Does growing up with or without cats really affect how people feel about them as an adult as much as I think it does?
August 23, 2011 5:15 PM   Subscribe

Do most people who grow up without cats hate them? Is it at all common for people who grow up with cats to then hate them as adults?

Whenever anybody tells me they hate cats, I ask if they ever had a cat growing up. From what I can recall, it seems like they all respond that they did not. Additionally, I haven't encountered anyone who's grown up with cats, who has said they hate them. I'm drawing conclusions and I'm wondering if this is a confirmation bias on my part.

What has been your experience? Is it more likely for people who grow up without cats to hate them as adults? Also, is it common at all for people who grow up with cats to then hate them as adults?
posted by smirkyfodder to Pets & Animals (83 answers total) 5 users marked this as a favorite
 
Additionally, I haven't encountered anyone who's grown up with cats, who has said they hate them.

I hate cats because I'm allergic. Growing up many of my friends and family had cats.
posted by 2bucksplus at 5:17 PM on August 23, 2011 [1 favorite]


Response by poster: I should have been more clear, I think. When I say "grow up with cats," I mean they were your family's pet and they were in your home. Thanks!
posted by smirkyfodder at 5:20 PM on August 23, 2011


One thing you might consider: cats speak a different language from humans. If you're not familiar with cat behavior, then they will be little furballs of psychological mystery with very sharp pointy ends. Many people who don't own cats don't understand things like, say, a wagging tail is a sign of displeasure and eye-contact is threatening. It's easy to hate what you don't understand.

That said, I grew up without cats and I love them. Took me a while to listen to what my cat's tail was telling me, though.
posted by meese at 5:23 PM on August 23, 2011 [2 favorites]


It seems to correlate in my recollection. But I think it's more of a basic cat person / dog person thing. Some of the humans just don't like non-pack animals.
posted by gjc at 5:23 PM on August 23, 2011


We had cats for most of my childhood, but I like cats on an individual basis. My 2 cats (sadly back at my parents now), I absolutely adore, even though one is on the bitchy side and the other is the most loving cat on earth.

I generally don't like other people's cats all that much, although I consider myself a cat person. My roommate has three cats, and one of them I HATE (but only because she was nasty to my cat when I moved in and my kitty had to go back to my parents'). The other two are kittens and they're pretty cute.

On the other hand, my family never had a dog and I actually kind of hated dogs growing up. They would always stick their noses in unfortunate places. I don't feel so strongly against them now, but I don't feel at ease around dogs for an extended period of time, whereas I'm pretty much always happy around cats.
posted by DoubleLune at 5:26 PM on August 23, 2011 [1 favorite]


don't think so -- I grew up with a fish and a dog, and I like cats just fine.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 5:26 PM on August 23, 2011


By saying I don't like other people's cats -- it's more that I have to get used to them. This can take a few minutes or never.
posted by DoubleLune at 5:26 PM on August 23, 2011 [1 favorite]


I had outdoor cats when I lived on a farm as a kid. I loved them.
As an adult, I went to someone's house whom had an indoor cat and all the furniture had a faint cat-fur-oil smell. Haven't been a fan of the critters ever since.
posted by Neekee at 5:28 PM on August 23, 2011 [1 favorite]


Perhaps your logic is backwards. Often pets are bought due to pressure from children. People who didn't have cats growing up probably didn't have them because they didn't want them to begin with.
posted by smithsmith at 5:28 PM on August 23, 2011 [7 favorites]


My father hates cats, although he grew up with a family cat. I grew up with dogs, I'm allergic to cats, and I have a dog. However, I have always liked cats, and have recently quite happily been adopted by the cat my neighbor moved off and left.

He gets to go to the vet for his very special surgery next week, and from there he will move to my new place with me.
posted by dilettante at 5:28 PM on August 23, 2011 [1 favorite]


Until the age of four, I lived with a cat that used to sink its claws into my exposed legs when I sat down to eat breakfast. Not much of a cat person, me. Don't like dogs much, either.
posted by Nomyte at 5:29 PM on August 23, 2011


I didn't grow up with cats, but I love them. For some reason I 'get' them. Probably because I'm not a 'pack animal' type of person.
posted by evening at 5:32 PM on August 23, 2011


Yeah, I definitely know people who grew up with cats and as a result have chosen never to own cats themselves. In most cases, these people tend to have some fond memories of the cats they grew up with, but memories of the bad parts of cat ownership (e.g., older cats becoming ill and pissing blood on furniture that they couldn't afford to replace, cantankerous cats repeatedly refusing to come inside) have outweighed the good ones.
posted by limeonaire at 5:32 PM on August 23, 2011


We didn't get a cat until I was 13 or 14. I have never hated cats. My mom never had a cat, until we got one, and she didn't hate them either.
posted by rtha at 5:33 PM on August 23, 2011 [1 favorite]


I grew up with cats and do not like cats. I also grew up with dogs and am very much a dog person.
posted by DarlingBri at 5:34 PM on August 23, 2011


Never had cats growing up, love 'em now, think this question is pretty far out on the polling-the-audience continuum.
posted by box at 5:36 PM on August 23, 2011


I'm allergic and grew up without a cat. Throughout my adult life, I figured cats were generally unresponsive creatures that avoided people. Through happenstance, we happened to get a cat, and I learned that once a cat warms up to you, they can be goofy and fun. I don't think I would have found out otherwise, though.
posted by ignignokt at 5:36 PM on August 23, 2011


Grew up without cats (except for a kitten for 2 months when I was about 16), because my mom feared all things that moved which were not human or mechanical (we're also both allergic) and I love kittens and like most cats.
posted by elizardbits at 5:37 PM on August 23, 2011


I grew up without cats, until I started feeding one and eventually my parents folded and let me keep it.

