CatBehaviorFilter: How do we deal with our cat's strange aggression towards my husband?
January 8, 2011 11:49 AM Subscribe
CatBehaviorFilter: How do we deal with our cat's strange aggression towards my husband?
We adopted this young stray scoundrel, Bubbles, almost a year ago; he is now an estimated 2 1/2 years old. He has been very well behaved for the most part, except for being very vocal in his love for food. He was an indoor/outdoor cat until he broke his hip about 4 months ago (apparently he has weak growth plates, so just about anything could've caused the break), and since then has been indoor only.
In play he knows his boundaries, not using his claws, playful nips followed by kisses, etc. Only occasionally will he get a little carried away. My husband is the one who plays with him physically most often, with tickling, wrestling, letting him attack his arm, etc.
In the last month or so, Bubbles has been displaying a new aggression. In the evenings, when husband is getting out of the shower or into bed, sometimes in the morning, Bubs will corner him. As husband describes - he'll get close, sit down, advance, sit down, and continue to advance slowly this way with a blank look in his eyes. The hair on the ridge of his back may be slightly raised, but otherwise will not have an aggressive posture. Then without provocation, he will spring and attack the closest body part, usually the leg, but sometimes the arm if hubby is trying to stop him. He may keep attacking until, and even when, husband is safe in bed.
This behavior freaks out my husband, and he feels like there's no way to defuse the situation once Bubbles has started this. He's never attacked me this way, except once when I tried to get in between the two.
It seems like this is some kind of redirected aggression, as Bubbles will often sit at the bedroom window, near husband's side of the bed, and get upset if he sees neighbor cats outside the window. But he now attacks my husband nightly, even when he hasn't recently seen a cat outside the window. So now it seems like the behavior has become habitual, triggered just by seeing my husband in that part of the bedroom or bathroom at that time of the day.
Has anyone else experienced this kind of aggression? What is going on, and most importantly, how can we stop this behavior?
We adopted this young stray scoundrel, Bubbles, almost a year ago; he is now an estimated 2 1/2 years old. He has been very well behaved for the most part, except for being very vocal in his love for food. He was an indoor/outdoor cat until he broke his hip about 4 months ago (apparently he has weak growth plates, so just about anything could've caused the break), and since then has been indoor only.
In play he knows his boundaries, not using his claws, playful nips followed by kisses, etc. Only occasionally will he get a little carried away. My husband is the one who plays with him physically most often, with tickling, wrestling, letting him attack his arm, etc.
In the last month or so, Bubbles has been displaying a new aggression. In the evenings, when husband is getting out of the shower or into bed, sometimes in the morning, Bubs will corner him. As husband describes - he'll get close, sit down, advance, sit down, and continue to advance slowly this way with a blank look in his eyes. The hair on the ridge of his back may be slightly raised, but otherwise will not have an aggressive posture. Then without provocation, he will spring and attack the closest body part, usually the leg, but sometimes the arm if hubby is trying to stop him. He may keep attacking until, and even when, husband is safe in bed.
This behavior freaks out my husband, and he feels like there's no way to defuse the situation once Bubbles has started this. He's never attacked me this way, except once when I tried to get in between the two.
It seems like this is some kind of redirected aggression, as Bubbles will often sit at the bedroom window, near husband's side of the bed, and get upset if he sees neighbor cats outside the window. But he now attacks my husband nightly, even when he hasn't recently seen a cat outside the window. So now it seems like the behavior has become habitual, triggered just by seeing my husband in that part of the bedroom or bathroom at that time of the day.
Has anyone else experienced this kind of aggression? What is going on, and most importantly, how can we stop this behavior?
