Love...
January 27, 2008 10:47 AM Subscribe
What is love? What does love feel like? How do you know when you're in love?
This post was deleted for the following reason: I'd say "imponderable and unanswerable" is a good start on what's wrong with this post. There are some decent links in the comments you've gotten, so I hope that helps you out, but this way too crazily broad and subjective a question they way you've asked it. -- cortex
You might want to check out this previous question, What's it like to feel loved? if you haven't already.
posted by zeph at 11:03 AM on January 27, 2008
posted by zeph at 11:03 AM on January 27, 2008
Read bell hooks' All About Love: New Visions.
More info here.
It's is my favorite book ever.
posted by lunit at 11:07 AM on January 27, 2008
More info here.
It's is my favorite book ever.
posted by lunit at 11:07 AM on January 27, 2008
Love is not binary/a switch/a big truck. It's a continuum. Everyone has experienced love to lesser or greater degrees.
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 11:09 AM on January 27, 2008 [2 favorites]
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 11:09 AM on January 27, 2008 [2 favorites]
How do you know when you're in love?
The best definition is probably that of Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart, "I'll know it when I see it." (Though he was talking about porn, not love... An ironic distinction here, actually.) Of course, despite it being the best way I can convey the answer, it's also the least helpful answer I could give.
I suspect it can manifest differently in different people, but it's an infatuation or obsession with someone. Often, but not necessarily, there are elements of irrationality. (I don't mean misguided irrationality, just that it's hard to rationalize exactly why you're so drawn to someone.)
posted by fogster at 11:20 AM on January 27, 2008
The best definition is probably that of Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart, "I'll know it when I see it." (Though he was talking about porn, not love... An ironic distinction here, actually.) Of course, despite it being the best way I can convey the answer, it's also the least helpful answer I could give.
I suspect it can manifest differently in different people, but it's an infatuation or obsession with someone. Often, but not necessarily, there are elements of irrationality. (I don't mean misguided irrationality, just that it's hard to rationalize exactly why you're so drawn to someone.)
posted by fogster at 11:20 AM on January 27, 2008
If you can not tell if something is love, its probably not.
:P
posted by ooklala at 11:21 AM on January 27, 2008
:P
posted by ooklala at 11:21 AM on January 27, 2008
ooklala has it. It's when you see someone suffering and really, honestly wish you could do something to transfer the pain to yourself instead, just to make them feel better. It's when you're happy just because they're in the room, even if one of you are reading a book and the other is playing a video game, with no interaction. It's when you feel an actual physical panic whenever confronted by the idea that they won't be there forever. It's completely irrational, and totally horrifying, and one of the best things ever.
posted by Kellydamnit at 11:26 AM on January 27, 2008 [2 favorites]
posted by Kellydamnit at 11:26 AM on January 27, 2008 [2 favorites]
Heinlein (who I normally despise) defines love as, roughly, "the condition in which the health and welfare of another human being is not only intrinsic to your own, it is more important."
That seems to me to be the closest one can come to a definition. It's rough around the edges, of course, but I think it works.
posted by dirtynumbangelboy at 11:27 AM on January 27, 2008
That seems to me to be the closest one can come to a definition. It's rough around the edges, of course, but I think it works.
posted by dirtynumbangelboy at 11:27 AM on January 27, 2008
It would be easier to answer this question if you provided more information on why you're asking.
posted by jouke at 11:44 AM on January 27, 2008
posted by jouke at 11:44 AM on January 27, 2008
Love includes, but is definitely not limited to, the answers given on this thread.
posted by escabeche at 12:06 PM on January 27, 2008
posted by escabeche at 12:06 PM on January 27, 2008
Not to snark, but there are thousands of years of art that try, in some way, to answer your first question. You may want to look for your answer in that realm.
If your question is more focused on the "How do you know when you're in love?" part, you might want to make that clearer and let us know what sort of situation you are wondering about.
posted by ssg at 12:13 PM on January 27, 2008
If your question is more focused on the "How do you know when you're in love?" part, you might want to make that clearer and let us know what sort of situation you are wondering about.
posted by ssg at 12:13 PM on January 27, 2008
Baby, don't hurt me! Don't hurt me no more!
posted by subbes at 12:19 PM on January 27, 2008 [2 favorites]
posted by subbes at 12:19 PM on January 27, 2008 [2 favorites]
Love, to me, is unconditional support, security, warmth, and caring for something more than you care about yourself.
If you're looking for a more scientific answer, try browsing through this or the books of anthropologist Helen Fisher. It's really interesting stuff.
posted by missjamielynn at 12:20 PM on January 27, 2008
If you're looking for a more scientific answer, try browsing through this or the books of anthropologist Helen Fisher. It's really interesting stuff.
posted by missjamielynn at 12:20 PM on January 27, 2008
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by parmanparman at 10:57 AM on January 27, 2008