Where is my Ed Hardy edition Bluetooth headset?
February 22, 2010 12:01 PM   Subscribe

I am hoping someone can explain why 2 pop cultural phenomenons are considered offensive and/or worthy of sometimes extreme derision: Ed Hardy and Bluetooth headsets.

I am confused by repeated statements of anger, bordering on disgust and outrage, about 2 topics.

1. Ed Hardy is a tattoo artist, and apparently started making clothes and cologne. I got a bottle of his cologne for Christmas, and it smells fine. I hear people deride him and his clothing often, but not his actual tattoo work. I am assuming his clothes are decorated in a similar art style to his tattoos, so why would it be okay to get a real Ed Hardy tattoo but not wear an Ed Hardy shirt? It can't be misappropriation if he himself is who licensed all the work, right?

2. Bluetooth headsets seem incredibly useful and convenient. Holding a cell phone to your ear is at times inconvenient and at other times impossible. I often use a wired earpiece while driving (cell calls while driving are not outlawed in my state) and I've also used Bluetooth headsets in the past, but I tend to break and/or loose them. Why do so many people get intensely upset about this topic? The "hate" doesn't seem to be about cell phone usage in general, it is specifically about using Bluetooth headsets whilst talking on the phone.

I've always felt at ease with pop culture and music, and especially technology. But I am getting older, and I'm concerned that somehow I've completely missed the boat on these topics, as it seems so blatantly obvious, almost unanimous, to so many commentators but yet I remain mystified.

Also, it just occurred to me when re-reading, related to #1, I've heard several people recently denounce males wearing cologne. I think it was here I read someone say "I didn't know straight guys wore cologne". Has there been some shift in acceptability of scents on males in the last few years? Practically every straight male I know wears either aftershave or cologne. I wear cologne probably once or twice a week, in very small quantities. Am I "doing it wrong" as the kids say now?

A little help?

(P.S. And to clarify, it's not that I care if I am trendy or not, because I'm not, and I don't. I only care that I appear to be out of touch, which is never good.)
posted by discountfortunecookie to Society & Culture (46 answers total) 3 users marked this as a favorite
I think the hate directed towards those two things have less to do with the products themselves and more to do with the annoying people who stereotypically use them, and the annoying behavior of those people. Especially the Ed Hardy stuff, which is stereotypically worn by over-gelled aging frat boys.
posted by Ashley801 at 12:04 PM on February 22, 2010 [11 favorites]

2. The hate comes from people taking advantage of the convience Bluetooth technology and talking on their phone everywhere on the goddamn planet at all times without regard to the people around them.
posted by nitsuj at 12:05 PM on February 22, 2010 [6 favorites]

The Blue Tooth hate is about 1) resentment toward those with enough money to purchase one/feel important enough to need to wear one at all times and 2) only old people wear a blue tooth. Also, they give you cancer (unverified, but they do. just wait).
posted by Lutoslawski at 12:06 PM on February 22, 2010

1. The clothes are loud and bejeweled. Lots of people don't like loud and bejeweled. The tattoos are usually much smaller, represent a more personal choice, and are often covered by non-bejeweled clothing.

2. Most of the bluetooth ire comes from standing in line somewhere and thinking someone is talking to you, when they're actually talking to someone on their headset. See also: baristas dealing with more of the same.

On preview: I also agree with Ashley's interpretation.
posted by craven_morhead at 12:06 PM on February 22, 2010 [1 favorite]

also what nitsuj said. x 1,000.
posted by Lutoslawski at 12:06 PM on February 22, 2010

2 words:
conspicuous consumption

more words:
Ed Hardy clothing says "Look at me, I can pay $200 for a t-shirt and $300 for a pair of ripped up made in malaysia pants!"

BT's ARE handy. They become the stuff of douchebags who parade them around self importantly who are just waaaay toooooo buuuusssy to actualy *hold* a phone.
posted by TomMelee at 12:08 PM on February 22, 2010 [3 favorites]

Ed Hardy's clothes are found all over reality TV, especially on VH1's "Celebreality" series (such as Rock of Love, Tool Academy, etc.). I believe he licenses his products to these reality TV shows, so a lot of the Ed Hardy hate I see is related to the characters on those shows (and the character of those characters, as it were).
posted by xingcat at 12:09 PM on February 22, 2010

I like cologne. Straight male, 48 years old. Ed Hardy? I just hate legible clothing. The shirts are hideous. Bluetooth fine in car, tool in supermarket or walking down the street.
posted by fixedgear at 12:10 PM on February 22, 2010 [2 favorites]

Worth noting: Ed Hardy merchandise is produced by Christian Audigier, who was also responsible for the popularity of Von Dutch in the early 2000s - and Von Dutch was derided in much the same way when it was trendy.

