Does this qualify for an annulment or divorce?
February 2, 2010 8:37 AM   Subscribe

YANA(or my)L: does it looks like this marriage would qualify for an annulment or a divorce?

Yes, I know I need to get in touch with a lawyer. Due to some work restraints during typical business hours, I'm going to be unable to do so for a few days and would like any input on this that anyone might have for the time being.

The situation:

One of the parties lives in Texas, one lives in Idaho. The ceremony took place in Texas on January 7.

Since getting married, one of the parties has realized/admitted to wanting a polyamorous lifestyle while the other partner believes strictly in monogamy.

It appears on all sides to be an irreconcilable difference because the partner on the polyamarous side of the equation is no longer willing to commit to a monogamous relationship.

Would this marriage be qualified for an annulment? I know that a short time frame isn't the only qualification for one, and am wondering if the concealment of wanting a polyamarous lifestyle could count as entering into the marriage fraudulently which is one of the criteria I've been able to find when looking online.

Thanks.
posted by anonymous to Law & Government (13 answers total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
 
Yes, I know I need to get in touch with a lawyer. Due to some work restraints during typical business hours, I'm going to be unable to do so for a few days

Well, lawyers have been known to work outside of typical business hours.
posted by Jaltcoh at 8:41 AM on February 2, 2010


I don't know any lawyer who would not do a consultation outside of typical business hours. And I know a lot of lawyers.
posted by The World Famous at 8:52 AM on February 2, 2010


Are you asking about an annulment (a religious edict) or a divorce (a legal proceeding)?

It's not clear from your question what you're trying to get an answer to.
posted by dfriedman at 8:54 AM on February 2, 2010


Just make an appointment with a lawyer. No one can answer these questions for you as a free favor in the meantime while you wait for your schedule to allow the convenience of meeting with the professional you will pay for these services. The rules vary state-to-state and application turns on sets of very specific facts. To answer this question, someone would need to determine which jurisdiction to apply to the proceedings, whether or not the proceedings would be mutually voluntary or not, know a whole bunch more details than you have presented and then (correctly, no less) apply those facts to the law of the jurisdiction previously determined.
posted by bunnycup at 8:55 AM on February 2, 2010 [3 favorites]


Contact a family law attorney in the location where you are. They can explore options in both jurisdictions. They will get the law research done. You need to work fast. Call today! Do not delay! It is the filing which is going to be the issue and that takes time and effort you need to be putting in now.

Sorry things aren't working out.
posted by Ironmouth at 8:57 AM on February 2, 2010


Are you asking about an annulment (a religious edict) or a divorce (a legal proceeding)?

It's not clear from your question what you're trying to get an answer to.


Note an annulment is also a legal proceeding, usually able to take care of these situations within a few weeks or months of the marriage. It is not only a religous issue.
posted by Ironmouth at 8:58 AM on February 2, 2010


Are you asking about an annulment (a religious edict) or a divorce (a legal proceeding)?

It's not clear from your question what you're trying to get an answer to.


The OP wants legal advice about getting a divorce or annulment. This is quite clear from the question: "Does this qualify for an annulment or divorce? ...Yes, I know I need to get in touch with a lawyer."
posted by Jaltcoh at 9:03 AM on February 2, 2010


I believe that in Texas, annulment is a legal (as opposed to religious) issue. Here's a decent rundown on what annulment is, although I really cannot account for any veracity in the blog post, especially considering it is from 2005.

The statute you are looking for is in the Texas Family Code, Chapter 6 - I think the one that applies is 6.107 (marriage under fraud).

You need to contact a lawyer in Texas to know for sure.
posted by jabberjaw at 9:04 AM on February 2, 2010


Though you didn't say so in the question, if a Catholic annulment is what's at question here, there's a strong basis for one. As long as you can demonstrate the polyamorous partner felt that way prior to the marriage, than you have what the church calls partial simulation with regard to fidelity (basically, Catholic marriage vows require both spouses to commit to monogamy with one another - if someone entered the marriage with the intent to ignore that commitment, they entered it invalidly). Proceedings can be undertaken in the local diocese in Texas, Idaho or where the marriage took place. Contact the diocese tribunal office - lawyers aren't necessary for annulments in the United States.
posted by l33tpolicywonk at 9:05 AM on February 2, 2010


I think the fact that you are not living together helps you. The sites I looked at concerning annulment in TX (here and here) indicate that if you continue living together after the fraud is discovered, that can prevent you from getting an annulment. I would gather evidence that you were living in separate places (bills, receipts, etc) from as soon after the wedding took place as possible. I think you could make a decent case that one partner concealing the desire for polyamory is fraud.
posted by selfmedicating at 9:07 AM on February 2, 2010


To annul is to "declare invalid;" a divorce ends a valid marriage. Jurisdiction will matter as to whether annulment is an option for a marriage that should never have happened, but there is indeed such a thing as a secular legal annulment, at least in some places.

The whole religious thing comes about where divorce is not regligiously sanctioned -- your only option is to have the original marriage decalred invalid as far as the religion is concerned. But how this relates to a civil annulment or divorce does not seem to be related to the question.
posted by Quinbus Flestrin at 10:01 AM on February 2, 2010


The main question about whether this would qualify for a legal annulment is whether or not the polyamorist was poly before the wedding and somehow concealed this from the other spouse. If this happened, then yeah, fraud of this sort is probably material and can be grounds for an annulment in some states. But the courts don't tend to grant annulments just because someone changed their mind. That's what divorce is for.

The religious issue isn't something I'm qualified to address; ask a priest.

As far as "qualifying" for a divorce... there aren't really any criteria here. You file for divorce, and once the property issues are settled, the court grants your motion, particularly when it isn't contested.

Either way, you need a lawyer to get this done.
posted by valkyryn at 10:46 AM on February 2, 2010


Folks, not to hijack, but bunnycup's post was entirely on point and should have ended the thread. The rife speculation (some of which is doubly faulty because it is based on a misreading of the OP's question) is more harmful than helpful. OP: stop reading the thread and go talk a lawyer as quickly as possible.
posted by Pontius Pilate at 11:24 AM on February 2, 2010 [2 favorites]


« Older Facebook Daddy Issue   |   How do I make Blu-Ray work on a standard computer? Newer »
This thread is closed to new comments.