Some people just like cats.
posted by sien at 5:39 PM on August 23, 2011


The very first family pet that I can remember was an orange tabby named Cinnamon. She was a little wretch clawing all the furniture, and then, when done with that, me (who was all of three years old at the time.) Somewhere between then and now I became quite allergic to some cats, but not others, so I always have to be on my guard. It's weird... I most certainly do not hate cats as a whole, but I definitely DO hate certain individual cats, more so than dogs. Some of the cat horror stories I've read here on Metafilter have - very rarely - evoked extreme irritation at the cat in question AND the people who respond by just dismissing the behavior by saying, "Cats are weird. But OMG!!! Nom, nom, nom, so CUUUTE!" That said, I'm much more apt to look for "people" traits in cat personalities and then decide whether or not I like them on an individual basis (which is probably mistake #1) based on how friendly they are, if they have your back, if they don't shit/piss on you and your things, etc... I would love to own a friendly cat if I could be certain I wasn't allergic to it (which sadly, I can't.)

I'm quite fond of dogs, too - except the really stupid and/or mean ones.
posted by Rewind at 5:40 PM on August 23, 2011


I grew up with a cat and am allergic to cats. I secretly like cats but often profess to hate their affected natures. I'd probably have one if I wasn't allergic cos they're so cuddly, but I'm much more of a dog person.
posted by geegollygosh at 5:40 PM on August 23, 2011


My father did not like cats. My mother liked dogs and kind of liked cats, but preferred dogs. I love cats and dogs. I grew up with both cats and dogs.
posted by fifilaru at 5:40 PM on August 23, 2011


I grew up with a dog. I love cats now and have had several despite the fact that I'm allergic. Cats SMELL GOOD. Despite the chicken liver breath, I love the smell of their clean fur.
posted by Morrigan at 5:41 PM on August 23, 2011 [3 favorites]


My mom didn't like cats and neither do I, we had one dog growing up but we weren't really a dog-centric household either. Married a guy with a cat. Both he and the cat were non-pack-animal types. The cat was (is) disgusting. Not the cat's fault, as the ex is not much of a caretaker so it's an outside cat, gets fleas, brings rodents in as gifts, and once had a string of tapeworms coming out of its anus ... which ... it ... then ... ATE. Cats are GROSS.

My dear old pound-puppy mutt lays her head on my lap and looks up at me with the sweetest almost-black eyes, so beautiful and empathetic. My son suffers from tremendous anxiety and that dog is his greatest solace, all he needs to do is touch her soft floppy ear for a minute or two, and she just makes him calm without even trying.
posted by headnsouth at 5:47 PM on August 23, 2011 [1 favorite]


I grew up with no pets at all. I got a cat as an adult. I turned out to be very allergic, but it's controllable with careful grooming and daily medication and I have never seen any sign of mice in my home since getting a cat (and a cat for that cat) so I will never not have cats, and will simply live with a runny nose and big bags under my eyes. I didn't grow up with mice and don't care to find out whether I like them now as an adult or not.
posted by padraigin at 5:47 PM on August 23, 2011


I think that most people who hate cats grew up without them, but that is much different than the idea that most people who grow up without cats hate them.
posted by queensissy at 5:50 PM on August 23, 2011 [1 favorite]


I grew up with cats. I do not now hate cats, but I am not at all a cat person and I will likely never get another cat.

My first best friend was an orange striped cat named Caramel. I wrote books about him for Young Authors. He was one of the greatest animals I ever met. He was considered unadoptable at the LA County shelter because he was not very bright (due to a prolonged illness that left him developmentally disabled).

After he "ran away" when we got evicted, my parents got a series of cats -- some fine, some nasty, many unneutered. Every time the mama cat had kitttens, I had to stand on the side of the street with a sign that said, "Free Kittens." This was, of course, humiliating and icky (because seriously, just fix your cats, seriously). At one point we had three litters of kittens in the house, many of them sired by an older brother cat. Did I mention my mom was allergic? Yeah. She realized, with all these cats in the house, that she was allergic. Then one day, my mom said enough with the cats, didn't want to pay the SPCA dump fee and demanded I take all of the cats out somewhere and "get rid of them." Instead of drowning them or something, I drove them to a forest preserve that was the closest to a no-kill shelter and left them there, 12 or so of them, crying and snotting and apologizing to them. When I got home without any cats, really broken up and self hating, my mom handed me $100. I think that's the worst I've ever felt about myself and my life (and heck, I've named cigarettes for Philip Morris and had a messy divorce, so that's saying something). I donate far too much to the SPCA out of guilt.

