Stubborn Senile Grandpa Help
April 7, 2008 10:18 AM Subscribe
Senile Stubborn Grandpa Filter. My grandfather lost my grandmother 5 years ago. My mom is the only one around to take care of him now. They live in Michigan. Since my grandmother's death, his mind and body have deteriorated considerably. My mother and I think he is getting / has dementia.
posted by kaizen to Human Relations (17 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
My mom decided it was best for him to sell his house and move into senior living. He resisted this with great force, and every day he would change his mind about moving. My mother finally convinced him to move into a 'senior apartment building'. The day he moved in he said 'Get me out of this f*cking place'. He wanted to move back into the house. He is borderline incapable of taking care of himself. We hired a caregiver to come in and cook dinner for him daily and clean for him ( Who we suspect is now trying to cozy up to my grandfather for his financial generosity). The caregiver is still in contact with him.
2 months ago he fell and bumped his head. He was put in a nursing home for two weeks, and then it was decided that he would move into a assisting living facility. He moved in three days ago. Today he tells my mother 'I am getting out of this f*cking place, I hate my bed, I have my own money, I am going to buy another house, and leave this place'. My mom is extremely upset and at her wits end. She is spending a considerable amount of time and effort dealing with this situation, trying to take care of him, and dealing with his inability to see that he cannot take care of himself anymore. He is extremely stubborn. He still insists he can drive, and it is just a matter of time before he crashes into a tree. My mom doesn't have the heart to take his keys away from him. Put simply, he is a stubborn, miserable, impossible man. He refuses to get tested for dementia or alheizmers.
How can we deal with this situation emotionally and tactically? We are running the risk of him going out and writing a check for a new house, crashing his SUV into someone, or giving all his money away to this temptress of a caregiver? My mom is emotionally and physically drained. If I had my druthers I would take his keys away, and freeze his assets. But legally, I don't think this is a possibility. What can we do to keep him safe, and maintain my mothers sanity?