how much do you tip? am i a good tipper?

May 13, 2007 11:42 AM

Am I a good tipper?

I usually tip a standard 20% to my waiter, unless the service warrants more or less. The 20% guideline is one that's pretty universally recognized and easy to follow. But how about these other situations?

How much do you tip a valet parker? The service is free in Vegas, and everyone tips. Valet parkers make decent money here given the nature of their work. I tip about $2 or $3. I think this is close to avg from what I've seen, but there's no guidelines I've ever heard of.

How much do you tip at at a buffet? When the server doesn't do anything really but seat you and get you your drink order (non-alcoholic), how much do you tip? I usually just leave a couple ones on the table. They didn't really do anything.

How much do you tip a barber The place I go to charges $16 for a haircut. I usually give the dude a $20 and tell him to keep it.

How much do you tip room service I've noticed when I stay in a nice hotel the room service menu says a 20% gratuity will be added to the bill. That's a lot! I think this amount should excuse me from tipping the room service dude but I feel like a jackass if I don't cough up more. What's the right thing to do in this situation?

How much do you tip at a carwash? If the dude just towel-dries after I go through the wash, I hand him a couple bucks. If it's a nice detailing I probably do $5 or $10 depending on what kind of cash I have on me.

Also, I have a friend who's a bartender at a local bar here in Vegas, the kind where people sit for hours and play video poker. He seems to feel bartenders are entitled to a 10% tip on jackpots, and I feel this is bullshit. I don't gamble at all, but if I were playing I'd tip a flat $5 at most, no matter how much I win. Unless this dude is covering 10% of my losses, why is he entitled to 10% of my winnings?

posted by b_thinky to Society & Culture (29 answers total)

Basic Tips on Tipping: How Much and To Whom? (from Get Rich Slowly.)
posted by Hankins at 12:01 PM on May 13, 2007

I was a valet at one point in a major american metropolitan city. If the lot was tip-only, this was my general opinion:

$0 - Close your own door..
$1 - Don't waste my time
$2-3 - Average Joe
$4-5 - An extra thanks and a smile

In cases where the tip is TIA (Tip in Advance), these individuals are generally paying for extra service and expect it. For instance, they expect the car to be parked VIP (up front), or that the car is ready before they exit the restaurant. This varies from lot-to-lot, but generally is around the $20 mark.

So you're on the average mark for a tip-only valet lot. For "pay lots", i.e. $5-to-park-and-we-get-your-car, there's less of an expectation for a tip, but its appreciated. You shouldn't feel bad not tipping a guy who's already made money on you.

Oh, finally -- never, ever, ever tip a valet with change, no matter how much it is. The valet is running around all night and change banging around in his pocket is very annoying.

I used to "accidentally" drop any change I received at a customer's feet, hopefully in front of a crowd of people...
posted by WetherMan at 12:04 PM on May 13, 2007

Valet: $5.
Buffet: 20% (hey, buffets are cheap, sure they deserve less but its the matter of a dollar or two).
Barber: 20%-50%, depends on how well they do.
Room service: I don't do room service anymore, precisely because the "required gratuiity" makes me feel like I'm eitehr a chump (for paying it twice) or a jerk (in case the required part doesn't go to the server). As pizza joints increase their delivery charges, I' for the the same reason less likely to order pizza.
Carwash: I don't do carwashes.
posted by orthogonality at 12:50 PM on May 13, 2007

Valet: $5
Buffet: 15%-20% (sure, they aren't serving you in particular, but they have to clean up after everyone)
Barber: About 35-50%
Room service: $10
Carwash: I was my own car, or go through a drive-through where no one's touching the car.

In general I believe that there's no such thing as under-tipping. Many jobs in the service industry rely on tips, and employers are legally allowed to under-pay because of the assumption of a tip. Which is bullshit. I feel there are two kinds of people in this world (with regards to tipping): those who have had to survive off tips, and those who never have. I've had to live off tips, and I can tell you the whole walk a mile in someone else's shoes has forever changed my attitude towards tipping.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 1:00 PM on May 13, 2007

"Unless this dude is covering 10% of my losses, why is he entitled to 10% of my winnings?"

Oh, missed that bit. Yeah, I don't gamble, and your friend is on crack.
posted by orthogonality at 1:19 PM on May 13, 2007

Valet: $3 when I pick up my car. If I want my car kept close, I tip $5 up front (and usually nothing on the back end, maybe $1). I picked up this behavior working valet at a fancy resort.

Buffet: 15%, I suppose. But the only buffetts I can remember going to are the pricey ones at the Bellagio and Wynn in Vegas. I'm not sure what I'd tip at the local Chinese buffett.

Barber: $4 on a $16 bill is probably average. I usually tip $10 on my $35 haircuts. When I was getting pricier haircuts in NYC and SF, I'd pay about double that and would tip double--the reaction I got made me think I was being generous, but I dunno how true that is.