I got a cat years later as an adult. He was not too bright, like Caramel. He was a purebred reject Sphynx, all hairless. I totally loved him. My ex hated him. When I got pregnant, my ex made me choose between the baby and the cat. I found a good home for Ralph (the cat), pampered with a single lady doctor with a huge house in the way-out suburbs. But I still cried the entire time, it still felt like abandoning him and I'm still mad and sad and guilty about it. I haven't owned a cat since.

I got my first dog six years ago. I love her. She is very different than a cat. She is not very bright. The first time she saw a mouse, she ran and hid.

My daughter wants a cat. I tell her cats are awesome and she can get one when she lives on her own. But honestly, I'm never, ever, ever going to be a cat person again on the tiny chance I'd have to get rid of him or her.

All that to say, I suspect people who grew up with cat hoarding or nasty cats that belonged to someone else in the family or parents who had a thing about their cats one way or the other might not be cat people as the turn into adults.
posted by Gucky at 5:52 PM on August 23, 2011 [13 favorites]


My dad was a voluble and aggressive cat-hater and he tried to get our dogs to go after cats. He had a number of other, um, "issues" as well. I was indifferent to cats until I started dating a woman who had a mom cat + new kittens who were very charming. After that, cat liker.

Then my sister found a few-day-old kitten and nursed it for a long time until it was a grown-up cat. I loved that cat, and since then I am very much a cat person.
posted by jet_silver at 5:53 PM on August 23, 2011


We had both a cat and a dog while I was growing up.

I would not say that I hate cats, but I do not understand why anyone would actively choose to spend time with one, let alone welcome one into their home.

Our cat was not unusually awful -- I remember no clawing of furniture, I have no scratch scars. He was just a normal cat, i.e. aloof and disdainful. The dog was an obnoxiously smelly beagle who would run away at the slightest provocation, such that many of my childhood afternoons were spent riding my bike around the neighborhood hopelessly calling out the idiotic name my sister gave the dog.

Despite that, I then and now prefer dogs. I now own a dog. He is awesome. (He is, obviously, not a beagle.)
posted by ook at 5:54 PM on August 23, 2011


I don't like cats in general because I don't like being clawed. And I have been clawed by cats for doing nothing but sitting down. I also don't like the way they smell.

That said, I don't mind my in-laws' cats or my friends' various cats,or the super friendly cat who hangs out by the museum in my town.

My husband grew up with cats and loves them. He'd like to have a cat some day. He can get a cat when I can get a dog. In the meantime, we have some awesome rabbits we absolutely adore.
posted by zizzle at 5:57 PM on August 23, 2011


I grew up with cats. I hate them.
posted by humboldt32 at 5:59 PM on August 23, 2011 [5 favorites]


I had a cat growing up. I still love cats, but I don't particularly want one. Houses are better when they aren't covered in fur and don't reek of old pee.
posted by Sys Rq at 6:02 PM on August 23, 2011


I had many cats growing up. I always got to name the cats, so I guess they were "my" cats.

Maybe I hate cats. Well, I mean, cats are cute, and who can blame them for taking advantage of it if someone is going to feed them, but -- they're like the Japanese pop-culture of pets, to me. All this endless wankery over something so inauthentic, just eeshh how could you care as much as you do about that -- it's as though you totally embrace the pointlessness of existence and aren't even fooling yourself that you are simply making up stuff to pretend-care about while waiting for mating and then death. You, like, think your cat has opinions about things you do? A cat is a fur-covered shark. It thinks about food.

Why wouldn't you want a proper pet, that is, a dog?
posted by pH Indicating Socks at 6:02 PM on August 23, 2011 [6 favorites]


I grew up without pets, and while I don't usually HATE them I just don't get them. Cats seem kinda dangerous, and whenever I'm over someone's house who has a cat they inevitably scratch me.
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 6:03 PM on August 23, 2011


We were a dog house growing up, although I think for the rest of my family having a dog might have been a lot like having a couch. Just something one has. I really loved animals and still do, and we have a dog and a cat both in our house, who also really like each other a lot. We all like eating and sitting around on the couch so we have that in common.

We just like having animals around, I guess. I didn't grow up that way. I am the only family member who actively likes cats. But the number of ways that my adult incarnation is different from my background is seems pretty substantial to me. But I don't know if what 'seems pretty substantial' is normal generational patterns due to changing culture.

Anyway, in answer to your question, my data point would be 'no' with the caveat that maybe you should throw out my data point.
posted by A Terrible Llama at 6:07 PM on August 23, 2011


I grew up with a rotating set of animals, including a cat (there were also rats and chickens and fish and hamsters, but not all at the same time), and I hate animals. Especially mammals -- the chickens and my friends' lizards are okay, but I hate mammalian pets. I hated them when I was little, too, and we had them, despite my parents trying to get me to like them. Just for, you know, anecdote.
posted by brainmouse at 6:11 PM on August 23, 2011


I grew up with cats and dogs, and as an adult I'm the crazy animal lady. The only people I know who really dislike cats, as opposed to just being meh about them, all grew up without cats. However, as the aforementioned crazy animal lady, I don't really hang out with too many folks who don't like animals.
posted by crankylex at 6:20 PM on August 23, 2011


I don't trust anyone who says they hate cats or dogs. I understand people have allergies, but that isn't the cat or dog's fault. So what if someone had one or two bad experiences with them. It's like someone saying they hate women or men because they had a bad relationship with one. Cats (or dogs) each have unique personalities and all of them cannot be put in one category. Broad stroke painters are people to be weary of in my book.

