Help me help the top 1%!
October 15, 2011 9:58 AM Subscribe
For a protest/event/action later today I need sarcastic slogans, chants, and lines about tough the rich have it, and how they can't afford to pay more taxes.
This afternoon, I'm performing as a carnival-barker style emcee for a "Tailgate to Help Struggling Millionaires." We're hoping to raise awareness for how tough the top 1% of income earners have it, and how the lower 99% need to step up and help them.
Yes, we're attempting to be ironic and sarcastic. We're hoping to poke fun at the fact that the most corporations, millionaires and billionaires aren't paying their fair share in taxes, and we should adjust corporate and personal income taxes to raise revenues.
To set the scene, this event will take place in a large parking lot outside a sporting event. I'll have a small PA to speak through. I'll be standing in front of booth with a tip jar, where people can make donations to ease the tax burden on the rich. We'll have a "free hot dog with a 5¢ donation to rich people" booth. I'll have a foil to act off of - a fellow actor will be dressed up as a millionaire (with top hat and monocle). We'll have a petition that people can sign up to support the American Jobs Act and/or state and local job creation/tax fairness issues.
What I need are your chants, slogans, and ideas for ways that I can engage the audience as they pass by on their way to the hockey game, raise awareness about tax inequity, and poke fun at the 1%ers.
I'm thinking along the lines of:
I'm not looking to debate tax policy in this thread. Thank you!
This afternoon, I'm performing as a carnival-barker style emcee for a "Tailgate to Help Struggling Millionaires." We're hoping to raise awareness for how tough the top 1% of income earners have it, and how the lower 99% need to step up and help them.
Yes, we're attempting to be ironic and sarcastic. We're hoping to poke fun at the fact that the most corporations, millionaires and billionaires aren't paying their fair share in taxes, and we should adjust corporate and personal income taxes to raise revenues.
To set the scene, this event will take place in a large parking lot outside a sporting event. I'll have a small PA to speak through. I'll be standing in front of booth with a tip jar, where people can make donations to ease the tax burden on the rich. We'll have a "free hot dog with a 5¢ donation to rich people" booth. I'll have a foil to act off of - a fellow actor will be dressed up as a millionaire (with top hat and monocle). We'll have a petition that people can sign up to support the American Jobs Act and/or state and local job creation/tax fairness issues.
What I need are your chants, slogans, and ideas for ways that I can engage the audience as they pass by on their way to the hockey game, raise awareness about tax inequity, and poke fun at the 1%ers.
I'm thinking along the lines of:
- Won't you please think of these struggling millionaires?
- How are millionaires supposed to afford second, third, and fourth homes if we tax them fairly?
- Can't you pick up a little more of the burden, so the rich won't have to suffer?
I'm not looking to debate tax policy in this thread. Thank you!
Invite people to sponsor a rich person, promising that their money will go towards Ferraris and Mansions, to ensure that Tarquil never has to suffer the indignity of being poor. In return, Tarquil will write a letter to you once a quarter telling you about all of his lovely possessions.
A play on this kind of thing.
posted by dougrayrankin at 10:15 AM on October 15, 2011 [3 favorites]
A play on this kind of thing.
posted by dougrayrankin at 10:15 AM on October 15, 2011 [3 favorites]
How about a bit on how the yacht market has totally tanked.
posted by mikeand1 at 10:19 AM on October 15, 2011
posted by mikeand1 at 10:19 AM on October 15, 2011
Won't somebody think of the trophy wives?
My children have to make their own sundaes. I AM THE ONE PERCENT!
Help us create jobs in China!
posted by PlusDistance at 10:27 AM on October 15, 2011
My children have to make their own sundaes. I AM THE ONE PERCENT!
Help us create jobs in China!
posted by PlusDistance at 10:27 AM on October 15, 2011
- Have a "yachts for tots" drive.
- Complain that senators can't be bought as cheaply as they used to.
- "You don't seriously expect me to send my child to the Waldorf school do you? She needs private tutors. And a private jet."
posted by adamrice at 10:34 AM on October 15, 2011 [1 favorite]
- Complain that senators can't be bought as cheaply as they used to.
- "You don't seriously expect me to send my child to the Waldorf school do you? She needs private tutors. And a private jet."
posted by adamrice at 10:34 AM on October 15, 2011 [1 favorite]
Think of the children! They might have to go to PUBLIC school! They might have to go to STATE university! We might have to fire the cook and make the nanny do the kitchen work!
posted by TooFewShoes at 11:24 AM on October 15, 2011
posted by TooFewShoes at 11:24 AM on October 15, 2011
Response by poster: These are great suggestions! Keep 'em coming, gang!
posted by elmer benson at 12:39 PM on October 15, 2011
posted by elmer benson at 12:39 PM on October 15, 2011
There might be something relevant in the Everything is OK youtube videos.
posted by qxntpqbbbqxl at 1:52 PM on October 15, 2011
posted by qxntpqbbbqxl at 1:52 PM on October 15, 2011
Perhaps you could draw some inspiration from this (sadly, unironic) NYT article.
posted by en forme de poire at 2:43 PM on October 15, 2011
posted by en forme de poire at 2:43 PM on October 15, 2011
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by dougrayrankin at 10:11 AM on October 15, 2011 [4 favorites]