Ed Hardy merchandise is ubiquitous these days. There's Ed Hardy-branded candy, for crying out loud. And just about anything that is explosively trendy, especially if you can spot it at fifty feet like an Ed Hardy shirt (or, say, Crocs), will receive a good bit of backlash at the height or decline of its popularity.
posted by Metroid Baby at 12:13 PM on February 22, 2010 [1 favorite]

2. Most of the bluetooth ire comes from standing in line somewhere and thinking someone is talking to you, when they're actually talking to someone on their headset. See also: baristas dealing with more of the same.

This. It's disorienting when people use these in public, and embarrassing, if you mistake their talking towards you as talking to you.

I could care less how much they cost, though. I didn't even know they were particularly expensive.

I am assuming his clothes are decorated in a similar art style to his tattoos, so why would it be okay to get a real Ed Hardy tattoo but not wear an Ed Hardy shirt?

Tattoo-style art on people without tattoos is a little weird. My feeling (as a visibly tattooed person) is that it's a bit poseur-ish and wimpy. If you like tattoo art so much, get a tattoo, not a shirt that is styled to look like a tattoo. But this bothers me considerably less than the bluetooth thing.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 12:13 PM on February 22, 2010

It is exactly as everyone here will mention.

The people that were Ed Hardy clothing are reasonably likely to be giant douchebags. It is not universal, but it is DEFINITELY the stereotype.

Many bluetooth people are so concerned with their convenience, comfort, and own personal agenda that they choose to talk even when they are in an environment where it is socially frowned upon.

These things are also slightly out of style status symbols.
-The Ed Hardy image is "I am so fucking cool, and all of you guys should know it" (see links below)
-Hot Chicks With Douchebags
-My New Haircut
-The Bluetooth image is "I am so fucking important that I need to be able to talk whenever, wherever, no matter what"
posted by milqman at 12:13 PM on February 22, 2010

ed hardy licensed his designs for clothes. the guy who licensed the clothes formerly worked for Von Dutch - another line that has about the same reputation. one of the best examples of the ed hardy douche is jon gosselin. an overweight, out of touch, aging manchild who ignores his responsibilities and instead dates 20 year olds and wears expensive, but trashy clothes.

as for bluetooth - using one, just fine. walking around with one in all day, interrupting face to face conversations to use it, making a big deal about how cool you are for having one - this is what people hate. it's the same sort of backlash that happened originally at cell phones. i know people who won't even take them out for portrait sessions with the family. there's a sort of self importance that the worst offenders just reek of.

like orange tans, lots of hair gel, axe body spray, and trucker hats - ed hardy and too much bluetooth just comes off as tacky and trashy, but even worse, they're the kind of tacky and trashy you spend a lot of money on.
posted by nadawi at 12:15 PM on February 22, 2010 [4 favorites]

Other people are right about the dislike being more for the kinds of people who use the two products you mentioned.

As for cologne: there have always been, and always will be, people who hate fragrances on other people. You're not doing anything wrong by wearing a small amount of cologne sometimes. If you're doing it to attract women then all it does is tip your odds toward women who tend to like the cologne and away from women who don't like cologne in general or your cologne in particular. Nothing wrong with that; it's like any fashion choice you make, really.
posted by Nattie at 12:16 PM on February 22, 2010

>: 2. Most of the bluetooth ire comes from standing in line somewhere and thinking someone is talking to you, when they're actually talking to someone on their headset. See also: baristas dealing with more of the same.

Oh man, YES. That was one of the most annoying parts of the job, besides the crazy rich bitches who would yell at and elbow people in line to get to the front of the line. They wouldn't even respond when I would ask them what they'd like to get, but they'd stand there right in front of the register as if they were about to order. It's really disrespectful.
posted by dunkadunc at 12:18 PM on February 22, 2010 [1 favorite]

Re: 2 - Sometimes, it might seem (even if only in a well-based imagination) that certain people might wear bluetooth headsets specifically because they think they'll make them (the people) "look cool". Also...

(and this statement relates to your #1 as well)

... people who put effort and money into "looking cool" (or worse, "being cool" using the same -- arguably ineffective -- methods) can really annoy other people, who believe deeply that this sort of effort is profoundly wasteful. This has to do with the belief that the same time and money could be going into actually improving the world, human relationships, feeding the hungry, etc.

