Jump up and down, sensory craving toddlers...

August 10, 2015 3:06 PM

Looking for thoughts and advice on sensory seeking or sensory craving versions of sensory processing disorder in small children.

I think our 2.5 year old may have some tendencies in the sensory craving SPD type direction. I don't think it's a problem (yet at least) but I'm wondering if integrating some of the sensory diet activities might help him some. But I'm confused about how this works and the whole stimulating vs. calming balance.

Since he's my first I've mostly just assumed everything is normal, but watching his same aged (girl) cousin and his 1year old sister, I'm wondering if some of these things aren't quite normal:

• Seems to have a difficult time modulating the strength of his physical contact with others, hugs turn into headlocks/full body tackles very easily, it took him a long time to physically get "pet/pat" not "grab" with animals and people (close to 2yrs old I believe), cuddles often involved more head butts then I think may have been explainable by lack of coordination.
• Has a hard time with "stop". Sometimes it's defiance, which seems normal developmentally. But sometimes it looks to me like his body has a mind of it's own, and he just! can't! stop! This may also be normal, but his cousin is MUCH better at this.
• Seems to get hyper when overstimulated, ramping up his already active little self to what seems a little manic. Like trying to climb up me and stand on my head or aggressive wrestling or big jumping/falling down/throwing things. He has trouble calming down.
• Has, since about 4 months old, fought sleep like a black ops commando. Swaddling helped a lot for a long time (2ish). We bring him into our bed at night, and that works well once he's asleep, but if we try to lay down with him at bedtime (at his request) it seems to excite him rather than calm him.

Things that seem normal/I assume are normal: he's coordinated, a great climber, very verbal, only recently a picky eater, mildly concerned about tags but not really, fine with icky squishy textures, asks why all the time, can sit and focus on a story or a project.

I don't think we need a professional evaluation yet since the affects so far are fairly mild. But I feel like this could get much more difficult when he moves to full time preschool (which we are planning for when he is 3.5). He and his sister are currently with a Nanny during the work day, and he goes to preschool two mornings a week. They've said he does fine, but he almost never says a positive thing about it. I'm trying to educate myself in the meantime.

So, am I in the right ballpark? How do I help him get the right kinds of stimulation and help him calm down when it tips too far? Or am I overthinking behavior which is normal for active little boys?

posted by pennypiper to Health & Fitness (25 answers total)

Or am I overthinking behavior which is normal for active little boys?

It's sounds like it to me.
posted by amro at 3:24 PM on August 10, 2015 [10 favorites]

Me too. Both of my daughters were like this to varying degrees at that age. Some kids have more energy than others. All of that sounds like normal two year old stuff.
posted by xeney at 3:37 PM on August 10, 2015 [1 favorite]

3rding this sounds totally normal.
posted by rabbitrabbit at 3:44 PM on August 10, 2015 [1 favorite]

Best answer: Well, keep an eye on it. :) A sensory-heavy diet is a good thing - lots of physical movement!
posted by heathrowga at 3:52 PM on August 10, 2015

You have described a normal child. Enjoy!
posted by sacrifix at 4:20 PM on August 10, 2015 [2 favorites]

I have a video of my son at 1, his first birthday party. His female cousin was very aggressive, taking his new toys, banging on things, etc. She was a little older. He just sort of placidly moved onto the next thing, and it is fascinating watching it now, how she grabbed and he was like, meh, okay.

Then when he was 2 1/2, he did get a little violent. Tried to teach him some stuff on the computer some games, and he was pounding the heck out of my keyboard, so that was obviously not a good idea.

The only thing that calmed him down was music. Bath time every night, including long talks, then after getting out, singing songs while wrapped up in the bath towel. Big fight to get the diaper on, then stories. So many stories.

Then music. He had Raffi tapes, and the California Grapes, so after 2-3 stories, we could put on his music and he would lie in bed. Until the tape needed to be turned over. "More music!" was a constant refrain, and this went on for a long time.