But to answer your question, in my experience, the only people who I have encountered that have hated cats are people that have never owned one.
posted by MaryDellamorte at 6:25 PM on August 23, 2011 [3 favorites]


My dad has a theory (that he freely admits is based on nothing) that toxoplasmosis affects people in the same way as it does mice and rats- by making them fond of cats. So people who were exposed to cats would be more likely to like them. No clue if it's true but I kind of like the idea.
posted by showbiz_liz at 6:31 PM on August 23, 2011 [4 favorites]


I've thought about this before. I found no correlation.
What I have seen is that, if a person didn't like (or even hated) cats as child, they also didn't like them as adults. If they did like cats as children, they also liked them as adults.

From what I have noticed, it doesn't matter if it's big families, small families; with cats, or no cats. In the same family, you will see some children clearly dislike cats, and the other sibling will adore cats, and it stays like that even when they're adults.

Hope this helps :-)
posted by midnightmoonlight at 6:33 PM on August 23, 2011


To reiterate something said above, if you don't grow up with animals they're these alien, uncontrollable, possibly dangerous THING that live in someones house and come equipped with natural weapons, and you have no idea if that dog or cat loves you or if it wants to bite you (or it loves you by biting).
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 6:34 PM on August 23, 2011


Yes, that's exactly it--the people I've known who don't like cats actually have never spent much time around them, so they're nervous around them. They don't know what cat body language means, they don't know how to treat cats, and they don't know how the cat will react to what they do. This often leads to getting scratched or something, then they decide they hate cats.

I had a friend over once who hadn't grown up with cats and had little experience with them, and you would think from her reaction that my little old 3-legged neutered tabby was a python coiled to strike. When he jumped up on her lap, I thought she was going to have a stroke.
posted by WorkingMyWayHome at 6:39 PM on August 23, 2011


I never had cats growing up. We had dogs instead. I have two cats now though and I much prefer them.
posted by web-goddess at 6:50 PM on August 23, 2011


I grew up with cats - we had bunches of them (outdoors, we lived in the country). I liked them just fine as a kid, played with them all the time. They were tame and friendly as any indoor cat.

As an adult? I can't stand them. I don't know what the switch was. Just as time went by I have found them to be less and less charming.

We have a cat. When Mr. Windigo moved in, so did she.

I don't like her, either.

I mean, look at her.
posted by Windigo at 6:51 PM on August 23, 2011 [3 favorites]


......I do love dogs, however. We had them as well growing up, also as outdoor pets. I would dearly love to have a dog now, if our apartment allowed it.
posted by Windigo at 6:54 PM on August 23, 2011


I do think in many cases it's just ignorance of cats (or a mantra they don't want to question).

Anecdotal proof: I had a friend who is severely allergic to cats and avoided them at all costs. In her early twenties, she slept over a new friend's house after a party and woke (nose running) to a cat curled around her neck while she slept. She wasn't as much horrified for allergic reactions as completely surprised by its friendliness and affection -- she told me, "I always thought cats were aloof and unfriendly! This one wanted to be petted." = cognitive dissonance

Then she started posting very right-wing things on Facebook and I had to hide her posts and hold an e-funeral for our friendship, so I don't know if she started a long love affair with cats.
posted by theredpen at 7:00 PM on August 23, 2011 [2 favorites]


I don't know if my 16-yo son counts as an adult, but he's grown up with cats and dogs and while he used to love dogs when he was in grade school, he's always disliked the cats and now does not like dogs either. He doesn't like their neediness and demands for attention, mostly.
posted by drlith at 7:02 PM on August 23, 2011


I've noticed that people who don't like cats (and don't have allergies) didn't so much grow up without cats, as either grow up without cats OR had bad experiences with cats and are now soured on the whole species.

People who grew up knowing nice, friendly cats usually like them as adults. I'm in my late 40's. Growing up, I knew few people who neutered their cats. Many had litter after litter of kittens if female or yowled and sprayed and did tomcat things if male. They lived outside, or at most were allowed in the garage or laundry room. They weren't petted or played with. So there were a LOT of aloof, unfriendly, scratch-happy cats out there. (Those were the days when dogs were allowed to roam unleashed as well, to chase bicyclists and defecate in neighbor's yards. Good times!)