(That said, I personally am slowly coming around to the idea that "trying to look cool" is not necessarily more of a waste of time than other pursuits. The obvious signs of it do, however, tend to trigger some kind of automatic "avoid" response in me, which I have still to conquer)
posted by amtho at 12:19 PM on February 22, 2010

From what I understand, Ed Hardy is a fairly respected tattoo artist, but he licensed his name and brand and tattoo designs to a clothing designer who is, as far as I know, responsible for the clothing and cologne and so forth. "Ed Hardy" the brand is not the direct product of Ed Hardy the tattoo artist and Real Person. There's a little more about it on wikipedia.

Basically, people above have answered the other questions: the two things you're asking about are associated with obnoxious people. Ed Hardy is generally regarded (from what I can tell) as clothing for trashy young people and people who want to look young and trashy (ie, Jon Gosselin, the most famous Ed Hardy wearer of the last year or so). A Bluetooth headset seems to be associated with executive-type people (or people who aspire to be "executive" in appearance if not job title) who are just so busy and important they are always on their phone and talk on their phone all the time with no regard to the people around them. A similar stereotype is associated with Blackberry users- they're such a big deal (or think they are) they need constant email access (although as Blackberries and smartphones have become more common, I think this stereotype is losing some of its power).
posted by MadamM at 12:20 PM on February 22, 2010

About cologne: I think awareness of allergies, and maybe the occurrence of allergies, has been rising. If you're going to be in close proximity to people (maybe even in an elevator), then it can be inconsiderate to wear cologne or any scent.

With more people congregating in urban areas, and working office jobs, this becomes more of a concern. If anti-cologne sentiment is on the rise, this could account for it.

(PS - Never wear cologne to a choir practice or any sort of group music/theater practice or performance)
posted by amtho at 12:22 PM on February 22, 2010 [1 favorite]

I am guessing that it may be because Don Ed Hardy was/is considered a well respected tattoo artist who honored the tradition, history and art of tattooing. I have been in that world when it mattered 'who' did your work, your relationship with the artist, their skill level, history, etc. These things had value. (nowadays, I rarely get asked 'who did your work', sad).

The Ed Hardy brand can seem almost in direct contrast to that. Mainstream, accessible to anyone with money, but not necessarily with knowledge of the history, importance, etc. of the art form, etc. Taking the superficial without the depth of the artwork.

Kind of like a punk rocker seeing Docs in a fashion spread.
posted by Vaike at 12:26 PM on February 22, 2010 [1 favorite]

The problem with Ed Hardy is that tattoos are traditionally considered part of counterculture, and having middle-class suburban douchebags adorn themselves with a corporate co-opted consumerist version of it offends the sensibilities of many because it cheapens it.

The obvious response is "Well, you should have thought of that when you decided to define your social movement by how it consumes art/music/sex/food/etc differently from the mainstream." It seems blindingly obvious that inventing new forms of countercultural consumption that is out of the reach of the mainstream is precisely what makes it attractive to the mainstream, making it possible for corporations to co-opt it. In other words, doesn't counterculture aid capitalism by inventing new demographic segments and product opportunities? People who hate Ed Hardy deny this, they continue to claim that counterculture offers a form of resistance.

And also: those Ed Hardy guys are fucking insufferable.
posted by AlsoMike at 12:28 PM on February 22, 2010 [4 favorites]

Yeah, I'm gonna say in addition to conspicuous consumption, the reaction to Hardy clothes is similar to what you see when a counterculture or undreground/undiscovered band is suddenly all over the radio, on shirts being worn by people who probably have no idea of origins, etc.

And two, bluetooth headsets are annoying even when the person isn't talking because there's this cyborg attachment jutting out of their head and it looks like they might need to take a call at any given second. Today in one of my classes I had a student wearing a headset and while it didn't throw me off completely, I did wonder, why not take the thing off? Are you expecting to take a call while I'm up here at the board?
posted by dervish at 12:37 PM on February 22, 2010

Even further with the Bluetooth confusion as to who the user is talking to is the feeling you get, not just that they're so important that they need constant access to the phone, but that weird feeling that they'll get a call at any minute.
posted by Pax at 12:38 PM on February 22, 2010

Regarding Bluetooth: I don't know if you remember when answering machines first became popular, but there was a lot of tooth-gnashing backlash against them: "I hate talking to a machine," "it's so dehumanizing," and so forth. Nowadays I'm sure there are still answering machine haters, but there are many more people who are going to be annoyed if they can't leave a message for you while you're out.