He didn't really get into a mature little adult until he was 3 1/2 or 4, and even then, it could erupt into a tantrum. He really was a little monkey. Wanting to jump on my bed at night, etc. "I'm the King of the World!" in his undies and blankey wrapped around his shoulders. That was because his older sister had begged me to buy Titanic, which she promptly forgot about and he wanted to watch every single night (a 3 hour movie). Heck, when she was 9, she kick-boxed his blowup Rock-em-Sock-Em ball into the light fixture and it was the perfect kick, that is, it released a spray of glass shards all over his room, including his rug, in the cars and roads pattern. Then it was nightmares about lights after that :::sigh:::

I think you should keep on with the consistency of teaching him to be gentle, giving him lots of activities in the day time, and then a relaxing bath and bedtime story routine at night. It takes a lot of time, it's a 24-hour-a-day job, really. If he's not acting up at daycare, I wouldn't worry for now. All kids have a unique personality, and some are more exhausting than others. Want to see my grey hairs?
posted by Marie Mon Dieu at 4:22 PM on August 10, 2015

Best answer: Keep in mind if you do end up wanting a professional evaluation, this process can be months in the making before you even get to the treatment options. Those months are a long time for a child at this age. It's worth talking over your concerns with your pediatrician.
posted by JenMarie at 4:25 PM on August 10, 2015 [1 favorite]

Response by poster: Ha! Okay, that's awesome, thanks all :) I don't have a lot of comparison material so it's good to hear that this doesn't strike folks as unusual. I'm definitely going to add some new sensory activities (the more the better), mention the wildness to his ped, and keep an eye out, but this reassures me that I'm not missing something that would be obvious to an unbiased observer.
posted by pennypiper at 4:32 PM on August 10, 2015

My daughter, when she was that age, needed constant external stimulation. This reads so familiar, right down to the refusing sleep and insisting I lay with her at bedtime while she fought going to bed. She's now a happy, healthy teenager who prefers to hide out in her room, as teenagers do.
posted by Ruki at 4:48 PM on August 10, 2015

Best answer: It sounds pretty normal, but I think you should talk to his pediatrician and ask about an "Early Intervention" evaluation if you're in the US. You can also simply self-refer to the local EI program. These evaluations are free and provided through your local school district via a battery of early childhood development specialists who will play with your toddler for a couple hours and then let you know what you're dealing with. If it's nothing, your kid will have spent a couple hours playing novel games with grown-ups giving him ALL THE ATTENTION. If it is sensory-seeking, the earlier you can get interventions going, the better. (And in many/most cases these will also be free, through your local district.)

Some of these are similar to things that tipped me off to my own sensory-processing-problem-having child ... but it's a hard thing to diagnose. It doesn't hurt to talk to experts, get some feedback, and have an idea what to keep an eye on.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 5:02 PM on August 10, 2015 [4 favorites]

Best answer: I have two boys and my second was/is much more like you describe, and is super verbal. I talked myself out of worrying...and as it turned out he was growing cataracts and got to where he was seriously not seeing! I now think he was seeking input.

We enjoy lots of sensory diet stuff anyway. None of us, me included, can stand tags. So I don't think it would hurt. But --

Moral of the story: if you're worried, get your pediatrician involved for a workup.
posted by warriorqueen at 5:18 PM on August 10, 2015

Response by poster: Oh, one other thing (which probably doesn't matter) but I meant to mention is that even as a baby he was in pretty constant motion. You know how normally when you hold a child (once they can hold themselves up) on your hip and they kind of hook on and help support themselves? He didn't do this till he was very old (again, I think 2 ish?) and he was always moving and wiggling. I jokingly called him our baby shake weight. And even now when being held in the hip position he is wiggly and only weakly assists.
posted by pennypiper at 5:51 PM on August 10, 2015

He sounds like a typical boy. Talk to your nanny about adding more outside time for him. Boys that age need to run themselves out. It can take hours. I wouldn't worry about assessing him for anything, he really sounds fine. If anything, I would look for a male nanny who is very much into sports.
posted by myselfasme at 6:11 PM on August 10, 2015

Best answer: It's hard because toddlers are so weird that basically everything mildly concerning is in the range of normal. Our son was diagnosed at 4 with a sensory processing disorder, but until then we heard lots of, "lots of toddlers freak out at loud noises", "some kids are just cautious on the playground". It wasn't until he transitioned from the daycare he'd been at his whole life to preschool that shit got real and it was clear we needed professional help. I have a couple of past Asks about this that may be helpful. For us it wasn't anything subtle, it was wild meltdowns multiple times a day.