Nowadays there are so many more sweet and lovely and well-socialized, flea-free cats because of improved pet-keeping. I've had people meet nice friendly cats and express incredulity that a cat can be this nice! People can be trained out of or desensitized out of bad experiences, but some just do not want to.
posted by Rosie M. Banks at 7:02 PM on August 23, 2011


But even 'friendly' cats will crawl on you with their claws.
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 7:04 PM on August 23, 2011


We had no pets growing up and I find myself liking cats much more than dogs. Still wouldn't want any of my own though.
posted by Lorin at 7:07 PM on August 23, 2011


We had a procession of goldfish, some aquatic frogs and briefly a dog when I was a kid. I got a cat nearly a year ago (this is week 50, I think) at the age of 23. It does seem, though, that I'm an exception and most people with cats had them as kids. But the only person I know who outright hates cats is quite allergic to them. Everyone else is just 'eh' about cats. Well, I suppose there's my dad, who's convinced cats are dirty or something, because they're animals.
posted by hoyland at 7:07 PM on August 23, 2011




I've noticed that people who don't like cats (and don't have allergies) didn't so much grow up without cats, as either grow up without cats OR had bad experiences with cats and are now soured on the whole species.

Nope. Grew up with them, am not allergic, liked them as a child, never had bad experiences with them.

I just don't like them.
posted by Windigo at 7:08 PM on August 23, 2011 [1 favorite]


I think a lot of whether or not someone likes cats depends on their first experieces, and some cats make much better first impressions than others. I love cats, grew up with 5 over the course of 20 years, and have 3 of my own. My experiences with those first cats were obviously good ones. By my parents neighbor's cat? yikes! I can honestly say I hate that evil, evil cat. Until meeting this devil spawn cat, I didn't think that could ever be possible.

If someones's first cat experiences were with that neighbor cat, hating cats on the assumption that's what all cats were like would be totally justifiable. If your first reactions were with my Zulu or my parents cat, liking cats or not would depend on whether or not you appreciated their aloofness and stereotypical cat weirdness. And if youre first experiences were with my Stripe growing up or my Kilo now, I'd dare you to hate cats. Ambivilence, maybe, but I contend it'd be hard to actively hate them, allergies aside. These two are perfect representations of the species, and will love you to death if you let them, leave you alone if you're not really into it, are goofy and hilarious, never pee/puke/scratch, and hardly ever need a baby-sitter. They make much, much better feline ambassadors than others.
posted by cgg at 7:22 PM on August 23, 2011


I like cats and dogs. I only had cats growing up. I got a dog in the past year. I honestly don't see as huge of a difference as people seem to make out - sure, you can't leave a dog alone as long, but our dog is sometimes snuggly and sometimes happy to just sack out by herself on the floor, just like my cat was.

I think people are weirdly more likely to stereotype cats than dogs. When dog threads come up on Metafilter, people will acknowledge that dogs have all different personalities/backgrounds, but when discussions of cats come up, people get all like "cats are so weird, you don't own a cat / the cat owns you, cats are so independent and aloof, cats are mysterious, cats don't really care about you, cats will just claw you for no reason", blah blah blah. I had a beloved cat that was snuggly and loving and I can't remember her ever clawing or biting someone unless directly provoked. (Actually, my dog has hurt me with her claws way more than my cat ever did, just because she is so! excited!) My cat also never peed all over the house until she got old and senile. Cats are just as different as dogs are.

People seem much more likely to pat themselves on the back for understanding and getting along with cats, and conversely more likely to act like cats are some mysterious creature they will never understand, for reasons I don't really get.
posted by nakedmolerats at 7:38 PM on August 23, 2011 [9 favorites]


I grew up with fish, hamsters, and (briefly) one dog. Today, I am very much in the dog camp, though my family now has cats. I've seen cats take down birds and squirrels in about 4 seconds flat, which leads me to believe that if only they were about 10% larger, they would be a serious threat to me, as well.
I get dogs. My dog looks to me for guidance, for company, for entertainment. Playing with a cat feels like it's basically just you amusing the cat. When you play with a dog, there's a little reciprocation.
posted by Gilbert at 7:45 PM on August 23, 2011


I grew up without one, used to be afraid of them (the neighbor's cat scratched for no reason, and I was under the impression that it could theoretically slash my wrist and kill me), and strongly dislike being told that I should like them. The implication that there was something deficient in my character (or in my SOUL) for wishing that I didn't live with cats probably put me off more than the smell did. I'm pretty OK with most cats, actually, but if I lived alone I wouldn't have one. I'd rather have a dog. My family didn't have a dog, either, but not because I failed to ask for one every three months or circle enough important dog ads in the classifieds.
posted by Adventurer at 7:52 PM on August 23, 2011


I've always loved cats, will probably always love them, will probably be a crazy cat lady when I'm older.

Had cats growing up.

I also like the whole feline family. Everything from Garfield to tigers, lions, leopards, cheetahs, etc, etc.