Seconding cosmicbandito, is he neutered? Have you talked to your vet? Have you tried going the spray bottle route? Maybe keep a few spray bottles of water around the house and spritzing him when he goes into this mode. Also, maybe you could try Feliway? It comes in a spray and also in a room diffuser. It's expensive at the pet store but you can find it for good prices on Amazon.
posted by MaryDellamorte at 12:11 PM on January 8, 2011
posted by MaryDellamorte at 12:11 PM on January 8, 2011
My cat gets a bit of this sometimes. I tell him NO or hiss at him, disengage/move away, and try to offer him a different target. This Kong Kickeroo cat toy (a stuffed fabric tube with a fuzzy tail) seems to work well as a target for biting/attacking. I'm not sure, but eye contact seems to be part of the cycle with my cat, lately I've been trying to look well to the side of the cat's eyes when trying to defuse fighting.
posted by LobsterMitten at 12:23 PM on January 8, 2011
posted by LobsterMitten at 12:23 PM on January 8, 2011
Cats get used to spray bottles. Well, some number of them do. But usually pennies in a can is not something they get used to. When he shows the aggressive, not wanted behavior, shake the pennies and say very firmly, in your Big Cat Voice, "NO."
posted by Medieval Maven at 12:25 PM on January 8, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by Medieval Maven at 12:25 PM on January 8, 2011 [1 favorite]
One of my cats did this with my ex-husband. It started after a few years after we got him. He was loving and playful with me and would growl and lash out at him.
We never figured it out (but he has the cats now, so I assume it went away).
posted by Pax at 12:26 PM on January 8, 2011
We never figured it out (but he has the cats now, so I assume it went away).
posted by Pax at 12:26 PM on January 8, 2011
Response by poster: Yes, he's neutered. He wasn't when we found him, but fixed him as soon as we could.
Haven't talked to the vet yet, I guess we've had some bad experiences with vets, but it's worth a try!
We haven't tried the spray bottle in this situation yet - we've had some luck in using it to keep him off the kitchen counter, but he eventually is unphased by it. Now we only use it when he's really getting into our food, and he otherwise does whatever he wants on the counter (we gave up!)
I've also tried Feliway when introducing cats to new situations, but I could never tell if it was effective. Also worth a try!
Vets, behaviorists, and feliway cost $$$, and we've already spent more on him than the average cat (hip operation, new mattress after we went on vacation, plus he loves to climb door frames) so I'd love some cheap methods for behavior modification, but if it takes dollars to fix this situation, we will spend dollars!
posted by feidr2 at 12:30 PM on January 8, 2011
Haven't talked to the vet yet, I guess we've had some bad experiences with vets, but it's worth a try!
We haven't tried the spray bottle in this situation yet - we've had some luck in using it to keep him off the kitchen counter, but he eventually is unphased by it. Now we only use it when he's really getting into our food, and he otherwise does whatever he wants on the counter (we gave up!)
I've also tried Feliway when introducing cats to new situations, but I could never tell if it was effective. Also worth a try!
Vets, behaviorists, and feliway cost $$$, and we've already spent more on him than the average cat (hip operation, new mattress after we went on vacation, plus he loves to climb door frames) so I'd love some cheap methods for behavior modification, but if it takes dollars to fix this situation, we will spend dollars!
posted by feidr2 at 12:30 PM on January 8, 2011
Cats are such bastards. I think, since yer mister is the one who roughhouses with him, Bubbles might see him as appropriate play prey. A soggy, defenseless human flipping around a towel in close quarters on a set routine might be too tempting a target. Bubbles needs something else to stalk.
Break up the routine that seems to set him off. If he still starts the aggressive pattern, interrupt it with the can of coins, then redirect him to something more interesting.
posted by pajamazon at 1:16 PM on January 8, 2011 [1 favorite]
Break up the routine that seems to set him off. If he still starts the aggressive pattern, interrupt it with the can of coins, then redirect him to something more interesting.
posted by pajamazon at 1:16 PM on January 8, 2011 [1 favorite]
It sounds like your husband is in the habit of retreating when the cat starts advancing, which probably only encourages the cat think of him as prey. I'd be tempted to turn the tables and move towards the cat with some show of aggression instead of fear.
posted by jon1270 at 1:27 PM on January 8, 2011
posted by jon1270 at 1:27 PM on January 8, 2011
I'd suggest that you immediately stop any kind of roughhousing with the cat; it's usually a good idea to keep a strong distance between Things Cats Can Chew (toy mouse, ball...) and Things Cats Cannot Chew (humans).
posted by thomas j wise at 1:42 PM on January 8, 2011 [2 favorites]
posted by thomas j wise at 1:42 PM on January 8, 2011 [2 favorites]
The male cat I have, Bug, who is now just about 3/3.5 years old, did this sort of thing for a little while earlier this year. He and I had gotten into a rough-housing phase wherein I'd mess with him and we'd play until he clawed me. I quit initiating that sort of play; he then started stalking me and would grab my legs....
