Pimp my suit

August 21, 2010 4:48 PM

How to dress up a suit got a black-tie-optional event?

I'm going to a wedding with multiple events, one of which is "black tie optional." As I understand this phrase, it's never really optional...but I can't really get a tux. What can I do to dress up my suit? Pocket square, little flowers, etc?

posted by anonymous to Clothing, Beauty, & Fashion (9 answers total)

If you're wearing a suit to something that's "black tie optional," it really should be a dark suit (black, charcoal, navy, maybe a very dark brown) without stripes, dots, or checks.

I would actually suggest not accessorizing with a pocket square or similar; you're going for restrained elegance. Wear a white shirt, with French cuffs if possible, and a simple, solid color silk necktie.
posted by AkzidenzGrotesk at 5:08 PM on August 21, 2010 [4 favorites]

I just went to a black tie optional wedding last month. I saw a lot of people wearing (dark) suits, not many wearing tuxes. YMMV.
posted by galadriel at 5:14 PM on August 21, 2010

If you have a dark plain suit, as AkzidenzGrotesk says, you should be fine. You'll definitely want a black tie as well.

That being said, don't tie yourself up in knots about this. It's a wedding. Under no circumstances should you have to buy expensive clothing (or waste money renting) just so you can be found socially acceptable at an event celebrating a relationship.

A few questions though: What's your suit like? How time distant is the wedding? What's your suit size?
posted by Phyltre at 5:14 PM on August 21, 2010

From back in the day when we had to memorize most of Emily Post, or at least Amy Vanderbilt, I liked to remember, when people got worried about black tie, that those mavens said something like "the dinner jacket (never called a tuxedo) is essentially a frivolous garment and is never considered formal attire." So relax and do as AkzidenzGrotesk suggests. Nothing colorful, though. French cuffs are great if you have such a shirt. Plain cuff links, dark solid color silk tie. Celebrate the couple and charm the guests. Have fun.
posted by Anitanola at 5:35 PM on August 21, 2010

My husband wears a very dark suit, white, shirt, and often this tie (in gold on black) to black tie optional business events, and gets constant compliments even from old dudes in tuxes on how sharp he looks. I think it's the tie.

I honestly think people say "black tie optional" so women can wear their formalest, prettiest dresses while men can wear suits and not bother with tuxes. That way everybody's happy. (For the subset of everybody who doesn't mind getting dressed up for these things.)
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 6:00 PM on August 21, 2010 [1 favorite]

("white shirt," no comma.)
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 6:01 PM on August 21, 2010

I don't think you need to do much to dress it up, so long as you wear an appropriate suit. A dark, non-pin-striped navy would be best, with black shoes. You could definitely wear a pocket square, but I wouldn't go crazy with it - white seems appropriate and classy. As for tie, I think a dark gray wool would look nice with navy and a white shirt (e.g.)
posted by ecab at 11:26 PM on August 21, 2010

Dark suit and a "wedding tie," which is kind of a real thing. Discussed in this blog post. Here are some examples.
posted by mullacc at 1:12 AM on August 22, 2010

You shouldn't "dress up" your suit, because the key to a good tuxedo is simplicity. And black-tie optional really does mean optional - most men will be wearing suits.

Just wear a simple dark suit and a good-looking tie and you will be fine. Black shoes are probably a better idea than brown shoes, but both will work fine. The pocket square should be white, and so should your shirt.
posted by twblalock at 6:58 AM on August 22, 2010