Also, windigo, awww she has no teeths!
posted by royalsong at 8:00 PM on August 23, 2011


I'm allergic, so I don't really count, but I grew up without pets, loved to (watch only, no touching) cats as a kid, and now am very disinterested in them. I don't hate them, but even presuming my allergies went away tomorrow, I would not get a cat. I think it's partially a perceived hygiene thing with me - I know my dog is not remotely hygienic, but I don't have to think about keeping her off the counter or off my bed or anything. The indoor litterbox kind of squicks me, too, even though it is obviously much more convenient than having to take a dog out multiple times a day. Cats are lovely to watch and the scratching doesn't bother me, but I definitely, definitely wouldn't want one.
posted by wending my way at 8:01 PM on August 23, 2011


Oh, and I am definitely not a pack sort of person. I am almost as unpack as you can possibly be without having some sort of socialization disorder. I've never liked that stereotype.
posted by wending my way at 8:03 PM on August 23, 2011 [1 favorite]


My father in law grew up with cats, saw one kill a nest of baby birds as a young boy, and has hated cats ever since. This always boggles my mind because he lived with a pack of terriers when he was raising his own family (my husband!) AND he regularly hunts and fishes. Ah well.
posted by ifjuly at 8:05 PM on August 23, 2011


Love cats (currently have three), didn't have one during childhood (got my first one when I was 20). I got a pug puppy for my seventh birthday and I adored her. She died when I was 19 and my parents haven't owned a pet since then.

My cats are more snuggly and lovey than most dogs I know, but I have met really assholish cats (usually the owner in question was also an asshole, but that's another subject). I love, love, love dogs but the responsibilities of dog-parenting is more than I can handle at the moment, given my own two human children and my acceptable levels of stress. The cats are super easy. Maybe someday we'll have a dog. Right now though? I'm jonesing for a kitten.
posted by cooker girl at 8:07 PM on August 23, 2011


And not to derail, but nakedmolerat, there are reasons for the difference in variety of behavior between cats and dogs--dogs are bred more specifically and have a longer history and array of breeding for personality traits and their whole domestication story is different (and totally unique).
posted by ifjuly at 8:10 PM on August 23, 2011


We grew up with dogs, guinea pigs, rabbits, lizards, frogs, and fish. No cats, because my sister was allergic.

I love dogs, but one of our dogs was aggressive and bit me in the face and we tried to train her but it didn't work and we had to return her to the shelter. Since then, I'm jumpier around badly behaved dogs, and I probably wouldn't get one unless I knew I had a ton of time and money to spend both selecting the right shelter animal and training it.

All that said . . . I got a cat during college. Sammy. He's lived in four states with me. He follows me from room to room throughout my day (I work from home). He sits on my feet in the cold bathroom in the morning and sleeps between my husband and I at night. I adore him. He's seriously the best pet I've ever had. Awesome cats are awesome. Kitties 4 lyf.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 8:15 PM on August 23, 2011 [2 favorites]


I'm calling confirmation bias. We had a series of tiny yippy annoying dogs when I was little because my mom hated cats and I'm allergic. I'm sure a lot of my current crazy cat lady tendencies come from never getting to have a cat when I was a kid.

Well, that and cats are awesome*. In fact, the only reason I don't have an entire houseful of cats and big, woofy dogs right now is that Nosy won't have it.

*I've been instructed to say that. Send treats. No, more than that. Please.
posted by Space Kitty at 8:19 PM on August 23, 2011 [4 favorites]


In my case, my father did not want any pets in our house growing up, and after a very long time, we were allowed goldfish. And then a hamster. And then another hamster, when the first one passed away. Then a guinea pig, and then multiple guinea pigs after the first guinea pig ended up pregnant when we bought her.

I was a huuuuge cat person. All I ever wanted was a cat, but Mom was allergic, my brother was allergic, and I was allergic. So, of course, when I was independent, I wound up with my first cat, Asuka. After awhile, I realized she should have another cat close to her age, and I went and adopted Azrael. Both of them are purebred Siamese, Asuka was rescued from a breeder that dumped her on a shelter because a cowlick meant that she didn't conform to breed standard, and Azzycat from an owner that surrendered him because she realized that maybe having a six-week-old kitten in her house when she only came home to sleep was not the best idea. I love them both to bits.

My brother, on the other hand, HAAAAATES cats. He won't even call my cats "cats", he calls them "allergy-bags." However, he absolutely loves dogs, and if there is a dog in the house, he'll pet them and lavish them with attention.

Weird.
posted by mornie_alantie at 8:52 PM on August 23, 2011


Grew up with cats, even have a cat now and. . . I don't like cats. The only cat I liked was my ragdoll cat who really acted like a dog. I'm a dog person. Grew up with dogs too and LOVE them. Just recently got a puppy - yay! Obligatory photo of our new puppy!
posted by Sassyfras at 9:34 PM on August 23, 2011


My husband grew up WITH OUT cats or other pets. And then he married me.

He'll never be as in love with the feline members of our family as I am - but he's keen. He was a little put off in the beginning because "cats" turned out to not to be what he imagined - they are so much more "switched on" and directly interactive than he expected. Eh.

I KNOW he couldn't imagine our household without them present, but would he chose cats in the future? Nah. I think he's keen for a dog, now.

(Ha! Ha! Dogs are less fun and more work. But to someone who never grew up with pets... he'll find out:)

Anywho. The best households have both dogs and cats, IMHO.

----

Direct to your question: THERE IS SOMETHING IN CAT POO THAT MAKES US "LOVE" THEM. It is part of their evolutionary process. LINK HERE.
posted by jbenben at 10:11 PM on August 23, 2011


This is kind of textbook confirmation bias.