I've redirected his need to play and stalk things by getting a few toys: a laser pointer, a 'cat dancer' ribbon thing, a pouch of catnip and several balls. He stopped stalking me but in the transition period, when he'd start that behavior, I'd toss a ball for him to go chase. YMMV.
posted by LOLAttorney2009 at 2:19 PM on January 8, 2011
I've redirected his need to play and stalk things by getting a few toys: a laser pointer, a 'cat dancer' ribbon thing, a pouch of catnip and several balls. He stopped stalking me but in the transition period, when he'd start that behavior, I'd toss a ball for him to go chase. YMMV.
posted by LOLAttorney2009 at 2:19 PM on January 8, 2011
I think thomas j wise has a good point. I know one very unfriendly attack cat, and she lives with a fellow who gives her lots of rough-housing attention. This doesn't help you so much with changing this current behavior, but it might be helpful to keep in mind for the future.
In other news, spray bottles stay more effective if you put a bit of lemon juice or vinegar in them. At least, that worked on my dog when I was a kid.
posted by lover at 2:29 PM on January 8, 2011
In other news, spray bottles stay more effective if you put a bit of lemon juice or vinegar in them. At least, that worked on my dog when I was a kid.
posted by lover at 2:29 PM on January 8, 2011
Cats are supposed to mature between 2 and 3 years of age. That's probably why his behavior has changed. I would challenge the behavior the moment your husband notices that he's "at it again". Shake a can full of coins or clap loudly the moment Bubbles adopts that posture or gets the look in his eyes. Also seconding stopping roughhousing. I think it will pass as he matures. Good luck.
posted by Shusha at 2:37 PM on January 8, 2011
posted by Shusha at 2:37 PM on January 8, 2011
Growing up we had a cat that swatted my mother every time she saw my mother. I remember my mother always had scratched ankles. My mother assumed that since this cat loved my father, she was jealous of my mother. We had the cat for many years until she died of old age, my mother had scratched ankles the whole time! Could it be a jealousy thing?
I would go with positive reinforcement, get some treats your cat loves beyond all else. Have your husband hand feed these treats to the cat: only your husband and only from his hand. I have done this with feral cats to tame them, it works to gain trust. Another thing, when the cat acts strangely, ignore it. Don't freak out, just ignore it. After all your husband is a large primate and your cat is a tiny feline. If your husband acts upset, the cat wins.
posted by fifilaru at 3:04 PM on January 8, 2011
I would go with positive reinforcement, get some treats your cat loves beyond all else. Have your husband hand feed these treats to the cat: only your husband and only from his hand. I have done this with feral cats to tame them, it works to gain trust. Another thing, when the cat acts strangely, ignore it. Don't freak out, just ignore it. After all your husband is a large primate and your cat is a tiny feline. If your husband acts upset, the cat wins.
posted by fifilaru at 3:04 PM on January 8, 2011
Lots of possibilities here, but I think it may well be as simple as what thomas j wise said. You've opened the door to playing rough, and the cat of course can't grasp the nuance of when that's ok and when it's not. So you end up training the cat that sneak attacking for fun is OK, and then when he does it seems surprising to you. Think about it. Bubbles is totally stoked for his buddy to get out of the shower, cornered, for an easy pounce.
I love cats and used to play rough with them (within reason, like your husband I assume). Cats are game for that, they are hunters. But they really don't know when it's ok and when it's not, and you can't blame them. He now associates your husband with wrestling. Some more cat-savvy people made me hip to this not being so smart. Try to train your cat not to play rough with your hands/human body (though it's hard and takes time to un-open that door). You can still get your cat play in with string and toy mice, and then the cat should go for those things, not people hands. Be consistent.
