Wank

August 1, 2006 8:05 PM

Is there a website or blog that snarks on corporate wank, perhaps on specific companies' "core values" and "mission statements"? I've seen the buzzword bingo and know about the Wankometer but I'm interested in corporate wank in a train-wreck kind of way, and trying to understand what possesses them to pile it on and infest their webpages with it. I can't seem to Google up much that's relevant.
posted by zek to Work & Money (13 answers total)

You may enjoy the sometimes subtle and sometimes not so subtle pranks and writings from the nice folks at RTMARK. It's humor and social commentary though, not explanation.
posted by jessamyn at 8:11 PM on August 1, 2006

Whilst not specifically what you are looking for, you may like the Web Economy Bullshit Generator.
posted by Jon Mitchell at 8:55 PM on August 1, 2006

...Which is linked to via your second link. My apologies.
posted by Jon Mitchell at 8:56 PM on August 1, 2006

Mmm, Consumerist hits this sometimes. (You should write them and request more studies in corpo-linguistics--I think that stuff is fascinating too.) They were talking about Comcast's "corporate hogwash" earlier today.
posted by RJ Reynolds at 9:20 PM on August 1, 2006

Action Item!, Bullfighter and a Technorati search for "jargon" turned up this young blog.
posted by milkrate at 9:35 PM on August 1, 2006

ah, crap. there is a funny fake/satirical site sending up corporate consultants & the hot air they spew out ("leveraging and synergising your core competencies to achieve value-added brand distinction through industry best practices...")...

...but i can't remember what the hell it was called. just hoping this jogs somebody's memory.
posted by UbuRoivas at 10:21 PM on August 1, 2006

This site takes the affectionate piss out of the UK Civil Service and jargon used there.
posted by greycap at 10:33 PM on August 1, 2006

Are you having an e-dentity crisis? Enormicom can help.
posted by O9scar at 10:39 PM on August 1, 2006

Don Watson's Weasel Words.

'25 April, 1915: Implementation of Anglo-French Dardanelles strategy for regime change in Ottoman Empire flawed by inappropriate planning and non-level playing field, impacting adversely on non-enemy attriting levels and requiring proactive implementation of exit strategy and Anzac legend.'
posted by obiwanwasabi at 11:13 PM on August 1, 2006

I was about to link to Weasel Words, but will content myself with Despair Inc.
posted by flabdablet at 2:55 AM on August 2, 2006

Similar, but not spot-on:

http://www.huhcorp.com

"Our office is really modern and we've got nice computers and stuff. If you ever saw it, you'd say "Wow, cool office. These guys are legit.""
posted by Wild_Eep at 7:49 AM on August 2, 2006

I went to look at the Consumerist link, and what did I find? The Consumerist Ask Metafilter Round-Up.

If this thread makes their roundup, there will be Perpetual Motion.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 8:19 AM on August 2, 2006

Perpetual motion having been implemented, let us embrace this opportunity to leverage proactive synergies going forward.
posted by flabdablet at 8:45 PM on August 2, 2006 [1 favorite]