Room service: I usually just leave a couple bucks in addition to the automatic gratuity, but only because it feels weird to leave that line blank. But room service is one of life's great rip-offs (price of food, quality of food), so I think the 20% auto-tip is sufficient.

Carwash: $3 on a ~$16 carwash.

Bartender @ video poker: I've only ever played video poker while killing time waiting for something, and then I only tipped the bartender for the drinks I received. It never occurred to me to tip on the winnings in that situation.

Dealer @ table games: I don't think your "Unless this dude is covering 10% of my losses" reasoning works here. It's basically mandatory that you tip, both as you play and when you win. It makes things more fun.
posted by mullacc at 1:58 PM on May 13, 2007

Card dealer wages are based on the expectation they will get tips, though I rarely see tips without a win. It's pretty easy to pick up the vibe at tables by just watching a few hands to see how others tip.
posted by jmd82 at 2:30 PM on May 13, 2007

Speak for yourself, missmagenta. Minimum wage isn't a decent living wage by any stretch of the imagination -- though family tax credit can lessen the burden where there are children, etc.

Caveat: we don't feel obliged to tip. However, most people of my acquaintance tip for good service. For waiters, cab drivers, barbers/hairdressers, etc. 10% is standard, 15-20% for exceptional service, but its also acceptable to round the figure up -- ie, tell whoever to keep the change -- as long as the change doesn't amount to a totally pathetic sum.

We tip bar staff by offering to buy them drinks. They usually reciprocate by taking the cost of the cheapest available drink that they serve off your bill.

I don't tip hotel staff. Not sure why -- I just hate the idea that I'm obliged to do so, simply because someone is doing their job. If I did though, I'd be more inclined to tip maids rather than room service, and I carry my own bags.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 3:14 PM on May 13, 2007

I tip 17 to 20 per cent for waiters. I give more than 20% to the woman who gives me a pedicure, because hell, anyone who's dealing with my feet deserves it. I WAY over tip the woman who gives me a Brazilian bikini wax, because again...

I'm ashamed to say my hairdresser gets the short end of the stick. I get my hair done about every 2 and a half months - highlights and a cut. It's $260, and I know that's ridiculous, but this is New York, and he's great. I know most people say to tip 20% to your hairdresser, but good grief, that would be over $50! Part of the money I'm paying is going towards product, and most of it is going directly to him, not the salon. Also, I help. Yesterday I tipped him $35.00. But yes, I suppose I should at least tip him as much as a waiter. I guess I need to choose between my hair and food.
posted by Evangeline at 3:58 PM on May 13, 2007

$5 to valets on Federal Hill in Providence — because I'm a regular at a couple restaurants, because they know me and take care of me, and because $5 is still less than I'd pay to park in a lot. I can't speak to Vegas.

On the rest of 'em, I'm even with your stats.
posted by cribcage at 5:38 PM on May 13, 2007

Please excuse the piggy back, but what about hotel maid service? I never have, my wife says I should.
posted by snsranch at 5:48 PM on May 13, 2007

Speaking as someone who just finished working a hellacious 9-hour Mother's Day buffet, I can tell you this...if you think all your server does is "get you a drink," then you cannot be more wrong. Buffet servers run their asses off, probably even moreso than a server on a "normal" menu shift. Just on the obvious side...there are a shit ton more plates to clean up, silverware is a nightmare (because patrons seem to want a new fork with every fucking plate they retrieve from the buffet line), the turnover rate is astronomical (i.e., restaurant managers expect that you will be able to clean up the incredible mess in record time so that the next table can be sat), tip outs are a nightmare on buffet days (servers must tip bartenders, food runners and bussers [or is it busers?]). And let's not forget how fucking demanding most buffet customers are because they think their servers "aren't doing anything."

Tip your servers (especially when they're good to you.)
posted by AlliKat75 at 5:57 PM on May 13, 2007

Alright, former food server here. Here is my beef with tipping the way it is. In the 80's, 10% was considered a good tip. In the early 90's, it was 15%. In the last 8-10 years, a food server will turn up their noses at anything less than 20%. Although I pay the 20%, I do wonder what the logic of this is. The food costs have risen in the last twenty years so that tips have naturally risen as well. What is the logic of increasing the tipping percentage if servers would be making double what they would make in the 80's because of food cost inflation? Mark me, it will be 25% in the next 5 years and will not stop there. All this while food costs will continue to increase. Am I missing something here????
posted by boots77 at 6:32 PM on May 13, 2007 [1 favorite]

Please excuse the piggy back, but what about hotel maid service? I never have, my wife says I should.

