer on my hair. I have also just recently started using it in the shower to comb through conditioned hair under the water spray. I do seem to get quite a lot of hair coming out in the TT this way (even though I'm gentle and start from the bottom always); not sure if it's more than it would be if I used a wide-toothed comb or nothing. Is it more damaging to use a Tangle Teezer to detangle conditioned hair in the shower than a comb?
* I generally use a lot of conditioner, and condition my hair all the way through from almost roots to tips.
* I don't rub my hair dry but squeeze it gently in a towel.
* I have tried co-washing a bit, and would like to try more, but I tend to get an itchy scalp every so often, which needs anti-dandruff shampoo to clear it up. I'm not sure if the itchy scalp is because of conditioner on the scalp, because of lack of using any shampoo, or simply just a thing that would happen anyway every so often if I was using a non-medicated shampoo. I've never seen a silicone-free anti-dandruff conditioner.
* I have tried using coconut oil in my hair, a bit. My experience is that my hair just gets greasy. I don't think I'd like to leave it in my hair, although, who knows, it might help as a pre-shampoo treatment.
* I think my hair is wavy, but not curly.
* I very, very rarely use heat of any kind on my hair.
* I live in the UK, so a lot of these specific product recommendations may not help me that much :(
* I'm not entirely sure how I would follow the Curly Girl method of never combing or brushing my hair except in the shower. My hair tangles too much during the day for that and would just end up more matted if I couldn't detangle it! (Normally I Tangle-Teeze-brush it before and during a shower, at the least, but I know that leaving my hair a few days without brushing, between hair washes, makes it knottier.) Thoughts?
* Protective styles: I would like to use them more, but seeing as I have difficulty even braiding my hair, I'm not too sure what I could do.
posted by tangerine_poppies at 1:55 AM on May 23, 2017
* I pretty much exclusively use my Tangle Teezer on my hair. I have also just recently started using it in the shower to comb through conditioned hair under the water spray. I do seem to get quite a lot of hair coming out in the TT this way (even though I'm gentle and start from the bottom always); not sure if it's more than it would be if I used a wide-toothed comb or nothing. Is it more damaging to use a Tangle Teezer to detangle conditioned hair in the shower than a comb?
* I generally use a lot of conditioner, and condition my hair all the way through from almost roots to tips.
* I don't rub my hair dry but squeeze it gently in a towel.
* I have tried co-washing a bit, and would like to try more, but I tend to get an itchy scalp every so often, which needs anti-dandruff shampoo to clear it up. I'm not sure if the itchy scalp is because of conditioner on the scalp, because of lack of using any shampoo, or simply just a thing that would happen anyway every so often if I was using a non-medicated shampoo. I've never seen a silicone-free anti-dandruff conditioner.
* I have tried using coconut oil in my hair, a bit. My experience is that my hair just gets greasy. I don't think I'd like to leave it in my hair, although, who knows, it might help as a pre-shampoo treatment.
* I think my hair is wavy, but not curly.
* I very, very rarely use heat of any kind on my hair.
* I live in the UK, so a lot of these specific product recommendations may not help me that much :(
* I'm not entirely sure how I would follow the Curly Girl method of never combing or brushing my hair except in the shower. My hair tangles too much during the day for that and would just end up more matted if I couldn't detangle it! (Normally I Tangle-Teeze-brush it before and during a shower, at the least, but I know that leaving my hair a few days without brushing, between hair washes, makes it knottier.) Thoughts?
* Protective styles: I would like to use them more, but seeing as I have difficulty even braiding my hair, I'm not too sure what I could do.
posted by tangerine_poppies at 1:55 AM on May 23, 2017
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