But the great news is, six months of occupational therapy later, he has made SO MUCH PROGRESS. He can bathe, play on the playground, climb things. His balance has improved, his confidence has improved. This from a kid who couldn't tolerate the ball pit when he started. He still doesn't like sticky fingers but he can complete an activity with shaving cream if you motivate him. Meltdowns are the exception rather than the rule.

So, if you're worried, get an evaluation now. On balance, earlier is better than later. But even if you don't have him evaluated now and decide you need it later, it's not like you're missing a critical window that will doom your kid. There's no way to say for now whether your kid will outgrow his quirks (though your update is a touch concerning) and it might be a bit before anyone can tell. But even if that's the case, you'll still be ok.
posted by telepanda at 7:01 PM on August 10, 2015 [2 favorites]

Best answer: I don't think we need a professional evaluation yet since the affects so far are fairly mild.

Reconsider this if there is a birth to 3 program in your area - most of them are totally free, and such an evaluation poses no obligation on your part. I can't speak to whether your kid sounds like he needs help, but my daughter has received services since six months old (including for sensory issues) and I am so, so happy with the assistance we have received. Getting a free professional evaluation while your son is young enough can either put your mind at ease or get him some help coping if he is in fact having trouble (or just give you some great skills for dealing with a high-energy boy).
posted by peanut_mcgillicuty at 7:26 PM on August 10, 2015 [1 favorite]

Best answer: As a parent of a kid with SPD, it sounds like you're more in the range of normal, but you really ought to get the kid evaluated, even if to rule it out. Yes it takes months, and yes it's a hassle, but if the kid does have sensory processing problems, you can get acces to much better care. A misdiagnosis of our son at that age has set him back two years of treatment.

Again, probably fine, but you should probably get him checked if you have worries. Most pediatricians aren't aware of SPD issues, and rarely catch them without parental advocacy.
posted by furnace.heart at 7:41 PM on August 10, 2015 [2 favorites]

Realize that all kids are pretty sensitive, and my 2 year old knows that pulling her 4 year old sister's hair gets lots of attention fast.
posted by nickggully at 7:44 PM on August 10, 2015

Best answer: peanut_mcgillicuty: "Reconsider this if there is a birth to 3 program in your area - most of them are totally free, and such an evaluation poses no obligation on your part."

For future readers, if you are in the United States, this is totally free and federally funded, through IDEA. Contact your local school district and ask for Early Intervention. If the secretary seems confused, ask for special ed. EVERY CHILD is entitled to an Early Intervention screening -- and in some areas, school districts are pushing to have every child evaluated at age 2, whether there are signs of delay or not. Intervening early, especially with speech and language delays (which are the most common delays), results in really good results. (Most speech and language delays, caught before age 5, can be fully ameliorated by age 7 to 10.) Early identification and intervention results in better outcomes for the identified children, and saves money for taxpayers who will be paying for education and medical treatment later. Don't put off getting an Early Intervention evaluation because you don't feel like you "need" it or it seems too expensive for a minor problem -- it saves substantial money in the long run.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 7:52 PM on August 10, 2015 [3 favorites]

To add: I was talking to a friend of mine who was a pediatrician today, and she said, "I was SO MAD when we wet to EI and they said [her kid] was weak on his right side, because WHY HADN'T I NOTICED?" But it's so hard to notice these things with your own kid! You see them every day and you adjust! Even pediatricians miss signals! And now her son's had 18 months of therapy and his right side is caught up with his left.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 7:55 PM on August 10, 2015

Best answer: Your bullet points are an exact description of my son at that age, down to the hugging problem (have you taught him "bear hugs" vs "bunny hugs" yet?). So hey, I have to point out that my son who was just like that has autism, which wasn't diagnosed until much later.