I've heard the rule of thumb is a dollar per night, but that always seems insulting low to me - I generally leave a minimum of $5 per night. Consider more if you're the source of a particularly unpleasant or large mess (i.e if you plug the 'loo, karma would dictate an extra $10 to $20, in my book)

What is the logic of increasing the tipping percentage if servers would be making double what they would make in the 80's because of food cost inflation?

A good question I don't know the answer to. I would like to point out though, that assuming servers' wages have gone up at the same rate as food costs might not be accurate.
posted by jalexei at 7:12 PM on May 13, 2007

You left out the high schoolers and college students working behind the counter for minimum wage. I think it's polite to tip if there's a bucket/jar/box specifically for that purpose (ie coffee shops, Jamba Juice). This is especially true if your barista remembers your drink.
posted by thehmmhmm at 8:00 PM on May 13, 2007

There are two people I tip at a hotel, as I don't order room service. (I'm not counting folks in the hotel restaurant or bar, if any). That's the maid, who gets $2-$5 a night, depending on how much cash I have and how well they've done their job on previous days. Once, I left $40 for one night, when I had rented an exceedingly nice suite to have a friend's (quiet) bachelor party in, and one of his friends decided it would be funny to piss in an 80s style vase of fake "plants" (more like stems, but whatever)

I consider myself lucky I didn't get a big charge on my bill for that one. I like to think the big tip had something to do with the staff's generosity in not informing management.

I also tip the bellhop, should I bother to use their services. I usually don't, except to have them store some luggage for me before I can check in or after I check out but before I leave town. In that case, they get a dollar or two a bag up front and the same when I return. The amount depends on the size of the bag.

At restaurants, I generally tip 20% unless they're an ass, in which case they get an exceedingly low tip, so there's no possibility of them thinking I'm just one of those assholes who don't tip anyone at all. ;) I know someone who not only doesn't tip at all, but also writes a nasty note on the back of the reciept when he gets a bad server. I also know a bunch of people who are asses and won't even tip 10% no matter how good the service is, just because the food is "too expensive." IMO, if you're going to someplace expensive, you should tip well regardless.

Since I rarely get my hair cut, I don't think about the barber/stylist much, but they tend to get something similar to waitstaff, although if I'm at a very small place, I might tip more, as I know they don't see much traffic.

After reading this thread, I feel like I've been short changing the valet staff, though. In the past, I've tended not to give them more than a couple dollars in any event, although this is at large hotels where in the best case it takes 10 minutes to get your car and they charge you a per night fee. Speaking of which, I once stayed at a Sheraton in Toronto that was out of valet space and they still tried to charge me the valet parking surcharge. Needless to say, that upset me, since I had to park in some municipal garage for their fee. At that same place, a bellman told me I couldn't take my bags up myself, which irritated me to no end, as I had nearly run out of Canadian money, leaving me with no choice but to give him a shitty tip.

All in all, an annoying hotel.

The place that confuses me the most is Sonic. They bring the food out to the car, but they get paid a normal wage. And moreover, their new credit card taking system has no provision for tipping the server. I feel like I should at least give them a dollar, but they don't seem to expect anything.
posted by wierdo at 8:07 PM on May 13, 2007

Has anyone ever got any better service from tipping the maid at a hotel?
posted by smackfu at 8:44 PM on May 13, 2007

The Sports Guy (Bill Simmons) at ESPN talked about how much you should tip valets, baristas, meat cutters ... about halfway through his latest mailbag column.
posted by lukemeister at 10:01 PM on May 13, 2007

In the last 8-10 years, a food server will turn up their noses at anything less than 20%.

Anyone who does this has an inflated sense of entitlement. 20% is the standard for above-average service. If you're a server expecting 20% on average, you need to find a new line of work.
posted by oaf at 10:03 PM on May 13, 2007

I've had better service after tipping the maid at hotels MANY times.

If we're staying a few days, I make sure and tip $3-5 a night, more if I'm pleased with their service.

(Keep in mind I'm talking about "Comfort Inn" type hotels. I suspect the cleaning staff at the Embassy Suites would be insulted by my tips.)
posted by mmoncur at 10:08 PM on May 13, 2007

Huh. I've always tipped $10 a night for hotel maid service (whether it's a motel or a decent hotel), but that's probably because most people I know tip nothing and I'm willing to make up the difference.
posted by maudlin at 10:20 PM on May 13, 2007 [1 favorite]

Now I live in a place with much less of a tipping culture than the United States but I think tipping should be a personal thing *what do I feel* is right. I have a group of friends who are huge overtippers and I consider it a sign of weakness and a cry for social validation.
posted by Deep Dish at 10:59 PM on May 13, 2007

i was brought up in the 15% tip for waiters era. i'm aware of a push to raise the standard to 20% but i want to hear more discussion from both sides before i adopt it. meanwhile, waiters at new places i haven't been to before get 15% rounded up for decent service. places where i'm known, well-treated, have a good relationship with the waiter, it might be 20%, 25%, depends on mood and blood alcohol level.