I'm not an animal mind-reader, but I doubt your husband is in danger. Cat play fighting can seem rough, but a cat who actually wanted to attack can do some serious damage.
posted by quarterframer at 3:58 PM on January 8, 2011
I love cats and used to play rough with them (within reason, like your husband I assume). Cats are game for that, they are hunters. But they really don't know when it's ok and when it's not, and you can't blame them. He now associates your husband with wrestling. Some more cat-savvy people made me hip to this not being so smart. Try to train your cat not to play rough with your hands/human body (though it's hard and takes time to un-open that door). You can still get your cat play in with string and toy mice, and then the cat should go for those things, not people hands. Be consistent.
I'm not an animal mind-reader, but I doubt your husband is in danger. Cat play fighting can seem rough, but a cat who actually wanted to attack can do some serious damage.
posted by quarterframer at 3:58 PM on January 8, 2011
My mum's cat was aggressive with her, attacking her from behind and sinking his teeth into her arm on occasion. The cat came very close to being authanized due to aggression. The way that my mum got his behaviour to change was by ignoring him, especially after she had not seen him for awhile - for example, after coming home and upon waking up. She also did not let him on her lap or offer affection for awhile. Perhaps this is similar to Cesar Millan's 'no talk, no touch, no eye contact' philosphophy. Cat-human relationships at my mother's house are much improved now - the cat gets attention and affection, but on my mum's terms. Perhaps your husband could try steering clear of the cat for awhile, act aloof, and see if that helps.
posted by analog at 5:25 PM on January 8, 2011
posted by analog at 5:25 PM on January 8, 2011
Nthing the 'don't roughhouse with the cat' thing. We have a foundling who was fairly aggressive initially. We broke off contact whenever she got too rough and she's figured out that claws-in is play, and claws-out means that we're going away.
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 7:46 PM on January 8, 2011
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 7:46 PM on January 8, 2011
Spray your husband with catnip spray, and then they should have cuddles.
posted by Trivia Newton John at 4:53 AM on January 9, 2011
posted by Trivia Newton John at 4:53 AM on January 9, 2011
I would redirect his attention to something it's okay for him to attack, like a laser pointer or stuffed toy or something. Have your husband take them into the bathroom, and bring them with him when he comes out. I'm thinking this has something to do with feeling threatened somehow by the cats he sees outside. Let him act out, but on something that is ok to eviscerate. If he can't be redirected immediately, your husband needs to stop his feet and run after him to give him a scare. Then play with him for a long while so that cat can get his anxiety out.
posted by oneirodynia at 10:08 AM on January 9, 2011
posted by oneirodynia at 10:08 AM on January 9, 2011
Agreeing with the posters who suggest not rough housing with the kitty as play with your hands. Cats can get randomly hyped up and aggressive for many reasons. They'll be just sitting around cuddling and then get all rough and tumble run in circles with each other. Setting up your person as one of their possible aggressive playmates isn't recommended since they will decide you are fair game for attack whenever they feel like attacking. It's also a bummer for guests who pet your kitty and are met with biting that may seem playful to the owner but doesn't read quite the same to a stranger.
A tactic I read to calm down an aggressive cat is to hold them down to the ground by the neck (not hard but firm enough so they can't run off) say NO and hold them that way until their body relaxes. I do this with my cats whenever they misdirect any aggressive play at me and it works like a charm. I've only had to do it a few times and they stop the behavior, permanently for the most part.
posted by amycup at 6:29 PM on January 9, 2011
A tactic I read to calm down an aggressive cat is to hold them down to the ground by the neck (not hard but firm enough so they can't run off) say NO and hold them that way until their body relaxes. I do this with my cats whenever they misdirect any aggressive play at me and it works like a charm. I've only had to do it a few times and they stop the behavior, permanently for the most part.
posted by amycup at 6:29 PM on January 9, 2011
Response by poster: Thanks for all of the tips! We are definitely stopping the physical play, limiting play to toys. We will also try the coins in a tin, distracting with other toys, feliway, and other advice. I'll keep y'all updated if anything works.
posted by feidr2 at 7:43 PM on January 10, 2011
posted by feidr2 at 7:43 PM on January 10, 2011
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by cosmicbandito at 12:03 PM on January 8, 2011 [1 favorite]