This sort of thing happens with any new technology: Cars scare the horses, computers are soulless and incomprehensible, blogs are nothing but valueless narcissism. And while there's often a seed of truth to the complaints -- cars really did scare the horses, for instance -- the fact is that people adopt, use, and become accustomed to them, often complaining all the while.
posted by lore at 12:41 PM on February 22, 2010 [1 favorite]

Look at the larger strategy: "Brandslamming" allows critics to show the predictable taste their target , and reinforce how above the fray they perceive their own aesthetic taste. It's turtles all the way down, actually.
posted by effluvia at 12:43 PM on February 22, 2010

I thought it was simply because they are both really ugly. Ed Hardy clothes are gaudy and yes, worn typically by people with similarly gaudy personalities. And bluetooth headset just look ridiculous.
posted by molecicco at 12:44 PM on February 22, 2010

Re: bluetooth headsets...

I used to work in a coffee shop. Often times, people would be in line, talking on their bluetooths. When it was their turn to order, rather than end the conversation, they would whisper their order to me, as to not offend the person they were talking with on the phone. They had no regard for the person who was right in front of them, nor any regard for the other customers in the store who didn't want to hear about that person's latest gossip.

Another silly thing that happens is you think someone is talking to you, and you respond to them, only to realize they're wearing a bluetooth and not talking to you.

I agree with what others say; it's about the behaviors associated with some users, not the product itself.
posted by too bad you're not me at 12:47 PM on February 22, 2010 [2 favorites]

In other words, doesn't counterculture aid capitalism by inventing new demographic segments and product opportunities?
Counterculture is the R&D arm of capitalism, yes. The problem is that the researchers don't realize that fact, and keep getting angry when their work is productized.
posted by verb at 12:49 PM on February 22, 2010 [12 favorites]

This question reminds me how completely uncool I am, as I didn't even know there was such a person as Ed Hardy until I read the post and thread. I am hopeful that you feel better by comparing your pop culture awareness with that of my clueless self.

I love my Bluetooth but I use it in the car or when on the street headed to/from the car only. I never appreciate being in a confined space with someone who is on the phone, via headset or otherwise, because for some reason people lose the awareness of their own volume that they normally have in face to face conversation.

As for male cologne, I'm a fan if the amount used is small enough that only someone standing close to you will pick it up. (The same rule applies to women's perfume, which I love too.)
posted by bearwife at 12:50 PM on February 22, 2010

The backlash against Bluetooth headsets is the exact same thing as the backlash against cell-phones and beepers 15 years ago: the folks who are most conspicuous with them are also the most obnoxious. We can all imagine the self-important douchebag sleazy lawyer or Wall-Streeter with the Bluetooth headset. Same thing 15 years ago where that dude would've been one of the only people with a cell-phone.

Regarding cologne, it's one of those things that's supposed to be private. Unless we're intimate, I should not even know whether you're wearing cologne. Cologne strong enough to be smelled is obnoxious, and it's about as tacky as exposed underwear. This holds for women as well. Perfume's supposed to be subtle, not obvious.
posted by explosion at 12:51 PM on February 22, 2010

If you have to tell people that you are cool, then you are not cool.

People who wear Ed Hardy, generally speaking, are loudly trying to tell people "I am cool."
posted by xotis at 12:51 PM on February 22, 2010 [1 favorite]

I enjoy playing the game "bluetooth or psychopath" when I see folks talking to themselves on the street. And because of this, when I use a wired headset while I'm walking down the street I'm always compelled to hold the phone near my mouth so at least it looks like I'm using a phone.

I'm not offended by the general use of BT, in fact I'd be happy if my phone supported it. However, I hate the (ed hardy wearing?) douchebags who wear that damn attachment on their head everywhere they go. There's a guy in my office that wears it and he's a phone-based sales rep. Catch is, the BT has nothing to do with his work phone line. Like he's so damn important that he needs to be half a second away from every personal phone call he gets during the day.
posted by mrsshotglass at 1:04 PM on February 22, 2010 [3 favorites]

Piggybacking off Vaike, I've heard people say that Ed Hardy's licensing 'sell-out' was exactly that: he took unique, (and I can't prove this but this is what I heard) originally 'one-of-a-kind' designs that people had written on their bodies and allowed them to be mass-produced. I'm betting that at least part of the backlash against him are folks who have to spend the rest of their lives walking around with mass-market merchandising on their biceps, rather than the outsider art they originally thought they were getting.
posted by Valet at 1:11 PM on February 22, 2010 [1 favorite]

I don't know if you remember when answering machines first became popular . . .