new wrinkle on tipping here in oregon: tip jars on the counter at the state liquor store! what's a fair gratuity for the gal who rings up a $50 bottle of chinaco reposado with flair and panache? i say zero.
posted by bruce at 11:00 PM on May 13, 2007

Counter people get my leftover change from the transaction, if they helped me in a particular way, were really nice, or if it's really busy i will also throw in a buck. I worked at a register for a while with a tip jar and if every person that came in there would just throw in their change and the occasional dollar I would be pretty happy and end up with an additional $10-20 at the end of my shift.
posted by sophist at 11:39 PM on May 13, 2007

Something I try to keep in mind, if this is still true these days: If you are a good tipper (and I like to think I am), you should not tip on the credit card receipt, because those receipts are used to prorate the estimated tips for cash transactions in figuring taxable income. When I pay with a card, I try to tip in cash.
posted by troybob at 12:41 AM on May 14, 2007

“If you are a good tipper (and I like to think I am), you should not tip on the credit card receipt, because those receipts are used to prorate the estimated tips for cash transactions in figuring taxable income. When I pay with a card, I try to tip in cash.”

I'm a good tipper and I waited tables for a number of years, in very nice restaurants, and I've always thought that waitstaff ought to pay their income taxes just like everyone else does.¹ The only reason to prefer cash tips is to pretend to have less income than you really have. Perversely, only if everyone accepts your line of reasoning would it be the case that the sample of credit tips would be small enough to likely generate an incorrect estimate for all tips. And if a server is worried about that, they just have to document each of their cash tips on the ticket.

What's unjust is when the IRS uses a local average to determine what a server was a tipped, which they will do if they audit and don't find documentation and the declared tips seem low. On the other hand, if a server's tips really are less than the local average, they should have already moved on to another line of work.

No one has mentioned that the “acceptable tipping rate” varies regionally. It varies worldwide, though certain commoditized, worldwide, and touristy places may be pretty uniform. Outside of that, it's local at the national level and, in some countries, regionally. In the US there is considerable variation. When I waited tables twenty years ago in the southwest US (and not in one of the top-10 largest cities in the US), the standard was 15% for average service and 20% for good service. 10% definitely indicated bad service, though certain demographics still thought that 10% was "high". However, even at that time in the major coastal urban centers 20% was the average tip. So I'd say that you need to take regional variations into consideration. Las Vegas might be its own region and a special case.

1. Different restaurants handled tip declaration differently. I either declared what I actually made total in tips each night, or if I had to estimate I erred on the high-side.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 1:10 AM on May 14, 2007

I think the spirit of this question is a good one. No one really knows if they are tipping correctly because there are no real rules for tipping correctly. Of course the real winners in this are the business establishments. They can continue to pay their employees less while asking us to pay them more. Instead of restaurants charging more for food and paying their servers more, they make us pay them more, while the business keeps the profits.

Not to be a prude, but even take-out service from full-service restaurants expect tips. Chilis, Applebees, Red Lobster, TGIF, etc... seem to want tips for merely bagging your food. Once, on the sly, I asked a the "bagger/waiter" if he was used to getting tips. He said yes, but not as much as when customers sit in and eat.

Once I went in to a large Italian chain for take-out and when I gave the "bagger/waiter" the receipt with a zero written in the tip slot, he looked at it and in a low voice said sarcastically, "Sweet." Should I tip them for putting my food in a bag?

Will everyone expect tips eventually? Will firemen extend their hands after coming down from the tree with the cat? Will teachers pass around an empty jar after an especially titillating lesson? Will your realtor hand you an empty envelope with his name and address written on the front and say, "Even though I will make about $800 an hour based on the amount of work that I will do for you, you might get better service with a little extra "grease." Etc... Sorry establishment, but sometimes you really blow.
posted by boots77 at 6:46 AM on May 14, 2007

boots77:

Will everyone expect tips eventually? Will firemen extend their hands after coming down from the tree with the cat? Will teachers pass around an empty jar after an especially titillating lesson? Will your realtor hand you an empty envelope with his name and address written on the front and say, "Even though I will make about $800 an hour based on the amount of work that I will do for you, you might get better service with a little extra "grease." Etc... Sorry establishment, but sometimes you really blow.
Boots77, this is the way things used to be in many cultures, and still is, in some places. It's sometimes called baksheesh, or commission, the payment for service. At the time Samuel Pepys was writing his diary (1660-69), such commissions for "just doing your job" actually payed far more than the stated wage for the position, at least if you were a bureaucrat. As far as I can tell, the barely discernable difference between baksheesh and a bribe is that baksheesh is payed after the service has been completed.
posted by Araucaria at 12:48 PM on May 14, 2007

Ack, brain snafu. s/payed/paid/g above
posted by Araucaria at 12:49 PM on May 14, 2007