Ice breakers for (queer male) group sex party

November 5, 2013 2:48 PM

A friend and I are throwing our first (queer male) group sexytime party. We are looking for some fun getting-to-know-you activities as most of the participants have not met before.

This first act of the party should not be rushed; no games that would escalate too quickly to sexytimes please.

Goals: playful, fun;
anti-goals: coercive or scary

posted by khedron to Human Relations (6 answers total)

Best answer: 2 truths and a lie. It lets people show off a particular side of their personality, gives good topics of conversation for later, and lets people get a little dirty ("I've never done __(sex act here)__"), without it leading directly to any sexytimes.
posted by hasna at 3:05 PM on November 5, 2013 [6 favorites]

From experience with non-sexytime groups, anyway, Two Truths and a Lie can start out pretty tame and then get rather racy, but doesn't lead to anybody getting pushed into stuff the way that Truth or Dare does. (And, on preview, I guess it wasn't just me who thought of it.) I Never/Never Have I Ever is similar but I admit I've always seen it done as a drinking game--you could probably just have people gain points for everything they haven't done or something if you want to keep people a bit more sober.
posted by Sequence at 3:08 PM on November 5, 2013

Apples to Apples, or its racier older sibling, Cards Against Humanity.
posted by needs more cowbell at 3:17 PM on November 5, 2013

Best answer: Catchphrase Electronic Version - completely tame but a good ice breaker to get people laughing at parties
Karaoke (with no badgering of people who don't want to sing)
Loaded Questions Adult Version
Adult Pictionary (make your own cards ahead of time)
Never Have I Ever
Spin the Bottle
Twister (with or without reduced clothing)
Truth or Dare Jenga (make a custom set with your own Truths and Dares that people have to do when they pull a piece out - there's commercial versions but by making your own you can control the level of naughtiness)
Some form of naughty dice (for once things get naughtier)

Bonus tip - have a safe place for people to leave their phones when they come in so that they're not tempted to be shy and hide by staring into their device. The lack of cameras can also help put people at ease.
posted by Candleman at 4:18 PM on November 5, 2013 [2 favorites]

Best answer: What about strip poker? The variant would be the winner of the hand has to remove an item of clothing. This accomplishes a few things:

- A social component, where conversation is had around the table during the game.
- A relatively slow transition from socializing to sexytimes; make it even slower or more enjoyable by pausing the game after each hand so the winner can perform a small dance or strip tease while taking off their desired item.
- An 'out' for those who aren't quite comfortable with the speed things are going. If someone's not comfortable taking off their shirt yet, they can just keep folding until they're ready.
posted by SquidLips at 8:17 AM on November 6, 2013 [2 favorites]

Best answer: My favorite party ice breaker:

The Rubber Band Game: You pick a word for the night that no one can say. (It has to be a common word like "Make."

Each person gets, say, three rubber bands upon entering the party and the instruction that for the next X number of hours, they can't use the word "Make" at all. If someone uses the word, they have to give away a rubber band. The person with the most rubber bands at the end of the game wins ... something.

So, you start a conversation with someone and say, "So, what do you do for a living?" and the person says, "I make furniture." Person B loses a rubber band. I thought it was fun. Maybe I'm boring? I don't know. Try it.
posted by nubianinthedesert at 11:25 AM on November 6, 2013 [2 favorites]