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October 9, 2009 10:19 PM   Subscribe

Spanish filter: please translate this short paragraph.

My Spanish grammar is a little rusty so I'm seeking some advice on how to properly translate something I'm working on. I'd like this to sound like a voiceover for a family-friendly documentary, along the lines of March of the Penguins. And I would prefer a dialect of Spanish that doesn't point specifically to any particular region, as much as that's possible. Here's the text I need:

"And so, as you will see if you look very closely, some objects are very smooth, while others are quite bumpy or rough to the touch. These differences in texture are much more apparent when magnified, than when viewed by the naked eye."

¡Gracias, colmena!
posted by twistofrhyme to Writing & Language (5 answers total)
 
Best answer: As always with translation, everyone will give you a slightly different version and there are many possible ones, but here´s mine (from a Spanish from Spain native speaker):

“Como verán si lo observan de cerca, algunos objetos son muy suaves, mientras que otros son rugosos o ásperos al tacto. Estas diferencias de textura, que no siempre se perciben a simple vista, se evidencian mucho más fácilmente en aumento.”

This uses the plural form of “you” and, because it is translated formally (addressed to a formal “ustedes” instead of the informal “vosotros”), should also work for Latin American Spanish.
posted by lux at 2:36 AM on October 10, 2009


Best answer: lux's translation is perfect and region neutral. I'd simplify the last sentence a bit. This is Latin American Spanish:

"...Estas diferencias de textura, que no siempre se perciben a simple vista, son más aparentes cuando se ven en aumento.”
posted by clearlydemon at 6:08 AM on October 10, 2009


Best answer: I agree that lux's translation is spot-on and neutral, but I prefer clearlydemon's take on the last sentence (native Spanish speaker here - Latin American).

Has the rest of the text (assuming there's more) been translated using the plural form of you? Being a family-oriented documentary, I can also see this being narrated in the 2nd person singular (informal "tu"). i.e.: Como verás si lo observas de cerca....
posted by juva at 9:38 AM on October 10, 2009


Response by poster: Great advice- thanks so much, all.

I'm going to go with lux' first line, and clearlydemon's second line.

And juva, thanks for raising the formality question. I thought about it for a while and decided to stay with Ustedes, because from the narrator character's point of view within the story, the audience is adult- it's the home viewing audience that's made up of all children, so they're listening to an adult speak to other adults. (Does that make sense, or just in my tiny brain? Anyway, it does make sense to me.)

Thank you for the excellent, quick responses! Case closed.
posted by twistofrhyme at 10:31 AM on October 10, 2009


As another native Latin American Spanish speaker, I agree with everyone. lux's translation is just what you're looking for, but I also prefer clearlydemon's take on the end of the second sentence.
posted by aint broke at 10:43 AM on October 10, 2009


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