If I could send a letter back to myself when he was that age, I would get him evaluated by a good physical therapist (the kind who does Floortime) and the school district's early intervention team and have someone who isn't from the school district do the ADOS test.
posted by The corpse in the library at 8:45 PM on August 10, 2015 [1 favorite]

Best answer: I work in Early Intervention (EI) and wanted to point out that the new edition of The Sensory Profile, which is the best tool right now for identifying processing differences, has standard scores. This means some states will allow the Sensory Profile to qualify kids for EI services (instead of, for example, a language or other delay). It's not standard protocol yet for an initial evaluation, so ask specifically about it when you call your local EI agency.
posted by Ideal Impulse at 9:00 PM on August 10, 2015

Best answer: I am nthing the recommendation to seek out some sort of evaluation. Your note about headlocks and headbutts is very key and quite specifically like our daughter. Improper modulation of strength is a key symptom of sensory seeking behavior. People who don't have experience with SPD might gloss over that detail, but it stands out to me because I have lived through it.

Our daughter has SPD and is a sensory seeker. The descriptions you gave are very similar to lots of things we went through and, no, it's not quite like ordinary active children behavior. Yes, our daughter can climb like a mountain goat (I've caught her literally 20 feet high in a pine tree at age 4) and is super strong and those things are great! BUT, SPD children are also often emotionally volatile and volcanic, especially sensation seekers, which can cause lots of heartache as they get older. There are other threads on AskMe about this which can give greater detail. SPD is highly treatable and we have noticed significant improvements when our daughter has courses of therapy.

A sensory processing evaluation is non-intrusive and doesn't hurt the child at all. Our daughter had one from each of her therapists and both times the therapist lead her through activity and coordination exercises to see how her senses (primarily visual, aural and vestibular) were functioning. The therapies themselves are non-intrusive, as well, and involved structured activities to stimulate and then soothe the child's sensory system. Your child may not have SPD (no one can diagnose him one way or another through this post), but it is worth checking out in my opinion.
posted by Slothrop at 7:05 AM on August 11, 2015 [2 favorites]

Based on all of your written descriptions, he sounds like almost every active kid I know. Some kids are really chill and some kids are just very active, even as tiny babies.

Question: have you done any actual sleep training? Swaddling until two and now just bringing him into your bed are fine if they work, but it can also create this insanely frustrating cyclical situation where he can't fall asleep without those things.
posted by barnone at 7:14 AM on August 11, 2015

Best answer: I sent you a meMail, with a lot more details, but for you and future parents on the fence, I'd like to recommend reading through Sensational Kids: Hope and Help for Children with Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD). That was the book that really crystallized for me that we were dealing with something outside the realm of normal. I read the sections about the hyperresponsive child, and my heart just sank.

The book describes underresponsive, hyperresponsive, and sensory seeking children and will help you get an overview of the different ways SPD can present, and ways in which kids can mix up features of the different types. And the motor components of each type, which are hard to assess if you don't know much about it. (e.g. my kid is vestibular over-responsive and proprioception under-responsive, which means his brain freaks out at unexpected movement but his body isn't very good at correcting for it.)

I'd like to loudly second Slothrop about SPD kids frequently being emotionally volatile and volcanic and if you see this developing over time (or persisting past toddlerhood), definitely seek help, because that really affects your and the kid's quality of life.
posted by telepanda at 7:26 AM on August 11, 2015

Response by poster: I'm reading the Sensational Kids book and have made a ped appt. My gut is telling me that there's something going on that is making life more difficult for him than it needs to be, so I'm going to listen to it and to the wonderful folks here who have shared their experiences. Thank you all.
posted by pennypiper at 8:40 AM on August 12, 2015 [3 favorites]