/grew up without cats, like them very much as an adult
posted by desuetude at 10:17 PM on August 23, 2011


My father LOATHES cats. We had dogs; he liked the first one (given to us when friends didn't want to put her through 6 month Australian quarantine), was passive-aggressive about the second (she would bolt if a door was left open; which he often did) and seemed to like the next three.

When the neighbor's cat would come into our yard, I would tease Daddy by bringing Cosmo into the house.

I like dogs and cats, but not most birds.
posted by brujita at 10:37 PM on August 23, 2011


I didn't grow up with a cat, but I looooved cats growing up, had all kinds of cat paraphernalia, begged my mom for a cat -- she said no but let me get a dog. Then I became a dog person.

Given my childhood cat obsession I've been kind of surprised to find myself irked by cats as an adult. I don't think I would ever again agree to live in a place where a cat lived. But in reality, it's not really about the cats themselves. I think it's that I don't think I've ever seen a really sanitary living situation that included a cat. I have never seen a home with a cat where the cat did not frequently jump all over eating surfaces, and many other surfaces where you wouldn't want feet that had just been burying poop to be walking. Homes with a cat usually smell STRONGLY of cat. That's not even getting into the owners who feed their cats from the same utensils and plates they (and guests) eat from. And then all the cat-borne parasites... I think living in a house with an owner who was SUPER indulgent of their cat to a very unsanitary degree just really put me off of cats, which is sad.
posted by Ashley801 at 12:10 AM on August 24, 2011


I grew up with multiple dogs and no cats. I don't hate cats. In fact, some of my best friends are cats. But I don't really trust them. To this day, the worst injury I've ever suffered from a "wild" animal was a cat. It wanted me to scratch its belly, so I scratched its belly. It tore the hell out of my hand and forearm.

I've learned to NEVER touch a cat's belly. But I don't hate them.
posted by philip-random at 12:13 AM on August 24, 2011


Also, windigo, awww she has no teeths!
posted by royalsong


She is at least 17 and ancient and maybe a zombie and will NEVER DIE.
posted by Windigo at 5:14 AM on August 24, 2011 [1 favorite]


I grew up with a cat that I loved.

I pretty much hate cats now, or I say to people that I hate cats. I mostly hate cat owners, and think cats are meh. That averages out in conversation, especially with cat owners, into hating cats.
posted by OmieWise at 5:25 AM on August 24, 2011


I grew up with dogs and a cat. And fish. Briefly, also tiny African frogs. An anole. A secondhand parrakeet named Archimedes. Gerbils (who eat their own babies: nasty things). A painted turtle. Probably other animals, too.

Now I am grown up and it's my house and there's no cats because I hate cats, and so my mild allergies are not a burden.
posted by wenestvedt at 6:38 AM on August 24, 2011


I grew up with dogs and a snake, but I never grew up with cats. Yet for the most part I think they're cool little creatures, and will talk to and pet them if they seem up for it. I've learned their behaviors and their "tells," so I usually avoid the nastier scratches or know that when they're crawling across my lap with claws out, they're not doing it out of defense or whatever the animal equivalent of malice would be. I will say that, in the past, there have been individual cats that have pissed me off, something that no dog that I've met more than once has ever done. But when I move out of my apartment, I fully plan on getting both a cat and a dog.
posted by zombieflanders at 6:43 AM on August 24, 2011


I had cats and dogs as pets when I was a kid and all throughout my teenage years and as an adult, I hate cats. I am 100% a dog person. I have many reasons why I hate them, but I won't post them here for fear of being harassed by the cat people of MetaFilter.
posted by ATX Peanut at 6:52 AM on August 24, 2011


I didn't grow up having a cat and I thought I hated them, mainly because my aunt had a very nasty cat who would scratch the hell out of you for no reason. Seriously, I leaned down to pick up a toy one day (I was 7) and the cat came flying out from behind the sofa and scratched me right across the face. So for a long time I thought that all cats were kind of nasty like that and I didn't like them. When I went to the houses of other people who had cats I gave them a wide berth. Then when I was about 21 and still in college, my sister adopted the runt of the litter of a friend's cat. My sister, who was 16, lost all interest when she realized that the kitten was so small that it needed round the clock care and feeding (it couldn't eat on it's own, so it needed to be fed kitten chow, soaked in evaporated milk until it was mush from a spoon) so my mother took over. She actually fashioned a sort of sling from a towel and would carry the kitten around the house all day, hanging from her neck. Anyways, she grew up to be the sweetest animal you could ever hope for, very loving and affectionate, even now when she's quite old. I adore her. But for cats in general, I'm sort of indifferent, although I have a better opinion of them than I did as a child. The point being, that people who don't like cats often have a reason, even as children and that may be in fact why they didn't grow up with a cat.
posted by katyggls at 7:08 AM on August 24, 2011


I was always ambivalent about cats, I grew up with dogs. Developping cat allergies as a teenager affected my attitudes towards cats more than anything else. Cat allergies are really common; i'd imagine it's hard for people who have them to have warm fuzzy feelings about cats when they associate them with sneezing, wheezing and hives.