But I don't think using bluetooth headsets will necessarily become as omnipresent as answering machines. There are also things that are popular for a little bit and then go away. I think we're still trying to figure out where we stand as a culture on these things and it could still go either way. For example, if a federal law is passed banning all cellphone conversations in vehicles and bluetooth headsets lose some of their utility, most people might stop using them.
posted by ekroh at 1:33 PM on February 22, 2010

A Bluetooth headset seems to be associated with executive-type people (or people who aspire to be "executive" in appearance if not job title) who are just so busy and important they are always on their phone and talk on their phone all the time with no regard to the people around them.

I'd rather say that these days a Bluetooth headset is associated with sales people. Example: "Over the last few years, Bluetooth headsets have become must-have accessories for sales people, couriers and anyone who spends a great deal of time on the road." In other words: a Bluetooth headset is a movable cubicle, not a status symbol. It's useful in the car, but annoying for others if you talk on the phone while standing in line to pay for groceries.

I wear cologne probably once or twice a week, in very small quantities. Am I "doing it wrong" as the kids say now?

Nothing wrong with using cologne every day, just don't overdo it. Try this: after your morning shower, spray cologne once or twice up in the air. Take one step forward and wait a second or two.
posted by iviken at 1:41 PM on February 22, 2010

OK, I hate Ed Hardy clothes and bluetooth headsets as much as anyone here, but some of this is just countersignaling. For me to complain about these things (and I do) is a way of demonstrating my own "authenticity" in somewhat the same way that a guy with an Ed Hardy shirt is trying to demonstrate his coolness.

I'm reminded of the stolen-bike question where lots of MeFites got all macho and talked about the beating they would administer to anyone who stole their bike ...in much the same tone I would expect from an Ed Hardy-outfitted douchebag talking about his 4x4.

Which is all just to say that sometimes indifference is a better response than anger, and you shouldn't necessarily worry about being "out of touch" :)
posted by pete_22 at 1:42 PM on February 22, 2010 [6 favorites]

Ed Hardy/Christian Audiger -> garish, worn by garish celebrities who are trying too hard. It's just tacky. I mean, look at it. It's hideous. Trying to look tough when you're not, and also too old and too well off to be all caught up with trying to look tough. (But it is OK for teenagers to look silly when trying to look tough IMHO, that is part of being a teenager.)

I don't have much opinion on Bluetooth except it makes it occasionally hard to tell the difference between angry, crazy man on the street who's talking to himself & thus to be avoided because you never know when he might pop off, and man who's actually talking on the phone via Bluetooth. Stresses me a little.
posted by citron at 1:46 PM on February 22, 2010

Wow, thanks everyone. This was great, and seems totally obvious now that it has been explained.

I watch my fair share of TV but I don't watch reality shows. $300 for a pair of pants, not even dress pants? Yikes.

I looked up a picture of the "after" Jon Gosselin and I immediately understood. Yikes. If I ever become that I hope a friend performs a mercy killing on me. As a child of the 70's and 80's I have to admit that "douchebag" being an actual identifiable taxonomy of person/style is incredibly amusing.

And based on how I use my phone, I think I'll be OK wearing my Bluetooth headset, but then putting it in my pocket when I'm done talking. A lot of the behavior you guys described I would never even consider. In the car, I put people on hold if I'm ordering from a drive-thru, and I tell the caller to hang on when I interact with the cashier. I guess I just operate off a common cellphone etiquette anytime, regardless of what method I'm using, phone or earpiece, so the BT hate struck me as odd. Basically the earpiece enables the bad behavior, in a way. How very odd.

I've truly been enlightened. Thanks AskMe! Everyone gets an A.
posted by discountfortunecookie at 1:49 PM on February 22, 2010

Another grammar battle I will eventually lose: there are other Bluetooth devices besides headsets; these are correctly called Bluetooth headsets.
posted by theredpen at 2:05 PM on February 22, 2010

I have no idea who Ed Hardy is.

Bluetooth headset users always come across to me as if they might as well be wearing a sandwich board reading I AM NOT REALLY PAYING ATTENTION TO OUR CONVERSATION/MY DRIVING/PUBLIC POLITESSE BECAUSE I MIGHT GET A VERY VERY IMPORTANT CALL AT ANY MINUTE. SO IMPORTANT, IN FACT, THAT I WILL NOT BE ABLE TO WHIP MY PHONE OUT OF MY POCKET OR BAG FAST ENOUGH TO BEGIN IT. It bespeaks the same solipsistic view of the world that makes me want to take movie talkers and people who stand lost in contemplation as they have stepped off the escalator and belabour them about the head and shoulders with a truncheon.

So, yeah, while conspicous consumption is part of it, it goes beyond that. Self-important douchebaggery might cover it.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 3:12 PM on February 22, 2010 [1 favorite]

I have no idea who Ed Hardy is and I believe Bluetooth headsets have been adequately covered; however, I would like to address the issue of cologne. I think there are two reasons that colognes/perfumes are falling more and more out of favor:

1) Unlike colognes/perfumes of old that were based on actual botanical extracts, musk glands, etc., the products of today are by and large cooked up in laboratories and contain all kinds of potentially toxic or allergenic ingredients. Therefore, more people are sensitive to them, even at low levels of exposure.

2) The entire concept of colognes/perfumes is becoming outmoded. Their original purpose was to avoid offending others when we had a lot more offensive odors due to inconvenience of bathing, lack of effective deodorants, infrequent laundering, and so forth. Today we have perfectly adequate hygiene AND, most importantly, we are now all crammed into airtight buildings, subways, cube farms, etc. I would submit in these circumstances, it is rude to impose your odor on others, and that the modern way to avoid offending others is to be as odorless as possible.
posted by HotToddy at 3:34 PM on February 22, 2010

I always thought the issue wasnt with Hardy selling out (whatever that means, he is a commercial artist) but the whole maxi-print/loud color tshirt thing. People who wear that stuff want attention. They want to make themselves the center of attention. They want loud mufflers on their sportscars. They want loud subwoofers, because life is all about them. They're the precious snowflakes and the rest of us are just background. Its this attitude people hate.

If you took a Hardy design, toned down the colors, and made it smaller, no one would care because the assholes of the world wouldn't buy it.
posted by damn dirty ape at 5:36 PM on February 22, 2010

A musical perspective on Ed Hardy...
posted by maryrussell at 6:02 PM on February 22, 2010

The Ed Hardy/Bluetooth devices questions have been answered well, so I'll address your cologne question.

Has there been some shift in acceptability of scents on males in the last few years? Practically every straight male I know wears either aftershave or cologne. I wear cologne probably once or twice a week, in very small quantities. Am I "doing it wrong" as the kids say now?

This is very, very personal. Some people really love cologne on men, some don't. I fall firmly in the "don't" camp, but I have a very sensitive nose. I cannot stand colognes or perfumes. All I and the rest of us with sensitive noses ask is that you don't bathe in cologne. If you can smell it really well after you put it on, you're wearing too much. Spray it away from yourself, wait a split second and then walk through the spray. If you're splashing it on, just use a tiny bit. Really. Please.

As for gay/straight cologne use? I have no clue.
posted by cooker girl at 6:43 PM on February 22, 2010

Just weighing in to say I like barely perceptible cologne on a guy, although I also like the freshly showered guy smell, and even the sweaty guy smell sometimes. I don't know anyone who says "I only like guys who wear cologne," but I do have friends who say "I don't like guys who wear cologne."
posted by sallybrown at 6:46 PM on February 22, 2010

1) Ed Hardy hate is a class issue. Bedazzled shit is for folks who have the dough for the shiny but not the discernment to deploy it in classy ways e.g. out of blue Tiffany boxes.

2) Bluetooth earphones when not on the phone mark you as part of the Borg. It's an affront to humanity.

3) The only acceptable use of cologne or perfume is to disguise the scent of the dead hooker rotting in your basement. Everyone who wears a scent you can smell over a foot away has recently handled a corpse and should be reported to the police.

Also, shitty mall perfume does give me a wanger headache and an unrelenting urge to kill.
posted by klangklangston at 9:19 PM on February 22, 2010

!. Agree with fixedgear, those shirts are hideous. (Wouldn't know from the tattoos; they're all hideous as well, IMO.)

2. Like a Segway rider, the earpiece (of whatever brand) just makes the wearer look ridiculous. Having a conversation on it in close proximity to others is just as annoying as any other bozo yammering away on their mobile phone. But even worse are the cell-phoners who use their mobile in speakerphone mode.
posted by Rash at 10:37 AM on February 23, 2010

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