I've come around (and found better antihistamines) from my dislike of cats, but I still view them as the pet you get when you cannot get a dog. On the opposite side, my boyfriend grew up with dogs and cannot stand them.
posted by inertia at 8:33 AM on August 24, 2011


Mostly birds and rabbits in our house growing up, but I spent a lot of time at the home of a close relation who lived next-door and had a beloved cat. I'm currently okay-to-meh on indoor cats, loathe outdoor cats on ecological grounds, and agree with OmniWise in finding the cloying kitteh!philia of some cat owners far more annoying than the cats themselves.
posted by Bardolph at 9:07 AM on August 24, 2011


I never owned or even knew a cat until I was thirty. Now I love the haughty, crazy little beasts more than any other animal in the world.

Just a random data point against the idea that people who don't grow up with cats tend to hate them.
posted by Decani at 10:40 AM on August 24, 2011 [1 favorite]


Best answer: I think it depends on (a) the person, (b) the cats, and (c) the nature of what it meant to "grow up with" cats in a family that kept them.

E.g., for most of my childhood we had only ONE cat (a Siamese named Tim who we adopted from a newspaper ad -- he was being re-homed due to not getting along with his previous human's other kitty). Because previous-human had declawed him (grrr...) he had to be an indoor cat, and due to a combination of that and his innate zany-gregarious personality I would imagine I wasn't the only one in the household who thought of him as basically a family member.

But I know this isn't the only way to "grow up with cats". I know plenty of people whose parents only ever had outdoor/barn cats, and that's a whole different kind of relationship (and one that can vary greatly depending on a myriad of factors).

My dad also used to say (before we finally got Tim) that he disliked cats unless they were Siamese, because Siamese cats were "smart" and "like dogs". But while Tim was smart (and much loved by all of us, including my dad) he never struck me as especially dog-like.

We had three dogs (not all at the same time) during my formative years, and they always just seemed incredibly high-maintenance, loud, smelly, and disrespectful of one's personal space. Granted that wasn't their fault (my mom, despite her love of collies as a breed, never really seemed inclined to train them properly at a young enough age), being dogs and all. My grandparents had some dogs I liked, but they also has a vast 40-acre property in the hills of Vermont where the pups were able to run off their energy. But no cat I've met has really come across as "more doglike than catlike" to me, including the ones that play fetch.

I think it's partly a smell thing for me (the vast majority of dogs seem to have this weird odor that their own humans can't detect/don't care about but that sticks to EVERYTHING in a "doggy home". Like a mix of sour milk, leather, and a whiff of fart). Cats, IMO, generally smell wonderful, and a properly-maintained litter box will not smell at all (seriously, I have three litterboxes in my house and no guest so far has been able to detect any "cat odor". If you smell ammonia, even when scooping the box, you're doing it wrong.).

But mostly I think it comes down to "relational style" and possibly a body-language component. My own body language is a bit on the atypical side, and the majority of dogs I encounter treat me similarly to how a lot of human extroverts do: that is, they pester me incessantly for some sort of acknowledgment-response that apparently I don't naturally produce. Which just gets....tiring after a while.

In other words, being around a lot of dogs feels to me like being around human kids of that age when they're going "LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME! HEY LOOK AT THIS!" about everything, or around the kind of people who constantly ask "are you okay? are you okay? You look lonely! You look bored! Why don't you smile???" when I am just being quiet and feel perfectly fine. Whereas with cats, even when they're being obnoxious it never feels like the same kind of obnoxiousness. They just seem more...polite, somehow, even when they're politely shoving their butt in your face. I don't know. Maybe it's mind control, but really, I think that my personal status as "cat person" was set pretty early in life.

...and after all that rambling, I guess my short answer to the original question is: without performing a proper scientifically-designed survey of a large-enough chunk of the population, pretty much all you can get from a question like the one you asked is liable to be "anecdata". If that's useful to you, then I think you've gotten a good sample already, but my personal *opinion* is that there probably is NOT a correlation between like/dislike of cats (as an adult) and the mere presence/absence of cats in a household during one's childhood. Too many other factors figure in, and plus, people's tastes and priorities can change over time.
posted by aecorwin at 11:41 AM on August 24, 2011 [2 favorites]


Response by poster: Thank you for your responses, everybody. I think since the answers were so all over the board, I still can't be sure what, if any, connection there is between growing up with cats in the home and how one feels about cats as an adult. I'm definitely more interested in information about people who say they "HATE" cats, rather than the people who say they're "eh" about cats or don't like them because they have allergies.

But anyway, it was still interesting reading your thoughts on the matter! Thanks again!
posted by smirkyfodder at 4:36 PM on August 24, 2011


I think since the answers were so all over the board, I still can't be sure what, if any, connection there is between growing up with cats in the home and how one feels about cats as an adult.

No apparent connection. In science we call this "accepting the null hypothesis." That is, your hypothesis, that there is such a connection, has been falsified. AskMe triumphs again.
posted by pH Indicating Socks at 5:09 PM on August 24, 2011


« Older Movies Featuring Successful Women   |   Help Human Resources help me Newer »
This thread is closed to new comments.